In Living an Inner Life in Today's Generation, Rav Itamar Schwartz mentions the idea from the Vilna Gaon and others that in later generations, the Generation of the Mabul/Flood, Dor HaPlagah/Generation of Dispersal (i.e., the Tower of Babel fiasco), and Sodom will ALL return in later generations (we are of those later generations).

It sounds truly awful because as Rav Schwartz notes, these three were "only" one-third of previous generations.

But in later generations (like now), they're ALL coming back — together. Simultaneously.

And as we know, three-thirds equals 1 whole.

In other words, our present generation is completely infiltrated by the Floodies, "Babblers," and Sodomites (in addition to the Erev Rav).

​And that explains so much of what's going on today.

Let's look at some of the parallels.

For example, Dor HaMabul (Generation of the Flood) was not Jewish or non-Jewish; there was no Torah or Judaism or Jew in that time. You had Noach and the ancestor of Am Yisrael, Noach's son Shem.

Dor HaMabul was all about corruption in every sense of the word.

​Theft ruled the day, although the Pele Yoetz notes that it was also steeped in the same sin that Er & Onan stumbled, along with other sins against chaste behavior, including extramarital sins.

I heard that abortion was also practiced.

They committed idolatry, which basically means that they indulged in occult practices.

The occult has made a massive comeback in today's world. Wicca is considered a cool feminist system, plus the whole goddess aspect has been a prized part of being "progressive."

Eastern religions with all their idols have become popular.

There are many indications of occult even within seemingly secular aspects of society.

I also read somewhere animal cross-breeding went on during Dor HaMabul, which was included in the overall corruption of that time. Hybrids are often sterile and rather than being the best of both kinds, hybrids often display the genetic faults of both.

Finally, according to the Kli Yakar, Dor HaMabul was plagued with moral relativity. Even the tzaddikim reassured non-tzaddikim that "we're all same." (Kamoni, komocha.) "I'm okay, you're okay."

A sinner stood among tzaddikim and said, "I'm a tzaddik like you."

It was the "feel good" generation.

​Sort of like now.

(For more on this generation, please see The Kli Yakar on Parshas Noach: Why Did Hashem Destroy the World with Water? And What is the Connection to Hurricanes? & The Hidden Sin of the Flood Generation: What We Can Learn From It Today — AKA The Kli Yakar on Parshat Noach.)

By the way, there is a LOT more to say about that generation. The commentaries, Talmud, and midrashim are full of insights.

Sodom was wholly non-Jewish and known for its warped value system, which extended into its justice system.

It was an externally beautiful & advanced society that condoned terrible cruelty under a system of terribly distorted morals.

Toeva was also fine with them.

Also, I do not know if this was part of Sodom, but the hymn of a Sumerian priestess from Avraham Avinu's hometown of Ur survived until today. (If the dating is correct — and accurate dating is much harder to pinpoint than scientists like to admit — the hymn predates Avraham Avinu.)

The self-lauding priestess is under the delusion that she is the wife of a moon "god" and she boasts of her ability to have "changed men into women!"

Meaning, she successfully accomplished this.

And she is mighty proud of it. She views it as a good thing.

Experts in that time like to debate exactly what she meant, but with all the meshugas of today, it's becoming clearer that she likely meant what a lot of people mean today:

​Even if one is clearly of a particular gender, one has the right to define themselves & be treated as the opposite gender — with the truly bizarre results promoted today, including completely irrational consequences within the medical field.

(Like when a woman who insists she is a man comes in complaining of abdominal pain, some say the doctor must pretend she doesn't have a uterus or ovaries and instead focus on something else, like her appendix. And vice-versa. I don't know if this has happened yet, but this is what they're promoting.)

Is this connected specifically to Sodom? Or to the surrounding occult systems?

I'm not sure.

But such a similar re-awakening cannot be incidental in an era in which 3 ancient corrupt generations return.

Also, speaking of Sodom justice...

When we were 16, a friend of mine went to court in order to be transferred into the custody of her divorced father, who'd been banished from her life due to false accusations.

She'd recently found him & discovered what she'd sensed all along: He wasn't the pervy monster her abusive mother always insisted he was.

After enduring years of physical abuse by her mother and 2 years of pervy abuse by her stepfather (who was an elder in their Mormon church & told her at age 14 he would no longer abuse her because she was now "too old for him"), my friend decided to utilize the law that allows 16-year-old children to decide with which parent they want to live. 

​The judge deciding the case fulfilled the great feminist ideal: She was female.

According to feminists, all the inequalities in society are due to there not being enough females in charge.

Men are misogynists and incapable of providing fair & equal treatment...or so goes the feminist claim.

​Anyway, the oh-so exalted female judge ruled it's best for children to be with their mother, especially in a nuclear family situation (as opposed to living with a single father) and so my friend needed to stay in her profoundly toxic environment.

Ooh, it's best for the child! It's in the child's best interests to remain in a family with a stable marriage and a mother and a (step) father!

It doesn't matter they're abusive creeps! Family first! It's best for the child!

And so much for the supposedly wiser & more compassionate authority of a female...

(And no, the judge didn't have a bias, like being a Mormon herself. She was apparently able to be stupid & immoral all on her own.)

I admit that knocked a pretty deep chink in my own ideal as a self-proclaimed feminist at that time, plus crushed my perception of the American justice system as "fair." (Although certainly, it is much fairer than almost any other justice system in the world and in human history.)

It also proved to me the meaninglessness of promoting females to such positions. 

From that time on, I maintained the position of focusing ONLY on a person's actual qualifications. I refused to care how many women populated such a position. Only decent, sensible people need apply.

Anyway, it was a ruling truly worthy of Sodom.

(In case you're wondering what happened in the end: Our high school guidance counselor discovered an underground foster care system that operated beneath the law. So one day at school, my friend hugged me good-bye and then literally raced off to be smuggled out of state to an unofficial foster home. She kept on the move, shifting between 3 states until she could re-emerge on her 18th birthday & finally go live with her father.)

I was left seething: THE WORLD CANNOT WORK THIS WAY! THIS IS ALL WRONG!

​I felt like my friend, the victim, shouldn't be the one who needs to go into hiding.

​And that's Sodom: Welcome to Sodom — where we punish the victim!

In addition to the return of the above 3 generation, we also have the re-emergence of Erev Rav and according to Chazal, they take the position of authority within Am Yisrael.

And all this explains why things are increasingly & intensively crazier than ever.

People don't seem to know what is right or wrong, and there is tremendous pressure to empathize with people who do bad things or who are extremely misguided & trying to drag society down with them.

As far as I can tell, Europe has lost its conservative religious faction. Yes, there may be conservative religious people in Europe, but they've lost their voice. 

Let's face it: When your big hero of conservatism is a toeva atheist, the game is over. (I'm looking at you, England.)

When the leader of one of your most conservative parties must apologize on behalf of a representative who merely states that he opposes toeva "marriage," the game is over. (England again.)

Yet in American where the religious conservatives still wield influence, those conservatives are still a far cry from the norm that existed (among both the conservative AND liberal) only 2 generations ago.

American conservatives — even the religious ones — have basically given up promoting abstinence before marriage. Instead, they focus on avoiding abortion via contraception or adoption.

Many conservative women pundits dress in an undignified immodest manner, and nearly all of the American religious conservative pundits, whether men or women, use foul language. 

They formulate excuses for why they allow themselves to watch movies that trash their self-proclaimed values, read books that trash their self-proclaimed values, and watch TV that trashes their self-proclaimed values. (So they end up immersed in all the things they claim to fight.)

It's increasingly confusing, especially when you see frum people (including VERY frum-looking people) involve themselves in aspects of the non-Jewish world that aren't so appropriate for them (or for any frum Jew, actually).

And they receive enormous accolades for this, including the impression that they are creating a big kiddush Hashem.

It's very, very confusing.

​So what's a person to do?

Basically, we need to realize what's going on:

Sodom is back.

Dor HaFlagah is back.

Dor HaMabul is back.

The Erev Rav are back & mighty powerful.

In the non-Jewish world, it's easy enough to figure that almost anything promoted probably reflects an agenda of those 3 ancient generations, whether it's a value system promoted in mainstream science or media, novels, social science bestsellers, political movements, movies, TV, and so on.

In the Jewish world, it's easy enough to see when a secular Jew fighting Torah is Erev Rav, but much harder when the Jew looks frum and seems to be on the side of Torah.

