"Instead of stinging nettle, myrtle will rise" (Isaiah 55:13)
 "Instead of evil, good will rise." (The Malbim's Interpretation)
Myrtle Rising
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Comments Policy
  • Aliyah
    • Mini-Intro
    • General Cultural Insights
    • School Tips
  • Kli Yakar Index
  • Privacy Policy

Alone at the Pesach Seder This Year

5/4/2020

7 Comments

 
As much as I would really like to give chizuk & insight at this time because I think reading the regular news is already distressing enough, however...

...I can't stop thinking about my widowed mother-in-law in her mid-70s, but to due to a lifetime of stress and health issues, she's physically & emotionally even older than that.

So she's worn out, she had a stroke over a decade ago and diabetes now, plus pain in her leg. 

But she's also a social person. She really needs people around her.

And she has neighbors in next-door apartments and more neighbors also just a few footsteps across the way.

And usually, we've all taken turns going to her for Pesach, or, in later years, she's taken turns coming to each of us.

But this year, she's alone.

And because of a traumatic event back in Morocco that caused her father's death when she was only 6, her formerly wealthy family lost much of their money and my mother-in-law was pulled out of school.

So she never learned to read.

And she's going to sit there at the Pesach Seder all by herself...and she can't read the Haggadah.

Yes, there are phrases here and there that she knows by heart.

"Bivilu yatzanu miMitzrayim..."

Upon saying Bivilu, Moroccans take the Seder plate and circle it over the head of each participant, ending with a gentle bonk on each head. (I was told this symbolizes Mt. Sinai being held over the heads of bnei Yisrael, but I'm not sure if that's the real reason.)

So she knows Bivilu, but I'm not sure what else.

And I know that even if that's all she's able to say, that's like a big rav saying it.

Whatever we do is precious in Shamayim as long as we're putting forth our best effort.

Hashem judges us by our own resources, and not those of others.

I also know that she does talk to Hashem & knows that He hears her.

Back in Morocco, it was common for multi-generational extended family to live in 2-3-story homes (the ground floor often being either the family store or a communal place for the whole family to hang out).

And that's normal for her.

You weren't really ever alone. And even in a situation like now, you wouldn't really be alone.

And now she is.

Maybe a neighbor will read the Haggadah out loud from a window (as far as I saw, they don't have porches in the poor immigrant neighborhood my husband's family ended up in and where my mother-in-law still lives). 

So on one hand, the mental image of my older doll-like mother-in-law sitting at the Seder by herself unable to even perform the basics of the Haggadah lingers in my mind.

And it pangs my heart.

On the other hand, it makes me feel grateful for what I have, which are so common, I don't always think to appreciate them as much as I really should: immediate family at home – and the ability to read.

So, yeah, this is kind of a downer.

But maybe it's also good perspective for appreciating what we DO have (which might be less this Pesach than previous Pesachs).
7 Comments

Dina's Rosh Chodesh Secret

20/3/2020

0 Comments

 
On a Rosh Chodesh, not long after we were first married, my Moroccan-born Israeli-bred husband and I went to visit an older cousin of his living in a small but attractive apartment in a predominantly secular neighborhood in Yerushalayim.

Her name was Dina & she served us some leftover hamin (Moroccan cholent), in which every garbanzo bean tasted like it had been cooked individually to perfection.

As we sat in her kitchen, I couldn't help noticing the massive placard of Birkat Hamazon taped to the wall next to the kitchen table, similar to what you find in some schools. Above was a handwritten sign saying: Rosh Chodesh today – ya'aleh v'yavo!!! 

Ya'aleh v'yavo is a special prayer inserted within Birkat Hamazon (and Shemoneh Esrei) in honor of Rosh Chodesh.

That's odd, I thought. Her youngest in his 20s. Why does she need such a large placard by the table?

She must have put it up for her grandchildren, I figured.

Nice. She initially impressed me as more traditional than religious – the type that keeps Shabbat and kashrut, but isn't always knowledgeable in other areas – but apparently she's more knowledgeable & serious about her mitzvah observance than she appeared. Very impressive.

At the time, I also didn't realize she was covering her hair because the shaitel she wore was a very realistic copy of the bordeaux-colored hair popular among older Sefardi women in Eretz Yisrael.

Then I noticed a sign on her fridge: Rosh Chodesh today – don't forget ya'aleh v'yavo!

And on her upper kitchen cabinet, I saw another handwritten sign: Remember – ya'aleh v'yavo!

I was no longer so sure the massive Birkat Hamazon with its accompanying Rosh Chodesh reminder was for her grandchildren because signs on refrigerators & kitchen cabinets are usually for oneself and not for the grandchildren.

Then we moved into the artfully decorated living room, where I saw another massive placard of Birkat Hamazon taped to the azure wall next to the dining room table.

That's definitely unusually because many people don't wish to affect their living room-dining room look with a massive placard of Birkat Hamazon.

I realized that in this home, Birkat Hamazon was of the utmost importance.

And this placard also sat under another handwritten admonishment to remember to say ya'aleh v'yavo.

I realized it must be for her.

Just to make sure, I politely asked her about it.

With a self-conscious yet contented little laugh, she admitted that yes, it was for her. Still, self-conscious she murmured something about how it's just her thing.

"Nice," I enthused. "Very nice, actually."

In all my life, I had never seen someone so concerned about forgetting to say ya'aleh v'yavo during Birkat Hamazon.

Impressed, I wondered where her dedication to ya'aleh v'yavo came from.

And I think I got the answer several years later on the way to a family wedding.

The Long-Lasting Influence of "Beis Yaakov" of Tangier, Morocco

On a special bus reserved for taking my husband's extended family to his brother's wedding, I found myself sitting next to Dina.

Not only did I like Dina, she also had the most beautiful French-Ladino accent on her Hebrew, making her even more of a pleasure to listen to.

Also, whenever I find myself with my husband's older female family members, I always try as gently as I can to get them to tell me about their lives back in Morocco. 

Usually, they're a bit hesitant due to Moroccan culture being looked down on by Ashkenazi (mostly secular) Israelis as primitive. Sometimes, their own children make fun of them for it. The fact that for many (maybe even most) Moroccan Jews, Arabic is their main mother-tongue didn't help things. 

(It's a very Jewish-style Arabic however – it's not Judeo-Arabic, but more like yeshivish English.)

Some cover it up by emphasizing their knowledge of French, but the majority of Moroccan Jews I've met are more comfortable speaking Arabic.

But once you show you're open-minded and even eager (though not too eager, because that can be kind of demeaning too), they usually open right up.

Dina had grown up in Meknes speaking French and Arabic. Then her parents sent her to the Jewish girls school in Tangier, where they spoke Ladino.

Dina was of that age which some girls attended school and some didn't. And no offense to the romanticized image of the pious unlearned Moroccan woman (who did exist, but that type was more characteristic of the generation above Dina), but in Dina's generation, there is a sharp difference between the ones who received a Jewish education and the ones who didn't.

The ones who didn't are often traditional, but not necessarily so pious or so knowledgeable.

I know how weird that sounds because their own mothers were pretty knowledgeable in the areas they needed to be. So why didn't it get passed down to their daughters without a formal education? I'm not sure. I think it has to do with the same ruach that affected the Jewish girls in Europe pre-WWII. The Beis Yaakov girls were stunning in their knowledge, middot, and mesirut nefesh. But most of the girls who did not manage to receive a good formal Jewish education did not end up the same way as the Beis Yaakov girls, even if they had pious mothers. Some did, but most did not.

​But the Moroccan women you'll meet who received a solid Jewish education in Morocco are incredibly committed.

Anyway, I asked Dina if it was Beis Yaakov, and she said it wasn't exactly a branch of Beis Yaakov, but it was very similar to Beis Yaakov.

Because these were sheltered Jewish girls from good families living away from home in a dorm in a country where neither Jews nor females had many rights, the school really watched over the girls like their own daughters.

