"Instead of stinging nettle, myrtle will rise" (Isaiah 55:13)
 "Instead of evil, good will rise." (The Malbim's Interpretation)
Myrtle Rising
  • Blog
  • Comments Disabled
    • Privacy Policy
  • Aliyah
    • Mini-Intro
    • General Cultural Insights
    • School Tips
  • Kli Yakar Index
  • Most Popular
  • Contact

14 Ways to Sweeten Dinim

11/8/2016

2 Comments

 
PictureWe want the dinim to look like this.
Needless to say, it's always good to sweeten dinim.
 
Often translated as "judgements," dinim are actually the natural spiritual consequences of one's deeds & thoughts.

Of course, these spiritual consequences are often experienced physically, i.e. illness, financial loss, etc.  
 
With Tisha B'Av upon us and then dealing with the rest of Av and its Lion mazal, and then sliding into Elul, this is a particularly important time to sweeten any harsh stuff hanging overhead, whether on a personal level or the national level—or both.
 
I am still not Breslov, but I've been going through Sefer Hamiddot (you can download a free PDF of it here) and found the chapter on Sweetening Judgement/Hamtakat Hadinim particularly helpful:
 
  1. Recite Tikkun Chatzot.
  2. "When you stay awake the whole night, by this you are saved from dinim." (This is something comforting for parents of wakeful or colicky--chas v'shalom!—children to keep in mind.)
  3. Learning the mishnayot of Zeraim sweetens dinim.
  4. Tzedakah transforms dinim into chessed (loving-kindness).
  5. Reciting Tehillim 39 and 77 sweetens dinim.
  6. To battle the decrees of the nations against the Jewish people, recite Tehillim 62.
  7. "Through bitachon [trust in Hashem], the din is sweetened & chessed is drawn forth."
  8. Crying [not in accusation or self-pity against Hashem] sweetens dinim.
  9. Being depressed draws forth bad mazal. Via bad mazal, the attribute of harsh din dominates. [So try to fight depression by expressing gratitude for whatever you can.]
  10. "One who wants to sweeten dinim should not drink any wine the entire day."
  11. When you hear someone making accusations against the Jewish people, you should toil to find a meritorious reason behind the criticized actions.
  12. Immersing in a mikveh annuls suffering and brings salvation.
  13. One who accepts suffering with love is as if he (or she!) brought a sacrifice. [Bringing a sacrifice to the Beit Hamikdash sweetened dinim. The Kli Yakar in Parshat Tzav explains how that works.]
  14. When a person sees that dinim rest upon him, he should tell of those who hate him and justify them. [To me, "tell" implies telling Hashem and not other people, as that would be lashon hara. But may I'm misunderstanding something...]
 
Now, that last one is interesting.


JUSTIFYING Your HATERS??!!

Contrary to certain stereotypes, we know that Judaism does not encourage masochism or codependency.

Justifying those who hate you should not lead to: "I deserve to be punished and abused because deep down inside, I am innately very bad and icky."

And contrary to what you sometimes hear in some classes, halachically forbidden behavior (i.e. hating you unless you are completely and intentionally evil) is never "okay" or acceptable or excusable.
 
Just for knowing, the Hebrew word translated here as "justify" is יצדיק, the root meaning "right" or "just."

If I understand it correctly, it's very similar to thanking Hashem for suffering.

Even if you can't emotionally appreciate your suffering, it's possible to intellectually accept that it is somehow for your benefit in a way that only Hashem understands.
 
Basically, you are just seeing the other person's point of view.
 
For example, did you once do something that gave someone else the totally wrong impression of you and they just can't let go of it?

Even if they're wrong and should really give you the benefit of the doubt, can you at least understand intellectually and objectively why they
feel the way they do?
 
Or maybe you really did do something wrong and the other person just can't forgive you
--even though you sincerely apologized and tried to make it up to them.

While they're wrong not to forgive, can you understand why they can't?

Given their background, their experiences, their blind spots and stumbling blocks, and their personality, can you somehow "justify" their feelings about you?
 
Or you might discover that you actually did do something wrong, and this grants you the opportunity to make amends for and rectify it.

Doing all this should not lead to depression or self-hatred.
 
Remember the paradox of us having free choice while Hashem is still deciding every last little detail of our lives and actions.
 
Whether you did something to create a hater or if someone hates you for no reason (or for the wrong reason), that's also from Hashem.

It seems that this exercise is not about the other person, per se, but about Hashem.