For example, in Surviving Spiritually Today, Rav Itamar Schwartz relates the story of the daughter of an avreich who attends a charedi seminary where she learns that she must get a job to support her husband in Torah. 

Rav Schwartz notes that the seminary taught a lot of good Torah & hashkafah from well-known speakers, but one of the "charedi" teachers also encouraged this girl to find a job working in the Israeli government because those jobs are the steadiest and bring the best pension — all for the sake of supporting the husband in Torah, of course.

Rav Itamar Schwartz responds:    

Rav Schwartz is generally against receiving any financial support from the Israeli government because of their Erev Rav souls, all the more so, sending a precious bat Yisrael to go work for them.

Rav Schwartz strongly opposes working in "impure" places because it affects one's Torah. 

As he mentions regarding the famous Chazal, "If there is no flour, there's no Torah," if the flour is wormy, then the Torah learned will also be wormy.

So it's genuinely confusing. 

As Rav Schwartz notes:

The post was sparked by 2 posts I came across on the same day, which I saw as a message from Hashem:

• ​Living an Inner Life in Today's Generation
• Rav Avigdor Miller on How To Become A Baal Teshuva

They both contained the same message: Disconnect.

That is so, so hard to do nowadays.

Even if you've physically isolated yourself into a frum neighborhood, you still have your gadgets.

In many places throughout the world, you can no longer carry out certain necessary functions without Internet access.

​So in some areas, even very sincerely frum people have some sort of Internet gadget (with the best filter available, of course).

And even if you've got a strong filter and read only "frum" sites, a lot of mixed hashkafah still gets through.

Also, a lot of frum people work in spiritually difficult environments. The environment might be non-Jewish, secular Jewish, or frum with secular hashkafot.

And something else that isn't spoken of much is family members who aren't on the level.

The most obvious is a secular family who does teshuvah later, but one of the spouses or kids never makes the switch, yet lives in the frum home.

However, there are frum people who got married in the frum way, but are stuck with a spouse who lacks integrity or looks for loopholes and finds the outside world alluring.

Also, a lot of teens who teeter still live at home and they bring in their cell phone, their clothing styles, their secular music, and new attitudes into the home.

(Sure, the parents can tell them not to...and watch how that doesn't work either.)

In some cases, they even bring secular-style dating into the picture (but it's usually temporary & secretive, so the family doesn't know about it).

Parents often try to find another living situation for them, but it often either doesn't work out, the child refuses to go, or the child still comes back for vacations and the like.

Pop psychology, which infiltrated the frum community, places the blame squarely on the parents.

I used to buy into that too. (And it IS sometimes true.)

But over the years, I couldn't help noticing families in which the mother strove with everything she had (even if it wasn't much) to be a good parent while her husband was dysfunctional in some way.

Despite the motto "A child needs only one good parent!", I soon realized that often wasn't true.

Children need fathers. They need GOOD fathers. They just do. That's how Hashem set things up.

So the mother, who was actually killing herself to parent healthily in an unhealthy situation, still suffered at least one child going off the derech (at least temporarily) while also being shoved into the same "problematic parent" box as her truly problematic husband.

​Not fair.

Furthermore, even two very good parents often cannot overcome an overall poor school experience.

​That's just one example.

And I even know couples who get along very well and attended chinuch classes (which they took very seriously), strove to find the school to best fit their kids, kept an Internet-free home, and still ended up with problems with a couple of their kids.

So a lot of stuff gets into the home regardless of what you do. 

So with being attacked from within & without, plus our own yetzer hara, what's a Jew to do?

So...you disconnect as much as you can from Dor HaMabul, Dor HaFlagah, Sodom, and Erev Rav.

And you do so not just by sur me'ra (turning from evil), but also aseh tov (doing good).

You make up a schedule to learn some authentic Torah everyday, whether that's Rashi on Mishlei or Pele Yoetz or Mesillat Yesharim — and even if it's only 5 minutes or 1 paragraph a day.

Spending time reading or listening to Rav Avigdor Miller's shiurim can also have a profound effect.

Rav Shimshon Dovid Pincus's books also provide tremendous influence in an enjoyable way.

​If you have more time, you can even make a whole project out of it — yes, even if you're limited to English only.

For example, let's say you wish to really imbibe the Pele Yoetz. So you go to the first chapter (Love of God) and read it in English HERE. 

Then you go to the page where all the chapters are arranged (HERE), and you click on the arrow on the left side of the shiur by Rabbi Eli Mansour to listen on the spot or you click on the right download it.

Then you mosey on over to Torahanytime.com, where you find Rabbi Noach Oelbaum's shiur on that same chapter (HERE) and you listen to that.

With all that, you are well on your way to being positively & profoundly influenced by the authentic Torah of the Pele Yoetz.

Personally, I'm very into filling up our minds & hearts with good and pushing out the not-good that way. It's much more natural and more effective.

​Things work best when you simply DON'T WANT the bad stuff.

(I wrote about my personal experience with that here: What is the Most Painless Path to True Teshuvah?)

Needless to say, I'm still working on this all myself.

Many posts result from my own struggles in these areas.

And finally yet most importantly: real tefillah from your heart in your own words.

Even a few minutes a day can reap rewards.

Another way to chart the downward spiral of Western society is to look at the blatant hypocrisy taking hold.

And I don't just mean how rioting about the accidental death of a womanizing, thieving, formerly violent drug-addicted irresponsible father at the hands of a police officer who was clearly power-tripping his sadistic streak...when some American cities have recently had their largest number of shootings EVER in a 24-hour period and nearly all the victims are black and you don't hear a word about it from BLM.

(In fact, because police are now reluctant to patrol dangerous neighborhoods properly, these same neighborhoods are seeing higher-than-ever numbers of shootings & murders, including the shooting-murder of a 7-year-old black girl...who might've been protected if a police officer of any color had been in the vicinity.)

Nor do I mean the whole narrative of hating whites and demanding reparations over Southern slavery from 2 centuries ago, when black Africans fully cooperated with white slave traders to capture other black Africans, and the first official slave-holder in America was NOT A WHITE MAN, but a black man named Anthony Johnson in 1655 (and even then slave laws were only passed in 1661, so Johnson was quite the early adopter), and that there were also black slave-owners in the American South and that, on average, they were considered much harsher & stingier (by the black slaves themselves) toward their slaves than the white slave-owners were.

​(And also that black slavery with black masters is still part of Africa today, while the overwhelming majority of white Americans think slavery is atrocious and never want it to return.)

And hardly any of the people who say they care about human rights & slavery care or even know about the above.

But I don't mean those examples of hypocrisy.

Another blatant hypocrisy exists.

And that's the hypocrisy regarding evil and not. 
​
One example of this hypocrisy is that of the decades-long best-selling fantasy author from the 70s-80s (let's call her Heinous Monster) whose daughter worked up the courage to reveal the truth about her astoundingly successful mother and her father.

Though I never read Heinous Monster's books, I remember this author well because I always saw her name featured more prominently than her titles on her novels in the promotional displays in every book store, in addition to seeing her books in many homes.

One of her fantasy series has remained a best-seller since the Seventies and she created a popular fantasy magazine that gave many successful fantasy writers their start.

Yet this same author was attracted to her own gender, yet oddly chose to marry a man attracted to his own gender. (And in their circles, this guarantees infidelity.)

Furthermore, the author's husband already had a court conviction of abusing boys.

Also, this author copyedited her husband's book, which glorified the abuse of boys by men.

These are the objective facts outside the daughter's accusations.

Their daughter also recalls terrible abuse at the hands of her mother, plus being trafficked for abuse by her mother's "friends"!

With her mother's full knowledge, her father founded an infamous organization dedicated to the abuse of boys, and also abused a series of boys until the daughter called the police and ultimately put her father in prison, where he later died.

(Her mother also abused children, but I'm not sure whether she was convicted of it.)

Her brother corroborates her stories of abuse and their parents' depravity.

Court evidence shows that the mother knew of her husband's abuse of children (how could she not when she helped copyedit his book about it?), but did nothing about it. (She wouldn't because she was the same. Actually, her daughter says she was even worse.)

Reviews of her stories include remarks of disgust at the glorified exploitation of children featured within these best-selling novels. Many comment along the lines of: What kind of person would write something like that?

