Category: Kav Hayashar

New Rabbi Wallerstein Shiur on "Kav Hayashar"!

4/1/2019

Here's a delicious piece of news:

Rabbi Wallerstein just started giving a Tuesday shiur to Ohr Yitzchack on Kav Hayashar (which will also include material from Tomer Devorah).

Kav Hayashar is a transformative book and even though I read it once & felt I got a lot out of it, just Rabbi Wallerstein's first shiur on it gave me so much more.

(Kav Yashar is the book Rabbi Wallerstein from which he told the story of the miserly mohel and the demons, connecting it all to addiction.)

So just to reiterate: Rabbi Wallerstein will go through all 102 chapters of the Kav Hayashar every Tuesday until they finish the entire book. It's thrilling.

Here is Rabbi Wallerstein's first shiur on the Kav Hayashar:
The Newspaper Boy

For a little bit more on the Kav Hayashar, please see these posts:
Encouraging Words from the Kav Hayashar
The Demonic Draw of Dimyon

You can also find all posts on the Kav Hayashar by clicking "Kav Hayashar" under "Categories" in the sidebar or simply click HERE.

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The Kav Hayashar's Prayer for Humility

26/8/2018

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Ga'avah (haughtiness, pride, arrogance) is one of the traits that distances us from Hashem more than any other.

And according to any mussar book, it's also one of the hardest traits to uproot.

So any steps we can take in the direction toward humility and away from gaavah are really good.

Gratitude toward God is one of the most effective ways to immediately & enjoyably deflate gaavah.

And the Kav Hayashar 7 Stanza 12 offers us inspiration and a prayer to improve in this all-important area:

עַל כֵּן צָרִיךְ הָאָדָם לְהִתְפַּלֵּל לִזְכּוֹת לְמִדָּה זוֹ, כְּמוֹ שֶׁכָּתַב הֶחָסִיד בַּסֵּפֶר "שַׁלְהֶבֶת", לוֹמַר אַחַר הַתְּפִלָּה קֹדֶם "יִהְיוּ לְרָצוֹן אִמְרֵי פִי": רִבּוֹנוֹ שֶׁל עוֹלָם, זַכֵּנִי לְמִדַּת עֲנָוָה וּלְמִדַּת הַכְנָעָה, כְּדֵי שֶׁאֶהְיֶה מְקֻבָּל וּמְרֻצֶּה לָעָם. וְאַחַר כָּךְ יֹאמַר: "יִהְיוּ לְרָצוֹן וְכוּ'". וּבֶאֱמֶת שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לְהִתְגַּבֵּר בִּתְפִלָּתוֹ בִּבְכִי וְתַחֲנוּנִים לִפְנֵי הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא, שֶׁיָּסִיר מִמֶּנּוּ מִדַּת הַגַּאֲוָה וְיִדְבַּק בְּמִדַּת הָעֲנָוָה, כִּי הָרֹב בַּעֲלֵי גַּאֲוָה מֵתִים בַּחֲצִי יְמֵיהֶם. וְהָעִנְיָן, בַּעֲבוּר שֶׁזֶּהוּ בְּוַדַּאי כָּל הַמִּתְגָּאֶה הוּא שָׂנאוּי בְּעֵינֵי הַבְּרִיּוֹת, כִּי זֶה הוּא עִנְיָן רַע בְּעֵינֵיהֶם הַמִּנְהָג שֶׁל בַּעַל גַּאֲוָה, וּמַמְשִׁיךְ עָלָיו שִׂנְאַת הַבְּרִיּוֹת, וְעַל יְדֵי זֶה יָכוֹל לְהוֹצִיא אוֹתוֹ מִן הָעוֹלָם, וְגַם אִם עָלְתָה לוֹ תַּאֲוָתוֹ לִהְיוֹת רֹאשׁ הַקָּהָל אוֹ מוֹרֵה צֶדֶק לַעֲדָתוֹ, אַךְ בַּעֲבוּר גַּאֲוָתוֹ כֻּלָּם נֶחְשָׁבִים לְאַיִן כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, וּמְזַלְזֵל בִּכְבוֹד הַבְּרִיּוֹת, אֲשֶׁר גַּם זֶה הוּא סִבָּה לְקִצּוּר יָמָיו וּשְׁנוֹתָיו, רַחֲמָנָא לִצְלַן.

Therefore a person must pray that he merit this trait. The pious author of the sefer Shalheves (i.e., the Shlah) writes that at the end of the Amidah, before reciting, “May the words of my mouth be acceptable, etc.,” one should say this meditation:
“Master of the Universe, allow me to merit the traits of humility and contrition so that I will be acceptable and desirable to the people.” Afterwards, let him recite, “May the words, etc.”

In truth, a person should pray fervently to the Holy One Blessed Be He with tears and entreaties asking that He free him of arrogance and help him acquire humility.

For as a rule, arrogant people live out only half their years. The reason for this is that they are generally hated by others. This causes them to be removed from the world.

And even if such a person achieves his desire to become head of the community or rabbi of his congregation, his pride causes him to think of those under him as nothing and to belittle their honor. This is another factor in the shortening of his life span, may Heaven spare us.

So here is the short little prayer for humility below in downloadable images (in both Hebrew and English). For the Hebrew, feel free to change the verbs to feminine form if you're female, so that the Hebrew prayer would read:
Ribbono Shel Olam, zakeni l'middat anavah u'l'middat hachna'ah k'dei sheh aheyeh mekubelet u'mrutzah l'Am.

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Is What Happened to the Ancient Egyptians Also Happening Now?

22/8/2018

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Recently, I came across a section in the Kav Hayashar that describes the 10 consequences that will happen to those who oppress the Jewish people, just as these 10 consequences happened to the ancient Egyptians who oppressed Am Yisrael.