 
I think it's hard and uncomfortable to do at first, but difficult and uncomfortable acts are usually the most powerful.

My Personal Experience with Justifying My Haters

PictureIt looked kind of like this cat.
​I do not know how the following will sound to you, but the first time I tried this, a young cat suddenly entered my little yard just as I finished justifying my haters.

​In Perek Shira, the song of the cat is:

“I have pursued my enemies and overtaken them, and I did not return until they were destroyed.” (Tehillim 18:38)
 
That sounds pretty sweet to me!
 
I felt sure this was a sign that justifying my haters had worked.
 
Then the seat of my chair collapsed and I fell through and got stuck.
 
Fortunately, my then-13-year-old was around and he held out his arm to let me grab hold of him while using a pear tree for leverage as the chair's legs collapsed, too.

I'm sure you'll be relieved to hear I made it out okay.

Thank God for bar mitzvah boys! (And conveniently located pear trees!)

Anyway, perhaps Hashem transferred the harsh dinim to my chair and it was all a kaparah (atonement).

(For more information on dealing with Av's Lion mazal, please see the Kli Yakar on Parshat Devarim)
 
May Hashem greatly sweeten ALL our dinim, both our individual dinim and our National dinim.  

Picture
We'd like Hashem to do this to our dinim.
2 Comments
Devora
9/12/2018 12:35:28

Thank you so much for posting all of this. I was hoping to get to the kever of the Chidah so it will be great to have all of these tefilot at hand.

Many blessings!!

Reply
Myrtle Rising
9/12/2018 12:59:45

Baruch Hashem, thanks for your tefillot & all your other efforts, Devora. Every Jew's tefillot help so much & we all benefit whether we realize it or not. Hatzlacha on getting to the kever of the Chidah!

Reply

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Privacy Policy

    Picture
    Please note this is an affiliate link. Meaning, I get a small cut but at NO extra cost to you. If you use it, I'm grateful. If not, you still get a giant mitzvah connected to Eretz Yisrael.


    Feedburner subscription no longer in operation. Sorry!

    Myrtle Rising

    I'm a middle-aged housewife and mother in Eretz Yisrael who likes to read and write a lot.


    Picture
    Sample Chapters

    Categories

    All
    Aliyah
    Anti Jewish Bigotry
    Anti-jewish-bigotry
    Astronomy
    Book Review
    Books
    Chagim/Holidays
    Chinuch
    Coronavirus
    Dictionaries
    Emuna
    Eretz Yisrael
    Erev Rav
    Gender
    Hitbodedut
    "If The Torah..."
    Jewish Astrology
    Kav Hayashar
    Kli Yakar
    Lashon Hara
    Love
    Me'am Loez
    Minchat Yehudah
    Mishlei/Proverbs
    Netivot Shalom
    Parenting
    Parsha
    Pele Yoetz
    Perek Shira
    Pesach
    Politics
    Prayer
    Purim
    Rav Avigdor Miller
    Rav Itamar Schwartz
    Rav L.Y. Bender
    Recipes
    "Regular" Jews
    Rosh Hashanah
    Society
    Sukkot
    Tammuz
    Technology
    Tehillim/Psalms
    Teshuvah
    The Lost Princess
    Tisha B'Av
    USA Scary Direction
    Women
    Yom Kippur

    Jewish Blogs

    Daf Yomi Review
    Derech Emet
    Going...Habayitah
    Halacha Q&A
    Hava haAharona
    Miriam Adahan
    My Perspective

    Shirat Devorah
    Tomer Devorah
    Toras Avigdor
    True Tzaddikim
    Tznius Blog

    Yeranen Yaakov
    Rabbi Ofer Erez (Hebrew lectures)

    Jewish Current Events

    Hamodia
    Sultan Knish
    Tomer Devorah
    Yeranen Yaakov

    Jewish Health

    People Smarts

    Archives

    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015

    RSS Feed

    Copyright Notice

    ©2015-2022 Myrtle Rising
    Excerpts and links may be used without express permission as long as a link is provided back to the appropriate Myrtle Rising page.

