More and more, I've come to realize that being a Jew who keeps Torah and mitzvot is like living in another dimension within a dimension.

If you've been making a real effort to come close to Hashem (however clumsily) and to internalize Torah values, it colors everything you see.

It colors it with Truth.

You end up living in a dimension rich with the most beautiful colors, but this multi-hued dimension exists within a dimension comprised of varying shades of gray blah.

And you increasingly see things (including yourself) as they really are.

Mostly, it's a beautiful and enriching experience that calls for a lot of gratitude.

But when someone from the outer gray dimension makes contact and does so with the desire to invade your dimension with their depressing gray tints, accompanied by resistance to your pouring some of your colorful stuff back into their blah dimension, it just becomes an unwanted and irritating experience.

For example, I recently got an email from someone who is not Jewish, but thinks they are. The email mourned the fact that a local and identifiably Jewish institution, along with many other such institutions around the country, has now received a terrorist threat.

And I knew what was coming and what the mournful tone disguised.

So guess who my contact blamed? Trump and Pence.

(Yeah, Pence, who recently cleaned up a Jewish cemetery after an antisemitic hit.)

Never mind the facts, like how antisemitism saw its upswing during Obama's years.

Never mind that it was Obama's administration that allowed so many Jew-haters into the country.

Never mind the spiritual message that, as the End approaches, Hashem would like some more teshuvah from His beloved Nation (and for certain non-Jews, including fake converts - however innocent and well-intentioned - and smarmy evangelicals, to stop mucking around).

I would have liked to explain that it's not Trump's policies that lead to antisemitism, it is the psychotically knee-jerk opposition to Trump's policies that emboldens Jew-haters.

But I didn't bother.

There are different kinds of Jew-haters.

White supremacists, for example, see the anti-white racism and anti-male bigotry in the wake of anything Trump does or says, and they conclude that the anti-white racism, the politically correct censorship, and "reverse" chauvinism built up under Obama won't go away without their nasty "help."

And then there are the Jew-haters in the Arab world. Over the years, I learned the hard way that it is impossible to explain Arab mentality to American liberals. They don't want to hear that different value systems genuinely exist, or that someone of the opposite perception may honestly believe in their perception as the emesdikker emes (the truest Truth) as much as the liberal believes in his or her perception as the emesdikker emes. 

And the truth is that if American society (or at least its media) presented a united front with their President while coming down hard on ANYBODY (regardless of race, gender, citizenship, etc.) who don't toe the line of law in America, terrorists would leave Americans alone. (It would have been better, however, if Obama's people hadn't let them and their nasty preachers in the first place.) With years of clan violence under their belts, Islamofacists are experts at spotting a breach and then exploiting it.

And in part, that's what's happening.

Of course, you can (and should) criticize a President's policies if they're bad. But as far as a big part of the Arab world goes, this media-driven free-for-all against the President (even when he's right) is the same as waving a fresh juicy carcass in front of a ravenous panther.

And I'm saying this as someone who is not pro-Trump (although I'm enjoying his presidency so far) and thinks that he ultimately will not do the right thing by Eretz Israel.

When I hear of Jews being hurt, I think I need to daven more and take on more mitzvot.

In other words, I need to do some soul-searching.

But I also think that the person who emailed me needs to do some soul-searching.

• Being a Noachide is fine.
• Being a Torah-observant Jew is fine.

But being a fake Jew who marries a real Jew and then raises their children as fake Jews who might marry real Jews? In other words, increasing intermarriage under false pretenses and totally misrepresenting Torah Truth?
Not okay.
Really, horribly, tragically not okay.

But I can't say anything, neither politically nor spiritually.

Liberals tend to be political evangelicals. They tell you what you need to think. They aren't interested in hearing the other side. To deceive you, they approach you in an amicable manner and open a dialogue with you by asking questions.
But it's all in order to convert you to their distorted theology.

Conservatives can do this, too, of course. The difference is that:
A) The conservative position is usually the correct one and can be proven so.
B) Because everything in society and the media is vociferously against conservative values, conservatives are usually well-informed of the opposing opinions and not speaking from a place of total and complete ignorance.

Anyway, I know that anything I say in reply will simply not be heard.

I know I'll just be knocked with kindergarten-level talking points that show no real knowledge or understanding of the subject and have nothing to do with whatever I just said.

And so I just press "Delete."