Symbolized by the 10 pieces of chametz placed around the home the night before Pesach on Bedikat Chametz (they also symbolize the 10 Plagues), the Kav Hayashar explains the following in Chapter 89:

וְקַבָּלָה הִיא בְּיָדִי מִן רַבּוֹתַי, שֶׁהָיוּ מְצַוִּים לְהַנִּיחַ חָמֵץ בַּעֲשָׂרָה מְקוֹמוֹת, נֶגֶד עֲשָׂרָה מַכּוֹת שֶׁהֵבִיא הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא עַל הַמִּצְרִים, וּכְנֶגֶד עֲשָׂרָה דִּינִים שֶׁהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא עָתִיד לְבַעֵר וּלְנַעֵר וְלִכְרוֹת וּלְהַמֵּם, לַהֲרֹס וְלַעֲקֹר וְלִנְתֹץ וְלִנְתשׁ וּלְכַלּוֹת וּלְקַעֲקֵעַ בֵּיצָתָם שֶׁל מְצֵרֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל

We have an oral tradition that our mentors used to order that leaven bread [chametz] be left in ten places. This corresponds to the ten plagues that the Holy One Blessed Be He brought upon the Egyptians as well as the ten judgments with which He will one day punish those who oppressed Israel. That is, He will 1) eradicate them, 2) shake them out, 3) cut them off, 4) confound them, 5) destroy them, 6) uproot them, 7) shatter them, 8) abandon them, 9) finish them off and 10) uproot their tessticles.

[Note: The translation for #10 is as found on Sefaria, which I believe originates with the original Metzuda text. But many thanks to an astute reader who enlightened me that this term commonly means just "to totally uproot" -- meaning, "to totally uproot their roots." The example given was Rashi on Beresheis 32:26 HERE. -- MR]

It occurred to me these judgments seem to be happening now.

True, we're not seeing them in full, but perhaps we are seeing the beginning of this process.

Our enemies, though they also attack us, mostly fight each other, eradicating each other. They're uprooting each other and shaking each other out, so to speak.

Earthquakes (a definite form of shaking) have been occurring all over, but it can't be denied they've also happened in places that contain they who oppose Israel, whether for religious reasons or political (Leftist) reasons.

And in fact, the above list strikes those who oppose the core VALUES of Yisrael, whether they politically support the State of Israel or not. And many places stricken by the above definitely reject Torah values.

Furthermore, with gender-change surgeries on the rise, we are certainly seeing a rise in the literal uprooting of the male part.

And the people who opt for these radical surgeries are people who oppose Torah values with all their might, with leaders bent on coercing the rest of society to think like them.

"Confound them" -- society is certainly becoming more and more confounded, isn't it?

Shocking things happen and no one on either side quite knows how to respond.

Just as one of many examples, President Trump's rapid ascendancy certainly confounded a great many Leftists to the point that we've seen the rise in something coined "Trump Derangement Syndrome."

And look at how many people are on psychotropic medication, especially children.

Drinking has been a problem for decades, but now there's also what's called an "opium epidemic."

People feel they can't manage life on their own.

Suicide is up among youth in America, one of the world's best places to live.

It all fits the above, except that instead of getting hit by a storm of hail, locusts, or frogs, people are doing it to themselves. (Although yes, the wildfires and volcanoes and earthquakes aren't being caused by humans.)

While those on the political right in support of traditional values (some of whom are also Jew-haters and despise our pure monotheism) view the above as a type of persecution (as I do) and a war on traditional values, I'm starting to wonder whether maybe it's not so much an attack on us, but Heavenly Judgement being carried out against them.

True, we're affected by their meshugas, but it seems like they're actually suffering more, even if they don't realize it. Or even if they misidentify the source of their suffering.

For example, those suffering from gender confusion point to society's nonacceptance of their dysphoria as the source of their suffering, but the truth is that the source of their suffering is their own dysphoria and their unwillingness to take an honest look at what really needs to be healed.

At least we have the Torah. We have Hashem. We have emuna.

What do they have?

Nothing.

As things start shaking up, confounding, uprooting, shattering, abandoning, destroying, we have the unbreakable Cord of Emuna on which to grasp tight.

They have nothing.

And this Cord of Emuna is available to anyone who wants to grasp on to it.

Anyone. You just have to grab it.

Ashreinu! Mah tov chelkeinu!

May Hashem bring the Geula in a sweet way.

Note: Sorry for the inconvenience, but my filter is inconsistent and some words can get me blocked from my own blog page and I won't be able to respond to your comments. So if you could use coded language or misspelled words (as I did above), that would be best. Sorry again.

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The Message of Your Mood: What is Your Soul Telling You?

20/8/2018

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In Chapter 71, the Kav Hayashar explains how, despite claims to the contrary, Hashem still speaks to us today.

It's much more subtle and it's filtered through our neshamah, which we sense with our nefesh (the seat of our emotions):

וְגַם צָרִיךְ לְהוֹדִיעַ: בְּעוֹד הָאָדָם בְּחַיִּים חַיּוּתוֹ, אָז הַנְּשָׁמָה מְעוֹרֶרֶת אֶת לִבּוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם לִדְבַר ה', כִּי זֶה קַבָּלָה הִיא בְּיָדִי מִסְּפָרִים קַדְמוֹנִים

It has also been passed down to us through the writings and texts of earlier generations that even while a person is still alive, his neshamah arouses his heart regarding the word of Hashem.

A Good Mood

Then the Kav Hayashar offers an interesting insight into what our moods might be telling us. He starts off by explaining the hint of a good mood:

כִּי בְּכָל עֵת שֶׁיָּבוֹא פִּתְאֹם מַחֲשָׁבָה טוֹבָה בְּלֵב שֶׁל אָדָם, מַחֲשָׁבָה שֶׁל שִׂמְחָה וְאַהֲבָה לְדִבְרֵי תּוֹרָה אוֹ מִצְוָה, אֲזַי תֵּדַע שֶׁאָז הוּא עֵת רָצוֹן שֶׁתִּהְיֶה מִתְפַּלֵּל. וְזוֹ הַתְּפִלָּה דְּבוּקָה תֵּכֶף בְּהֵיכַל מֶלֶךְ מַלְכֵי הַמְּלָכִים הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא

You should know that whenever a good thought suddenly enters a person’s heart — such as joy over or love of words of Torah or a commandment — it is a favorable time for prayer.

