Myrtle Rising

Essential Advice on How to REALLY Live in This World - from Rav Avigdor Miller

23/5/2019

Rav Miller’s dvar Torah on Parshat Behar is a very pleasant whomp right between the eyes.

One of my favorite aspects of Rav Miller on the parsha is his description of the true-to-life experience of Jews millennia ago in the Tanach.

Using plain & simple language, he brings it all to life.

Yovel, Plus You as a Ger in This World

In Rav Miller's dvar Torah for Parshat Behar (pages 1-3), you get to experience what the Yovel year was really like at the close of the 50-year cycle in which property reverts to its original owners.

Then (pgs. 3-7), using both stories of modern times & the Chafetz Chaim, Rav Miller details our temporary dwelling in This World and what that really means for us.

Pages 7-11 introduce the concept of geirus/geirut—usually understood to mean “convert,” it also means a temporary dweller in This World. (Also like how Moshe Rabbeinu said, “I am a ger in a foreign land.” He was born Jewish, but a ger, a temporary dweller in This World.)

In the Pele Yoetz chapter entitled Ger, Rav Eliezer Papo also discusses ger/geirut according to this interpretation. With Rav Miller, you get a glimpse into what Duties of the Heart/Chovot Levavot says about this idea, plus a modern-day analogy to make things clearer, what a mezuzah should inspire within us, and then the following amazing yet true story of a connected Jew with his heart & mind in exactly the right place:

I once knew a Mr. Herman zichrono l’vracha from the Lower East Side.

Now, Mr. Herman was one of the very few devoted frum Jews in the olden days of America.

B’leiv v’nefesh [Heart & soul] he was devoted to Hakodosh Boruch Hu.

And he told me once that when he saw that all his money was going lost, that his business was quickly failing - it was at the time of the Great Depression.

So he right away took a thousand dollars - in those days a thousand dollars was a small fortune - and he gave it away to tzedakah on the spot.

He said, “Why should I lose that too? Why should I lose my chance at exporting more goods into the Next World?”

And so Mr. Herman was a smart businessman…

Gadlus. And that was a so-called “regular” Jew no one has ever heard of!

Everyone can be great. It’s not at all a matter of renown or charisma.

Just quietly live for the Next World.

No one will write a book or even newspaper obituary about you (may you live in good health until 120), but you’ll be written in Hashem’s Book, and that’s all anyone really needs.

This section also helps you figure out how much you should invest in your material world here on Earth.

It goes according to individuals and their different situations, so Rav Miller doesn’t offer hard ‘n’ fast rules, but pages 7-11 can help you figure out how to clarify things for yourself.

God's Truth is Even Better than Science Fiction

Then (pgs. 11-14) you get some insights into David Hamelech and certain popular verses of Tehillim, insights you may never have considered before. (I hadn’t.) And you get to delve into the fascinating idea of how you and everyone you know are just figments of Hashem’s Supreme Imagination.

(This is not depressing, like how it is in sci-fi novels, but actually very comforting and inspiring.)

Pages 14-17 offer more insights into popular Tehillim, plus helpful hints on how best to utilize your alone-time and how to do hitbodedut in the most crowded, noisy circumstances.

The Pre-Mashiach Jewish Reality: Stuck between a Rock & Hard Place

Do you ever find yourself irked by the following, as described by Rav Miller?:

"… a Jew is always hounded in this world; the Jew walks on the street in Europe and the goyim cast slurs on him; they tell him, 'Get out of our country you dirty Jew. Go to Israel!' And if he does, so the Arabs tell him to get out, the U.N. tells him to get out."

Jew-haters are simply impossible to please! (So why bother trying? Hint, hint…)

Anyway, Rav Miller explains on page 17 why this dynamic exists and what it means for us.

One Torah, One People

Despite differences in custom, dress, culture, time, and language, real talmidei chachim keep coming up with the same themes and lessons from Torah.

Here (pgs. 17-18) Rav Miller speaks of Hashem as your Best Friend and what that means. And he sounds exactly like Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender.

Why?

Because all the real talmidei chachamim glean from the same sources and come to the same conclusions.

It ends on the heart-warming note of what you should remember about Olam Hazeh / This World whenever you look at a mezuzah:

"It’s the place where we spend our fleeting lives preparing to enter our permanent home in the Next World, where we will meet the Hashem Echad who was our One and Only True Friend in This World."

Note: After the dedications at the end, there is a brand-new section for children: Toras Avigdor Junior, a 2-page large-print supplement accompanied by a pleasant drawing of Rav Miller with a child in the woods. After that, there is a Q&A regarding how to break the habit of losing one’s temper.

So even if you’re in Eretz Yisrael and already past this parsha, it’s very worth reading Rav Miller’s dvar Torah on it for the wealth of soul-nourishing Torah hashkafah it contains:
Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Behar: We Live in You

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How to Avoid Playing with the Most Dangerous Fire

22/5/2019

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Stay Out of It

While daas Torah unites in its primary goal (perfecting our souls & perfecting the world), it can diverge regarding how to accomplish the goal.

In shiurim in which someone asks the rabbi or rebbetzin about taking sides, either in a machloket between rabbanim or just differing streams of TORAH-TRUE Judaism (whether between the misnagdim & chassidim of yore, or the different chassidic groups, or any divergent derechs today), the answer was always:
"STAY OUT OF IT."

Rav Avigdor Miller constantly warned his listeners not to get involved in any way because he insisted it's getting involved in fire. Don't do it!

Rav Miller himself was a Slabodka Litvak. Yet not only did he never put down groups following other daas Torah, he even defended their right to follow their own Torah-based daas Torah, whether it was another type of Litvish (like Telshe) or Sephardi or any kind of Chassidus.

You can follow your Rav/Rebbe without fighting with anyone else and without denigrating anyone else, whether the Rav/Rebbe himself or someone from his group.

(Clarification: "Someone from his group" means someone who actually follows the rav, and doesn't just use a distorted version of the Rav/Rebbe's hashkafah to indulge his or her own yetzer hara.)

And honestly?

If it's a real talmid chacham, you should be able to see the value of his derech, understand WHY he is doing what he's doing...even if you don't personally follow or agree with that derech.