And I also find myself speechless in gratitude and amazement that Hashem plucked me out of all that mind-altering Leftist muck and put me in a place where my soul has at least a fighting chance.

(And thank you very much to all of you fine frum Jews - whether FFB or BT or converts - who've used your hearts, homes, words, and deeds - whether big or small - so that people like me could make this journey in the first place.)

Originally appeared in the Hebrew-language Kol Hayehudi online newspaper HERE.
(Thank you very much to Neshama at Going Home...to Yerushalayim, both for posting this herself and for taking the thought and effort to make sure I saw it.)

Here the Kol Hayehudi article in English:
(Since it's my translation, any errors are also mine.)

*Farbrengen is a Chabad/Lubavitch tradition in which like-minded people gather together to inspire each other toward spiritual advancement.
(In Hebrew, a farbrengen is called a hitva’adut.)
Chassidic melodies are sung, Torah and Chassidus are discussed within in the context of personal character development. Participants are supposed to discuss and pinpoint character flaws along with suggestions for improvement.
Apparently, people improving their character and working on their middot are of great concern to Israel’s security.
ISIS enthusiasts working on their Jihad are, of course, far less threatening. ;)

On the subject of how a seemingly bad thing actually turned out wonderfully, there is a particularly striking story:

In Miriam Cohen’s biographical book, A Daughter of Two Mothers, we meet Rivka and Nachman Klar of Selish [Vinograd], Hungary, and their many children.

Rivka and Nachman Klar are warm, humble, intelligent, and kind people who live in such poverty that they serve soup to their hungry guests while filling their own bowls with plain hot water.

Their home consists of a small bedroom for the parents and one other large room which serves as the family's kitchen/dining room/living room during the day and the children’s bedroom at night, with beds comprised of mattresses lain over chairs.

Light came from kerosene lanterns, water from a community well outside, refrigeration was created by placing food between the glass panes of a window in cold weather, and the toilet was an outhouse in a shared courtyard. Yet the family managed happily in their impoverished state, with Nachman Klar eking out a living via his highly skilled carpentry and an older daughter contributing the salary she made by working at a local store.

Nachman Klar’s main source of work was through a wealthy man in the center of town. In 1933, however, this business was then passed on to the wealthy man’s son, who suddenly decided to fire Nachman Klar. Puzzled by the dismissal of Nachman's dedicated and skilled work and distressed by the sudden loss of income for an already impoverished family, the Klars decide to consult the Spinker Rebbe regarding what they should do next.

This particular Rebbe was known for giving advice in hints only. But this time, the Rebbe outright commanded Nachman Klar to take his family to Eretz Yisrael. The entire village was shocked, but the Klars prepare to do as the Rebbe says.

And by doing so, they managed to avoid the entire devastation of World War II and the Shoah. They never experienced the fear and the creeping discrimination that ended in their entire community being crammed into a ghetto and then later crated off to Auschwitz. They even merited to adopt a beloved orphan from that community when that orphan later finds them in their new Jerusalem home after the Shoah.

Now, what if at the time when Nachman Klar first lost his job, he decided to sue his new boss? What if he started ranting about his terrible fate? It’s easy to imagine what someone in his position could say:
“God, after keeping your Torah so faithfully and in such poverty, this is what you do to me? My family and I have cared and provided for our fellow Jews—Your beloved children—with such sacrifice and dedication! And this is our reward?”

Wouldn’t it be understandable had he complained about the unfair treatment—“Why doesn’t the father say anything to convince his son to keep me on the payroll? He knows how hard I work and how much I need this job!”—or decried the character of the younger generation: “Oy, this young man doesn’t care about work ethic or loyalty; no one understands why he fired me!”

I think most of us would feel that such statements would’ve been completely justified. After all, they were true. Firing Nachman Klar truly wasn't fair. It wasn't rational.

Yet being fired was the impetus to get the family to Eretz Yisrael before Germany was even a threat to the rest of Europe.

In 1933, Hitler had only just come to power and the boycott he’d launched against the Jews didn't really take hold and what did take hold only lasted for one day because the German people just weren’t into it. By the time the Klars actually left Hungary in 1934, the Nazis were still discriminating collectively: not only against the Jews, but against anyone they deemed unfit for society.