Dina recalls that in addition to the warmth of the teachers, there were also madrichot (counselors) in the dormitory (which was in the same building as the school, I think). Because girls married by age 18 in Morocco at that time, the madrichot weren't much older than the students, and they were more like big sisters to the students.

One of Dina's warmest memories of her school was Rosh Chodesh.

On Rosh Chodesh, all the girls would get together and produce a meal fitting for Rosh Chodesh, along with a variety of the tasty little Moroccan pastries you see at their simchahs until today.

Then they would all sit down to eat and sing piyutim (poetic Hebrew love songs to Hashem written by holy rabbis), including special piyutim for Rosh Chodesh.

And I realized that this solid foundation in Yiddishkeit is what held Dina so firmly throughout all the years and transitions.

She covered her hair even when it was uncomfortable & unfashionable to do so, like among secular upper-class people who already looked down on her for being Moroccan.

While I normally don't admire shaitels that are indistinguishable from real hair, I feel that in Dina's situation, it's a tremendous virtue & I admire her so much for it.

​It shows her mesirut nefesh for covering her hair. In her situation, there was no other comfortable way to do it.

And now her unique dedication to ya'aleh v'yavo also made sense.

The "Beis Yaakov" of Tangier managed to ingrain into their students a profound appreciation of Rosh Chodesh – a monthly holiday with a special emphasis for women.

And that quiet impact still reverberates many decades later.
  • Why is Rosh Chodesh Considered a "Women's Holiday​"?
Okay, I just have to vent here. True confession time: I ALSO WANT TO LEARN IN BEIS YAAKOV OF TANGIER! I was born in the wrong place at the wrong time! ... Okay, yes, I know that Hashem always put me exactly where I needed to be in order to achieve my personal tikkun, but I can't tell you how much I would've loved learning Torah Judaism in Ladino (!!!) with a familial staff, and cooking & baking all sorts of delicacies on Rosh Chodesh while singing piyutim with all the girls. It's really something worth envying, no?
0 Comments

Rav Avigdor Miller on Jews Falling in Love with Ourselves in Parshat Miketz

26/12/2019

0 Comments

 
In Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshas Mikeitz – Chanukah 3 – Pride of Israel, Rav Miller first delves into the real story of Chanukah.

And the ugly truth about the story is that our real enemies were the same persecutors who joined the Reform Movement (and got the Malbim imprisoned on false charges) or the Communist Yevsektsia, both of whom made trouble for dedicated Jews with the non-Jewish authorities.

Today, we have terrorist-sympathizing Leftists, among others.

Back then, these troublemakers were known as mityavnim – those who became Greek, the Hellenizers.

Through their vocations (like tax collecting), they came in contact with the Greek elite, and then these mityavnim became upper-class elitists who scorned Torah ideals and strove to emulate the ideals of their surrounding society.

Yes, this has repeated itself several times, particularly in the past 200 years.

​So Rav Miller emphasizes that all the tragedy and challenge of Chanukah started with Jews who fell in love with their surrounding non-Jewish society (including the aspects diametrically opposed by the Torah), and lost their heads.

Then he segues into the story of a Jew who could have been swallowed up by his non-Jewish surrounding society, but didn't allow that to happen:

Yosef Hatzaddik.​

When "Nice!" Means "The End"

Upon his release from lengthy imprisonment underground, Yosef Hatzaddik was made into one of the most powerful people in Egypt. 

And back then, Egypt was a vast & powerful empire, plus it was the leader in ancient hi-tech.

And Yosef Hatzaddik was second only to Paroh (Pharaoh) at the top of this incredible empire.

From both Egyptian royalty and the masses, Yosef received accolades, honor, glory, and all the material benefits available at that time.

Yet he remained Yosef ben Yaakov Avinu.

Rav Miller points out how the allure of a nice non-Jewish culture is ironically what destroyed the Jewish people via assimilation.

He gives examples from America (page 8) and from Germany (page 9).

​Rav Miller recalls his visit to Germany just before yemach shemo took over in 1933.

Though Rav Miller was identifiably Jewish, an older German professor rushed over to help the young Rav Miller lift his suitcase on the train.

Such humility and a sincere desire to do chessed! What could go wrong?

Rav Miller recalls a country with no violence, a country that was so clean & law-abiding that no one even littered the streets. Even as a Jew, you could get an education, even a doctorate (as one former yeshivah bachur did, Rav Miller recalls).

Jews loved visiting pre-WWII Germany, a bastion of modernity & progress.

And look what happened in the end.

On page 10, Rav Miller exhorts:
“Don’t make any mistake about it,” Hashem was telling us. “It’s all shav v’sheker!” Like the medrash says: Eisav – what does Eisav mean?

הוי שוא
– How false he is!

​How false is the gentile culture! How false are their ideals and attitudes!

How false they themselves are!

And not only Germany – everywhere! 

No Inferiority Complex?

Rav Miller reminds us how many Jews got lost in America, Canada, England, and France.

Where are the Jews who came to American in the mid-1800s? Why don't we hear about them?

Why are so many of the Jews we know today only 2nd- or 3rd-generation Americans?

Vast amounts of Jews came to America over a century ago. Where are they now? Where are their descendants?

​Rav Miller explains that traditionally, Jews didn't have an inferiority complex.

They had fear of their non-Jewish countrymen.

Jews only knew of rabble-rousing when the rabble came pouring into their neighborhoods to make violent trouble.

​So the Jews had fear, but no feelings of inferiority.

Why Do Some Jews Hate Themselves More Than Non-Jews Hate Them?

But when Jews enter into non-Jewish society, they read and hear what that society thinks about them.

And suddenly, the Jew feels bad about himself.

Rav Miller explains why a Jew sometimes hates himself more than non-Jews hate him:

Non-Jews, even those who don't really like Jews, have other things to do. They have other things to think about.

But a Jew influenced by non-Jewish culture?

​Rav Miller explains:
 But the Jew who has now learned gentile attitudes is living with himself always – he can’t escape it and so he learns to despise himself, to hate his own people. 
It's so true.

Why is covering hair such a big nisayon for many Jewish women today?

Why is tsniyut (dressing & behaving with dignity) being bulldozed, with short skirts entering even the most insular communities (though not all of them, baruch Hashem)?

Who says that long clothing and wrapping up your hair is oppressive?

In many cultures throughout history, women covered their hair.

Outside of primitive cultures, women dressed tsniusly.

Today, even the most tsnius woman is not wearing as many layers or wearing the sheer lengths that chassidish men wear.

Some women go on diatribes against sheitels or hair-scarves.

But what about the chassidish men who wear a velvet kippah AND a fur shtreimel in the middle of summer in suffocatingly humid New York or the desert of Arad? 

Who's head-covering is more oppressive and more uncomfortable?

Yet who's complaining?

It's all attitudes from non-Jewish society.

Look at how even the most ultra-Orthodox Jews need to tiptoe around toeva, making sure that even in their rejection of the worst parts of it, they don't sound too judgmental.

If you journey throughout history, someone somewhere is always nitpicking at Judaism for one reason or another.

They polytheist cultures didn't like the exclusionism of One God.

Ancient Egyptians, who worshiped sheep, didn't like the Jewish practices of sheep-herding and dinners of grilled lamb chops. 

One Roman elitist criticized Jews for being too nice to slaves.

Greeks considered Jewish tsniyut (for both men & women) odd & backwards. They wanted to celebrate the human body by putting it on display. They took this so far, they considered brit milah a type of mutilation.

In fact, some Greek thinkers even considered the lack of idols and human statues in the Beit Hamikdash as "barbaric" and displaying a hatred of fellow humans. Weird, right?

Later, Jews were despised for killing a "god." (Yeah, talk about irrational contradictions.)

I was confronted with this accusation during Home Ec class in 7th grade. It was terrifying because I knew that no one would be on my side, what with blonde blue-eyed Tina insisting, "My pastor says that the Jews killed Jesus, not the Romans!"