The glorification of depravity was blatant enough that some fans stopped reading her books because they found the author's positive attitude toward the content so disturbing.

The radical feminism & toeva were also blatant enough that some readers described those aspects of the series as "preachy."

On a personal level, both fans & newbie writers sometimes ended up verbally attacked by Heinous Monster when they approached her at conventions (when it is appropriate to approach a writer because that's why they're there).

In short, there is a lot of corroboration to back up the daughter's revelations.

Yet who has heard of this scandal?

Was there any widespread movement to boycott the books or condemn the author?

There was a very brief blitz in the media (particularly among sci-fi/fantasy writers) that passed by mostly unnoticed by the public (as far as I could tell).

Some readers vowed never to read her books again. A couple of fellow sci-fi & fantasy authors also resolved never to read the books again or support anything to do with the author.

But much of the condemnation came with tiptoe-through-the-tulips terms like calling the revelations "tragic" or emphasizing the need to "separate the art from the artist" or philosophizing that "talented doesn't mean good" (as if we didn't know that already) along with expressing gratitude toward the author's professional deeds while expressing tepid disapproval of the author, referring to her as a "flawed creator."

I would say she's heinous, monstrous, and utterly corrupt — not merely "flawed." 

Heinous Monster's former literary super-agent responded by saying they're "aware of allegations," yet lacked "personal knowledge" of the allegations, saying that the author was "an enormously kind person."

This was clearly not true because in addition to her depraved writing, it is easy to find reports of very bad behavior. She lashed out at both fans & novice writers.

Also, like I said, some of her books were so sick that readers questioned what kind of person who could write and promote such sick things. And that was before the allegations came out.

The literary agency (one of the stars in that field) knew her work.

They knew she wrote & promoted really sick things — exactly the things her daughter accused her of doing.

There was obviously a real disconnect going on.

​One author/editor who'd worked with the depraved fantasy writer even warned the public not to believe "sensationalist rumors." (Bet she wasn't nearly as circumspect regarding #metoo.)

Oh, but she took it back later, claiming her words were "ill-considered."

("Ill-considered," eh? How about "really cruel and flippant"? I guess that's because she can't admit that her value system is what's really "ill-considered.")

To be fair, this same author-editor later offered a big apology & even assisted the police on behalf of the daughter, but made a weird statement saying that her mistake was that she thought that the depraved author's husband "had not acted on his proclivities."

Seriously?

Does she mean to say that she knew he was depraved about young boys, but was okay with it as long as he didn't act on it?

​And these are the people deciding what society reads.​

​Yet let's look at a different best-selling fantasy author (NOT Heinous Monster): JK Rowling.

JK Rowling is liberal-bordering-on-Leftist & globally adored. She is no monster, but she supports & sympathizes with agendas & values Judaism calls immoral.

Yet when the extremely liberal-bordering-on-Leftist & beloved J.K. Rowling made a little tweet saying something completely sensible & obvious about gender (while expressing sympathy for people who think they are the gender they aren't)...society exploded.

She came under attack from social media harassment, baseless accusations, cancellation, nasty slurs, threats of violence against her, and calls for her books to be burned. 

​All because of a very innocent & sensible little tweet.

Staff at her publishing company refused to work on JK Rowling's new book in protest and several authors even left their literary agency because it also represents J.K. Rowling.

This particularly revolts me because, in contrast, no one refused to work on the Heinous Monster's books which promoted her really horrific agenda.

And while I know one author did leave Heinous Monster's agency without saying why (possibly because of that), no one else did even though the agency peddled the actual books that promoted this agenda (as opposed to J.K. Rowling's tweet, which has nothing to do with her literary agency). 

So authors had a very good reason to leave the Heinous Monster's agency, seeing as the agency showed an appalling lack of morals, but authors didn't leave (except for possibly one).

In contrast, authors had absolutely no reason to leave J.K. Rowling's agency (literary agents don't manage or even necessarily see their authors' tweets), yet they stormed off anyway.

(I admit that this type of "progressive" response to the issue makes me want to crawl into a shell and never come out. Then I remember where I live & that I am actually already IN a shell! Phew!)

​What's bizarre is that J.K. Rowling has expressed empathy for gender-dysphoric people, has befriended them, and even supports gender-reassignment surgery in a minority of cases!

So she's definitely on the extreme liberal side of things & very sympathetic to them.

Yet they turned on her with vicious passion.

Because JK Rowling doesn't deny basic obvious biological FACT, she has been shlepped across the coals & been accused of hating such people, along with a lot of other blah-blah-blah.

So you see very clearly the values of society and what's important to people.

Thus, we have a society in which a person (Heinous Monster) who indulges in & supports the severe abuse & exploitation of children, who is accused of nearly murdering her own daughter and trafficking her out to friends — such a person is "flawed" and "tragic."

We are advised to "separate the art from the artist!"

But a person (JK Rowling) who says that physical biological gender exists is labeled as "phobic" and "hating" to the point that staff refuses to work on her book, she's boycotted and cancelled, and slammed across the globe?

This clearly demonstrates people's very sick priorities & revolting hypocrisy.

Please note that the above comparison is like-and-like.

Meaning, J.K. Rowling & the Heinous Monster are both Left-leaning liberal, female, feminist, wildly popular, best-selling fantasy writers.

​And look at the difference in response to their "misdeeds." (In J.K. Rowling's case, it wasn't even a misdeed, but merely a perceived misdeed...because she was actually correct.)

And before you point out that J.K. Rowling made a tweet of her own views, while Heinous Monster's daughter making allegations against the other author, please remember that the awful author made her sick views very clear in her books.

I've never read any of Heinous Monster's books, but in one series in particular, readers expressed discomfort with the display of such depravity. Again, it was promoted to the point that some readers even called it "preachy."

Again, Heinous Monster knew her husband had been convicted of abusing boys BEFORE they married, she knew he founded an organization dedicated to that, and she copyedited his book glorifying such abuse, plus she promoted this kind of abuse, plus toeva & radical feminism in her books.

(Despite J.K. Rowlings faults, I can't imagine she would ever do or even tolerate the same.)

So yeah, Heinous Monster didn't make a tweet of her beliefs, but her actions & writing clearly pushed a depraved & harmful agenda.

This again follows the theme of who your martyr is says a lot about you.

But in this case, it's the same theme turned on its head.

Here, it's about who is your villain & what that says about you.

Related posts:

• What Your Chosen "Martyrs" Say about You (in addition to the fact that in a pandemic, gathering in prayer is apparently dangerous & irresponsible, but gathering in violent riots is totally fine)

​​

• How would You Like to Take Your Poison: Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up?​

By the way, if anyone is struggling with the wording in the morning brachot for men & women ("Blessed are You...for having made me according to His Will" vs. "Blessed are You...for not having made me a woman"), Rabbi Zecharia Wallerstein and Rabbi Epstein offer a solid discussion of this in the video below, and branch out into related areas of this topic.

It's the first question they answer after the introduction at 1 minute & 43 seconds into the video, then goes on for around 19 minutes.

Here is the link:
Special Event: Five Towns Question and Answer

(Note: I haven't finished listening to the whole shiur yet, so I don't know what the rest of it is about.)

The Sassover Rebbetzin’s 2015 memoir, Forever in Faith: The Sassover Rebbetzin Reflects, was one of the harder Shoah memoirs for me to get through.
 
They’re always difficult to read, but this one was even more so.
 
The Sassover Rebbetzin Bluma Teitelbaum a"h was just 17 when the Nazis invaded. And she ended up losing her entire God-fearing illustrious family in the Shoah.

Enduring harrowing experience after harrowing experience, the horrors didn’t cease with the end of the war.
 
While many survivors recall difficult conditions after the war, whether rehabilitating themselves in Displaced Person camps or trying to track down surviving relatives and making a quick (and often risky) trip back to their original home, Forever in Faith records a particularly frightening period upon liberation in which Bluma was still on the run for her life — and still starving.
 
Young Bluma and the smattering of other girls who survived the Death March found themselves in a German village still smoldering with Jew-hatred.

The “liberators” were Russian Mongols whose behavior was so bestial that a German village woman who’d initially expressed vicious Jew-hatred toward Bluma ended up taking Bluma and another girl into her home — for her own protection more than theirs, but it still gives you a picture of how bad the Russian soldiers were.