In fact, concentration camps and prisons at that time were being filled with mostly non-Jews—union leaders, political opponents, Communists, habitual thieves, homeless vagrants (and anyone else labeled “socially deviant”)—and non-Jewish anti-Nazi news outlets were being shut down. Who knew that 10 years later, Nazi troops would arrive in Selish/Vinograd, start off with all sorts of persecutions, cram the Jews into a ghetto, and then liquidate the entire community down to the very last baby?

Had the Klars stayed, they would’ve experienced the increasing discrimination and ominous curfews and then likely died in a gas chamber. Even if one or two of them had survived, they’d have continued with a life haunted by nightmares and suffering.

But just imagine how long it took for them to realize exactly how lucky they were.

Oh, certainly, they realized at least some of their good fortune upon arriving in Eretz Yisrael, which had only been a dream until then. But it would have been years before they truly understood how much suffering and tragedy they escaped.

Being fired while already in a state of extreme poverty was actually the kindest and most beneficial thing that could happen to Nachman Klar and his family at that time.

But unlike the Klars, we often don't get to see the finale of a particular story in our lives.

Personally, I find it very difficult to feel grateful every time something I don't like happens. It's a struggle each time (but at least I try).

Yet maybe remembering the Klars can give our gratitude-struggle a bit of an extra boost.

In this week's Parshat Beshalach:

• The Kli Yakar discusses mental/spiritual illness, its cause, and its remedy, and its parallels to physical illness. (Unlike today's mere lip service to treating mental illness just like physical illness, the Kli Yakar actually does it.)
• We also take a look at what the Pele Yoetz has to say about addiction, its treatment and its cure.

From an ancient discussion of what kind of wood Hashem showed Moshe Rabbeinu (olive, willow, or oleander), the Kli Yakar goes with olive.

He quotes Devarim Rabbah, which compares Torah to an olive because an olive is initially bitter, but becomes sweet in the end.

The Kli Yakar doesn't pull any punches here.

Although based on what he writes throughout his commentary on the Chumash, the Kli Yakar clearly loves the Torah and mitzvot and personally found immense pleasure in Torah and mitzvot, beyond any possible pleasure in this world.

Yet he still acknowledges that before you start to enjoy Torah's pleasure, you can initially experience Torah and mitzvot as bitter.

So Hashem’s intention at the bitter waters was that:

Later, regarding Shemot/Exodus 15:26, the Kli Yakar says:

Then the Kli Yakar explains what else God said:

Mental illness is nothing new. Even in today's modern Hebrew, a mentally ill person is still referred to as choleh nefesh: soul-sick.

The Kli Yakar was obviously familiar with “diseases of the soul” and clearly acknowledged there were such ailments back in ancient times, too.
 
Interestingly, the Kli Yakar, taking a lesson from how we treat physical illness, insists that bitter remedies are vital for healing the soul, too.
 
This is so different from today’s “just take a pill!” approach to mental illness.
​
It seems that we just want the mentally ill person to feel better, rather than to truly heal the illness at its core.
 
This superficial approach to mental illness isn’t done on purpose, of course, but is simply the result of a poor understanding of mental illness and its roots.

Yet the Kli Yakar clearly grasps and describes the roots of mental illness (or soul-sickness):

• Bad (or harmful or false) beliefs
• Stiffening your neck (i.e., being inappropriately mule-headed)
• Not trusting the Healer (i.e., God)
• Refusing to swallow the necessary and bitter "medication"  

 
Similarly, in his chapter on Drinking/Shtiyah/שתיה, the Pele Yoetz writes of the initial bitterness when breaking alcohol addiction. First, he advises the addict to refrain from even the most minimal ingestion of alcohol - except for Kiddush, Havdalah, and the 4 cups of wine during the Passover Seder.
(With the lack of refrigeration, I’m not sure whether switching the above with grape juice was a realistic solution.)

Here's what Rabbi Eliezer Papo writes in his book, Pele Yoetz:

(To read this extremely short chapter of Pele Yoetz in either English or Hebrew, or to hear Rabbi Mansour discuss it in audio, please click here and scroll down to "Drinking Wine.")

Personally, I don’t differentiate between mental illness and addictions.

Addicts definitely talk like those suffering from personality disorders (which is also known as “addictive thinking” or “stinkin’ thinkin’”) and I just see mental illness as an addiction of sorts to certain behaviors, rather than to an actual substance.
​
I could be wrong, of course, but that is what my research has shown me.
 