Most of my classmates attended church, and respected the words of a pastor.

​So I felt it was me against over 20 others.

Fortunately, a black friend of mine named Valerye came to my defense, passionately asserting her pastor said it was indeed the Romans. 

Phew!

​Anyway, the list goes on.

​Rav Miller notes that even observant Jews look at fellow frummies through the eyes of non-Jewish values.

They don't see all the mitzvot being performed in frum homes; they see only the aspects criticized by their surrounding society.

But back to Yosef Hatzaddik...

Self-Love, Chanukah-Style

Yosef Hatzaddik didn't find lamb chops repulsive even though he'd been immersed for years in a society that worshiped sheep.

He also kept his brothers away from Egyptian influence even when they were in Egypt.

​Yosef Hatzaddik loved Hashem. He loved Am Yisrael, even when it was hardly an Am.

And that's the real message in Chanukah (page 17): 
And Chanukah tells us that great lesson, that beauty is only by us!

We always have to be on guard not to look for beauty and culture and perfection outside of our people.

​You have to fall in love with the Am Yisroel – that’s what Chanukah is telling us, that we have to fall in love with ourselves

Rav Miller's Great Passion

This is one of Rav Miller's big passions:

He kept praising frum Jews.

Yes, we all know there are bad ones. He knows it too; he mentioned them occasionally.

Frankly, I think this was his way of preventing another Shoah.

That's why he was so passionate about seeing fellow frummies in a positive light.

He vehemently opposed putting down other groups that were uncompromisingly shomer Torah & mitzvot, even when he didn't personally subscribe to their hashkafah. He only praised them no matter what.

He wanted Jews to burst with love for Hashem and each other and the Torah's mitzvot.

​He wanted Jews to serve Hashem with happy hearts.

This is what prevents Jew-hatred.

This is what hastens and sweetens the Geula.

Seeing ourselves, our Torah, and our God through positive eyes is the secret to Jewish survival.
Credit for all quotes goes to the wonderful Toras Avigdor.
0 Comments

The Netivot Shalom on How to Use the Loving & Joyful Power of Simchat Torah & Shemini Atzeret to Support You Throughout the Darkest Times of Your Life All Year Long

20/10/2019

0 Comments

 
Since coming to Eretz Yisrael, it took me several years to acclimate to the fact that all the final chagim land on one day at the end of Sukkot. Outside of Eretz Yisrael, they're 2 days.

Anyway, according to the wonderful book, Netivot Shalom, these final days of Simchat Torah & Shemini Atzeret comprise the real holiday of love: the Love of the Creator of the Universe for the Jewish people.

(Note: Everything in this post is taken from Netivot Shalom: Simchat Torah, Ma'amar 5, Ne'ilat HaChag.)

Netivot Shalom stresses that Hashem's Love always exists, but during this final autumn chag, Hashem's Love is revealed at its zenith.

This idea taken from the verse in Shir HaShirim, "the King brought me into His Chamber," describes the intimacy we have with Hashem during Sukkot, an intimacy that culminates in these final days.

Shemini Atzeret (a day unto itself outside of Eretz Yisrael, but the same day as Simchat Torah within Eretz Yisrael) is the day that "locks" up these autumn chagim.

We've made our final plea for rain and other blessings, we've received our final kvittel, the final seal on the upcoming year.

But why all the love & celebration?

Wouldn't it be better to end on the note of teshuvah?

Why, Netivot Shalom asks, do we end this time with such joy & love, rather than the teshuvah & atonement of Yom Kippur?

He explains:
Being that the rest of the year, many instances of material & spiritual darkness pass over a Jew, and the strengthening of many gloomy inclinations — the metaphorical aspect of the long nights of Tevet [the winteriest month-MR], which are so dark — therefore, The Holy One Blessed Be He gave a last day to lock up the Regalim (Pilgrimage Holidays), this holy chag Simchat Torah, which is an intimate time between Hashem and the Jewish people and within it is revealed the Ultimate Love of Hashem for the Jewish people.

This is so that a Jew can go out of these holy days with a clear feeling of the Love of the Blessed One, which is eternal in every situation — and this he should take with him for the rest of the year. 
In short, we end this period on the cusp of the darkest & gloomiest days of the year.

​While winter literally presents us with our darkest & gloomiest physical days, the above hints at the metaphorical interpretation of the spiritually dark & gloomy days that can occur any time throughout the continuing year.

Netivot Shalom adds:
It happens that even the sins & flaws cause "separating curtains" to appear and obstruct so that one cannot see the Love.

Yet because one believes that The Holy One Blessed Be He is always close to him, even when one doesn't feel it and one doesn't see it, then one believes it is now only "hiding."
Oncee a Jew has fully connected to Hashem in joy & love on Simchat Torah/Shemini Atzeret, this connection sustains him or her even through the times of darkness, both spiritual and physical darkness.

When we can't see or feel Hashem, the love & joy of these final days remind us that Hashem hasn't rejected or abandoned us; He is merely "hidden."

​Here's the rest:
Behold, this is the power that illuminates for a Jew throughout all the times of darkness of the year.

And a Jew needs to take this joy with him, that the engraving of Simchat Torah will remain within him all year long, enabling him to always feel HaKadosh Baruch Hu with him throughout all the situations of the material reality and the spiritual reality.

Hold on TIGHT!

In Hallel, which we recite on the chagim, we include the verse from Psalm 118:27 "issru chag ba'avotim ad karnot hamizbeyach" — which basically means taking strong cords to tie the offering to the Altar.

Yet there is a much deeper meaning too.

Netivot Shalom stresses that this time is a most auspicious time to purify one's heart & eyes.

This is a time to focus on shemirat einayim and shemirat halev.

The eyes notice the attractions of the world while the heart feels and ponders them.

This combination leads to sin.

But if we purify our eyes & hearts (especially by asking Hashem to help us with this now), then we save ourselves.

The trait of holiness is the most precious to Hashem.

When a Jew makes himself or herself holy, this grants the Jew special protection and blessings in the face of every kind & any kind of threat.

So Netivot Shalom encourages us to "bind the chag with strong cords, in all the opaque and worldly matters."

There is so much spiritual illumination throughout Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, and Simchat Torah & Shemini Atzeret.

Yet when it's all over, many people return to what they were before.

How can we prevent this?

"issru chag ba'avotim — bind the chag with strong cords!"

DON'T stay the same as you were before — take the spiritual illumination with you!

The Netivot Shalom quotes an Admor who said:
Thankful am I before You, O Lord My God and God of my Forefathers, for all the loving-kindness you have performed for me during these holy days that have passed. But it is the nature of a human that the day after the Yom Tov, he completely forgets what was.

Where was he the night before? And what was the movement of his thoughts? What were the requests of his heart at the moment he was dancing with the Torah: "Achat shaalti m'eit Hashem otah avakesh shivti b'veit Hashem kol yamei chayai — One thing I asked from Hashem, this I shall ask: that I shall dwell in the House of Hashem all the days of my life" [Tehillim 27:4].

About this, it's stated: "issru chag ba'avotim" — to bind the chag with strong cords so that it won't slip from between his hands, and so that it will remain engraved from the Yom Tov for all the year.
Everyone faces different situations at this time of year.

There can be ups and downs throughout this day (or especially two days). 

But whatever joy and closeness to Hashem we can manage, we need to hold onto it as tight as we can because this is what sustains us throughout the rest of the year.
Picture
The above translation is mine and therefore any errors are also mine.
0 Comments

What's Behind the Final Days of Sukkot?

16/10/2019

4 Comments

 
According to the Netivot Shalom (which is based on fundamental sources), every single thing in Creation (including YOU) is renewed on Rosh Hashanah.

This renewal gives us the ability to make deep, long-lasting changes.

You literally become a new creation.

Then Yom Kippur cleanses us of sin.