​(Rebbetzin Teitelbaum, being a very refined person, did not go into much detail.)

When Bluma finally made it back to her people (albeit still in Europe), she noted that many Jews left the fold due to the horrors they’d endured.

​Yet she also noted several remarkable girls from assimilated families who, upon fathoming the miracles that had saved them, decided to explore what Judaism was all about and strengthened their mitzvot observance. (They received support from other young female frum survivors, intent on rebuilding Am Yisrael.)
 
At this point, Bluma made a shocking resolve that shows the depth of her personal greatness: Upon realizing she was the only survivor of her family, she decided that she owed Hashem something in return for His Great Grace in enabling her to survive impossible conditions.
 
This boggles the mind because she could have so easily (and understandably) decided to resent Hashem for killing off her entire family, which consisted of such wonderful & dedicated Jews.
 
But no. The now twentysomething Bluma decided to face her devastating situation with gratitude (!).
​
After pondering how she could best serve Hashem, she decided she would marry a genuine talmid chacham and dedicate her life to Torah.

So, while most other survivors were getting married and starting new lives, Bluma held out for her dream.

After several years, she met a tzaddik who’d also survived the Shoah — and who was 20 years her senior — and they married.
 
Happily, she dedicated herself to her tzaddik husband and his Torah. But not long after they married, he took ill and then passed away, leaving no children.
 
Still committed to her initial decision, Bluma held out again for marriage to another genuine talmid chacham. She ended up married to the Sassover Rebbe Lipa Teitelbaum, and they had several children in quick succession.
 
Tragically, the Rebbe also died early, leaving the Sassover Rebbetzin to raise their children and manage his institutions on her own.

​Due to her own spiritual greatness, Rebbetzin Bluma Teitelbaum was accorded honors by Gadolei Hador generally reserved for other Gedolei Hador and genuine talmidei chachamim.

The Gerrer Rebbe of that time (the Beis Yisroel) used to give her priority whenever he heard she was in his waiting room.

​The Chazon Ish, who met with people as little as possible and kept visits short with those he did meet, used to accord her honor by going out to receive Rebbetzin Bluma whenever she needed him and spent as much time with her as she needed.
 
Time and again, the greatest Gadolim of Am Yisrael accorded Rebbetzin Bluma honor and deference they reserved only for other Gadolei Hador.
 
Why?

​When asked, these Gadolei Hador expressed reverence for Rebbetzin Bluma’s solid emuna and the fact that she wholeheartedly dedicated herself to tzarchei hatzibbur—the needs of the community.
 
And I think this gets lost in today’s world of self-promotion, impressive degrees, and nifty titles.
 
Rebbetzin Bluma was not accorded honor due to her illustrious husband (although that would’ve been appropriate too) nor because of her great intelligence and scholarship (although she also possessed a brilliant mind that enabled her to assist her sons with learning Gemara).
 
It had to do with Rebbetzin Bluma’s middot and other mind-boggling inner qualities, like her emuna and dedication to Torah & the Jewish community — especially in the face of the extreme horror she suffered, in addition to the heartbreak of being widowed twice and other challenges.

​Likewise, Rebbetzin Batsheva Kanievsky a"h merited the power to give brachas on the basis of her commitment to dedicate herself to tzarchei hatzibbur.
 
In fact, when her husband Rav Chaim Kanievsky went to Rav Elyashiv for a bracha in success with a particular issue, Rav Elyashiv asked Rav Kanievsky why he didn’t go to Rav Elyashiv’s daughter (Rav Kanievsky’s wife) Batsheva for a bracha? She has the power, Rav Elyashiv affirmed.
 
Though Rebbetzin Batsheva Kanievsky was Rav Elyashiv’s daughter, Rav Elyashiv wouldn’t have said it if it wasn’t true. He was a very loving father, but not a blindly sentimental one.

If he said it, it was true.
 
This is despite the fact that Rebbetzin Batsheva was highly intelligent. Her former classmates and teachers repeatedly attested to Rebbetzin Batsheva’s brilliant mind. And of course, she was a learned woman.
 
Yet Rebbetzin Batsheva Kanievsky’s power to give brachas and to positively influence people didn’t come from her scholarship.

It came from her internal qualities, her personal holiness and dedication to the Jewish people.

Unfortunately for both men & women today, titles and degrees and IQ levels predominate.
 
And unfortunately, some quasi-Orthodox women wish to take on the negative aspects of men (“I need an impressive title! I need an impressive certificate! I need kavod!”), which has been typical of the feminist movement.
 
Meaning not that all men pursue kavod, but men and women each have certain positive tendencies and negative tendencies.

​For millennia, Chazal has propounded against the male tendencies to covet kavod & titles & position. (You can see this in every mussar sefer and the Gemara, where the Sages are clearly addressing a male audience, although women are certainly invited to and can benefit from these mussar sefarim too.)

​Yet rather than trying to refine men, society has encouraged women to take men’s negative tendencies upon themselves. (So now women can be weighed down with double the negatives—ooh, I feel so liberated!)
 
And the most high-falutin’ “rabbah” will never merit the honor and deference the Sassover Rebbetzin Bluma Teitelbaum merited from the greatest Gadolei Hador.
 
(And neither will the high-falutin’ male rabbis who lack the personal inner qualities needed to merit the kavod of tzaddikim.)
 
Real spiritual giants do not covet titles or honors or impressive degrees.
 
That’s the point: They don’t seek honor at all; not from great people and not from small people.
 
They just do what they need to do and keep their eye on the ball: Hashem’s Ratzon.
 
The honor, the accolades, and the powers they receive are the natural result of their inner development.
 
Those things aren’t the goal and never should be.

​An issue that keeps popping up in Israeli society is giyus banot—female army enlistment.
 
This topic deserves a much bigger post, but we’ll just start out with this.
 
Ever since it became an issue decades ago, every big talmid chacham I’ve heard give his opinion on this has stated that it’s forbidden across the board, no exceptions. Ever.
 
This post isn’t even going to go into the whole reason why the Gedolim so strongly oppose giyus banot, but will briefly describe the historical key to Jewish military success and then address one angle of the whole shebang because it's an angle craftily used by the propaganda machine.

​As described in the posts regarding my son’s army service (plus my own experiences talking to former female IDF “soldiers” & the plain cold hard numbers), the IDF is anyway overstaffed with many soldiers (hundreds at least) serving in imaginary positions—like the girl on my son’s base who was in charge of “culture & recreation,” but did nothing for 6 months except watch pirated movies on her cell phone all day and show the base an American movie one evening.  

​And that’s just one example.
 
And despite propaganda to the contrary, women CANNOT carry out combat duties nearly as well as men.
 
So practical reasons for female enlistment are almost nil.
 
Interestingly, the Gedolim haven’t made exceptions for females who could perform certain military tasks better than males. That’s not the issue.
 
A Jewish army has always depended on the spiritual quality of its soldiers and the spiritual quality of its motivation for its success.
 
WHO is going out to war and WHY?
 
You can read this in Tanach.
 
Yes, Jewish warriors have always displayed superior battle skills, whether in actual battle or in strategy.
 
But historically, the key to their success (or lack of) in battle rested in their hearts.
 
Again, you can see this pattern throughout Jewish history.

But certain powers-that-be are ignoring the historical facts and making giyus banot a pivotal issue.
 
So let’s take a look at one aspect of modern military service that gets pumped in the media because females do tend to perform better than males in this area.

​Because it’s a passive, nitpicky job, women tend to be better at camera surveillance than men.
 
Does this mean that men cannot do it at all?
 
NO.
 
It just means that you’ll find more women suited to this work than men.
 
Does this mean that you need to draft women into the IDF for this work?
 
NO.
 
In a Nachal Charedi unit in the South (I think it’s Givati), they use males to perform this task because they can’t have females on this base due to the Nachal Charedi restrictions. And these males seem to be performing just fine.
 
Furthermore, my son said that when he worked on a base that specialized in surveillance, there were always a couple of guys among the girls. This wasn’t to meet some quota (“We need at least 2 males per X-number females each shift!”); this was because these guys happened to be equally good at surveillance.
 
So they are out there, but yeah, you might need to sift more through the male population to find them.
 
Furthermore, in both recent and wayback history, wars and military efforts have been carried out just fine without any kind of female participation. Defeats & losses have been due to lack of morals or lack of brains or lack of equipment, not lack of females.
 