So expanding on the Pele Yoetz’s attitude toward treatment and recovery from alcoholism, one should accept the initial pain and discomfort of self-denial as a kaparah, as an atonement, for all that he did while under the influence of his addiction or mental illness or soul-sickness.

Adapting positive behaviors and beliefs while resisting negative behaviors and beliefs is definitely distressing and bitter at the beginning.

But the sufferer can take comfort in the fact that the initial suffering is not meaningless.

On the contrary, the initial suffering is very meaningful and profoundly cleansing, spiritually speaking.

And then later, comes the sweetness of good spiritual and mental health.
 
May we all merit the complete healing of our bodies, minds, and souls. 

In the last section of Likutei Moharan I:282 [רפב], it delves into the idea behind the 10th verse of Tehillim 37:

וְעוֹד מְעַט וְאֵין רָשָׁע וְהִתְבּוֹנַנְתָּ עַל מְקוֹמוֹ וְאֵינֶנּוּ

"And just a little bit more, and the rasha is not here, and you shall gaze upon his place and he is not there."

The Likutei Moharan connects this to the concept of Azamra [I will sing praise and thanksgiving], of finding a good quality in even the worst person.
 
The power of Azamra ignites such a powerful and positive spiritual effect within the other person—even if that person is totally evil—it can actually propel that person to do teshuvah.
 
This idea of digging for the spark of light amid all the darkness is not something that Rebbe Nachman invented; it is a core Jewish concept elucidated on by the Kli Yakar nearly a century before the Baal Shem Tov (founder of Chassidus) was even born and 163 years before Rebbe Nachman came into the world.
(For the Kli Yakar’s elucidation, please see How to Avoid being a Pathological Pollyanna, especially down toward the end.)
 
Also, contrary to what a lot of Torah classes unfortunately promote, being dan l’kaf zechut—finding a favorable quality or merit in someone or in their deeds—does not mean that we justify or excuse behavior the Torah clearly condemns as wrong or harmful.

Yes, it's true that:

• Someone may truly not be aware of the extent their behavior hurts others.
• They may feel incapable of controlling themselves.
• They may truly feel a warped justification in behaving a certain way.

 
That doesn’t make their behavior “okay,” nor does it make it okay for them to behave this way.

Likewise, swooning with pity and compassion for that person’s unenlightened state (and insisting that all that person’s victims swoon along with you) is not the ideal response (despite what you might hear from friends or from a rebbetzin or rabbi). Understanding and forgiving the person isn’t necessary either.

(“Understanding” is overrated and forgiveness can be a long and arduous journey that isn’t always possible or necessary; some people’s actions are unforgivable.)
 
It’s worth noting that both the Kli Yakar and Likutei Moharan discuss finding a meritorious quality regarding a rasha—an intentionally evil person. They don’t mince words. According to the word's definition, the rasha means to do harm and doesn’t care about the consequences or who he hurts. It’s not a label our Sages use lightly.

Rasha.

Not “misguided” or “means well” or “just doesn’t know!” or “nebbuch” or “never had the chance to learn Torah” or “had a bad childhood”…
 
Rasha.
 
He is truly bad news.
But.
There is still some flicker of light in all his murky darkness.
And if you can find it and name it, you can stir him to do teshuvah.
 
Let’s look at a modern-day example of someone who could use your spark-seeking ability:
Let’s take a teenage Leftist who thinks that Rabin and Peres are heroes and that Arab squatters are victims of Jews settling their Divinely bequeathed Homeland.

Saying, “Well, he doesn’t really know any better” about a teenage Leftist does not make his Peace Now activities “okay.”

Yes, it’s true that he doesn’t know any better, considering the environment in which he grew up.

And yes, it’s also true that he is causing profound damage to good and innocent Jews while granting power and influence to truly horrible people, both Erev Rav Jews and Jihadis. Not to mention the damage his actions causes in the spiritual realms.
 
It’s all true.
 
What I got out of this passage of Likutei Moharan is that you need to spot a quality that is actually good.

Sure, “He doesn’t know any better” is a merit in his favor—at least he doesn’t mean to harm and thinks he’s doing the right thing.

But the quality to focus on is that he has a desire to do the right thing—even if that desire is disturbingly misused.
 
“He doesn’t know any better” is an excuse, a dismissal.
 
“He wants to do the right thing and is ready to make the effort to do it” is an actual good quality that leads to:
“So Hashem, please guide him to use this quality for true good. May this young man fight the good fight on Your Side, and not the Other Side (the Sitra Achra).”