Yet it can be disheartening as Sukkot comes around and you find that the new you is suddenly disintegrating into some old & unwanted patterns.

This is particularly distressing if you had a particularly transformative Elul-Rosh Hashanah-Yom Kippur and you really felt you'd done the work necessary, including the correct emotional internalization (i.e., you really do regret your sins & set out a plan to improve — a plan you genuinely enjoy).

The thing is, there is a Zohar that the end of Sukkot, Hoshana Rabbah, grants you your last chance. It's your final judgement.

This is the time when Jews wish a Piska Taba (Aramaic) or a Gut Kvittel (Yiddish), both of which mean "a good note." Like a final slip of paper, this can be last evidence to save the person in their trial.

I can't help noticing that, with all the delights of Sukkot, there tend to be some real challenges too.

Yes, it's easy to dismiss it all as the kids being on vacation, everyone's off schedule, hosting guests or being guests, plus lots of chag-Shabbat and meal-planning, and so on with all the derech-hateva stuff.

Some people also need to make do with very cramped or hot sukkahs (which can still be very pretty, but just not as comfortable to sit or sleep in).

And some people's jobs force them to work during chol hamoed while other people face the (hopefully worthwhile) chaos of traveling and outings.

Yet I can't help noticing that Sukkot usually brings me certain situations in which I tend to fail.

Sometimes, I face very odd nisayonot that seem so out of character, especially during Sukkot.

Putting 2 & 2 together, I realized that it must be Hashem giving a last chance to get it right.

(Or at least somewhat right.)

Maybe He's also giving me the opportunity to fully express the new me.

So if you're finding yourself in odd or stressful situations, situations that make you ask, "Why is this happening to me? And why davka NOW?" — this could be the reason.

One final point: While it's best to master a nisayon, we all know that it often doesn't work like that in real life with non-tzaddikim.

Sometimes, we feel like we totally failed.

But really, if we handled it just a bit better than we ever did before, that makes a huge impression in Shamayim.

What looks like an imperceptible step in This World shows up as a massive leap in the Upper Worlds.
Picture
4 Comments

Rav Avigdor Miller on Everything to Do With Yom Kippur, including Breaking the Fast Motzaei Yom Kippur, Plus the #1 Focus for Yom Kippur

8/10/2019

0 Comments

 
Please see Rav Avigdor Miller's answer to the question:
What should we think about on the night after Yom Kippur? 
​(Meaning, when you break the fast.)

On the same topic, please see Rav Itamar Schwartz on:
Motza'ei Yom Kippur: Go Eat Your Bread with Joy
And please also see Rav Avigdor Miller's answer to this all-important question:
What does it really mean when we ask for life for "Your Sake"? (L'ma'ancha Elokim Chaim)
And now we come to Rav Avigdor Miller's big lecture for Yom Kippur:
Rav Avigdor Miller on Yom Kippur: Asking for Life

Note #1: It's very worth reading the original at that link. Because of the long summary here, it looks like you're getting the dvar Torah here, but really, so much is missing. Please read the delicious original.​

​Note #2: All boldface emphasis & words in square brackets [] are mine.

YOU are the Prime Witness in a Case of Universal Importance!

Rav Miller lauds the greatness of doing mitzvot, but encourages us to take our frumkeit up to the next level.

Even learning Torah isn't enough if it's only an intellectual exercise. 

Rav Miller points out that Yeravam ben Nevat, Achitophel, and Doeg Ha’edomi were all great talmidei chachamim.

Yet they lost their portion in the World to Come.

"So we see it’s possible to be a big talmid chacham and to miss the entire point of doing mitzvos," says Rav Miller. 

Yes indeed.

​So what's the solution?
The solution is found in Yeshayahu 43:10:
"Atem edai neum Hashem - You are My witnesses, says Hashem."

We, the Jewish people, are Hashem's witnesses.

And what do witnesses do?

They testify!

They tell the facts of what they see.

Rav Miller elaborates:
And that’s our purpose – we have to speak up about Hakadosh Baruch Hu in the world.

That’s our job, to talk about Hashem. Not only in shul. You have to talk about Him with your family. At the dinner table you must speak about Hashem.

And if nobody wants to listen, they say, “we heard it already”, then talk to yourself; but you must talk.

Print up fliers and spread it in the world. I have beautiful fliers if anybody wants.

Anybody who wants fliers about Hashem, I’ll give them to you for five cents apiece. That’s how much I paid for them. Print a thousand of them as you wish and distribute them.

Why not? אתם עדי, you’re My witnesses.

​You have to speak about Hashem!

Who Needs to Sing Hashem's Praises? EVERYONE. No Exceptions.​

Leah Imeinu prophesied about Yehudah as the progenitor of Mashiach.

"This time, I'm going to praise Hashem," said Leah when she named Yehudah, which carries the root for Hashem's 4-letter name, plus the words for "thank" and "confess."

Then Rav Miller points out that Leah's descendant via Yehudah was David Hamelech. And who sang praises to Hashem more than David Hamelech, what with all the Tehillim?

As Rav Miller put it, David Hamelech lived a life of singing songs to Hashem — and that's what Leah Imeinu foresaw when she named Yehudah.

Yes, this is a very special tafkid of the Jewish people, who are mostly from Shevet Yehudah today with a few from the sons of Rachel Imeinu (so says Rav Miller).

But we know from our davening that ki ken chovat kol hayetzurim — singing praises of Hashem is the duty of all those created by Hashem (which is everyone, obviously).

​Rav Miller explains:
And the gentile world understand this also.

They used to sing the psalms, the shirei Dovid, in all their gentile places...

***

What we’re learning now is that everybody in the world has to praise Hashem.

Black people have to spend time praising Hashem. Eskimos must get together and praise Hashem. South Sea Islanders, Chinese, must praise Hashem.

​If not, they’re guilty.

How to Achieve that Overflowing Cup

Several sources in Judaism (Tehillim being one) speak of "overflow."

Your cup can overflow. (And that's a good thing!)

How?

First of all, your cup should not have a hole in the bottom.

If it does, then all the Goodness of Hashem gets drained down into that hole.

Secondly, in addition to your hole-less cup, you should allow Hashem's Goodness to keep pouring in.

Rav Miller explains that this is the secret to a happy heart.

Remember the car that almost hit you? Nearly everyone has a story like that. This is mine:
​When I was in elementary school, I was walking for the first time (usually, I took the school bus) with a friend to her home.

For some reason, rather than crossing the street to get closer to her street, we continued walking on the same side of the road through a gravelly ditch.

We both realized we weren't behaving logically and we kept looking to the other side of the road, knowing we should really be over there. 

Suddenly, a car appeared out of nowhere, lost control, and zoomed over the side of the road directly across from us —​ meaning, the exact place we SHOULD have been.

Without missing a beat, the car righted itself back into its lane and kept on zooming away.

We stared in shock at the place we should have been, then whipped our heads around to look at each other. Then we started exclaiming about the miracle that had occurred.

(Despite us both being relatively secular, we instinctively understood that we'd experienced a miraculous salvation.)

It's also interesting that she was one of the only Jewish students at our elementary school, and that this event occurred to us together.

Thank You, Hashem! Yishtabach Shemo!
​Rav Miller also reminds us of those minor yet irritating illnesses that seem to hang around forever. 

I've had that too: the cough that just won't shake, the prolonged back pain, the eternally stuffy nose...and then one day, they're gone!

We're grateful for a moment, then it's life as usual.

But no, Rav Miller emphasizes that we should be REALLY grateful. And then keep on feeling that gratitude.

Furthermore, if there is anything in our body that works right, we must be grateful for it. (Think of the asher yatzar bracha, for example.) It's easy to forget what life would be like if one were dependent on a kidney dialysis machine to clear one's kidneys or on a colostomy to clear one's bowels, may Hashem please keep us all in excellent health.

And once our heart is filled with gratitude & joy, it naturally overflows to others.

What is Our Main Purpose on Yom Kippur?