But due to their hidden (or actually not-so-hidden) agenda, the media & the upper echelons of the IDF like to magnify the female contribution in IDF surveillance.

Watch for this in headlines, the slant of certain articles, and the promotional photos accompanying such articles. You'll see it.

​One much-lauded example occurred a few years ago when a female screen-watcher spotted a group of terrorists scuttling out of a hole in the ground onto completely bare and empty terrain at Kibbutz Sufa.
 
(For a post detailing the miracle without promoting female military service, please see HERE.)

The screen-watcher than alerted the (male) security forces to deal with the issue of the terrorists and the newly revealed underground tunnel.
 
Now, I think many of us saw the actual footage of the event.
 
Does it take any superior skill or courage to spot a GROUP of dark figures scuttling over a bare, empty, pale patch of terrain?
 
NO.
 
Does it take any superior skill or courage to alert your superiors to this activity?
 
NO.
 
Is a male incapable of carrying out this exact same task?
 
NO.
 
In that scenario, the real heroes were shmurah matzah, Shemitah, and their adherents.

​The mass harvesting of grain to produce shmurah matzot for 2 years (including a Shemitah year) was why there was all that pale, empty, bare terrain (instead of the expected cover of tall wheat) that made it so easy to spot a group of darkly clad terrorists.
 
But the IDF high mucky-mucks inserted a whole thing about how a girl spotted the activity and how girls are better at this work ("boys don't have the same powers of concentration") than guys.

Yes, females tend to be better at boring, passive, visual activity ("powers of concentration") than males.
 
So what?
 
Why is THAT such a massive sign of progress for women and their society?

The ability to engage in boring, passive activity and do it well (and not necessarily be so bored by it)?

​That’s a big part of what makes women better mothers, better nursers of babies, and better nurturers of young children. 

It's what enables us to watch our children play at a park and prevent accidents or spot unsavory people who shouldn't be there.

Attention mommies & babysitters: If you are supervising your children at the park while sitting on the bench and staring at them, YOU ARE A HERO (in Hashem's Eyes, which are the only Eyes that matter).

It's what allows you to listen to certain family members or people in your neighborhood who tend to drone on, giving them that listening ear they need. It's a big chessed.

But davka using our innate nature for military surveillance, THAT'S the only time it's considered oh-so laudatory & deserving of media publication?

Though it is politically incorrect amid today’s slavish allegiance to egalitarianism, Judaism embraces tafkid.

And tafkid is a GOOD thing. It's an ELEVATING thing. It's a tool!
 
Just like even the most musically talented and trained Yisrael cannot perform the Levite service in the Beit Hamikdash, women and men are prohibited from crossing certain gender-defined boundaries.
 
A man receives no merit for wearing a long, wide skirt and 70-dinar stockings. Au contraire, he earns the aveirah of beged ishah.
 
On the other hand, a woman who wears such clothing earns tremendous blessing and both spiritual and physical protection, not just upon herself, but upon her family and the entire Am.
 
Likewise, a woman is the designated candle-lighter meant to usher in Shabbat.
 
Have you ever heard of a husband who said, “You know what, Genendel? My eye-hand coordination is superior to yours—I can light the Shabbas candles so much better than you. Furthermore, I can say the blessing with the kavanos of the Rashash! So step aside, sweetie, and allow me to perform licht-bentschen from now on!”?
 
Case in point: There have been many holy mekubalim throughout the ages, yet their wives always carried out the Shabbat candle-lighting (even though the mekubalim possessed the ability to make a bracha with mind-blowing kavanot).

Why?

Because according to God's spiritual physics, you davka NEED the FEMALE candle-lighter to perform this mitzvah (and this tikkun) properly.

Men can and should do this when there is no female to do so, but a husband or son cannot perform this mitzvah instead of his perfectly capable wife or mother.
 
Even going back to the Nevi’im—did any of them ever light Shabbat candles in place of their non-prophesying wife?

And flipping over to the other side of the coin, did female Prophetesses lay tefillin on behalf of their non-Prophet husband? (Meaning, he didn't need to lay tefillin that day because she did it for him? Why not? A Prophetess is so much more qualified than her non-Navi husband! But Hashem's spiritual physics don't allow for such cross-overs.)
 
Some things just can’t cross over. 

Well, not without unwanted consequences, anyway.

​The primary reason why physically intimate relationships between the same gender is wrong is because the Torah clearly states that it’s wrong. Hashem despises such relationships.
 
Furthermore, if you study the deeper significance of a marital relationship between husband & wife (on all levels: spiritual, emotional, physical, etc.), you understand more why a same-gender relationship is so incredibly corruptive and destructive.
 
Such people are seriously hurting themselves, in addition to their society, and cause harm in unseen spiritual realms.
 
One of the strongest weapons used against the proponents of traditional marriage is the idea that same-gender attraction is “normal.” They claim it’s innate and cannot be changed.
 
If you even suggest that one’s orientation can change, you will be subjected to disdain and vitriol.
 
And it has even became a human rights issue.

Human rights usually deal with truly horrific things, like child trafficking, slavery, long-term internment in terrible prisons for non-crimes, torture, concentration camps, genocide, and more.
 
With regard to same-gender attraction—particularly among males—it is all about taavah.

It’s just about being able to act on your taavah.

Sure, some of them will start blabbing on about “love,” but the kind of lifelong monogamous relationship (marriage) that regular men and women seek under the auspice of love does not exist in the male toeva community.

​(Statistics show that they are incapable of both a long-term relationship AND a monogamous one. For example, a fully monogamous 20-year relationship is barely found among these men—yet a fully monogamous 20+-year relationship is the norm among husbands & wives.)
 
So it’s basically as if human rights organizations battled for, say, the right to engage in copious, indiscriminate relationships with redheads—as if NOT being allowed to do that is equal to slaving to death for years in a diamond mine in Africa.
 
Despite the obvious ridiculousness, “expert” sources oppose the very idea of what’s known as “reparative therapy” or “conversion therapy.” One human rights organization defines such therapy as “a range of dangerous and discredited practices.”
 
Dangerous, eh?

This community has an abnormally high rate of violence, disease, criminal activity against children, addiction, and a shorter lifespan…yet trying to re-orient their attraction—THAT’S what’s “dangerous”?

​Seriously?

​The DSM no longer considers same-gender attraction something that needs to be (or can be) re-oriented.

Both the American Psychological Association and the American Counselors Association question the ethics of re-orienting a person’s attraction even if the client requests it.
 
Not only that, these organizations advise therapists to actively inform a client that such therapy has not been shown to work and can even be harmful.
 
It is hard to see how attempted therapy can be MORE harmful than a toeva lifestyle, but there are your “experts” for you.
 
The American Psychiatric Association, the American Psychological Association, the American Association of Social Workers, and the American Academy of Pediatrics joined together years ago to oppose reparative therapy.
 
A professor of psychology at the University of California-Davis even stated the following:
“And even if conversion therapies were shown to be successful in more than a relative handful of cases, they would remain ethically questionable.”
 
See? Even if there is a method to successfully change orientation, it is still “ethically questionable,” according to these people.
 
If you read the actual article, it’s full of gobbledygook that you have to sift through to find the actual information.
 
It’s impossible to enter into a rational discussion when the “experts” themselves are so dead-set against the possibility of re-orientation.

Part of the problem is that therapy for anything is overrated.

Most divorced couples participated in marriage therapy, yet divorced anyway.

Child psychologist John Rosemond has claimed many times that talk therapy does not help children, and can even make their behavior worse. He cites decades of observation to back up his opinion.

Also, the people you’ve known who’ve gone through therapy, what are they like?

The ones I’ve known still have problems (sometimes even serious problems) with emotional immaturity (including one who claimed that therapy helped her emotionally mature so much more), narcissism, and general bad middot. 
 
They may not be worse than everyone else, but they don't seem better either.

More significantly, they don't seem better (or much better) than they were before they entered therapy. 

Meaning, whether you compare them to others or to themselves, there is often a lack of notable improvement.

​And despite so many people digging in their heels to say that people can’t change their orientation, the fact is that people definitely do—and some do even without any therapy or treatment whatsoever.

​For example, a 27-year-old British man (who’d “come out” at the age of 14 with his attraction to men, never had a relationship with a woman, had indulged with over 150 partners, and worked in a service catering to male-male taavah) decided to abstain from any physical relationships for a year.
 