After exploring the issues, you should be able to come to some kind of intellectual understanding and even appreciation of a wholly Torah-allegiant yet different derech.

Furthermore, any kind of real daas Torah does not generally WANT you fighting with others, even to defend his honor.

So why do it? If you really respect him, why go against his will?

What If He isn't the Rav You Think He is?

Another reason why STAY OUT OF IT and APPRECIATE ALL LEGITIMATE TORAH PATHS are such important and helpful advice is that sometimes, you can think that your favorite speaker or your shul rabbi is a tremendous chacham for whom you're willing to go to battle.

This is particularly likely to happen among people who haven't yet gained enough knowledge to know that while their rabbi is a cool guy and a smart one, he's definitely not a talmid chacham.

I learned this lesson the hard way. (Story for another time.)

Anyway, this is something I wish I could shout from the rooftops:
Smicha does NOT mean a rabbi is wise, insightful, or good.

It COULD mean that, but it doesn't have to.

All smicha (rabbinical ordination) really means is that a guy passed a test of academic knowledge. If it was high-level smicha, he's probably intellectually intelligent.

But that doesn't mean he's "a big talmid chacham!" or anyone you should be swooning or tussling over.

(And yes, I've heard people swooning over or boasting of or defending the honor of their favorite rabbi, calling him a "a big talmid chacham" when he definitely is NOT. A smart guy? Yes. A nice, sincere guy? Maybe. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. A charismatic guy? Yes. An actual talmid chacham? NO.)

So that's another reason not to get too wound up. You might be getting wound up for no good reason at all.

Case in point: When I was becoming frum, I really thought so many people were so smart and so frum, and that certain rabbis I met were powerhouses of Torah knowledge.

Then over the years, I realized that, while all these people should be appreciated and admired and respected for their many good points, they weren't Rebbetzin or Rav Kanievsky.

And that's fine!

So while it's important to humble oneself to listen and learn from people who know more than you, there are still higher levels and lower levels of Torah knowledge & behavior, and we shouldn't make people into something they are not.

It's a tribute to frumkeit that a guy can spend his childhood and young adulthood in yeshivah, and come out with such impressive knowledge. And then as he keeps reviewing throughout life and maybe even gets smicha, he really does accumulate an impressive amount of Torah learning.

VERY GOOD.

But it doesn't mean he has internalized it.

It doesn't mean he is a talmid chacham.

Getting Down to the Nitty-Gritty

So...love and appreciate different groups and different daas Torah (REAL ones) even as you stick to your own derech.

And love and appreciate your favorite rav, but know what he is not (unless, of course, he really is a genuinely tremendous talmid chacham. Some are.).

And this all goes for me too, of course.

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What is a Clean Tongue?

20/5/2019

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A huge blindspot today is language.

Foul words have entered everyday vocabulary, with today's grandmothers using the very words (or worse) for which she originally washed out her own child's mouth with soap as a mother only 3 decades ago.

This can be true in parts of modern frum society too sometimes.

Foul English words have also entered Israeli Hebrew as slang (because they don't know what they're actually saying & because cussing in a foreign language doesn't have the same jolt). Even some frum Israelis end up using this vulgar English as slang within their modern Hebrew.

However, Judaism insists not only on non-vulgar language, but on refined language in general.

When asked about lashon nekiyah - clean language or a clean tongue - Rav Avigdor Miller mentioned the words mothers traditionally forbade their children.

Then he goes a step deeper and discusses refined language in general - "mindful speech," if you will.

For example, he explains, in Slabodka where he learned, they never said the word shlecht, which is Yiddish for "bad."

They never said the word shlecht. Never. I was there six years. Six years – and they never said the word shlecht. “Not good,” they would say. But they never said shlecht. They never referred to a goy as a “sheigetz.”

Because that’s a Sheketz. The word “sheigetz” comes from the word sheketz a disgusting creature. “Sheigetz” is sheketz. But a goy is not a sheketz. He’s a tzelem Elokim...

The word “sheigetz” is never found in Slabodka language.

So, in a good environment, if you make sure to stay in stay in a good environment, you’ll pick up what is called lashon nekiyah.

Tape #E-167

And that's worth chewing over.

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Sefirat HaOmer: How to Transform Even the Most Mundane Aspects of Life into Meaningful Success

19/5/2019

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The following is actually from Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah on Parshat Emor, but the lessons are eternal.

It's all about making the most of your time.

Sefirat HaOmer is about not wasting time; pay attention to the day that just passed and take a minute to think whether you used it properly:

At least when the sun is about to go down, remind yourself:
“Did I count today? What did I accomplish today? Is there anything to count?”

Is it just another day passing away, maybe wasted away, that won’t ever come back?

The Waste of Obsessive Thoughts

And even if you're involved in mundane albeit necessary activities, he explains how your mindset can turn the activity into a meaningful activity - or even just a meaningful moment - and what not to think or obsess over:

The wealth of life is only for a few moments.

Relatively, life is only a fleeting pause in eternity.

And therefore is it any wonder that we pray to Hakodosh Boruch Hu, we beseech Him, we beg Him: limnos yameinu kein hoda - teach us how to count our days so that we shouldn’t spend our days being bemused!

You know how many people spend their yomim with their minds preoccupied with nothing at all.

Here’s a man who’s walking around thinking about ways and means of fighting with his boss; he’s spending his days thinking of ways and means how to get even with him.

There are people going around, and they’re tense and they’re worried, thinking that they’re being persecuted by their neighbors and their mothers-in-law. They spend time bemused about the injustice that is being done to them.

And their lives are being wasted away by silly and foolish imaginations. Not lunatics! I’m talking about sane people.

And what about the people who waste their lives pursuing after imaginary wealth, instead of the true wealth of yiras Hashem; people who waste their lives pursuing imaginary pleasures?!

Change Your Day from Success to Failure with 1 Minute

Within the entire dvar Torah is also advice for men, but this post will focus on the advice for women (boldface letters are my own emphasis):

And the ladies and the girls have a glorious opportunity as well.

While they’re stirring the pot in the kitchen, while they’re sweeping the floor or sewing, whatever they’re doing, they’re thinking of Hakadosh Boruch Hu. A glorious career!

And I’m serious about that; it’s a glorious career!