The prayer that one utters at that time will immediately enter the palace of the King of the kings of kings, the Holy One Blessed is He.

A Bad Mood

And the message of a bad mood?:

וּבַאֲשֶׁר שֶׁיֵּשׁ לִפְעָמִים עֵת וּזְמַן, שֶׁנַּפְשׁוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם עֲגוּמָה עָלָיו, קָרוֹב הַדָּבָר שֶׁיֵּשׁ אֵיזֶה גְּזֵרָה רָעָה חַס וְשָׁלוֹם עַל הָאָדָם אוֹ עַל קְרוֹבָיו, אוֹ גְּזֵרָה רָעָה עַל כָּל הָעוֹלָם, כִּי עַל פִּי רֹב כְּרוּזִים יוֹצְאִים וּמְעוֹרְרִין לְבָבוֹת הָאָדָם, כִּי הַלֵּב יוֹדֵעַ מָרַת נַפְשׁוֹ, אַף שֶׁבְּאָזְנָיו לֹא שָׁמַע. וְעַל כֵּן אִם יִתְעַצֵּל הָאָדָם וְלֹא יִתְפַּלֵּל תֵּכֶף, אֲזַי הַגְּזֵרָה מְמַשְׁמֶשֶׁת וּבָאָה

And if on occasion, a person experiences a moment or period that his soul is filled with melancholy, it is very likely that some evil decree has been issued against him, Heaven forbid, or upon a member of his family or upon the entire world.

In most cases when decrees are issued, heralds are then dispatched to arouse people’s hearts. For a person’s heart knows the bitterness of his soul, even if he does not hear anything with his ears.

Therefore, if a person is slothful and fails to pray immediately, the decree becomes a reality.

Occasionally, Not Chronically

Interestingly, he specifies that if a person experiences a melancholy moment or period on occasion -- sheh yesh lifa'amim, then that could likely be a "herald" dispatched to arouse people's hearts.

To me, this is an important emphasis because people who spend years in an embittered or depressed state tend to self-aggrandize. Some drift into a sort of paranoia or think that Hashem is punishing other people on their behalf when something bad happens in the world, they even feel gratified by this, chas v'shalom.

Certainly, those people should also turn to Hashem, preferably in search of gratitude, to heal their souls from their darkness.

But if a person experiences a nefesh agumah (a melancholy soul) occasionally, it could be a sign of marat nefesh (bitterness of soul) from a negative decree that only his heart senses, even though he doesn't "hear" the decree or perceive it with his other senses.

And in such a case:

עַל כֵּן יְזָרֵז הָאָדָם עַצְמוֹ וְיִתְפַּלֵּל לְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא בִּדְמָעוֹת כְּפִי כֹּחוֹ

For this reason let him arouse himself to the best of his ability to pray with tears before the Holy One Blessed Be He.

Prayer, Not Panic

Please note that he doesn't say to panic, fret, or start disasterizing when you experience the herald's call of a bad decree.

He just says that you should immediately start praying to Hashem.

And simply by doing that, you may nullify an evil decree.

May Hashem sweeten all decrees.

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The Demonic Draw of Dimyon

16/8/2018

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In Chapter 69, the Kav Hayashar presents a freaky story that occurred in Posen in the mid-1600s to a Jewish smith who kept a demoness "wife" living in his outhouse.

(However, she made the inside of the outhouse appear as a luxurious home with beautiful furnishings. And if that's not the perfect illustration for what's going on today with the allures of modern society, then I don't know what is.)

This smith had a kosher Jewish wife and children, but he kept getting pulled toward this demon-wife in a way that the Kav Hayashar describes as against the smith's will.

In fact, this smith even got up in the middle of the Pesach Seder to be with the demon-wife in the luxury-illusion outhouse for 15 minutes. His real wife, concerned about his sudden leave of absence, went to go peek through a crack in the wall and she got a real eyefull.

Fortunately, a holy Sage named Rebbe Sheftel (son of the Shlah Hakadosh) lived in their area and the human wife reported her discovery to the holy Rebbe. Rebbe Sheftel sent for the smith who admitted he had "an alien wife (ishah zarah) who was not from the seed of a human being."

Rebbe Sheftel gave the husband an amulet which broke the power of the demoness over him and forced him to separate from her.

Not long before his death, the demoness came to him weeping, protesting about how could her abandon her and her children? Then she showed him a flirty smiling face (panim sochekot), smooching and hugging and cajoling him until he agreed to grant her and her children a portion of his property: the cellar.

Yet only a short while later, something the Kav Hayashar refers to as "wars in the states of Poland from 1648 to 1658" occurred. (I assume this refers to the Khmelnystky massacres.) And the smith and all his heirs were killed during these uprisings.

Demons in the Cellar

It was only in 1680-81 that the new owners of the home discovered the real danger of the demonic entities (chitzonim) in the cellar.

It began around 1678 when a young man entered the locked cellar and 15 minutes later, was found dead on its threshold, but no one knew why.

Two years later, the entities started making trouble in the outer buildings, where people used to cook. Then the entities started wandering freely through the main living quarters, breaking things and terrifying the inhabitants.

Interestingly, they first tried a non-Jewish exorcism using Catholic priests, but it obviously didn't work.

Finally, they called on Rebbe Yoel Baal Shem of Zamusht (Zamosc) to intervene. He convened a special beit din, which he compelled the demonic entities to attend. He could hear them although he could not see them.

These chitzonim claimed to be the offspring of the Jewish smith and his demon-wife and, with no human heirs left to inherit the property, these demonic offspring insisted that they were the rightful inheritors of the smith's property and not the new unrelated owners who legally bought the property.