Dominic Hilton made this decision after reading accounts of how abstinence helped people increase their self-esteem and energy, lessen anxiety, and generally helped them get to know themselves better.
 
To his shock, he found himself increasingly attracted to women over the course of that year.
 
His final realization hit when, during a vacation in Spain with a male friend, his friend tried to engage Hilton in Hilton’s usual chitchat about what guys around are attractive.  
 
But “I just couldn’t join in,” said Hilton. “…I just don’t find men attractive anymore.”
 
Hilton also described how his fashion and mannerisms have changed. He no longer feels comfortable in “camp” styles and makeup, preferring instead tracksuits and less quasi-feminine expressions and behaviors.
 
Originally, appearing in the UK Mirror, you can find the above article HERE. 

Robert Oscar Lopez opened up on his blog and American Thinker (How to Survive a Character Assassination) regarding his own “conversion.”
 
Raised by a toeva parent & exclusively involved with other males since age 13, Lopez states that he “identified completely” with toeva and sank into a toeva lifestyle that also consisted of self-destructive behavior, abusive relationships, and drugs.
 
Upon intimacy with a woman for the first time at age 28, Lopez woke to the fact that his former lifestyle actually wasn’t okay. (Part of his thunderbolt insight had to do with the fact that the act could lead to fatherhood.) He married that woman, found God (kind of), and went on to lead a fulfilling life.
 
Interestingly, he says that premarital intimacy with a woman, looking at untsnius pictures of women (often part of reparative therapy), and other unwholesome behaviors is actually NOT ultimately helpful to re-orienting one’s attraction.

He regrets that he himself did so and wishes that he’d married his wife straightaway, having relations only after their marriage.
 
(So this might be one problem with conventional reparative therapy, in that it often encourages unwholesome behavior in the opposite direction, rather than healing the person’s soul.)
 
Working as an English instructor at California State University-Northridge, Lopez ended up being viciously & unrelentingly harassed for 7 years by both his prestigious degreed colleagues and his students. Why? Because he came out as a formerly toeva-oriented person who’d changed and was now happily married.
 
Even “worse,” he detailed his childhood suffering as the child of a toeva parent.

Unfortunately, the mere listening to an honest description of his childhood experiences (by those who don't want to hear it) is forbidden under a Californian discrimination law, which seeks to protect ostriches with their head in the sand from hearing things that they don’t want to hear.

The final problem with any discussion of this issue is the non-Jewish attitude toward mistakes, stumbles, fails, and falls.
 
It’s all black-and-white with no acknowledgement of Hashem’s Hand in things.
 
For example, alcoholism is often considered a “disease” that progresses even if you stop drinking. You are supposed to consider yourself an alcoholic for the rest of your life, even if you abstain completely from any alcohol.
 
If, say, you stumble and get drunk once after 10 years of sobriety, that is considered evidence that you are “still” an alcoholic.
 
The same is true with regard to drugs and food and anything else considered an addiction.

In secular society, you are defined by your addictions. You are defined by your negative traits and your taavahs.
 
Likewise, if a man formerly attracted to men ever finds himself looking at unwholesome images of men or even in a fling with another man, then he is considered to still “really” be attracted to men.

​Liberals especially love this black-and-white idea because they feel it “proves” that reparative therapy (or whatever inspired the man to re-orient his attraction) doesn’t really work and it seals in their own mind their mantra that orientation cannot be changed.
 
(Note: All the anti-Torah social science mentioned in this post is highly reminiscent of the fake science characteristic of murderously totalitarian societies. Please see related links below for more.)

As written about on this blog before, this is one of the very damaging beliefs in Western society, that you are defined by your negative qualities rather than your positive ones.

This false belief insists that your negative traits are the “real” you, when in reality, your positive traits are the real you.
 
Judaism informs us that failing challenges or stumbling into sin can actually be a yeridah for the sake of aliyah—sort of like hitting rock bottom in order to bounce back up as far away from rock bottom as possible, which propels you even higher than before.
 
Sometimes, these fails & falls occur to keep you humble.

Though underrated in society, Hashem cannot stand to be with prideful or haughty person. He can actually be closest to you in your remorse and pain over your fall. (Breslov chassidus goes into this whole concept quite a lot.)
 
Anyway, the point is that we all have traits & taavahs with which we were either born or developed from our environment, and we are supposed to work on overcoming these traits and taavahs.
 
We aren’t supposed to indulge them or give up on them.
 
And we certainly aren't supposed to be defined by them.

Related links:
Torah Declaration FAQ
Rav Zamir on the Root of Same-Gender Attraction
Gender Dysphoria & Cancer
Part 6 - America's Scary New Direction: One-Sided Mockery and Pseudoscience 
Why Life is So Hard & the 1 Thing You Can Do About It

​In Shemot 17:8 ("And Amalek came and battled with Yisrael in Refidim"), the Kli Yakar mentions the nefarious plot of Amalek:

According to our Sages, the word “karcha” has several implications:

• occurred
• happened
• became cold
• wasted seed

The Kli Yakar doesn’t detail further exactly how Amalek infiltrated male-male relations into Am Yisrael, but he does explain at length how the initial breach — the tumah of strife — created an opening for Amalek’s nefarious plan.
 
(You can learn more about Amalek exploiting our spiritual breaches in the Kli Yakar on Parshat Vayishlach.)

​In today’s Jewish world, the only Jews really striving for peace are Orthodox Jews —though not all of them.

Having been Conservative surrounded by a lot of Reform and very assimilated at times, then Modern Orthodox and Dati-Leumi, then chareidi Litvish BT to Sephardi chareidi (with a thing for Breslov) now, I can tell you that the only Jews who really strive to connect positively with all Jews — including those who are not like them and even reject them — are Orthodox Jews (though not all of them).
 
Maybe once (in a book) did I ever hear a non-Orthodox Jew describe Orthodox Jews with anywhere near the same understanding and compassion with which many Orthodox Jews describe non-Orthodox Jews. (I’m not saying that such non-Orthodox Jews do not exist. I’m saying that I did not encounter them, whether personally or even in a magazine article — except for a couple of passages in one thick book.)
 
In fact, many Orthodox Jews can be even more sympathetic & generous-minded toward their non-religious fellows than toward their religious fellows.
 
And Amalek has seized on this division, even though the connection between interpersonal strife and mishkav zachur is difficult to make.

​I guess mishkav zachur is a particularly nasty way to cut down Am Yisrael with immorality.
 
The Kli Yakar emphasizes that the strife removes natural protection from us while the immorality removes spiritual protection from us.
 
This is why we are seeing such massive push for acceptance of mishkav zachur in our times. Even some frum Jews have adopted an embracing attitude.
 
Note: I don’t criticize the fact that someone has this taavah. I oppose acceptance of mishkav zachur as a perfectly decent & legitimate lifestyle—it’s like saying that other serious Torah prohibitions, like baseless character assassination or chilul Shabbat or stealing or murder, are totally legitimate lifestyle choices that can find leniency within the Torah.
 
Please see What of a "Lashon Hara Pride" Movement? for one analogy of that.
 
It’s no coincidence that as Germany’s Jews made strife against their fellow frum Jews (including outright disdain of ostjuden — their fellow Jews in Poland, etc.) that Berlin became the mishkav zachur capital of the world prior to World War II, with some assimilated anti-Torah Jews falling under that Amalekite influence and fighting for mishkav zachur acceptance in German society & law.

(Please see It's Berlin All Over Again for more.)
 
Furthermore, the current movement in favor of transitioning gender identity touted as “unprecendented!” actually has roots in ancient Mesopotamia.

Archaeologists discovered a hymn by a Sumerian priestess (circa 2300 BCE) from Avraham Avinu’s hometown of Ur, who boasted of her occult ability to have successfully “changed men into women!”

(Please see Why, This Reminds Me of Ancient Mesopotamia! & If the Torah is So Adamant, Then That Must Mean Something: Why Polytheism Really is So Awful for more on that topic.)
 
Clearly, all this mishkav zachur and gender identity confusion has roots in ancient dark spiritual systems.
 
It’s all kochot hatumah & avodah zarah — and it’s not new at all.
 
And they are trying to push mishkav zachur acceptance into Eretz Yisrael.

This is all an AMALEKITE STRATEGY to DESTROY AM YISRAEL.