Instead of taking these minutes, these diamonds, and throwing them away, they’re cashing them in. They’re the most precious achievement. You counted a few seconds while washing the dishes?! You thought about Hashem while standing in the shop?!

You’re a great person already!

Try it; try thinking for one minute that you’re standing in front of Hashem.

Even one minute of thinking during the day is so precious that you can already count that day as a success!

Even if you don’t think all the time, even though you waste a lot of time, if you’ll spend one minute of thinking, it’s a tremendous achievement.

You’re one out of ten thousand, you’re a head taller than everyone just because of that one minute.

The Fastest & Simplest Way to Uplift the Mundane

And here's some more advice, for both men & women (boldface emphasis mine):

You know, a woman can bake muffins, she can cook chicken, and she can become heroic in the kitchen.

Imagine a housewife standing in her kitchen as she is kneading the dough, she is thinking, “My hands are the hands of Hakadosh Baruch Hu; like it says,...“Hakodosh Boruch Hu in His endless kindness gives food to all the living” (Tehillim 136:25).

How does He give bread? Does He stretch his hands from the sky and hand us something?

The pshat is that it’s through the woman who’s making the challah. So if you’re baking challah or if you’re selling bread over the counter, it’s a glorious opportunity for the reishis chochma, the most valuable of all wisdom.

All the bakers should be here tonight because otherwise their lives are being wasted. Think what a baker could accomplish every time he hands a loaf across the counter, and he’s thinking: ...“I’m giving bread to all the living and I’m doing it as a shaliach of Hakadosh Baruch Hu.”

The fact that he’s being paid for it, that doesn’t detract from the greatness of this accomplishment.

And so, at the end of the day, the mother is standing in the kitchen, or maybe the baker or the grocer is standing behind the counter, and they look through the window and see the sun is going down; they should remember why Hashem made that great ball of fire:

“Don’t miss even one day!”

You remind yourself that once on Shabbos, you had prayed...“Teach me to count my days properly,” and so, in the last moment, as you put the muffins into the oven or as you hand the last loaf of bread across the counter to the boy who went on an errand for his mother, you do it with the thought that “My hands are the hands of Hakadosh Baruch Hu Who gives bread to all the living.”

You can change your day from empty failure to meaningful success with just one minute of Divine focus.

That's pretty encouraging.

Thank you to Toras Avigdor for their permission to use the above & for all their work in publicizing Rav Miller's Torah.

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6 Ways to Counteract Shmutz, Tumah, and Unwanted Consequences (i.e., Din)

16/5/2019

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One alert reader wrote in to point out the correlation between the earthquakes Israel received yesterday and this ridiculous tamei event that is occurring at the same time in Eretz HaKodesh.

To make matters worse, there is the usual absurdity of well-intended yet misguided Jews welcoming a performer who led the way in forging the social acceptance of brazenness, rampant pritzut, gender-morphing, and same-gender-attraction.

In fact, remembering the performer's influence on the society of my youth (and this performer had a MASSIVE influence on American teens and pre-teens), I firmly believe she shares responsibility for the downward spiral of American society and mores today.

Yet she comes off as heroic because she ignores BDS and comes to shmutz up our Land despite their opposition.

This is when I am SO GRATEFUL for a Torah hashkafah and for all the frum Jews who give shiurim and write articles promoting the authentic Torah view.

Simply put: There are some people who make you just want to beg them to boycott you.

"PLEASE capitulate to BDS!" you want to cry out. "Don't have ANYTHING to do with us! PLEASE boycott us! PLEEEEESE!"

We know that this is a Land that vomits out her inhabitants when they get too far from their Torah roots.

We also know that Hashem brings earthquakes for certain sins.

But seeing as no one here is an Israeli government official, what can we do?

What Can YOU Do to Counteract Shmutz & Tumah?

So based on different shiurim I've heard & sources I've read, the following is good advice:

Let Hashem hear your protest.

You don't need to take to the streets. Just standing in your kitchen or waiting at the stoplight in your car, you can say:

"Hashem, I protest this tamei event in Your Precious Land! I totally oppose such tumah shmutzing up the beautiful Inherintance You have so generously bequeathed to us! You don't like it, so I don't like it either!"

(I don't mean you should frighten children or other drivers, but it's very beneficial to find the time to offer up your protest.)

This is especially good because while we need to give the benefit of the doubt (i.e., "They don't know this event is wrong and an awful chilul Hashem"), that never means that the forbidden is permitted or okay. We can say, "These people don't understand, but I do understand. And therefore, I protest on Your Behalf, Hashem. I'm on Your Side."

Say Tehillim.

Any Tehillim. It always sweetens din. The 10 psalms comprising the Tikkun Haklali are wonderful because a tikkun fixes and rectifies things:
Tikkun Haklali in Hebrew

(For an English translation or an English transliteration, press the "abc" at the center-bottom or the "ת-A" at the bottom right.)

Do teshuvah.

Ask yourself how you might have possibly contributed to this chilul Hashem. Do you need to strengthen yourself in tsniut? Shemirat einayim? Separating yourself from non-Jewish values, beliefs, or entertainment?

Any step you take toward cleansing out your own spiritual gunk is really, really powerful and good.

You can even take on a kabalah of not doing something beneath your Torah-infused dignity for the duration of this event.

Everything helps. Don't think that you or your actions are too small or insignificant to matter.

You matter.

Learn more Torah.

This is one of the three pillars of the world, along with prayer and acts of loving-kindness.

And again, even a baby-step in this direction is huge.

Even one more word of Torah is significant.

You and your Torah-learning matter.

Tzedakah

Giving money to the poor or to causes that actually help people (i.e., not the local art museum) sweetens din and because one of the words for money is "damim," which means "blood" in plural form, giving tzedakah is like giving of your life - a wonderful atonement that doesn't harm you and benefits the other.

Say Pitum Haketoret

Found in any Orthodox prayerbook, reciting the procedure of the Pitum Haketoret (The Incense Offering) is a wonderful segulah.

Back in the time of the Beit Hamikdash, this procedure carried out by the Cohen protected Yerushalayim from very bad things.

It was a primary counter-agent against spiritual tumah/contamination. It literally cleansed the environment, both physically and spiritually.

Nowadays, reciting this with as much kavanah as you can releases its original protection.