Yom Kippur is the day where we nullify ourselves to Hashem.

THIS is what cleanses us from our sins & sweetens our New Year.

In Woman's World: Teshuvah, Rav Itamar Schwartz points out that even the happy mitzvah of eating Erev Yom Kippur is so that we have the koach and focus to pray & nullify ourselves properly on Yom Kippur itself.

Even people who fast so terribly that they must lie in bed rather than pray are nullifying themselves to Hashem. (I'm not talking about life-endangering fasting, which demands drinking or eating, but weakness-inducing fasting.) Yom Kippur is the only fast that makes such demands on people. And that's why: We nullify our bodily desires and our emotional desires to Hashem's Desires.

So on Yom Kippur we bow a lot.

And we speak to Hashem the entire time, whether in formal prayer, formal Confession, or with our own words.

​Rav Miller reminds us:
And that’s the argument, the fundamental argument, that everyone should use on Yom Kippur, only he must be aware of the obligation that this entails for him. לא המתים יהללוי-ה, the dead will not praise Hashem, ולא כל ירדי דומה, and not those who go down into silence.

Death is called silence. Why is that?

Death is a lot of things, but is silence the one that is most important?

And the answer is yes, absolutely. Because the dead are not without life. Dead have eternal life, they’re still living.

But they have lost the opportunity to utilize their free will for this great function of singing praises to Hashem.

They have gone down into silence, they’ve lost the gift of speech, a glorious gift.
It's much more difficult in This World to praise Hashem and to be grateful for all that we have.

There's a heavy curtain over the spiritual reality of This World.

So we get tremendous reward for opening our mouths within the darkness underneath that smothering curtain & singing our praise of Hashem.

TREMENDOUS reward.

How to Avoid Korach's Fate

Around three-fourths of the way through this dvar Torah, Rav Miller provides a scary description of Korach and his followers in Gehinnom.

He also reminds us that Korah and his followers believed in Hashem 100%! They also shouted "Na'aseh v'nishma!" And They merited to be among the 20% who left Egypt.

So what happened?

​Rav Miller states that even great tzaddikim need to watch out for any tendency toward unhealthy jealousy.

​And here's how regular people like us can utilize this idea:
​How important it is for all of us to say in this lifetime משה אמת ותורתו אמת [Moshe Emet v'Torato Emet - Moshe is Truth and his Torah is Truth].

Because then, in the cemetery, it’s too late. You’ll realize it then. Absolutely you’ll realize it, but it will be too late.

So people who speak against Gedolei Yisrael, who speak against tzaddikim, have to realize it’s very dangerous business.

Hakadosh Baruch Hu wants us to speak in honor of the Torah, in honor of the Torah leaders.

And we have to be praising all our lives; not only do we praise Hashem but part of the function of תהילת השם [tehilat Hashem] is to praise Hashem’s Torah and to praise the teachers of Torah.

When people get together in synagogues before the prayer begins and they talk among themselves, it’s a moshev leitzim [a gathering of scoffers - from Psalm 1].

Instead of opening a sefer, or at least keeping their mouths shut, they criticize the rabbi, they criticize talmidei chachamim.

That’s Korach!  Just like Korach in his generation, they’re Korach in this generation, and they have to be aware of a terrible fate that is waiting for them.

Hashem says you want another year from Me? I want a promise from you that this year is going to be a year of speaking up in My honor, in honor of talmidei chachomim, in honor of the frum Jews – and the more frum, the more praises.

You have to speak in praise of Hashem and His people.

Be a Secret Propagandist for God!

Rav Miller quotes Shaarei Teshuvah (The Gates of Repentance):
"All of the creatures were created only for one purpose, for kavod Shamayim" (to give honor to Hashem).

Before you go out where you'll meet other people, Rav Miller recommends you do your best to contemplate & answer the following questions (or at least 1 of them):

  • What can I do at that time to increase the honor of Hashem? 
  • What can I say in honor of Hashem?
  • What can I say in honor of His Torah?
  • What can I say in honor of avodas Hashem (serving Hashem)?
  • What can I say in honor of the people who study Torah?

(Personally, I'd assume this applies to writers, speakers, bloggers, etc. as well.)

Rav Miller offers some concrete suggestions which include, but are certainly not limited to:
  • Speak in honor of frum Jews.
  • Speak in honor of chassidim.
  • Speak in honor of Lakewood.
  • Speak in honor of Meah Shearim.
  • Speak in honor of all the ovdei Hashem wherever they are.
  • Speak in honor of talmidei chachamim.
  • Speak how good it is to be a medakdeik in mitzvos.
  • Inspire people. 
  • Stand on the street and hand out fliers about avodas Hashem. 

Now, because the secular-influenced social norm regarding being all sunny about Jews and Judaism is considered "covering up the truth" and all that, I want to point out that having lived among all types of different frum groups, I can certainly tell you the failings in each group, whether it's according to ethnicity, nationality, or hashkafah.

And unfortunately, there are Jewish media & Jewish websites dedicated to not only pointing out these flaws, but magnifying them & even exaggerating these flaws to the point that they actually LIE (whether by omission or by addition). 

It's worth noting that according to the Chafetz Chaim, the actual laws of lashon hara state that even when you are permitted to say lashon hara, you must only do so with the purest of intentions (i.e., no malice or revenge intended) and you must not embellish. There are other conditions too, and each situation needs to be examined individually with expertise in this area of Jewish Law.

But these frum communities also contain tremendous positives.

Sure, if you have to focus on a negative aspect in order to eliminate it, then that's the same as focusing on a stain to cleanse a garment.

But most of the people calling attention to stains within the frum communities don't actually do anything to remove those stains.

​(Yes, they CLAIM that's what they are doing with all their calls to action, but please notice that all their declarations & accusations don't actually help things one whit. It's all talk and posturing, even if they sincerely think they're doing something productive. The people who are actually doing good are not screaming about it, but they're getting their hands dirty and scrubbing through the stains.)

​So that's why I'm not presenting the negatives. I can daven to Hashem about fixing the negatives, but I'd rather not bellow about them from this blog as if the negatives outweigh the positives.

Anyway, Hashem really doesn't like it when people overemphasize the negative. That's not how a loving Jew behaves.

And even though every person in the world in obligated to praise Hashem, we Jews have been charged with a special mission to praise Hashem.

​Each Jew is a special agent of Hashem.

What was So Powerful about the Ketoret?

Rav Miller discusses the Ketoret Offering at length.

But in short, the beautiful Ketoret aroma had the power to inspire within a person feelings of love & admiration for Hashem.

​And that led to the power of Ketoret, like stopping plagues, and the like.

That's one of the big things we are missing today.

Saying Parshat HaKetoret (found in every Orthodox prayerbook) with heartfelt kavanah can harness some of the power of Ketoret today.

How to REALLY Sweeten Life for Everyone

In sum, our big goal for this coming year is to praise Hashem & anything related to Hashem.

And that's exactly what merits us a new lease on life.

It's what merits us a sweetening of din.

It's what merits us a better & sweeter year, b'ezrat Hashem.
As always, all quotes are credited to Toras Avigdor, may they merit a sweet year for all the ways they benefit the Jewish People.
P.S. I'm not familiar with Rav Miller's posters. I managed to find this, but I'm not sure if it's Rav Miller's creation, or someone created it using Rav Miller's ideas. Either way, it's a nice poster!
Picture
This is a direct quote from Rav Shalom Arush. This has also been chosen as my Rav Avigdor Miller poster.
0 Comments

The 2 Most Important Ideas to Remember for Rosh Hashanah

29/9/2019

0 Comments

 
There are 2 vital ideas to remember for Rosh Hashanah (these also apply to the time period throughout Yom Kippur & Sukkot).

And the second is merely an aspect of the first.

The first is as Rav Avigdor Miller emphasized in his Rosh Hashanah shuirim:

Rosh Hashanah is the time to focus on & internalized EIN OD MILVADO —​ THERE IS NOTHING IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE EXCEPT HASHEM.