However, the current owners claimed true ownership for the following reasons:

They purchased the property legally from the smith and his representatives.
Demonic entities don't have the status of human offspring (zera bnei adam).
Their mother the demoness compelled the smith to cohabit with her against his will.

After hearing both sides, the beit din delivered their psak (verdict) that the demonic entities had no rights to the smith's estate, including no rights to the cellar, because their primary dwelling place is the wilderness and the forests, and not the yishuv (places of human habitation).

Then Rebbe Yoel Baal Shem Tov bound the entities by oath to leave the smith's estate (including the cellar) and go to the wilderness and the forest.

The Kav Hayashar concludes the saga by saying:

הֲרֵי לְךָ רְאָיָה בְּרוּרָה, שֶׁהֶעָווֹן הַזֶּה גּוֹרֵם כְּשֶׁהָאָדָם נִדְבַּק בְּלִילִית אוֹ בְּשֵׁדִית מִן כַּת מַחֲלַת, אֲזַי נֶעֱקָר הוּא מִן הָעוֹלָם וְגַם מִשְׁפַּחְתּוֹ, וְאֵין לוֹ שׁוּם זִכָּרוֹן בָּעוֹלָם

From this incident you have a clear demonstration that this transgression causes that when a man clings to Lilith or to one of the cohorts [kaht] of Machalat, he uproots himself and his entire family from the world until no memory of him remains.

I don't know why the man's children were also victims of his transgression, except that maybe because he obviously couldn't have proper intentions with his human wife, then that caused him to bring down blemished souls via his human wife.

And anyway, there was heavy judgement going on at that time as a horrific amount of Jews were slaughtered during those years.

The Teshuvah Cure

In his final summation of events, the Kav Hayashar writes:

עַל כֵּן יִתְרַחֵק הָאָדָם מִן הַזְּנוּת, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יָבוֹא אֵלָיו שֵׁדִית בִּדְמוּת אִשָּׁה, וְיִדְבַּק חַס וְשָׁלוֹם בּוֹ אוֹ בְּזַרְעוֹ, וְגוֹרֵם רָעָה לְעַצְמוֹ. וְהַגּוֹדֵר עַצְמוֹ בְּגָדֵר עֶרְוָה וּמִדַּבֵּק בְּאֵשֶׁת נְעוּרָיו שֶׁהִיא כְּגֶפֶן, אָז אַשְׁרֵי לוֹ וְאַשְׁרֵי לְנִשְׁמָתוֹ שֶׁלֹּא נָתַן כֹּחוֹ לְזָרִים. רַק יִהְיֶה הָאָדָם נִזְהָר מִלְּהוֹצִיא זַרְעוֹ לְבַטָּלָה. וְאִם יַגִּיעַ אֵלָיו חַס וְשָׁלוֹם חֵטְא זֶה עַל יְדֵי אֹנֶס, אֲזַי יִרְאֶה תֵּכֶף לְתַקֵּן אֶת הַפְּגָם בִּתְשׁוּבָה, וְאָז טוֹב לוֹ יִהְיֶה סֶלָה

Therefore a man must distance himself from licentious behavior lest a demoness come to him in the form of a woman and cling to him or his offspring, Heaven forbid, so that he will cause himself harm. Fortunate is the one who makes protective barriers for himself and adheres to the wife of his youth, who is likened to a grapevine. And fortunate is his soul, for he does not deliver his strength to alien entities (zarim). In any event, a man must be careful not to waste his seed.

And if this sin should overtake him against his will, Heaven forbid, let him immediately rectify the blemish through repentance. Then all will be well with him, selah.

Although the Kav Hayashar doesn't specify how this demonic relationship began, he implies that the smith wasn't careful about his personal holiness, which opened him up to being approached by a demoness. And this demonic relationship was a committed relationship because he kept referring to her as his "alien wife (ishah zarah)" and the Kav Hayashar describes it as "his soul was bound up with hers."

Also, it's worth noting that, like with the Pele Yoetz and all the other writings of tzaddikim, after the Kav Hayashar provides strict frightening warnings about a particular sin, he offers reassurance that teshuvah can still remedy everything "and then all will be well with him, selah."

Serving WHOSE Needs?

What I found interesting was that while he didn't seem to fight his inclination for the demoness, the Kav Hayashar presents the situation as if the man was going to fulfill HER needs, not his own.

As the Kav Hayashar writes:

וְהָיָה דָּר עִם שֵׁדִית אַחַת, וְהוֹלִיד בָּנִים זָרִים וּבָנִים מַשְׁחִיתִים, וְגַם הוֹלִיד מֵאִשְׁתּוֹ גַּם כֵּן בָּנִים. וְהָאִישׁ צוֹרֵף הַנִּזְכָּר לְעֵיל הָיָה לוֹ אַהֲבָה יְתֵרָה, וְנַפְשׁוֹ קְשׁוּרָה בְּנַפְשָׁהּ שֶׁל שֵׁדִית, וְלִפְעָמִים הָיָה מֻכְרָח לְבַטֵּל תְּפִלָּתוֹ וְלָצֵאת מִבֵּית הַכְּנֶסֶת לַעֲשׂוֹת רְצוֹן הַשֵּׁדִית הַנִּזְכָּר לְעֵיל

He used to cohabit with a certain female demon, who bore him “foreign sons” and “destructive sons.” He had a human wife as well, who also bore him sons.

But the smith was very much in love with the demoness to the point that his soul was bound up with hers.

Sometimes he was forced to interrupt his prayers and leave the synagogue in order to fulfill the wishes of the demoness.

The Illusion of Obsession

The Kav Hayashar notes that a demoness named Machalat "and her kaht (type, group)" can appear to men as a beautiful, laughing, playful woman.

(The term he uses is "heret lo panim sochekot - she showed him a laughing/playful/smiling face." She showed him such a face. It wasn't real, just something she showed him. Sort of like what many people do on Facebook and Instagram.)