It also has the power to improve marital harmony, health, and livelihood.

Ideally, it's recited at the beginning of Shacharit (Morning Prayer), at the end of Shacharit, and at the beginning of Mincha (Afternoon Prayer).

If you're not saying it at all, try saying it once in the morning.

If you're already saying it once or twice a day, then for this duration, try saying it 2 or 3 times a day.

If you are already saying it 3 times a day (and if you're a minyan man, then you probably already are), then try adding extra kavanah to it.

For more information (and there is a lot more to know about this), please read:
http://www.jewishmag.co.il/11mag/mystic/mystic.htm

And here you can see a list of the Kli Yakar's symbolism for various aspects & vessels of the Ketoret ceremony (at the beginning of the post):
Parshat Titzaveh

There are other things I'm forgetting, but this is what I've remembered for now.

May Hashem have mercy on us all & may we all return to Him with teshuvah from love.

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Some Good & Comforting News

15/5/2019

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In Tishrei/October of 2018, the Ginsburg family of Beitar Ilit, Eretz Yisrael, lost their youngest daughter and son in a shocking fire, which seems to have been sparked by a night-light falling on a bed, which immediately ignited the bed in a large, fierce blaze.

Their 3 oldest daughters made it out, but were blocked from their siblings by the blaze (although they did call out to them immediately upon seeing the fire, even before they'd left their own beds, but the little ones never woke up).

Within a minute, the room was impossible to enter.

Within 10 minutes, it was impossible to even enter the hall leading to the bedroom, even for fire fighters.

As far as anyone knows, Tzvi z"l & Efrat z"l never woke up.

Their mother took comfort in the fact that their last words were the Bedtime Shema.

Anyway, this hasn't seemed to have spread to the English-language media yet, but the Ginsburgs just had triplets this morning (Wednesday, 10 Iyar): 2 girls & a boy.
http://www.bhol.co.il/news/998549

(UPDATE: This wonderful news is now in English HERE.)

Mazal tov!

(Although there seems to be some question whether it's boy-girl twins or boy-girl-girl triplets. But either way, it's a big bracha.)

And while nothing can replace the irreplaceable children lost in the fire, it is certainly a big nechamah and chessed from Hashem for the Ginsburgs to receive these multiples.

May they have much nachas from all their children and raise them to Torah, chuppah, and maasim tovim.

May we know no more tzarot in Am Yisrael.

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More Astounding Proof that Hashem Really Can Do Anything

14/5/2019

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Following up on a previous post about how Hashem is the Real Influencer & Orchestrator of everything, (including politics & Jew-haters), a book of Rabbi Wein’s most compelling anecdotes, Vintage Wein, presents a sharp story along these lines.

(You can find the original story in full HERE.)

The German-born son of a particularly psychopathic Nazi (a former member of the Death Head Unit--Totenkopfverbände) recoiled from the revelations of his father's atrocities during the Shoah. As a result, he ended up in Eretz Yisrael and started investigating the very people his own father had hunted down to slaughter.

This journey eventually led to his kosher conversion to Judaism and marriage to a fellow German convert.

Together, they were able to have 3 sons in Eretz Yisrael—which was how Rabbi Wein met them, when he noticed this father with 3 particularly well-behaved sons in shul in Eretz Yisrael one day. (That, and they all had a stereotypically Aryan look to them.)

In speaking with this ger tzedek named Avraham, Rabbi Wein heard an astonishing story.

Avraham understandably did not want anything to do with his father, nor did he ever wish to visit Germany again.

Yet at one point, his elderly father was dying and his wife felt it would be a good idea to go visit the elderly father before his death—and also show him his beautiful Jewish grandchildren.

Eventually, she managed to convince her husband and he made the trip with his 3 sons to see their grandfather.

At first, the Nazi grandfather could barely look at the Hebrew-speaking, tzitzit-and-kippah-wearing children.

But gradually, he got used to them.

Interestingly, after they spoke for a while, the Nazi grandfather expressed approval of how things were turning out for them. (Not that anyone needs his approval, but it is pretty shocking.)

Then the son explained the concept of middah k’neged middah (measure for measure) in Judaism.

After explaining that, he asked the former Death Head member if he could think of anything he had done that would explain how (after all the horrors he committed) this former Death Head member merited such a long life (he was over 90 at that time) and to have 3 fine Jewish grandsons.

Because, really, he deserved to have been executed shortly after WWII, like many other Nazi officials, and he certainly did not deserve any Jewish descendants.

The elderly Nazi thought it over, then said something like, "I can't think of anything outstanding, but once, in Frankfurt, when we were rounding up the Jews, I had the chance to save the lives of three Jewish boys who were hiding in a Catholic Orphanage. For some reason they aroused my sympathy. I was touched by their plight; they were so lost and forlorn I felt pity for them, so I let them flee. I don't know what happened to them. But I didn't kill them."

Avraham pondered this for a moment, taking into account the 3 sons he and his wife managed to have, and said that, according to Judaism, that made sense.

No Good Deed Goes Unrewarded

Now…

You can take this as particularly sharp chizuk that Hashem ALWAYS rewards ANY good deed, no matter how evil the deed-doer is.

All the evil deeds in the world cannot nullify the reward earned by the smattering of good deeds.

So yes, this particularly sadistic Nazi merited 3 exceptionally fine Jewish grandsons (likely) middah k’neged middah the 3 Jewish boys upon whom he had mercy. (Probably, there are other metaphysical reasons for this, but just looking at the simplest level, this is a reasonable—if incomplete—conclusion.)

So yes, that is sharp chizuk for us, to encourage us to keep doing good deeds. Many a wise Jewish Sage has pointed out that the reward of the wicked should encourage us, because if that's what they get despite their awfulness, then gosh, think of what we non-wicked can earn!

But there’s another lesson here.

Hashem Can Do ANYTHING

This German grandfather spent the Shoah years murdering Jews in cold blood. Babies, children, men, women, elderly…he hunted them down and slaughtered them while proudly wearing the skull-and-crossbones insignia. The Death Head members ran & staffed the death camps & committed other massacres, like the La Paradis massacre in 1940 France.

Just looking at him in his uniform, you knew exactly who and what he was, and what he did.

And this was his day job, so to speak.