And THAT is exactly what can change our hapless Leftist from a Jihadi's lackey to a passionate Torah Jew.
 
Interestingly, the passage in Likutei Moharan also addresses the reader, too.
 
YOU must find at least one good quality in yourself.
 
With the American culture's emphasis on self-promotion and physical activism ("Get out there and do it!"), it’s easy to forget that the most powerful and effective way to effect change is in your own mind.
 
Revenge, slander, confrontations, and lawsuits grant a certain amount of satisfaction and even restitution for wrongs done. But they don’t really change the dysfunctional person or the situation. It doesn’t prevent the abuse or harm from happening again.
 
And even if you make yourself so confident and project a persona of “It-Sure-Ain’t-Worth-It-to-Mess-with-Me!” that the baddies are deterred from starting up with you, you’re only helping yourself and not protecting anyone else.
 
Azamra! Search out the spark of good in someone else and then sing that spark’s praise to Hashem. (Don’t worry; you don’t have to literally sing if you don’t want to. Just saying it is good, too.)
 
That’s the real way to kindle change in another person, even if that person is yourself.
 
No excuses or justifications for bad and hurtful behavior.
 
Just the real honest truth.
 
Even when there’s mostly darkness, there is also still some small spark of light.
 
Find it and ignite real positive change.

One of the things that liberal Jews and everyone else likes to have conniptions about is how Jewish immigrants were also discriminated against and later banned from coming just as they were being genocided in Europe.

So as Jews, we are supposed to understand and empathize with all immigrants.


Furthermore, because Jews have done well in America (proving discrimination and bans against Jewish immigrants to have been very wrong), many Jews feel this means that all immigrants should be given a chance.

Well, the one HUGE difference between Jews and everyone else is that fundamental American stuff, like the Constitution and many Western laws and cultural values, are based on Judaism. In other words, Jews are the source for American culture. This is why, for example, there is exists the term “Judeo-Christian values.” Notice how you’ve never heard terms like “Islamo-Christian values” or “Animist-Christian values” or “Hindu-Christian values.”

(FYI: "Judeo-Christian" is not an accurate term. Yeah, we all know what people mean when they say it, but just to be nitpicky: Any Jewish values found in Christianity are still just that: Jewish. And any Christian values are not.)

Anyway, there was no problem letting Jews in because Jews upheld—heck, invented—the very values America held dear. (Well, not "invented," per se, but transmitted directly from God...)

Jews also lacked the crime and alcoholism rate to which other groups—like the Irish and Italians—were prone.
(Although we love your accents, Irish people! And we love your food, Italian people!)

And for better or for worse, Jews wanted to assimilate.

(This is actually a bad trait in Jewish immigrants, but it tends to be a good trait for everyone else coming to America.)

In general, Jews wanted to be American and speak English and get educated and rich, move into nice neighborhoods, and get along with everyone.

(And even the minority of Jewish immigrants that did sequester themselves do not display the terrible socio-economic problems that other immigrant neighborhoods in America and Europe show. Yes, I know there are problems. But it is not the same as Mexican, African, or Muslim immigrant neighborhoods. It's just not.)

Do Papuans and Syrians and Mexicans want to wholly assimilate into America? Likely some really do. But as things look right now, a large percentage of them don’t.
(And if you don't believe me, then please read The Immigration Dilemma: Part of the Geula Process and Refusing the Wretched Refuse.)

Another big difference was that Jews helped—and still help—their fellow Jewish immigrants in America.

Even the very early Jewish immigration (late 1800s-early 1900s) from Europe received help.

From whom, you might ask?

Sephardim were the first Jews to settle America. They were a bit embarrassed by their impoverished and not-as-snazzy brethren arriving from Eastern Europe, so they were surreptitious about the aid they provided, but the early Jewish aid organizations were largely funded by Sephardim. (You just didn’t see them much in the actual flesh.)

Likewise, the massive Jewish immigration from Russia received enormous help from the present Jewish communities in the USA. Jewish communities generously helped with subsidizing housing, school placement and tuition to Jewish schools, food, furniture, and job placement.

For some reason, people (including many Jews themselves) hate to acknowledge this, but Jews as immigrants are and have always been in a class of their own.

And again, our value system provided America with its value system. We are the source.

Jews need to stop projecting their image onto immigrants from primitive and brutal cultures.