Yet the children they created together weren't considered his real children and prohibited from inheriting him. Tragically, the man left the world with no descendants behind him, which is why the demonic offspring thought they had rights to his home until the local beit din informed them otherwise.

So it was all dimyon.

Elusive & Illusive

In modern Hebrew, dimyon translates as "imagination." But it also means "to resemble," to have a similar appearance to something.

The demoness resembled a beautiful happy woman, her relationship with the smith resembled a marriage, the results of their relationship resembled children and heirs - but in actuality, it was all nothing.

Even the outhouse resembled a luxury villa from the inside, but was only ever a simple structure encapsulating a dark stinking hole full of repulsive waste.

It was all dimyon.

Nothing concrete. Nothing real or long-lasting.

Elusive and illusive.

Interestingly, the above scenario portrays the man as leaving his family and a profoundly significant Torah obligation (Leil HaSeder) to spend 15 minutes with his demoness. Fifteen minutes! Couldn't he at least postpone it?

But no, she compelled him. The Kav Hayashar refers to this several times above:

He was forced to interrupt his prayers.
He was compelled against his will - hi hayatah kofah et hatzoref ba'al korcho."
Sometimes, licentious sins "come about by force - al yadei oness."

Yet the smith created the initial opening.

And what started out as controllable and desirable veered out of control and overtook him against his will.

And this reminds me of other stories: stories from modern times...

When Dimyon Takes Control

I've heard of women whose husbands got up in the middle of supper with an oh-so innocent "dum-dee-dum-dee-dum!" attitude to go look up unwholesome images on the Internet - photoshopped, airbrushed, carefully made-up, plastic-surgeried women with fake smiles (panim sochekot) and fake allure. These younger women also possessed such genetics that even if the kosher wives themselves underwent plastic surgery and carefully applied make-up, they could never achieve the look of these Internet bunnies.

And as for such men who can't even make it through a simple meal with his family: What a rascal of a baal taavah! It's bad enough he gazes at such images -- can't he even wait until the end of supper?

But no, he just gets up and abandons his kosher wife and children. He doesn't even care that in his wife's despair and helpless rage at his abhorrent behavior, she'll mishandle normal child mishaps (like a picky eater, a kvetchy eater, or a toddler who throws his bowl of noodles on the floor). No, he doesn't care. His need to immerse himself in these fake images is stronger than his love for his family.

Rabbi Zechariah Wallerstein has already spoken of frum girls who transgress Shabbos by texting with their friends.

Texting is mostly text, but it can include playful smiley emoticans. And the whole texting dynamic resembles a human relationship and seems fun, but it's actually highly destructive.

Furthermore, relationships conduct primarily through texting aren't at all the same as real person-to-person relationships. Yet the obsessive texting feels like a real satisfying relationship.

Finally, according to Rabbi Wallerstein, these girls care about Shabbat. Texting demands major Shabbat transgressions.

So why can't they control themselves?

In Malky Feig's heart-stirring book Mountain Climbers 2, we meet an extremely sincere frum girl named Rochy whose glance into the secular novels kept by her grandmother's non-Jewish caretaker creates an opening for a reading addiction.

She's a happy girl who likes her school and family, yet these trashy novels sucked her in.

She fights their pull ("Why was I doing this if I knew it wasn't right for me?") At one point, she resists picking up the alluring novel and instead picks up a siddur and begs Hashem to help her: "Please, Tatte, please! Help me remain pure. You know how badly I want to serve you in sanctity...Please, Tatte, cleanse me. Don't let me fall now. Help me resist this overpowering temptation..."

After such sincere heartfelt prayer, Rochy states: "I was sure my battle was over."

Then: "Sunday morning, however, I was once again under the spell."

Rochy finds herself living a double-life of a dedicated frum girl who teaches popular classes in Yiddishkeit to adoring students while secretly consuming forbidden reading material at every opportunity.

She's aware of her hypocrisy and hates herself for it. But she still can't stop.

Then, just like the mesmerized smith 3 centuries ago, this frum girl leaves her family Seder to huddle next to the light of the upstairs bathroom to immerse herself in the mesmerizing secular novel hidden there.

Again, a novel's characters aren't real, but as any voracious reader knows, the world of a compellingly written novel feels real.

(Another interesting correlation to the story that began with the smith: The demons ended up in the cellar, then spread throughout the house. Likewise, Rochy's "demons" -- the trashy novels -- were located in the basement, then spread to her room and she ended up carrying around the images in her head wherever she went, as if her "demons" and left the basement and spread out.)

Yet that plunge to rock-bottom forced Rochy to realize how low she'd fallen.

Again she turned to Hashem with her whole heart and begged Him to forgive her and rescue her from her compulsion.

And she succeeded. She refused to finish the novel that took her out of the Pesach Seder and needed to physically restrain herself from descending to the converted basement of her grandmother's apartment where the novels lay.

As time went by, she felt freer from her addiction. Eventually, she was able to go down to visit her grandmother without feeling the allure of the novels. Occasionally, she felt a twinge, but she fortified herself by thinking of what she wanted to be and how short life is.

"Life was too short, our souls far too precious, to blemish with temporal indulgence."

And just like our tzaddikim promise, sincere teshuvah cured her of her unwanted compulsion.

In the above scenarios, everyone is shown panim sochekot - appealing fictional characters and situations, emoticons and textspeak, women with fake come-hither looks...

Interestingly, many people caught in the above situations express a helplessness. They want to stop, they're distressed and mortified by their behavior, but they feel they can't stop.

Men addicted to disgusting images describe their self-disgust and the measures they take to stop themselves, but as if compelled, they find themselves at the computer yet again.

Facebook is another source of panim sochekot. People tend to post images and announcements that show them in the best light, happy and successful. Many people feel addicted to Facebook, even as studies show that Facebook makes them feel worse. Nonetheless, so many feel compelled to constantly check their Facebook.