Think about that for a moment. Think about what an unbelievably heartless & evil person he must have been (and still was--let's be honest).

Completely remorseless and unfathomably evil, he felt good about doing such an “important” job for Nazi Germany.

Yet out of all those years of murdering innocents, he unexpectedly pitied 3 Jewish boys in hiding and spared their lives for reasons even he himself could not understand or explain.

And it’s impossible to explain it away by explaining that the Jewish boys’ situation was simply the most pitiable he’d seen.

That can’t be.

He rounded up for slaughter other Jewish children in similar (if not more pitiable) situations.

Did those 3 boys have zechut avot (merits from illustrious ancestors)? Did Hashem have big plans for them or the offspring they would later have? Was someone davening for them? Was it all of these or was it something else entirely?

We can’t know.

But one thing we do know from exhortations and mussar all through Tanach & Chazal is that Hashem can do ANYTHING He wants.

And Hashem can turn the heart of whomever He wants.

And beyond human comprehension, Hashem can even turn the heart of an unfathomably evil blood-thirsty Death Head Jew-hunter—if Hashem wills it.

To me, THAT is the big lesson of the above story.

How can it be that such an evil person, a true Amalekite, someone so consumed with the annihilation of Jews that he continuously & personally perpetrated horrors on innocent people--how can such a person suddenly be "touched" by the "plight" of 3 Jewish boys?

Where could that astounding blip of "sympathy" possibly come from?

Our Beloved Avinu Sheh B'Shamayim

As stated in a previous post, how much & what kind of derech hateva efforts should be made in society and politics needs to be determined by daas Torah.

But the Torah has been telling us for millennia that Jew-hatred is connected to our own avodah. And this mussar is meant for me as much as anyone else.

Wherever we are, we need to turn to our Father in Shamayim, our One True Best Friend, our Yedid Nefesh & Av HaRachaman (Merciful Father) in order to merit the Heavenly Compassion we so desperately need for ourselves and for each other wherever we are.

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How We Should Really be Responding to Our Politicians

12/5/2019

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It’s very easy to get wrapped up in a specific politician and his or her viewpoints (whether for or against).

It’s even easier to get wrapped up in the conventional democratic way of fighting an opponent or political movement you find distressing or even dangerous.

Yet when you have obviously & unabashedly anti-Jewish politicians, it seems a bit silly for Jews (including some frum Jews) to run after purely political solutions.

Needless to say, we are usually expected to make some effort, but it's important for daas Torah to decide how much effort derech hateva Jews should make, while taking other factors into consideration.

Why Politics Do & Don't Matter

And perhaps I’m wrong, but I don’t see that the general population cares much about a politician’s views on Israel.

And I'm not sure how much people care specifically about the Jewish community of their country, especially seeing as Jews tend to get along just fine without anyone else's help and are also such a small (though prominent) minority. I honestly don't think many people are concerned about increasing Jew-hatred in society. They neither feel it nor see it.

They care MUCH more about issues that directly affect them.

For example, who (outside of Jews) feel that America or Britain’s relationship with Israel really affects them or the country?

Many Jews feel that one of the big lessons from the Shoah is to pay a lot more attention to politics, especially if someone says he wants to kill you.

I don’t argue with that, but I simply follow it up with the question: “And then what?”

Why? Because I don’t see that any amount of campaigning and political participation and voting in the “right” people could have turned the tide of Nazism or Communism.

I think that many Jews in democratic countries have grown overconfident.

We’re used to having a voice and feeling equal.

But really, what’s the correct attitude and action to take?

Jew-Hating Protectors

Chazal tells us that the heart of a leader is in Hashem’s Hand.

We’ve seen this throughout history.

Here’s one bizarre example:

At the same time he upheld the savage Inquisition in Spain, King Charles V (1500-1558) provided German Jews with protection.

It makes no sense.

Yet it happened.

Who would have thought that the same king who allowed terrible torture and burning of Jews could also be their protector?

And this is what happened even earlier with King Achashverosh, who hated Jews even more than Haman...yet signed on a decree to prevent their genocide.

The Jew-Friendly President who Blocked the Jews

On the flip side, you have the more positive figure of Republican Calvin Coolidge, who served as the 30th American President during the years 1923-1929.

Coolidge was different than other politicians. Entering the presidency after the particularly corrupt Warren Harding, Coolidge got rid of the corrupt and inept people and hired decent officials in their stead.

In favor of small government, Coolidge cut taxes and lowered government spending.

He granted Native Americans US citizenship and instituted programs to improve conditions on reservations. Contrast him to Teddy Roosevelt (President from 1901 to 1909), who once called them "squalid savages" whose land needed to be "taken by the white race," and shoved them off reservations to give that land to American squatters, tourists, and national forests.

Coolidge defended the rights of black Americans and constantly pressured Congress to pass anti-lynching laws, refusing to appoint any KKK members to office.

He supported the nomination of a black Republican to Congress, shortened the workweek for women and children, increased teacher's salaries, and supported veterans.

As far as Jews go, he also seemed a relatively decent guy.

For example, Coolidge attended the cornerstone-laying of the Jewish Community Center of Washington, D.C. in 1925 and he said some very nice things. He praised Jewish participation in America’s Revolution of Independence, calling Judaism “the faith of liberty” and stating that "Hebraic mortar cemented the foundations of American democracy."

During the speech he included Jews in his opinion that when people have the freedom “to find the places for which they are best fitted…the vast multitude will rise to a higher level, to wider horizons, to worthier attainments."(1)

When unable to attend the Convention of the Zionist Organization in 1924, Coolidge extended his regrets for not coming and his good wishes to the attendees, then wrote:
“I have so many times reiterated my interest in this great movement that anything which I might say would be a repetition of former statements, but I am nevertheless glad to have this opportunity to express again my sympathy with that deep and intense longing which finds such fine expression in the Jewish National Homeland in Palestine.” (2)

Regarding a book of Jewish thought by England’s Chief Rabbi sent to Coolidge by an American Jew in 1923, Coolidge responded with a thank-you note which he included the following:
“…I can see that it will prove of interest and value.” (3)

So he seemed to appreciate Jews and seemed as pro-Israel as an American president could be without there actually being a State of Israel.

And I’ve never found any anti-Jewish statements by him.