Internalizing this all-important emuna is the intrinsic focus of Rosh Hashanah.

If you do nothing else Rosh Hashanah, you must at least do that.

Rebbetzin Batsheva Kanievsky used to recommend that people say "Ein od milvado" with all the heartfelt kavanah they could muster as a segula for being saved from whatever troubles they suffered.

From Rav Chaim Volozhin's book, Nefesh Hachaim:
When a person determines in his heart to say that Hashem surely is the True God, and there is none other than Him Yitbarach, no power in the world and in any of the worlds at all, and all is filled only with His Simple Oneness Yitbarach Shemo, and nullifies within his heart complete nullification that he [the person] doesn't supervise at all any power and will in the world, and subserviates and cleaves the purity of his thought only to the Unique Master Blessed be He — then He Yitbarach will satisfy his hand and will automatically nullify from upon him [the person] all the powers and wills that exist in the world, so they cannot do anything at all to him.

And everything that he [the person] decrees will be fulfilled for him, to activate matters and wondrous miracles in contradiction to the natural order...
In the siddur Ahuvah L'Tzaddik, it explains that accepting upon oneself Hashem's Total Mastery over the entire Universe will remove & nullify from a person all judgement and other wills, so that nothing else can overpower him or control him at all. (This siddur is also from where I copied the above passage from Nefesh Hachaim. Any mistakes in translation are mine.)

Staying Sweet When Things Have Soured: A True Story

The famed mekubal Rav Yehudah Petiyah sat at the table one Rosh Hashanah with his family and guests.

The rav wore pure white garments in honor of the special day.

A candelabra lit in honor of the chag stood on the table.

Everything was set up according to his profound knowledge of holy standards.

The rabbanit was just bringing out a whole tray of fish to start the main meal when someone bumped the table in a way that overturned the lights, plunging the entire room into darkness.

(In our times, it's hard for us to imagine the depth of darkness without electric lights in the home and without electric streetlights along the road outside.)

The rabbanit could not see where she was going or where to put the heavy unwieldy tray, plus the sudden turn of events startled her, and the tray slipped from her hands, plunging all the specially prepared fish to the ground.

The rav rose to assist and fix the problem, but he slipped in the all the fish jelly and sauces, falling smack to the ground, which soiled his special white garments.

You can imagine what this all meant, and how hard it is to get the fish smell out of things and how bad fish smells when it hangs around for too long.

Furthermore, I don't know whether the Petiyahs had indoor plumbing. Were they still in Baghdad or had they already arrived in Eretz Yisrael? It doesn't say, but the clean-up of both the floor and the rav using pump-water must have been difficult, particularly in the dark (though they likely had some light from the stove). 

Rosh Hashanah is 2 days and that meant that the rav likely had no more special white garments for the rest of the chag. Not to mention the loss of the fish...

Yet Rav Yehudah Petiyah did not get angry.
Interestingly, that year ended up being a splendid year for Rav Yehudah Petiyah.

He experienced success with everything he attempted. He found increased success in his Torah, producing new & wonderful chiddushim.

And he traced back all that success to not getting angry over the disaster of that first night of Rosh Hashanah.

The REAL Segula for a Sweet Year — ​And It's Not the Apples Dipped in Honey...It's YOU.

The above story is found in Rav Elimelech Biderman's Be'er Haparsha.

He emphasizes that the most powerful segulah on Rosh Hashanah for having a sweet year is...BE A YEHUDI MATOK -- BE A SWEET JEW.

​If we turn around Rav Petiyah's situation, we see that in Heaven, he already had a sweet year decreed for him...he just needed to earn it.

And the way he was meant to earn it was by having someone knock over his Rosh Hashanah lights, ruin his fish, fall down (which must have hurt at least a little), and get soaked in a big fishy mess that ruined his special white garments -- all without getting angry.

And that could be the dynamic for any of us.
If you're reading this after Rosh Hashanah, don't despair.

I've noticed that Hashem gives us our final chances to get things right during Sukkot, before the din is decided in its finality. Lots of challenges still pop up throughout this time.

The main thing is to resist getting angry about them. (And here, I'm writing this for myself as much as for anyone else.)

​They're from Hashem & possibly the key to giving you a wonderfully sweet year.

So to sum it all up:
  1. Do everything you can to internalize the idea that there is nothing other than Hashem.
  2. Don't get angry no matter what.

May we all be sweet Jews who merit a very sweet year!
Picture
For more on the holy Rav Yehudah Petiyah, please see the blog posts under the category Minchat Yehudah (or just click on those boldfaced underlined teal letters).
0 Comments

How to Become Exceptional in 10 Minutes: Rav Avigdor Miller's Rosh Hashanah Advice

24/9/2019

0 Comments

 
In Words of Faith, Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender cautions us against falling into the trap of the "frum" yetzer hara.

The "frum" yetzer hara seems very pious in his negative evaluations of any mitzvah we do.

Nothing is ever good enough.

And while it's true that maybe we didn't daven with so much kavanah, this oh-so pious yetzer hara sucks any joy we feel out of the mitzvah.

Furthermore, he makes us feel like Torah & mitzvot are too hard, that we'll never perform any mitzvah "well enough," and then he convinces us...why bother? It's not worth even trying.

And that's the killer clause of the pious yetzer hara.

When 5+5 equals 1 in 10,000

So we must defeat this oh-so seemingly pious yetzer hara by listening to what our real talmidei chachamim say about baby steps.

They for sure know better than even your frummest yetzer hara.

In a recently transcribed lecture Rav Avigdor Miller on 10 Minutes to Make You Great, Rav Miller tells us to spend 10 minutes in preparation for the New Year, for Rosh Hashanah.

And what do we do in those 10 minutes?

  • Spend 5 minutes thinking about all the good Hashem did for you over this past year.
  • Spend 5 minutes creating resolutions for the coming year.

If you do this, then Rav Miller considers you "great;" you're head and shoulders above the rest.
Those ten minutes will be a great accomplishment.

If after sitting here...you’ll go out and think for five minutes, you should know that you’re an exception. You’re a dagul mei’rivavah – you’re one out of ten thousand. 

There’s nobody like you.

Who thinks for five whole minutes about gratitude for Hashem for the past year?!

And who thinks for five minutes about making resolutions for improving himself in the coming year?! People talk about it. But that’s all.

That’s why I said in the beginning of our talk, that if you do this on a small scale, then you shoot up and your head is way above everybody else.

TAPE #138 (September 1976)
Toras Avigdor
If you've been visiting Toras Avigdor or listening to Rav Miller's shiurim, then you know that here's a Jew who does not mince words.

Especially when it comes to avodat Hashem, Rav Miller is straight as they come.

And while I think that they whole frum awakening toward gratitude and thanking Hashem has picked up since 1976, there are, tragically, enough assimilated Jews and enough by-rote Jews that you really stand out with those 10 minutes.

And the more of us who take these 10 minutes to thank Hashem for all the good of the past year while making specific resolutions for the coming year, the more we can sweeten din and reap blessing for ourselves and others.
Picture
0 Comments

AMAZING New Video from Rav Miller for Tisha B'Av, Plus Rav Avigdor Miller in Español.

7/8/2019

0 Comments

 
Toras Avigdor just came out with a special Tisha B'Av video of Rav Avigdor Miller explaining what this week and that day are all about.

And it's...WOW.

Just a couple of tidbits:
​Thinking about the Churban means thinking about how we can strive for excellence.

Striving for excellence means loving ALL real talmidei chachamim EVEN IF THEY'RE NOT FROM "YOUR" GROUP.

Rav Miller acknowledges that some people feel a lot of zeal and think they have good reason to scoff at another group's Gadol, but DON'T.

  • Don't get into machloket with fellow frum Jews. 
  • Stand behind your Rav.
  • Stand behind your Rebbe.
  • Stand behind your Rosh Yeshivah.
  • But DON'T let your loyalty toward your own group turn into disdain for another FRUM group!