I can't know what's really going on here, but the similarities of modern addictions to the story of the smith and his demonic cohabitation are too much to be ignored.

Yet the frum girl above managed to disengage from her compulsion by turning to Hashem and the Kav Hayashar promises us the teshuvah is not only possible, but effective.

May Hashem help all of us overcome all our "demons."

Note: I tweaked some of the translation above to reflect the more literal meaning of the words. Yet much of the Hebrew is included here for your edification, along with a transliteration of many phrases included in the English translation. The entire Hebrew text with its English translation are available on Sefaria as linked above to Chapter 69.

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A Peek into the Deeper Meaning of a "Regular" Parsha

15/8/2018

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One of the many unique aspects of Torah is the increasingly deeper level of meaning inherent in even the most seemingly mundane verse.

For example, the story of Avraham Avinu and Sara Imeinu isn't only about the actions and interactions of our first Jews. It also represents the actions and interactions of the Sefirot in a completely different dimension. In addition, there are many more layers of meaning to every word of their story inscribed in the Torah.

In other words, the Torah is not only true, but it's truer in more profound ways than we could ever imagine.

For example, the Kav Hayashar Chapter 42. He refers to a well-known section of the Chumash that seems to "only" discuss an aspect of Jewish Law. Yet the Kav Hayashar gleans from the Zohar an underlying lesson for which the halachic description is pure metaphor:

-כְּתִיב

וּבַת כֹּהֵן כִּי תִהְיֶה אַלְמָנָה וּגְרוּשָׁה וְזֶרַע אֵין לָהּ, וְשָׁבָה אֶל בֵּית אָבִיהָ כִּנְעוּרֶיהָ, בִּתְרוּמַת הַקֳּדָשִׁים לֹא תֹאכֵל וְכוּ

מִקְרָא זֶה נִדְרָשׁ בַּזֹּהַר, דִּמְרַמֵּז עַל הַנְּשָׁמָה, שֶׁנִּבְרֵאת לֵילֵךְ לְהַגּוּף לְתַקְּנָהּ וּלְקַשְּׁטָהּ בְּמַעֲשִׂים טוֹבִים; וּכְשֶׁהָאָדָם עוֹשֶׂה עֲבֵרָה וּפוֹגֵם אֶת נִשְׁמָתוֹ — אָז הַנְּשָׁמָה צוֹעֶקֶת אֶל ה' וְאוֹמֶרֶת: נְתָנַנִי ה' בִּידֵי לֹא אוּכַל קוּם! וְהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא שׁוֹמֵעַ צַעֲקָתָהּ וְאוֹמֵר לָהּ: נְשָׁמָה, בִּתִּי הַחֲבִיבָה, מְגֻדֶּלֶת אַתְּ הָיִית בְּאוֹר הַכָּבוֹד תַּחַת כִּסֵּא כְּבוֹדִי וְנִקְרֵאת "בַּת חֲבִיבָה", וְהוֹרַדְתִּיךְ אֲנִי לְגוּף הָאָדָם, וְהָיִיתִי סוֹבֵר לְהַעֲלוֹתֵךְ לְמַעֲלוֹת מַעְלָה מַעְלָה בְּמַעֲשֵׂה הָאָדָם הַטּוֹב; וְעַכְשָׁו שֶׁחָטָא הָאָדָם, הִיא יְרִידָה לְךָ, שֶׁיָּרַדְתָּ מֵאִגְרָא רָמָא לְבִירָא עֲמִיקְתָּא, לְגוּף הָאָדָם, וְנִקְרָא הַנְּשָׁמָה עַכְשָׁו 'גְּרוּשָׁה', כִּי הַנְּשָׁמָה נִתְגָּרְשָׁה מִמְּקוֹמָהּ בְּעַל כָּרְחָהּ. וַה' יִתְבָּרַךְ שׁוֹמֵעַ צַעֲקָתָהּ וְנוֹטֵל הַנְּשָׁמָה מֵהַגּוּף וּמְצָרְפָהּ עַל יְדֵי דִּינִים. וְאַחַר כְּלוֹת הַצֵּרוּף וְהַדִּינִים הִיא מִתְעַנֶּגֶת וְאוֹכֶלֶת מֵעֹנֶג אָבִיהָ שֶׁבַּשָּׁמַיִם

It is written-- “And when the daughter of a Kohein shall be widowed or divorced, having no offspring, and she returns to her father’s house as in her youth…” (Vayikra 22:13) [and in the previous verse it is written,] “…she shall not eat of an offering of the holy things.”

According to the Zohar (2:95b; 3:7a) this is an allusion to the soul.

The soul was created to enter the body in order that it should be rectified and adorned with good deeds.

But when a person transgresses, he blemishes his soul, causing it to cry out to Hashem, saying, “Hashem has delivered me into the hands of one against whom I cannot stand” (Eichah 1:14).

When the Holy One Blessed is He hears this cry, He says to the soul, “My precious daughter, you were raised in illumination and honor beneath the Throne of Glory and were called, ‘precious daughter.’

"Then I lowered you into a human body, intending to elevate you to the highest levels through that human being’s good deeds. But now that he has sinned you have been degraded, plummeting from a lofty rooftop to the deep pit of the human body.”

At this point the soul becomes known as a “divorcee” because it is banished from its place against its will (“divorced” and “banished” are expressed by the same word in Hebrew).

But Hashem hears its cry and takes the soul from the body and purifies it though chastisements, after which it is able to relish the delights of its Heavenly Father.

See?

So yes, this scenario as written in the Torah provides us with guiding laws and insights.

But there is also the whole other hidden meaning described above, which seems unrelated to the straightfoward meaning, yet has everything to do with it.

And this still isn't even the whole meaning behind these verses. There's much more, but this is enough to make the point.

The above is just one of many reasons why rationalist arguments regarding the Torah fall short. The Torah and all it encompasses is far, far more than the 3 dimensions we perceive.