It’s simply not accurate or helpful.

I couldn’t stop thinking about the little news announcement that President Trump will allow the 1250 “refugees” from Papua New Guinea that Obama agreed to take from Australia.

(Australia is pretty big and not crowded. Why couldn't it take them all? Maybe it doesn't want to? Why not? We'll soon see...)

Also my blog provider, Weebly, which provides a wonderful service, recently sent an email requesting donations for an organization which helps relocate refugees and helps refugees “get their slice of the American dream.”

The problem is, many refugees today aren’t interested in the American dream.

(It's also disturbing because there are so many American children and elderly suffering in bad situations. Why does everybody ignore them and insist on donations for carbon footprints and refugees who might be sociopaths?)

I already wrote about immigration here, but I thought I’d write about it again.

Why?

Well, this week's Haftarah in Yirmeyahu/Jeremiah linked to other chapters of Yirmeyahu which discuss nations being punished by being invaded from other nations. And I think we're seeing this now. But it's being done slowly because Hashem is infinitely Compassionate and Merciful and gives us loads of time to shape up.

Anyway, growing up in America’s Eighties, I saw a lot of immigrants, mostly Pacific Asian and Russian. And they did really well in America.

They wanted to do well.

Then, on a visit to London, I saw a lot of wealthy Hindus from India in Rolls Royces.

British friends of mine told me of the high-quality treatment they received from Pakistani doctors.

Immigrants of that time also wanted to adapt to American (or British) culture, and not just enjoy the goodies the West has to offer while hanging on to all their old cultural baggage that ruined their country of origin in the first place.

In fact, that was the truth about a lot of immigrants.

Sure, the desire to acclimate depended on age. Younger immigrants more strongly desired and found it easier to take on the new culture and its language. It also depended on where they lived to some extent. A wholly immigrant neighborhood made and still makes it harder for its residents to acclimate to the new culture.

But Third World immigration is a whole new ballgame today.

Not only is the technological difference vaster than ever (I remember hearing last year that part of acclimating immigrants from South America is teaching them to use an indoor flushing toilet), but the cultural differences are also vast.

While many of these parts of the world are plagued with gang violence, armed skirmishes, and a horribly corrupt government, their underlying culture is problematic on its own.

Let’s look at Papua New Guinea:
(And why are these people being called “refugees” anyway?)

• 2/3 of all households suffer from domestic violence. (Were the incoming immigrants screened for this?)
• In Bougainville, 80% of all men say that they committed physical violence or worse against a girl friend or wife. (I sure hope that none of the incoming Papuans are males from Bougainville!)
• Polygamy is common among Papuans, with the new wife sometimes joining in with the husband to physically abuse the first wife. (Were the “refugees” screened for this, too?)

Travel advisories also tell us a lot:

• Visitors to Papua New Guinea are advised that making eye contact at all is disrespectful. Speaking loudly and making eye contact is considered very rude.

Why, I’m sure these people will fit right in with American culture, no problem!

• Also, Papuans are apparently so violently impulsive (“temperamental” in Travel Advisory-speak) that if there is an accident (even if you are not at all at fault) in which a person, pig, or chicken is hurt, then you are advised to keep driving until you reach the nearest police station.

This means that you are forced to participate in the act of hit-and-run that is so despised and illegal in American culture - even if a person is hurt and you want to help him.

Also, what if a Papuan is driving recklessly in, say, Miami and hits you, killing his chicken?
Can you imagine getting out of your car to exchange the accepted info (and even accept an apology) only to face an outraged Tok Pisin-speaker brandishing a knife?

(I forgot to mention that in Papua New Guinea, everyone carries a bush knife.)

• The Papuan rate of AIDS/HIV is the highest in Oceania. Studies show that this is due to the high rate of aggression against women and the high rate of drug and alcohol abuse.

Gosh, just the kind of people we’d like to have living next door!
No wonder feminists are leading the crusade to accept immigrants!

• Another thing that irks Papuans is if someone seems to be practicing some kind of sorcery. I do not know what the signs of a sorcerer are in Papua New Guinea, but if they just suspect you of casting spells or whatever, they tend to get extremely “temperamental.” Accusations of sorcery are especially common against women.

 

• Cannibalism is a problem is some areas of Papua New Guinea, but I’m sure none of the new “refugees” are from those tribes.

In "vetting" we trust!

The West has not yet realized that different cultures cling to different values.