He makes the excellent point that widely read non-Jewish newspapers and Jewish assimilationists relish machloket among frum Jews.

We've all seen how quickly a story about machloket between frum Jews makes it into the media.

Why don't we see that about Sikhs? Or Bhuddists? Or Hindus?

Even in Eretz Yisrael, where Yishmaelite machloket gets REALLY out of hand, the secular Israeli either doesn't publish it or they write about in a way that makes you think they're regular Israelis, when it was, say, a Yishmaelite honor killing.

But FRUM machloket? Oh, man...they really rev up for that.

Rav Miller also discusses real ahavat Yisrael in a way I hadn't heard before.

So please click the following to see this powerful video:
​https://torasavigdor.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Nine-Days-Video.mp4

Also, for any of you Spanish-speakers, I see that a Toras Avigdor Q&A is available in ESPAÑOL.

Please click here to download the Spanish PDF:
Toras Avigdor Español

I'm not sure exactly how to sign up for the Spanish, but you can contact them and ask (they're very pleasant & get back to you in a timely manner):
https://torasavigdor.org/contact/

​Enjoy!
0 Comments

Rav Avigdor Miller on Making Ma'amad Har Sinai Real & Relevant (including tips on how to REALLY utilize da'as Torah, plus some healthy rebuke for writers & podcasters)

6/6/2019

0 Comments

 
Rav Miller’s dvar Torah on Parshat Bamidbar: Forever at Har Sinai arrived in my inbox this morning.

And even though that’s not the parsha for Eretz Yisrael right now (we’re on Parshat Nasso), it vital reading for Shavuot because it’s all about Shavuot.

(Note: If you're in Eretz Yisrael, you can contact them to receive your weekly parsha: ey@torasavigdor.org. They also have a well-done Junior supplement alongside the dvar Torah. If you work with children and you need the Junior supplement earlier in the week or you need it in Yiddish, you can contact them: info@torasavigdor.org.) 

Envisioning Ma'amad Har Sinai

PictureElishama & Ephraim at Ma'amad Har Sinai!
​The Kav Hayashar states that upon waking in the morning, one should envision the Giving of the Torah at Har Sinai in his head, and with that powerful imagery, you should then say, “Modeh ani.”
 
That’s quite a way to start the morning!
 
I don’t know about you, but envisioning Ma’amad Har Sinai is difficult for me and so it ends up with the colorful illustrations from the children’s book, Elishama & Ephraim at Ma’amad Har Sinai.
 
(This is a wonderful book from a wonderful series, by the way.)
 
Anyway, reading Rav Miller’s dvar Torah for Parshat Bamidbar helps a lot with envisioning Ma’amad Har Sinai.

The Right Way to Elicit Daas Torah

Rav Miller also delves into the importance of asking real da’as Torah, in addition to addressing the confusions people have about daas Torah.

For example, there is a difference between sketching out a whole plan to show a talmid chacham and THEN asking for his approval, in contrast to asking him an open-ended question (“What should I do?”) before you even start.
 
People like to say they have haskamos from big people, but there is a difference between consulting a talmid chacham beforehand and requesting cursory approval after the fact.

​So Rav Miller delves into that a bit, providing helpful clarification to those of us who don’t know what’s happening behind the scenes.
 
He emphasizes the fact that people don’t ask gedolim regarding, say, what school is best for your child. (And to be forthright, we didn’t think to do that either.)
 
But I have a friend who did.

Admission Woes with a Happy Ending

​My friend was a Sephardi chutznikit who couldn’t get her son into neither the Sephardi schools nor the Ashkenazi schools in her area.
 
And even though she was downhearted and frustrated about the whole issue, rather than railing about discrimination and religious hypocrisy, she decided to go to one of Israel’s English-speaking Sages, Rav Chaim Pinchas Scheinberg ztz"l, instead.
 
He was sympathetic and pleasantly asked her if she would consider the Chabad school in her area? (Please note that he did not command her to do so, but asked her.)
 
His answer surprised her. For some reason, she hadn’t considered Chabad, despite the fact that she’d attended Chabad summer camps and shuls as a child and held warm fuzzy feelings toward Chabad.
 
“Yes, I would,” she answered.
 
Then he pleasantly suggested that she try them and see how it goes.
 
Chabad easily accepted her son and as the family developed over time, I saw that it was best for her children there, rather than in the other schools in the area.
 
And even though at the outset, it looked like the mainstream Ashkenazi and Sephardi schools were nitpicking at the family (a family which actually had some chashivut in her country of origin), it was actually Hashem’s way of ensuring that her children received the chinuch best for them.
 
And if you’re wondering how a Mirrer Litvak like Rav Scheinberg could recommend a school of Lubavitcher chassidus to a Sephardi family, I’d just point out that real gedolim genuinely care about Jewish children and their chinuch, and also someone on his level totally lacks sinat chinam. So there you go.

Personal Greatness vs Intellectual Greatness

​Also, the dvar Torah ends with a Q&A, where Rav Miller is asked: How are we to determine which talmid chochom has the right Torah attitudes in order to attach ourselves to the right person? And if he has wrong Torah attitudes what should we do about it?
 
It’s not the first time he has addressed this issue. (Please see Which Rabbi Should I Listen To? and More Tips on How to Recognize a Real Gadol Hador for more.)
 
And he’s one of the only people I’ve seen do so.
 
It’s really important because sometimes you can meet a rabbi who, on the surface, seems to fit the description of a talmid chacham—but really, he’s not personally great.

​Some people possess brilliant intellect and if they weren’t frum, they’d be esteemed professors of philosophy at some hotshot university, or they’d be part of an elitist think tank, and so on.
 
So they have the Gemara in their head, but not necessarily their heart.
 
Internalizing the Jewish concepts you learn is a real avodah incumbent upon every Jew, as Rav Miller frequently emphasizes.

Incompetent Writers, Half-Baked Torah Scholars, and Self-Declared Authorities...Oh, My!

​Finally, Rav Miller gives major criticism regarding Jewish media. At the time of his constructive rebuke, there was only print media, no blogs.

​But it’s definitely giving me food for thought because I believe his critique applies equally to bloggers.
 
Here’s Rav Miller:
​In the newspapers today, the Jewish newspapers, there are people who are incompetent; writers, half-baked Torah scholars, self-declared authorities, who answer every kind of question.

Some are dangerous questions, things that could not be discussed in public without harm; things that need a great deal of deliberation.

And anybody with a typewriter rushes in where gedolim fear to tread, and they not only offer their opinions, but they publicize them with fanfare, as valid Torah opinions.

Almost every newspaper has a page--sometimes more than one page—for every ploni almoni to give his opinion.

Who cares what he thinks?! Did he learn Mesillas Yesharim many times?! Did he learn the Chovos Halevavos from cover to cover? Sha’arei Teshuva l’Rabeinu Yonah? The Rambam Hilchos Teshuva? Who are you to voice an opinion b’rabim?

It’s only the Voice of Hashem that we care about—the Voice we heard at Har Sinai--the same Voice that Moshe Rabeinu heard in the Mishkan, and the Voice that we continue to hear from the ba’alei hamesorah, the ones who pass down to us the Torah true attitudes and ideals--that’s the only Voice we want to hear.

Even if someone could quote one authority, but there are many others who may differ with that one sefer which he quotes.

If we would rely on an individual opinion, we would be in a sorry state. It’s only the gedolim who are able to collate the different opinions. They’re the ones who are competent to choose.

Many times, even when one opinion is intrinsically correct, but it has to be weighed carefully.