Home/Blog

Most Popular

Kli Yakar in English

Aliyah

Contact

Copyright © 2023
Photos used under Creative Commons from Brett Jordan, BAMCorp, Terrazzo, Abode of Chaos, Michele Dorsey Walfred, marklordphotography, M.Burak Erbaş, torbakhopper, jhritz, Rina Pitucci (Tilling 67), Svadilfari, kum111, Tim simpson1, FindYourSearch, Giorgio Galeotti, ChrisYunker, Jaykhuang, YourCastlesDecor, bluebirdsandteapots, Natalia Medd, Stefans02, Israel_photo_gallery, Commander, U.S. 7th Fleet, BradPerkins, zeevveez, dfarrell07, h.koppdelaney, Edgardo W. Olivera, nafrenkel88, zeevveez, mtchlra, Liz | populational, TraumaAndDissociation, thinboyfatter, garofalo.christina, skpy, Free Grunge Textures - www.freestock.ca, Nerru, Gregory "Slobirdr" Smith, trendingtopics, dolbinator1000, DonkeyHotey, zeevveez, erix!, zeevveez, h.koppdelaney, MAURO CATEB, kevin dooley, keepitsurreal, annikaleigh, bjornmeansbear, publicdomainphotography, Leonard J Matthews, Exile on Ontario St, Nicholas_T, marcoverch, planman, PhilWolff, j_lai, t.kunikuni, zeevveez, Ian W Scott, Brett Jordan, RonAlmog, Bob Linsdell, NASA Goddard Photo and Video, aaron_anderer, ** RCB **, Tony Webster, mypubliclands, AntonStetner, Zachi Evenor, MrJamesBaker, sammydavisdog, Frode Ramone, Wonder woman0731, wrachele, kennethkonica, Skall_Edit, Pleuntje, Rennett Stowe, *S A N D E E P*, symphony of love, AlexanderJonesi, Arya Ziai, ePublicist, Enokson, Tony Webster, Art4TheGlryOfGod, seaternity, Andrew Tarvin, zeevveez, Israel_photo_gallery, Iqbal Osman1, Matt From London, Tribes of the World, Eric Kilby, miracle design, RonAlmog, slgckgc, Kim Scarborough, DonkeyHotey, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, h.koppdelaney, gleonhard, Pedro Travassos, nociveglia, RonAlmog, Israel_photo_gallery, Septemia, Paulann_Egelhoff, Tatiana12, MAD Hippies Life, Neta Bartal, milesgehm, shooting brooklyn, RonAlmog, smilygrl, gospelportals, leighblackall, symensphotographie, zeevveez, Kyknoord, wotashot (taking a break), Tambako the Jaguar, bitmask, Arnie Sacknooson, mattymatt, Rob Swystun, zeevveez, Dun.can, Tim Patterson, timeflicks, garlandcannon, HRYMX, fred_v, Yair Aronshtam, zeevveez, Ron Cogswell, FindYourSearch, Israel_photo_gallery, Serendipity Diamonds, zeevveez, Steve Corey, Dominic's pics, leighklotz, Stefans02, dannyman, RonAlmog, Stephen O, RonAlmog, Tips For Travellers, Futurilla, anomalous4, Bob Linsdell, AndyMcLemore, symphony of love, andydr, sara~, Gamma Man, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, robef, European Southern Observatory, Brett Jordan, Johnny Silvercloud, Israel_photo_gallery, smkybear, --Sam--, Paulann_Egelhoff, Selena Sheridan, D'oh Boy, campbelj45ca, 19melissa68, entirelysubjective, Leimenide, dheera.net, Brett Jordan, HonestReporting.com, Iqbal Osman1, One Way Stock, Jake Waage, picto:graphic, Marcelo Alves, KAZVorpal, Sparkle Motion, Brett Jordan, Ambernectar 13, Howdy, I'm H. Michael Karshis, Steven DuBois, Cristian V., tortuga767, Jake Cvnningham, D'oh Boy, Eric Kilby, quinn.anya, Lenny K Photography, One Way Stock, Bird Eye, ell brown, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, Kevin M. Gill, lunar caustic, gerrybuckel, quinn.anya, Kaz Andrew, kodomut, kayugee, jintae kim's photography, Futurilla, terri_bateman, Patty Mooney, Amydeanne, Paulann_Egelhoff, Mulling it Over, Ungry Young Man, Ruth and Dave, yangouyang374, symphony of love, kennethkonica, young@art, Brett Jordan, slgckgc, Celestine Chua, rkimpeljr, Kristoffer Trolle, TooFarNorth, D'oh Boy, Grace to You, LittleStuff.me, Kevin M. Gill, philozopher, traveltipy.com, Alan Cleaver, crazyoctopus, d_vdm, tonynetone, penjelly, TheToch, JohnE777, hello-julie, DaveBleasdale, Michael Candelori Photography, andessurvivor, slgckgc, byzantiumbooks, sasha diamanti