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How to Deal with Quickly Answered Prayers & Unanswered Prayers from the Kav Hayashar

14/8/2018

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In Chapter 64, the Kav Hayashar offers both comfort for unanswered prayers and guidance in prayer. The following contain just a few excerpts from that chapter:

Avoid Pride from Answered Prayers

דָּוִד הַמֶּלֶךְ עָלָיו הַשָּׁלוֹם כָּתַב בְּסֵפֶר תְּהִלִּים (ד, ב): "בְּקָרְאִי עֲנֵנִי אֱלֹהֵי צִדְקִי... חָנֵּנִי וּשְׁמַע תְּפִלָּתִי". נִרְאֶה לְפָרֵשׁ הַפָּסוּק עַל פִּי מַה שֶּׁאָמְרוּ רַבּוֹתֵינוּ זִכְרוֹנָם לִבְרָכָה: כָּל הַמְבַקֵּשׁ רַחֲמִים בִּתְפִלָּתוֹ וְנַעֲנָה מִיָּד — אַל יִתְגָּאֶה בִּתְפִלָּתוֹ בִּשְׁבִיל כָּךְ, לַחֲשֹׁב בְּלִבּוֹ שֶׁהוּא צַדִּיק בַּאֲשֶׁר שֶׁנִּתְקַבֵּל תְּפִלָּתוֹ מִיָּד

King Dovid wrote in the book of Tehillim, “Answer me when I call out, God of my righteousness…, be gracious to me and hear my prayer” (4:2).

I believe this verse can be understood in light of the Sages teaching that if person’s prayers are answered immediately he must not become conceited and suppose it to be on account of his righteousness.

וְזֶהוּ כַּוָּנַת דָּוִד הַמֶּלֶךְ בְּאָמְרוֹ: בְּקָרְאִי עָנֵנִי, אֱלֹהֵי צִדְקִי, אָכֵן לֹא תֵּכֶף וּמִיָּד, אֶלָּא: חָנֵּנִי וּשְׁמַע תְּפִלָּתִי, וְאַחַר כָּךְ תֵּן וּתְמַלֵּא בַּקָּשָׁתִי

This is what King Dovid meant when he said, “Answer me when I call out, God of my righteousness.” That is, he did not wish to be answered immediately. He wished first to find grace and to have his prayer heard and only afterwards to have his request fulfilled.

So when Hashem answers us immediately, we shouldn't feel pride; we should feel pleasure. We should be grateful that Hashem loves us so much and so unconditionally despite our flaws.

Even a tzaddik like David Hamelech worried about his merits and whether he deserved Hashem's Compassion, so he first prayed "Chaneni - be gracious to me." He wished for Hashem's Grace despite his flaws, and then asked Hashem to hear him out.

Don't Despair of Unanswered Prayer

וְכֵן יַחֲשֹׁב הָאָדָם בְּדַעְתּוֹ, שֶׁאַף אִם הֶאֱרִיךְ בִּתְפִלָּתוֹ וְלֹא נַעֲנָה — לֹא יִתְיָאֵשׁ מִלְּהִתְפַּלֵּל עוֹד, כִּי אַדְּרַבָּה: הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא מִתְאַוֶּה לִתְפִלָּתוֹ כְּשֶׁהִיא בְּכַוָּנָה, דְּהַיְנוּ שֶׁיִּהְיֶה הַלֵּב יוֹדֵעַ לְכַוֵּן לְמַה שֶּׁהַפֶּה מְדַבֵּר

By the same token, a person who prays at length and is not answered should not despair of praying again.

For the Holy One Blessed is He does indeed desire his prayers but He desires that they be with proper intent. That is, the heart must concentrate and know what the mouth utters.

Sometimes it takes a long time for fulfillment of prayer. Even as it's frustrating or heartbreaking, repeated prayer offers the benefit of deepened humility and deeper introspection.

This is true even when the answer is "No."

After her son Nachshon was kidnapped and murdered by terrorists during a rescue attempt by Israeli commandos, Esther Wachsman noted that Jews prayed for 2000 years to come Home. The fact that we are able to live in Eretz Yisrael is the result of all those seemingly unanswered prayers.

"Eventually," she said, "the time comes for a prayer's fulfillment."

One of the commandos involved in the mission was a secular guy who told Nachshon's father:
"You know, you are probably wondering what happened to all the prayers and mitzvot and chapters of Tehillim everyone said for your son. But I'll tell you. Because we know exactly what happened to them. You see, when we were in that house holding your son, we all should have died. We have no idea how we were alive today...it should not have happened. You see, all of those prayers said for the Jewish soldier Nachshon Wachsman are the only reason any of us are alive today. Hashem took all those prayers and, for whatever reason, used them to save different soldiers."

Final Tips for Potent Prayers

הַכְּלָל הָעוֹלֶה מִפֶּרֶק זֶה: שֶׁטּוֹב לָאָדָם לְהִתְפַּלֵּל מְעַט בְּכַוָּנָה וּלְהָרִים יָדָיו וְאֶצְבָּעוֹתָיו בַּתְּפִלָּה וּבַבְּרָכוֹת וְהוֹדָאוֹת וּבִקְרִיאַת שְׁמַע וּבַתְּפִלָּה שֶׁל "וּבָא לְצִיּוֹן", וְיַרְחִיק עַצְמוֹ מִן הַגֶּזֶל וּמִמָּמוֹן שֶׁאֵינוֹ שֶׁל ישֶׁר — אֲזַי אֲנִי עָרֵב בַּעֲדוֹ, שֶׁחֵפֶץ ה' יַצְלִיחַ בְּיָדוֹ בָּעוֹלָם הַזֶּה, וּשְׂכָרוֹ יִהְיֶה כָּפוּל בָּעוֹלָם הַבָּא, כְּמַאֲמַר הַמְשׁוֹרֵר: וּמָאתַיִם לַנּוֹטְרִים אֶת פִּרְיוֹ

To summarize what we have learned in this chapter:
~It is better for a person to pray for a shorter amount of time with concentration than for a longer time without it.
~And let him raise his hands and fingers whenever he prays, utters blessings, gives thanks or recites the Shema or the prayer “And a redeemer will come.”
~Let him distance himself from theft and from all ill-gotten gain.