Yet it was this pro-Israel, Jewishly appreciative President who put the cap on Jewish immigration to America when he signed the 1924 Immigration Restriction Act.

Based on testimony by the Eugenics(!) Head Office to Congress, this new law designated that 86% of immigrants come from Western & Northern Europe, while Southern & Eastern European immigrants could make up only 9% of total immigrants.

Nine years before the evil fuehrer came to power in Germany, this law became the reason why Jews had such a hard time escaping Europe during the Nazi era.

Who Really Decides If It's Good for the Jews?

But despite a lot of anti-Jewish sentiment in the upper echelons of America, American Jews prospered, moving from the sweatshops and tenements to better jobs and nicer homes. Their children attended (and excelled in) public schools, got together in soda shops, and went to the movies on the weekend.

Just like all the other middle-class Americans.

While I oppose Jewish assimilation into American society, my point is that whether the non-Jewish ruling elite likes Jews or hates them, Hashem decides how Jews are affected by this.

Jews thrived in America, whether the government despised them or not.

Sympathetic non-Jewish rulers have sometimes proved powerless while Jew-haters sometimes provide the protection and freedom Jews need to flourish.

To truly affect our politicians positively, we need to turn to Hashem for our salvation.

He is the one who can make a sympathetic leader callous…

…or make a Jew-hater an ally & protector.

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The Big Lie in Social Pseudo-Science Today

9/5/2019

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The primary reason why physically intimate relationships between the same gender is wrong is because the Torah clearly states that it’s wrong. Hashem despises such relationships.

Furthermore, if you study the deeper significance of a marital relationship between husband & wife (on all levels: spiritual, emotional, physical, etc.), you understand more why a same-gender relationship is so incredibly corruptive and destructive.

Such people are seriously hurting themselves, in addition to their society, and cause harm in unseen spiritual realms.

One of the strongest weapons used against the proponents of traditional marriage is the idea that same-gender attraction is “normal.” They claim it’s innate and cannot be changed.

If you even suggest that one’s orientation can change, you will be subjected to disdain and vitriol.

And it has even became a human rights issue.

Human Rights Abuse, Eh? Hmm...

Human rights usually deal with truly horrific things, like child trafficking, slavery, long-term internment in terrible prisons for non-crimes, torture, concentration camps, genocide, and more.

With regard to same-gender attraction—particularly among males—it is all about taavah.

It’s just about being able to act on your taavah.

Sure, some of them will start blabbing on about “love,” but the kind of lifelong monogamous relationship (marriage) that regular men and women seek under the auspice of love does not exist in the male toeva community.

(Statistics show that they are incapable of both a long-term relationship AND a monogamous one. For example, a fully monogamous 20-year relationship is barely found among these men—yet a fully monogamous 20+-year relationship is the norm among husbands & wives.)

So it’s basically as if human rights organizations battled for, say, the right to engage in copious, indiscriminate relationships with redheads—as if NOT being allowed to do that is equal to slaving to death for years in a diamond mine in Africa.

Despite the obvious ridiculousness, “expert” sources oppose the very idea of what’s known as “reparative therapy” or “conversion therapy.” One human rights organization defines such therapy as “a range of dangerous and discredited practices.”

Dangerous, eh?

This community has an abnormally high rate of violence, disease, criminal activity against children, addiction, and a shorter lifespan…yet trying to re-orient their attraction—THAT’S what’s “dangerous”?

Seriously?

Biased Science

The DSM no longer considers same-gender attraction something that needs to be (or can be) re-oriented.

Both the American Psychological Association and the American Counselors Association question the ethics of re-orienting a person’s attraction even if the client requests it.

Not only that, these organizations advise therapists to actively inform a client that such therapy has not been shown to work and can even be harmful.

It is hard to see how attempted therapy can be MORE harmful than a toeva lifestyle, but there are your “experts” for you.

The American Psychiatric Association, the American Psychological Association, the American Association of Social Workers, and the American Academy of Pediatrics joined together years ago to oppose reparative therapy.

A professor of psychology at the University of California-Davis even stated the following:
“And even if conversion therapies were shown to be successful in more than a relative handful of cases, they would remain ethically questionable.”

See? Even if there is a method to successfully change orientation, it is still “ethically questionable,” according to these people.

If you read the actual article, it’s full of gobbledygook that you have to sift through to find the actual information.

It’s impossible to enter into a rational discussion when the “experts” themselves are so dead-set against the possibility of re-orientation.

What is the Overall Effectiveness of Treatment, Anyway?

Part of the problem is that therapy for anything is overrated.

Most divorced couples participated in marriage therapy, yet divorced anyway.

Child psychologist John Rosemond has claimed many times that talk therapy does not help children, and can even make their behavior worse. He cites decades of observation to back up his opinion.

Also, the people you’ve known who’ve gone through therapy, what are they like?

The ones I’ve known still have problems (sometimes even serious problems) with emotional immaturity (including one who claimed that therapy helped her emotionally mature so much more), narcissism, and general bad middot.

They may not be worse than everyone else, but they don't seem better either.

More significantly, they don't seem better (or much better) than they were before they entered therapy.

Meaning, whether you compare them to others or to themselves, there is often a lack of notable improvement.

And despite so many people digging in their heels to say that people can’t change their orientation, the fact is that people definitely do—and some do even without any therapy or treatment whatsoever.

Re-Orientation Story #1

For example, a 27-year-old British man (who’d “come out” at the age of 14 with his attraction to men, never had a relationship with a woman, had indulged with over 150 partners, and worked in a service catering to male-male taavah) decided to abstain from any physical relationships for a year.

Dominic Hilton made this decision after reading accounts of how abstinence helped people increase their self-esteem and energy, lessen anxiety, and generally helped them get to know themselves better.

To his shock, he found himself increasingly attracted to women over the course of that year.

His final realization hit when, during a vacation in Spain with a male friend, his friend tried to engage Hilton in Hilton’s usual chitchat about what guys around are attractive.

But “I just couldn’t join in,” said Hilton. “…I just don’t find men attractive anymore.”

Hilton also described how his fashion and mannerisms have changed. He no longer feels comfortable in “camp” styles and makeup, preferring instead tracksuits and less quasi-feminine expressions and behaviors.