​And it’s only those who have the fear of Har Sinai in them who can be trusted to make decisions--even those that do not seem significant—for Klal Yisroel.
“Anybody with a typewriter rushes in where gedolim fear to tread…”
 
I suppose that nowadays, it could read: “Anybody with a keyboard and an Internet connection…”

Or maybe: "Anybody with recording equipment and a YouTube account..."
May Hashem renew our days (and our souls!) as they were before.
Picture
Thank you to Toras Avigdor for all their hafatzah and permission.
0 Comments
<<Previous
    Help a frum family get their children back!:
    http://www.myrtlerising.com/blog/please-help-frum-family-under-attack-from-esav
    Picture
    Please note this is an affiliate link. Meaning, I get a small cut but at NO extra cost to you. If you use it, I'm grateful. If not, you still get a giant mitzvah connected to Eretz Yisrael.

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

    Myrtle Rising

    I'm a middle-aged housewife and mother in Eretz Yisrael who likes to read and write a lot.

    Picture
    Sample Chapters

    Categories

    All
    Aliyah
    Anti Jewish Bigotry
    Astronomy
    Book Review
    Books
    Chagim/Holidays
    Chinuch
    Coronavirus
    Dictionaries
    Emuna
    Eretz Yisrael
    Erev Rav
    Gender
    Hitbodedut
    "If The Torah..."
    Jewish Astrology
    Kav Hayashar
    Kli Yakar
    Lashon Hara
    Love
    Minchat Yehudah
    Mishlei/Proverbs
    Netivot Shalom
    Parenting
    Parsha
    Pele Yoetz
    Perek Shira
    Pesach
    Politics
    Prayer
    Purim
    Rav Avigdor Miller
    Rav Itamar Schwartz
    Rav L.Y. Bender
    Recipes
    "Regular" Jews
    Rosh Hashanah
    Society
    Sukkot
    Tammuz
    Technology
    Tehillim/Psalms
    Teshuvah
    The Lost Princess
    USA Scary Direction
    Women
    Yom Kippur

    Jewish Blogs

    Daf Yomi Review
    Derech Emet
    Going...Habayitah
    Halacha Q&A
    Hava haAharona
    Lazer Beams
    Miriam Adahan
    My Perspective
    Shirat Devorah
    Shuvu Banim
    Spiritual Coaching
    Tomer Devorah
    Toras Avigdor
    True Tzaddikim
    Tznius Blog
    Yeranen Yaakov
    Rabbi Ofer Erez (English)
    Rabbi Ofer Erez (Hebrew lectures)

    Jewish Current Events

    Hamodia
    Lemon Lime Moon
    Shuvu Banim
    Sultan Knish
    Tomer Devorah
    Yeranen Yaakov

    Jewish Health

    Jewish Emotional Health Institute
    Heliotrope Holistic Health Services

    Archives

    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015

    RSS Feed

    Copyright Notice

    ©2015-2020 Myrtle Rising
    Excerpts and links may be used without express permission as long as a link is provided back to the appropriate Myrtle Rising page.
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
Photos used under Creative Commons from Brett Jordan, BAMCorp, Terrazzo, Abode of Chaos, Michele Dorsey Walfred, marklordphotography, M.Burak Erbaş, torbakhopper, jhritz, Rina Pitucci (Tilling 67), Svadilfari, kum111, Tim simpson1, FindYourSearch, Giorgio Galeotti, ChrisYunker, Jaykhuang, YourCastlesDecor, bluebirdsandteapots, Natalia Medd, Stefans02, ElleFlorio, Israel_photo_gallery, Commander, U.S. 7th Fleet, BradPerkins, zeevveez, dfarrell07, h.koppdelaney, Edgardo W. Olivera, nafrenkel88, zeevveez, mtchlra, Liz | populational, TraumaAndDissociation, thinboyfatter, garofalo.christina, skpy, Free Grunge Textures - www.freestock.ca, Nerru, Gregory "Slobirdr" Smith, trendingtopics, dolbinator1000, DonkeyHotey, zeevveez, erix!, zeevveez, h.koppdelaney, MAURO CATEB, kevin dooley, keepitsurreal, annikaleigh, bjornmeansbear, publicdomainphotography, Leonard J Matthews, Exile on Ontario St, Nicholas_T, marcoverch, planman, PhilWolff, j_lai, t.kunikuni, zeevveez, Ian W Scott, Brett Jordan, RonAlmog, Bob Linsdell, NASA Goddard Photo and Video, aaron_anderer, ** RCB **, Tony Webster, mypubliclands, r0sita, AntonStetner, Zachi Evenor, MrJamesBaker, sammydavisdog, Frode Ramone, Wonder woman0731, wrachele, kennethkonica, Skall_Edit, Pleuntje, Rennett Stowe, *S A N D E E P*, symphony of love, AlexanderJonesi, Arya Ziai, ePublicist, Enokson, Tony Webster, Art4TheGlryOfGod, seaternity, Andrew Tarvin, zeevveez, Israel_photo_gallery, Iqbal Osman1, Matt From London, Tribes of the World, Eric Kilby, miracle design, RonAlmog, slgckgc, Kim Scarborough, DonkeyHotey, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, h.koppdelaney, gleonhard, Pedro Travassos, nociveglia, RonAlmog, Israel_photo_gallery, Septemia, Paulann_Egelhoff, Tatiana12, MAD Hippies Life, Aleteia Image Partners, Neta Bartal, milesgehm, shooting brooklyn, RonAlmog, smilygrl, gospelportals, leighblackall, symensphotographie, zeevveez, Kyknoord, wotashot (taking a break), Tambako the Jaguar, bitmask, Arnie Sacknooson, mattymatt, Rob Swystun, zeevveez, Dun.can, Tim Patterson, timeflicks, garlandcannon, HRYMX, fred_v, Yair Aronshtam, Alt-x, random exposure, zeevveez, Ron Cogswell, FindYourSearch, Israel_photo_gallery, Serendipity Diamonds, zeevveez, Steve Corey, Dominic's pics, leighklotz, Stefans02, dannyman, RonAlmog, Stephen O, RonAlmog, Tips For Travellers, Futurilla, anomalous4, Bob Linsdell, AndyMcLemore, symphony of love, Cory M. Grenier, miketnorton, andydr, BLM Nevada, upsidedown astronomer, sara~, Gamma Man, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, robef, b1mbo, European Southern Observatory, Brett Jordan, Johnny Silvercloud, Israel_photo_gallery, smkybear, --Sam--, S Baker, Paulann_Egelhoff, liquid7, Selena Sheridan, D'oh Boy, campbelj45ca, symphony of love, 19melissa68, entirelysubjective, Leimenide, dheera.net, Brett Jordan, HonestReporting.com, Iqbal Osman1, One Way Stock, Jake Waage, picto:graphic, Marcelo Alves, KAZVorpal, Sparkle Motion, Brett Jordan, Ambernectar 13, Howdy, I'm H. Michael Karshis, Steven DuBois, Cristian V., tortuga767, Jake Cvnningham, D'oh Boy, Eric Kilby, quinn.anya, Lenny K Photography, One Way Stock, Bird Eye, ell brown, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, Kevin M. Gill, lunar caustic, log_mitra777, gerrybuckel, quinn.anya, Kaz Andrew, kodomut, kayugee, jintae kim's photography, Futurilla, terri_bateman, Patty Mooney, Yandle, Amydeanne, Paulann_Egelhoff, Mulling it Over, Ungry Young Man, Ruth and Dave, yangouyang374, Broo_am (Andy B), symphony of love, kennethkonica, young@art, CoffeePartyUSA, Brett Jordan, slgckgc, Celestine Chua, rkimpeljr, Kristoffer Trolle, TooFarNorth, D'oh Boy, Grace to You, LittleStuff.me, Dikshant Shahi, Kevin M. Gill, philozopher, traveltipy.com, Alan Cleaver, crazyoctopus, kevin dooley, d_vdm, tonynetone, Grempz, penjelly, TheToch, JohnE777, hello-julie, DaveBleasdale, Muslimology, Michael Candelori Photography, andessurvivor, slgckgc, byzantiumbooks, sasha diamanti