Many people coming to America just want free stuff and indoor plumbing.

Many are just fine with the values of their native culture, even to their detriment.


For example, many Muslim women think that husbands have a right to beat their wives. Also, the female “circumcision” so common in Muslim and African cultures is often carried out by women. In cases in which the father is willing to forgo it for his daughters, the mother often insists on it.

Here in Israel, we are very familiar with the fondness primitive people have for their unholy values. The pitiable African refugees allowed in by soft-hearted border guards and black-hearted politicians have wreaked havoc in the Israeli neighborhoods they’ve taken over. And if you ask Muslim men in Israel what they think of wife-beating, you’ll receive very honest and confident answers. In fact, if you ask them what they think of suicide bombings, you’ll also get honest and confident answers.

Israel recently accepted 100 Syrian orphans. This sounds like a nice, healing act to perform. However, history has shown there is almost no chance these orphans will recall this kindness with any kind of gratitude. In one generation, it's likely that these orphans will multiply to at least 500 people who want to destroy the Jews of Israel.

The Arab culture in Israel indoctrinates its children toward hatred and Jihad. And the brainwashing is intense, as MEMRI has proven. And does anyone remember the Pan-Arab popular Iranian TV series, Zahra’s Blue Eyes? The story takes place in Israel's West Bank and is about a little Arab girl named Zahra with eyes so beautiful that the monstrous Israelis wanted to pry her eyes out of her face to transplant them into someone else's. Or something.

(As if we don't have beautiful eyes of our own!)

And anyway, places like Dubai and Saudi Arabia have plenty of room and funds to help not just 100 orphans, but 10,000 orphans.

So why can't they just hate us from over there?

Do you know one of the big differences between sociopaths and normal people?

Sociopaths think that horrific things like torture, dismemberment, assault, and murder are only bad if it happens to them personally.


They have no problem with it happening to other people, and they can even do it themselves to other people.

So just because a Third World person is crying about the suffering in their native land doesn’t mean anyone should take them in.

First, I want to know if torture, dismemberment, theft, and assault only bothers them when it happens to them, or if it bothers them when it happens to other people, too.

I also want to make sure that they won’t do to others the bad things that have been done to them.

Can Weebly promise me that donations will not be used to relocate within America people who are fans of female "circumcision," domestic violence, violence in general, and people who won't become "temperamental" if someone injures their chicken or looks them in the eye while enthusing about some lame tweet against the latest Ben Shapiro speech?

Along these lines of the above-quoted Hillel's famous phrase from Shabbat 31a, people who identify with bad people are showing that they themselves are bad people.

Americans who ignore the suffering of, say, their own children and elderly (who are likely basically decent people) in favor of helping people of whom the majority seem to hold reprehensible values close to their heart, are unconsciously showing with whom they identify and empathize.

And this is very disturbing.

As a young mother, I was sitting on the bench outside our apartment building with another young mother who’d grown up in the Karliner Chassidic community in Jerusalem.

(I’m from a somewhat traditional secular home and became Orthodox later, so Gitty and I come from extremely different backgrounds.)

I was telling her how much I admired my son’s ganenet, Mindel, a warm and quiet woman whom Gitty had known her whole life.

At a pause in the conversation, Gitty very quietly asked, “Tell me, do you think she’s better than you?”

I did, actually. But the question caught me off-guard, so I just remained silent.

“Well?" said Gitty. "Do you think that she’s better than you?”

I still didn’t answer. Was Gitty insulting me or complimenting me? Anyway, I thought about Mindel’s warm and reassuring approach toward other mothers and her gentle caring way with the children, and I wanted to answer, Yes, I think she’s better than me.

“Tell me,” said Gitty. “Do you think she’s wiser than you? Smarter?”

“Uhhh…” I faltered. The questions were only getting weirder. Anyway, how does one compare intelligence? There’s different kinds, with emotional intelligence being the most important and exactly what Mindel possessed an abundance of.

“She’s not,” Gitty said.

“What?”

She gave a refined giggle. “You’re smarter than her.”

Did she mean my college education (that I had never finished)? Who cares about that?

“No, Mindel’s really wonderful,” I blustered. “She’s such a nice person and so great with the kids…”

“Yes,” said Gitty. “Mindel is wonderful. I've known her a long time. She’s great. But she was brought up to be that way. She didn’t have to build herself up with her own ten fingers—like you.”