Originally, appearing in the UK Mirror, you can find the above article HERE.

Re-Orientation Story #2

Robert Oscar Lopez opened up on his blog and American Thinker (How to Survive a Character Assassination) regarding his own “conversion.”

Raised by a toeva parent & exclusively involved with other males since age 13, Lopez states that he “identified completely” with toeva and sank into a toeva lifestyle that also consisted of self-destructive behavior, abusive relationships, and drugs.

Upon intimacy with a woman for the first time at age 28, Lopez woke to the fact that his former lifestyle actually wasn’t okay. (Part of his thunderbolt insight had to do with the fact that the act could lead to fatherhood.) He married that woman, found God (kind of), and went on to lead a fulfilling life.

Interestingly, he says that premarital intimacy with a woman, looking at untsnius pictures of women (often part of reparative therapy), and other unwholesome behaviors is actually NOT ultimately helpful to re-orienting one’s attraction.

He regrets that he himself did so and wishes that he’d married his wife straightaway, having relations only after their marriage.

(So this might be one problem with conventional reparative therapy, in that it often encourages unwholesome behavior in the opposite direction, rather than healing the person’s soul.)

Working as an English instructor at California State University-Northridge, Lopez ended up being viciously & unrelentingly harassed for 7 years by both his prestigious degreed colleagues and his students. Why? Because he came out as a formerly toeva-oriented person who’d changed and was now happily married.

Even “worse,” he detailed his childhood suffering as the child of a toeva parent.

Unfortunately, the mere listening to an honest description of his childhood experiences (by those who don't want to hear it) is forbidden under a Californian discrimination law, which seeks to protect ostriches with their head in the sand from hearing things that they don’t want to hear.

You aren't Defined by Your Flaws

The final problem with any discussion of this issue is the non-Jewish attitude toward mistakes, stumbles, fails, and falls.

It’s all black-and-white with no acknowledgement of Hashem’s Hand in things.

For example, alcoholism is often considered a “disease” that progresses even if you stop drinking. You are supposed to consider yourself an alcoholic for the rest of your life, even if you abstain completely from any alcohol.

If, say, you stumble and get drunk once after 10 years of sobriety, that is considered evidence that you are “still” an alcoholic.

The same is true with regard to drugs and food and anything else considered an addiction.

In secular society, you are defined by your addictions. You are defined by your negative traits and your taavahs.

Likewise, if a man formerly attracted to men ever finds himself looking at unwholesome images of men or even in a fling with another man, then he is considered to still “really” be attracted to men.

Liberals especially love this black-and-white idea because they feel it “proves” that reparative therapy (or whatever inspired the man to re-orient his attraction) doesn’t really work and it seals in their own mind their mantra that orientation cannot be changed.

(Note: All the anti-Torah social science mentioned in this post is highly reminiscent of the fake science characteristic of murderously totalitarian societies. Please see related links below for more.)

What a Fail REALLY Means

As written about on this blog before, this is one of the very damaging beliefs in Western society, that you are defined by your negative qualities rather than your positive ones.

This false belief insists that your negative traits are the “real” you, when in reality, your positive traits are the real you.

Judaism informs us that failing challenges or stumbling into sin can actually be a yeridah for the sake of aliyah—sort of like hitting rock bottom in order to bounce back up as far away from rock bottom as possible, which propels you even higher than before.

Sometimes, these fails & falls occur to keep you humble.

Though underrated in society, Hashem cannot stand to be with prideful or haughty person. He can actually be closest to you in your remorse and pain over your fall. (Breslov chassidus goes into this whole concept quite a lot.)

Anyway, the point is that we all have traits & taavahs with which we were either born or developed from our environment, and we are supposed to work on overcoming these traits and taavahs.

We aren’t supposed to indulge them or give up on them.

And we certainly aren't supposed to be defined by them.

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Standing against Chilul Hashem

8/5/2019

6 Comments

On Friday night, a New York Jewish Democrat councilman collapsed in a movie theater. By Sunday, his death was confirmed.

As the media swoons over the “loss,” it quickly becomes clear that they cherish him most for his work on behalf of toeva.

This councilman served in a district home to a large & thriving frum community, along with other Americans who initially weren’t so gung-ho for toeva rights & acceptance.

But this “progressive” councilman propelled that cultural descent before his constituents wanted it. (And many still don’t want it.)

They Don't Need that Kind of Advocacy

Starry-eyed groupies particularly swoon over the councilman’s “advocacy” for the "runaway youth," portrayed as boys attracted to their own gender who didn’t find acceptance in their communities of origin, so they came to live on the streets of Brooklyn. The councilman got funding for shelters and extra beds for these guys.

Needless to say, I don’t completely buy this because organizations, hotlines, and other forms of support existed for such youth way before the councilman started working on their behalf in 2001.

As described before on this blog, the vast majority of males attracted to their own gender were either violated by a man at some point or lacked the kind of affection they needed from their father (especially true of those with scary or neglectful or absentee fathers) and therefore seek a warped version of it from other men.

Popping the Leftist Bubble

Basically, such youth need genuine compassion, focused on treatment and re-orientation, not further indulgence of a damaging lifestyle.

They don’t need to run away and live on the streets of New York. And they need a lot more than beds in a shelter.

Furthermore, males involved with other males, particularly when its many other males (as is common in this community) have a significantly higher rate of an incurable 100% fatal disease—not something you want to encourage in your community.

Men attracted to their own gender also abuse children far out of proportion to their numbers. For example, while less than 3% of Americans identify as attracted to their own gender, men attracted to their own gender are 11 times MORE likely to violate a child. (Please see https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1556756 and a Harvard study, both of which clearly describe the evidence even as they tell you not to believe it!)

They abuse drugs and alcohol out of proportion to their numbers.

Their relationships also tend to be the most violent, surpassing the rate of physical abuse within a relationship for female-female relationships and male-female relationships.

Why would you want this increased in your community?

A Vote for Him is a Vote for Sedom

Finally, and most importantly, the Torah categorically forbids toeva relationships, whether for Jews or non-Jews.

Chazal already stated centuries ago that one of the main reasons why Hashem destroyed Sedom was because they enacted marital contracts for toeva.