Because the promoters of toeva orientations whomp everyone over the head with the club of "compassion," those with the correct moral & ethical attitudes are made to feel uncompassionate, cruel, insensitive, and ignorant.

That's why it is so important to remember that the acceptance of toeva lifestyles is an Amalekite strategy for destruction and not a real movement for compassion or social "progress."

So what is the regular powerless person supposed to do about it?

As a frum person who has worked in kiruv and was even a rebbetzin for a blessedly short while, I realize that I cannot convince Jews committed to anti-Torah ideologies (Reform, socialism, communism, feminism, Leftism, etc.) not to make strife. (Some frum people can — sometimes. But I discovered that I personally cannot.)
 
However, as a frum person, I can:

• work on not making strife with my husband or my neighbors.
• foster harmonious sibling relationships among my children
• be careful of my attitude toward different yet Torah-true groups of Jews
• give tzedakah to precious Jews with whom I don’t share the exact same hashkafah (like Chabad or the Gush Katif kallahs)
• strive to judge favorably
• see a positive attribute in even the yuckiest Jew
• forgive those who hurt me in some way
• struggle to overcome a grudge
• I can pray positively to Hashem on behalf of all Jews. 

​I can do my part.
 
We all can.
 
It’s the only way to really fight Amalek.

​Today’s modern world insists on evening out traditionally male-dominated fields.
 
In some fields, like left-brained fields of technology and engineering, you’ll never see true equality just like you’ll never see a 50-50 ratio of male-to-female nannies or newborn nurses. (Although if you do see such tidy ratios, you’d better head out to another, saner society because enforced equality means lower quality.)
 
But women are not only saturating but excelling in other traditionally male-dominated fields.
 
Why is that?

​While Leftists pundits will yap about social conditioning and constructs, the truth is that some traditionally male-dominated fields are actually quite conducive for feminine strengths and women didn't need much in encouragement to enter those fields in droves.

​Such fields appeared male-dominated simply because women either lacked the opportunity (not necessarily because of society, but because of old-fashioned labor-intensive domestic duties) or they DID work in those fields, but not in an official capacity.
 
So what’s the difference between a traditionally male-dominated field that is actually conducive for a woman’s strengths and a traditionally male-dominated field less conducive?
 
Let’s take the example of medicine.

The official profession and title of a doctor was predominantly male for centuries.
 
Yet the actual practice of medicine was carried out by both men and women – they just didn’t call the women “doctor.”
 
For example colonial American midwife Martha Ballard was the most highly regarded midwife in her area, but she did much more than deliver babies. She treated serious diseases and also lanced abscesses. She had a working relationship with one of the top doctors in that area, and it’s clear from her diary that the relationship included mutual trust and respect for each other’s medical skills. The doctor was perfectly content for Martha to treat his own ill family members in his absence and she felt the same toward him.
 
Furthermore, when local doctors happened on the opportunity to perform an autopsy, these male doctors invited Martha to attend – just as they would any professional colleague.
 
And yes, they thought to invite her. She didn’t hint or put herself forward in any way to attend. They sought her out simply based on her obvious qualifications and skill as a medical professional.
 
So women entering the medical profession is actually a natural continuation of a role women have filled since time immemorial.
 
And studies indicate that women make better doctors than men. They seem to make fewer mistakes and so on. (Please see: JAMA Journal.)
 
Of course, we’ve all encountered bad female doctors. I had one at my last birth. She did the actual medical procedure fine, but her bedside manner was heartless and hideous. Better she should cake plaster over her mouth and just get to work doing what she was trained to do.
 
And this also is not to say that men don’t make good doctors.

There are many fine male doctors. But certain aspects of the female personality are more conducive to good doctoring. And you may call me a female chauvinist, but I personally prefer female gynecologists and obstetricians to male ones - and not just for reasons of tsnius. And I REALLY prefer female pediatricians to male ones, especially those female doctors who are mothers themselves. All things considered, women tend to be better pediatricians overall than men.
 
I don’t mean any offense to all the excellent male ob/gyns and pediatricians out there, but my personal experience shows that females are just better all-around in these particular fields.

​In other words, what these areas of medicine demand tend to be fulfilled much better by a female doctor than a male one.
 
Men tend to excel in other areas of medicine. 

No offense!

Business is another field in which women have always participated, whether on her own or, more commonly, with male family members.

​As explained in a previous post, even the classic Eishet Chayil of Mishlei/Proverbs clearly discusses a woman who invests in real estate and field production – and does so with great success.
 
So, all things considered, it’s no surprise that women make up half of medical students in America and surpass men in other fields:

• 60% of pediatricians are women 
• 51% of ob/gyns are women
• 60% of dermatology trainees are women
• 63% of those enrolled in journalism or mass communication are women

NOTE: Female enrollment in medical school occurred without affirmative action.

​Another field considered female-dominated today, but was historically the realm of males, is teaching – particularly teachers of elementary school students.

For millennia, any official teaching was performed by a male.
 
Yet by 1850, the majority of school teachers in America were female.
 
And again, like with the above professions, women were drawn toward teaching because it plays feminine strengths and is something women have done throughout history in unofficial capacity.

So in any field you find a majority of women, you’ll see it’s a field that:

• A) draws on female strengths
• B) was something that women have traditionally done anyway, albeit not necessarily in official or professional capacity

 
And so the problem with society today is that it seeks to enforce equal representation in all areas – including areas to which women aren't innately drawn and tend not to display innate aptitude.

So society attempts to enforce "equal" representation unequally because it only seeks to increase the ratio of women in male-dominated areas rather than also increase the ratio of men in female-dominated areas. (At least they aren't trying to enforce even ratios in female-dominated fields too.) It's all a disaster in the making.

​But really, people should be allowed to excel where they wish and should be allowed to just be themselves – according to whatever self Hashem gave them.

"Previous post" mentioned above:
​The True History of Women's Work

Related Post:
​What Happens When Equality Demands Discrimination

In recent times, American businesses face pressure to hire an equal number of female employees, even in areas which seriously lack qualified females.

​For example, female students simply don’t enter certain fields in the same numbers as men. (And male students simply don't enter certain fields in the same number as women.)

In the US, only 18% of computer science degrees and engineering degrees are earned by women despite the fact that women earn 64% of undergraduate college degrees.
 
And while belly-button-ponderers like to drone on about the gender gap as a purely social construct, women certainly saturate university classes for other formerly male-dominated fields.

For example, women comprise half of business students and almost half of those majoring in biology, statistics, math, and physical sciences, while over half the students in journalism and communications are comprised of women.
 
So if, for example, you need an equal gender ratio of computer scientists or engineers, you simply won’t be able to find an equal number of female computer scientists or female engineers because they just don't exist in those numbers.
 
Alternatively, as has been happening already, you’ll need to take the less qualified female computer scientists or engineers in order to attempt to close the gender gap in your company.

After all, it’s not rational to assume that every member of the 18% is a top-notch computer scientist. You’ll have some B-students in that slice, just like you have in every slice, no matter how big or small.
 
So this will actually hurt women because people will suspect that a female computer scientist or engineer is actually not so qualified and only hired because of her gender.

​And because there always are less qualified in every field, female computer scientists and engineers will gain a reputation for lower quality work because companies are forced to hire females at any price - and regardless of actual skill or qualification.
 
So female computer scientists and engineers will still have to prove that they earned their place. They’ll still have to work twice as hard to be considered just as good.

And anyway, it's just not possible to create a 50% gender ratio with only 18%.
 
That’s just one example.

And this type of gender discrimination for the sake of "equality" is what led Dilbert creator, Scott Adams, to become a cartoonist.

After repeated blocks to promotions in favor of female candidate ONLY because of gender (even though his superiors – including a female superior – admitted that he was the more qualified candidate), Adams stopped trying and instead detoured into the creation one of the most popular comic strips (and one of my personal favorites).
 
Hashem doesn’t close one door without opening another, and the second door opened into cartoon fame for Scott Adams.

However, companies forced to hire less qualified and less talented individuals will produce lower quality. 

​So the world of comics gained, but Adams's former company lost.

In contrast, how would you feel about a hospital hiring male neonatal nurses for the newborns ONLY because they were male?

How would you feel about less qualified nurses caring for your tender newborn simply to even out the gender ratio?
 