I sat in stunned silence. Why was Gitty saying this? She hardly knew me.

She went on to explain, “Mindel’s mother is a quiet, gentle person. Her father lovingly invested years of his life as a rebbi for small children. Mindel was raised well, she saw good frum chinuch methods her whole life...baruch Hashem, she doesn’t know any other way to be.”

After a moment of contemplation, Gitty continued,
“Tell me, if your mother fries an egg a certain way and you fry it the same way—does that mean anything? If you always see how your mother folds towels, and you fold them the same way, does that mean you’re a towel-folding genius? No. Because you’re just copying what you always saw at home. Do you understand?”

I nodded. “Yes.”

“Do you? Do you really understand? Because it’s like this: There are a lot of successful people out there. But they usually have a secret to their success. They have money, or a really helpful husband, or family support, or they were raised to be a certain way. For example, I have a cousin with 18 kids.  And things look great.  And things are great! The kids are turning out well. People always look at her with admiration and go, ‘Ooh-ah-wow!’”

“Yeah,” I said. "Wow!"

“No,” Gitty said. “She also grew up in a large, well-adjusted family, so she automatically knows how to manage a large family. When she got married, she moved in to a place just down the street from her parents' home and her mother came early every morning to help her get the kids dressed and fed—ever since they were little babies. She has loads of sisters and nieces nearby to help her whenever she needs.


"Her husband runs an entire school system, which brings in a lot of money, allowing her to cut corners with easier and more expensive ready-made food, plus cleaning help three times a week. Being very chinuch- and child-oriented, her husband was also always very involved with the kids in a positive way. In fact, he used to come home and spend 2 hours every evening giving the kids supper and getting them bathed and into bed while she either rested or tidied up. What's more, her innate nature is to stay home and deal with the kids. She honestly doesn’t feel the need to go out and do anything else. So you see? She has tremendous resources, both from within her and from the environment surrounding her. So regarding people like her, we say, ‘Thank God—baruch Hashem.’ We say, ‘Good for her--kol hakavod.’ But to become breathless with admiration and gasp, ‘Ooh-ah-wow’?”

​Gitty shook her head. “No. She is just doing what she was brought up to do and what she feels naturally inclined to do. And she does it well. Baruch Hashem.”

Then Gitty’s gaze grew intense. “Yes, a woman struggling with, for example, three kids and barely managing will look at a woman managing beautifully with 18 kids, and say, ‘Ooh-ah-wow.’ But maybe the woman with three kids has three really hard kids, and her husband doesn’t help, and she has no money, and she doesn’t have family support...”

Gitty cocked her head to one side. “So who’s more precious in Hashem’s eyes? Who do you think? I’m telling you that the regular woman struggling with the three kids is more precious to Hashem.”

I mulled that over.

Gitty nodded and declared, “The people who are successful and built themselves from scratch--they’re rare. They deserve the ‘Ooh-ah-wow' reaction, and not my cousin.”

She went on to describe her own home. 

She was the first girl born after five boys, and more boys and girls followed:
​
“In my mother’s home, there was balagan [mess]. Food was in abundance—simple food, but healthy food. Not junk. Every day, there was a huge pot of chicken wings or chicken necks or meat with potatoes or whatever—and balagan. In my house, there was noise, there was mess, there was drum-banging, there was gravel being dragged in, and there was dirt. And believe me, that’s the best way to raise emotionally healthy children.”

Gitty gave a sheepish smile. “But I’m not on my mother’s level. My house is always clean because I get embarrassed if my neighbors stop by and it’s not presentable. But it’s not right to be like me. My mother was right.”

​She added, “My brothers also knew how to bake, cook, and sew. And that’s right.”

And I never forgot this lesson from Gitty: Try to see things through Hashem’s Eyes.

It’s easy to get caught up in comparing yourself (or others) to others, but in reality, the wide variation of different people’s resources and skills and opportunities make comparisons a meaningless exercise.

Gitty herself seemed like just this typical young chassidiste raised in the Old-World atmosphere of Geula.

​But she was a special person herself and wise beyond her years.

And I'm far from being the only person on whom Gitty pours forth her wisdom.

Using Gitty’s method of viewing other people taught me to admire people I otherwise wouldn’t have looked up to. I learned to appreciate people unappreciated by others and to see them as Hashem likely sees them.

The Gemara says that This World is an upside-down world.

And that’s the Truth.