Once toeva becomes officially sanctioned, that signifies the end for such a society. Anyone who cares about the society in which they live must oppose legislation that validates toeva lifestyles and behaviors.

Hashem is very Patient and Forebearing with mistakes for all kinds of sins. He gives us a wealth of opportunities to do teshuvah. But once a sin is enacted as a perfectly acceptable norm and protected (or even encouraged) by law—particularly such a severe transgression—then that society is doomed.

(Just to contrast: Certain forms of slander are prohibited by American law. If outright baseless character defamation and completely false slander were not only protected by law, but encouraged and celebrated as a “right,” then the culture would become intolerable. And yes, America is heading in that direction too.)

Yet this councilman made himself an advocate and activist on behalf of toeva legislation.

Hiding behind the Charity Facade

Furthermore, his generosity is suspect, as is the case for reshaim.

(We don’t give them the benefit of the doubt; we do the opposite: We suspect their motives even when they do good things.)

The councilman’s non-profit for the toeva street youth earned nice bonuses for him and his cronies (all of whom were already earning 6-figure salaries), in addition to providing deluxe salaries for the people hired to sit on the board of the non-profit—the cronies’ wives.

Coincidence? Hmm…

I’ve long noticed that indecent people will do some large act of charity to make themselves look and feel good, plus it’s used a shield against those who see their true colors and wish to unmask them.

“But I did this really amazing act of charity, so you can’t say I’m a bad person!” they howl.

Yeah, I’ve seen this personally and not just in politics.

I bet most of us have seen this dynamic.

Can We Please Get Off the Insidious "Pro-Israel" Bandwagon?

It's very common for Jews to jump on the bandwagon of a completely repulsive fellow Jew simply because he supports the State of Israel, the IDF, or opposes BDS.

This is a huge mistake.

As someone once explained to me, morally indecent people feel attracted to modern Medinat Yisrael because their moral laxity is acceptable there.

That is not true for anywhere else in the Middle East.

The modern state of Israel would be even more secular had not the religious Jews intervened with all their might.

Also, even the most rebellious Jews are aware that Jew-hatred affects them too, and they relish having a theoretical place to which they can escape, if necessary. (i.e., "If America doesn't work out, I can always go to Israel as my Plan B!")

So their support for Israel tends to be wholly self-serving and based on their perception of Israel as a place where they can indulge their anti-Torah lifestyles.

This is a terrible mistake because as is written, Eretz Yisrael is a Land that "vomits out" those who desecrate her.

Yet the desecration acceptable among secular Leftists in Eretz Yisrael is exactly what these anti-Torah Jews like about it.

This councilman fought with BDS. So what? BDS flourishes BECAUSE of Jews like this.

(Hashem brings Jew-hatred to the world when Jews hate themselves--meaning, the Torah, which defines Judaism.)

Then, despite all the adulation surrounding the death of this person who, though identifiably Jewish, clearly felt compelled to catch a movie on Lail Shabbat, his behavior toward a fellow (and far better) Jewish competitor crossed the line.

Strafing Storobin

When Russian-born Republican David Storobin chose to run against the recently deceased councilman, it was a breath of fresh air for decent people.

As a child, Storobin came with his divorced mother from Belarus. His extended family had been physically decimated by the Nazis, then spiritually attacked by the Communists.

But coming to America, Storobin reconnected with his Jewish heritage and also worked his way up through law school, opening his own firm at the age of 25: a hard-won one-room office.

Actually, that was his second office. His first was not actually even his; a friend allowed him to work out of the friend's office.

But Storobin applied all his grit and became very successful.

This is a real self-made man, and not like all the politicians who had tons of help (yet claim to be self-made).

I have no clue as to Storobin’s personal observance, but he belonged to an Orthodox shul in Brighton Beach and promoted traditional marriage only, pro-life, the development of small businesses, and school vouchers—all of which benefit both the frum community and the community at large.

But the now-deceased Democrat councilman wasn’t having any of that.

In a shocking attack, he accused Storobin of “ties to skinheads and neo-Nazi groups and white supremacist groups.”

Whoa, quite a mouthful there!

It takes quite a lot of ego and callousness to accuse a fellow Jew, whose family was victimized by Nazis, of having ties to Nazis.

But anything to take down the competition, eh?

Fortunately, people rallied to Storobin’s defense, notably Storobin’s rabbi and the chairman of Agudath Yisrael.

Yet the idea had been planted and that district hosts a large minority population for whom “white supremacist” is a high-voltage word, and is anyway associated with “Republican” in the mind of American liberals.

Storobin won by a sliver.

Just Say No to Chilul Hashem

Other evidence exists of the deceased councilman’s greed & cronyism. But he was most known for his advocacy on behalf of toeva.

Yet this renegade Jew, known for his chilul Hashem (chilul Shabbat too, apparently) managed to achieve accolades by virtue of a natural charisma (please see Mishlei 11-9: The Absolutely Charming Path to Destruction as to why morally repugnant people are often found attractive) and Liberal politicking gusto.

This post came about at the request of a pained reader--who saw this councilman lauded & mourned in a frum newspaper! (He didn’t say which one.)

We can’t allow this.

Even if we find someone personally appealing, we cannot ignore his trampling of Torah values.

And it is wrong to paint a chilul Hashem as a kiddush Hashem.

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The Pre-Mashiach Jewish Reality: Stuck between a Rock & Hard Place

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Stay Out of It

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The Waste of Obsessive Thoughts

Change Your Day from Success to Failure with 1 Minute

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No Good Deed Goes Unrewarded

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Our Beloved Avinu Sheh B'Shamayim

Why Politics Do & Don't Matter

Jew-Hating Protectors

The Jew-Friendly President who Blocked the Jews

Who Really Decides If It's Good for the Jews?

Human Rights Abuse, Eh? Hmm...

Biased Science

What is the Overall Effectiveness of Treatment, Anyway?

Re-Orientation Story #1

Re-Orientation Story #2

You aren't Defined by Your Flaws

What a Fail REALLY Means

They Don't Need that Kind of Advocacy

Popping the Leftist Bubble

A Vote for Him is a Vote for Sedom

Hiding behind the Charity Facade

Can We Please Get Off the Insidious "Pro-Israel" Bandwagon?

Strafing Storobin

Just Say No to Chilul Hashem

Myrtle Rising

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