And unlike the world of engineering and computer science, most people are willing to admit that there are very real gender differences regarding the care of babies and small children.

To give an example: A non-Jewish family member of mine put his child in the preschool of the local JCC. The head teacher was a male.

When the parents came to pick up their child one day, the male teacher said playfully to the child in front of the parents, “Mason, do you want to tell your parents what you did today?”
 
After some cheery prodding, Mason said, “I ate a worm.” (Yes. An actual worm.)
 
“And what did it taste like?” said the male teacher in that cooing voice people reserve for small children.
 
“Jelly,” came the reply.

​The teacher grinned at the parents.
 
My family member and his wife found this all very funny.
 
Personally, I’m wasn't so enamored.
 
But think about it for a minute.
 
With a female caretaker, children really are less likely to eat worms or other forbidden substances. It’s not that such a thing would never happen with a female preschool teacher – it DOES happen! But women tend to me more attentive and conscientious.
 
Males tend to have a more, “Oh, it’ll probably be okay…” approach to children. Not all, but many. And sometimes they’re right in this approach, but sometimes not.
 
And just for knowing, my 3.5-year-old is in gan with 2 male melamdim and they’re fabulous. Very responsible, very warm and attentive. And the head melamed is a master educator.

And despite the fact that our school offers the option of either a female teacher or a male teacher, we chose to put our child with the melamed over the ganenet because 2 other sons learned by this melamed and had extremely positive experiences.

So our youngest is by this same melamed too.

Nonetheless, it cannot be denied that these melamdim are still a bit more laid-back than a female teacher is for that age. (But at least the children never eat worms...)
 
Secondly, in the JCC example, if that had been a female teacher, she never would’ve reported the event in such a frivolous manner.

Many male teachers wouldn't either, but male teachers -- especially younger ones -- are more likely respond with humor rather than horror to such a situation.

(Also, I found it interesting that the teacher reported it as something Mason did -- i.e., "tell your parents what you did today" -- rather than something that happened to Mason -- i.e., "tell your parents what happened to you today." Does that reflect a gender difference? I'm honestly not sure.)
 
But how could Mason’s male teacher present the whole thing as a minor and amusing episode? He didn’t feel bad or express any personal responsibility or remorse for his own lapse of diligence. How can he not even feel apologetic?

​That boggles my feminine mind.
 
Not to mention the kashrus issue if you’re Jewish...
 
In contrast, your average female teacher would say something like, “Oh, I’m so embarrassed to have to tell you this, but today, we caught Mason eating a worm before we could stop him. We’re so sorry this happened and we checked him out to make sure he was okay and we’ve taken steps to ensure this WON'T happen again. We feel just terrible about this, but we wanted to make sure you knew so that if Mason doesn’t feel well later, you can have him checked out that the worm didn’t harm him or anything.”

​She’ll probably also explain a bit about why they didn’t catch Mason in time, i.e, it’s not that they weren’t responsible or didn’t care, but unforeseen circumstances popped up, which gave Mason took the opportunity to sample the worm.

(Or she might decide not to reveal anything in order to avoid confrontation & other negative consequences.)
 
Right?

Yes, these are all generalizations. On the flip side, we all know appallingly negligent women and very conscientious men.
 
But biological hard-wiring is why more women than men tend to be attracted to working with very small children, especially babies. And these same reasons make women better than men in these areas too...generally speaking.
 
There are always exceptions.
 
Likewise, biological hard-wiring seems to be why more women tend to be less interested in computer science and engineering just like less men seem to be interested in early childhood education, becoming a neonatal nurse or becoming a nanny.
 
If you read the studies of why fewer women enter computer science and engineering and why, once there, succeed less than men, you’ll notice that it’s a lot about their approach to these areas.

The innate feminine approach is less conducive to success in these left-brained fields.

Of course, all the pontificators drone on about social conditioning, but you’re not necessarily seeing that in other traditionally male-dominated areas.
 
Needless to say, men can be excellent nannies and nurses and women can be excellent computer scientists and engineers.
 
But not nearly as many of them can be or will be.
 
So just to be clear: The issue is NOT about traditionally male-dominated professions.

Women succeed in droves in some traditionally male-dominated professions because those professions (like doctors, for example) are conducive to the female strengths and in the case of doctors, women actually practiced medicine from time immemorial, but didn't do so officially or with a fancy title.
 
It’s about biological hard-wiring, which will give one gender the upper hand in specific fields and there is NO WAY to even that out.

And forcing equality where there isn't any produces unwanted consequences.

​For the past few decades, women have been encouraged to compare themselves to men.

​This fosters unhealthy competition, including within marriage.

​Of course, this ends up infiltrating the frum world too.
 
But really, it’s like comparing apples to oranges.

​If you’re an apple, you should be interested in your appley potential and being the best apple you can be — according to whatever apple you are. There are many different kinds of apples and no 2 are the same.
 
But if you’re obsessed with how you compare to an orange, you end up holding yourself back.

​For example, you may obsess over how your peel is fully edible – yet the orange’s peel can be used for flavoring in high-end desserts. “Orange zest” somehow sounds so much more prestigious than “apple peel.” Yet you’ll be missing the wonderful vitamins and taste experience inherent in your own peel.
 
Or you fret about how to add more orange to your color. But you’re a Green Delicious! Adding more orange will only downgrade your market appeal and inherent beauty. Customers seek you out davka because you’re a Green Delicious or a Pink Lady rather than a juicy Jaffa.
 
Self-denigrating apples also ignore the absolutely scrumptious & comforting pies they make and instead yearn to be part of a citrus fruit cocktail or mourn their lack of vitamin C and pre-formed sections.
 
Likewise, Hashem set up spiritual physics so that women can achieve what men can, albeit in a different way.

​I still remember the wonder I felt when reading Rav Yehudah Petiyah’s account of an old illiterate Jewish lady who worked at sifting wheat with her millstones. Upon finding a date among the wheat, she recited a bracha with all the kavanah she had, then ate it.
 
Upon dozing off, an old man suddenly appeared before her, praising and thanking her for freeing him from his suffering — “even though you did not rescue me completely" — 
before vanishing into thin air.
 
When she consulted Rav Yehudah Petiyah, he informed her that the date contained the reincarnated soul of this old man and via her pure-hearted blessing, she succeeded in rectifying him 2 levels upward!
 
The astounding part is that she succeeded in doing so even though she recited the wrong blessing. She said borei pri ha’adamah rather than borei pri ha’etz.

​Had she recited the proper blessing, this lost soul would have achieved complete rectification.
 
Yet as far as I've seen, in order for men to accomplish such a thing, they need to fortify themselves with lots of Torah study and learn the proper kavanot of the kabbalists. You hear stories of a soul trapped in a fruit achieving some kind of rectification when eaten by a righteous Torah scholar – not a well-intentioned am ha’aretz.
 
Think about this for a minute:

​In all the stories of rectifying souls via blessings, have you ever heard of a regular yeshivah bachur achieving this? No. It’s always a learned tzaddik or even a mekubal. So how was this poor illiterate and somewhat ignorant (it’s not difficult to guess the correct blessing for a date, like it is for bananas) old lady able to achieve this?

And again, even with the wrong blessing, she managed to rectify this soul up 2 levels. Had she said the correct blessing, this soul would have achieved complete rectification — all because of her heart and mental focus, regardless of her actual knowledge. So she was able to achieve what only mekubalim can achieve. Amazing!
 
In a nutshell: Hashem set up the world so that women can achieve great things by taking a completely different path than men.
 
Upon being asked what a girl is taught in the womb by the angel, Rav Avigdor Miller explained she is taught “an endless Torah” of good middot, character refinement, emuna, and daat Hashem. He quotes the Vilna Gaon, who insisted that his daughters should learn all the mussar books. (The category of mussar books today includes but is not limited to: Duties of the Heart, Pathways of the Just, Ways of the Righteous, Pele Yoetz, Rav Eliyahu Dessler, etc.)
 
As Rav Miller emphasizes in tape from A Moment with Rav Avigdor Miller-Tape #459:

​This isn’t patronizing or being satisfied with "less."

​Hashem set things up so that a woman who excels in her path really does become a success, a gadol hador, and can even accomplish miracles.
 
This is a truth that both men and women need to internalize and appreciate.

For the full account of Rav Petiyah and the millstone lady:
The Jewess Mystique: The Truth about Women & Mitzvot 

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