Then I will be his guarantor that Providence will cause him to prosper in this world and that his reward will be double in the next world. As it states, “And two hundred for those guarding its fruit” (Shir HaShirim 8:12).

May all our prayers be fulfilled l'tovah.

To see the original article on Nachshon Wachsman quoted above:
When God Says No - The Story of Nachshon Wachsman

To read a moving essay by his mother, Esther Wachsman:
His Name was Nachshon Wachsman

For more posts quoting the Kav Hayashar on various topics:
Inspirational Kav Hayashar

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The Kav Hayashar on Hitbodedut

13/8/2018

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The Kav Hayashar preceded Chassidus by decades and preceded Breslov by nearly a century. (Meaning, he could not have been influenced by any kind of Chassidus.)

Yet as is true throughout kabbalistic work, mussar masterpieces, and commentaries on Tanach and Talmud, the same fundamentals form a golden thread of Torah-Truth that runs through all of them.

The following is taken from Chapter 12 of the Kav Hayashar:

וְכֹה יַחְשֹׁב הָאָדָם בְּכָל יוֹם וָיוֹם בְּעֵת הִתְבּוֹדֵד, שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לְהִתְבּוֹדֵד

(עַיֵּן פֶּרֶק א)

לְתַקֵּן חֲטָאָיו פְּשָׁעָיו בִּזְרִיזוּת. וְחִיּוּב גָּדוֹל הוּא לְהִתְבּוֹדֵד הֵיטֵב, וְאוּלַי עַל יְדֵי כֵּן יֵעָרֶה עָלָיו מִמָּרוֹם רוּחַ חָכְמָה וּבִינָה וָדַעַת וְיִרְאַת ה' לְהַדְרִיכוֹ בַּדֶּרֶךְ הַיְשָׁרָה, לְבַל יִמּוֹט מִדַּרְכֵי תּוֹרָתֵנוּ הַקְּדוֹשָׁה. וְאִלּוּ הָיִינוּ זוֹכִים בְּמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֵינוּ לְהַשָּׂגַת הָרִאשׁוֹנִים, הָיְתָה הַשָּׂגָתֵנוּ שְׁלֵמָה לְהַשִּׂיג חֶפְצֵנוּ וּמִשְׁאֲלוֹתֵינוּ לְטוֹבָה

Let a man reflect day in and day out, in the time that he sets aside for introspection (eit hitboded), that he must take himself aside and rectify his sins and transgressions with all alacrity (see Chapter One).

It is absolutely essential that a person introspect (l'hitboded) well, for then perhaps a spirit of wisdom, understanding, knowledge and fear of Heaven will come upon him from On High to guide him along the straight path and keep him from straying from the ways of our Holy Torah.

If only our deeds were pure enough to merit the understanding of earlier generations, then our comprehension would be complete and we would attain whatever we desired.

As you can see, the idea of hitbodedut is not an invention of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov and is not even an innovation of Chassidus. The Kav Hayashar mentions it by the familiar Hebrew word l'hitboded, utilizing it in the with which we're familiar.

Furthermore, it's clearly not something only for tzaddikim because the Kav Hayashar insists that it's a chiyuv hagadol, a great obligation (translated above as "absolutely essential"), for a person to introspect - l'hitboded - on a daily basis.

The Malbim on Hitbodedut

The Malbim on Melachim/Kings I 19:3-13 (the Haftarah for Parshat Pinchas) also uses the term l'hitboded to explain Eliyahu Hanavi's actions. Please click the following link to read about it:
What Eliyahu Hanavi's Self-Imposed Isolation Teaches Us

True, the Malbim came after Chassidus and Breslov, but he himself wasn't chassidish as far as I know. Yet his commentary on these verses sound a heck of a lot like the Kav Hayashar and core Breslov philosophy.

Even if the Malbim was inspired specifically by Breslov, he wouldn't include such ideas in his commentaries unless he fully agreed with them.

Hitbodedut: It's the Torah Way

The common thread running through Chazal of any era and of any ethnicity living anywhere in the world is a focus on daily self-scrutiny and pouring out your heart directly to Hashem.

And just in the interest of full disclosure:
Do I manage a full self-scrutiny every single day?

No. I want to. I'd like to. I know I'm obligated to.

But while I manage some kind of self-scrutiny, cheshbon hanefesh, teshuvah almost every day, a more thorough self-accounting sometimes occurs only on Shabbat. Or "just" 3 times a week. Or whatever. It depends.

Yet even once a week (or once a month) is a million-billion times better than doing it just once a year or not doing it at all.

And the above gives me the chizuk to keep at it, even though I'm far from perfect about it.

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A Prayer for Teshuvah from the Kav Hayashar

3/8/2018

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Here's more inspiration and encouragement from the Kav Hayashar, Chapter 5:

שֶׁתּוֹעֶלֶת גָּדוֹל הוּא תְּפִלּוֹת צַדִּיקִים לַנְּשָׁמוֹת הַנִּדָּחוֹת, וְאֵין לְךָ גְּמִילוּת חֶסֶד גָּדוֹל מִזֶּה, וְאַף כִּי אָנוּ אֵינֶנּוּ מֵאַנְשֵׁי הַצַּדִּיקִים הַקּוֹדְמִים, וְהַלְוַאי שֶׁתּוֹעִיל תְּפִלָּתֵנוּ לְתוֹעֶלֶת עַצְמֵנוּ, לְכַפֵּר חַטֹּאתֵינוּ וּפְשָׁעֵינוּ שֶׁהִכְעַסְנוּ לַבּוֹרֵא יִתְבָּרַךְ בְּמֶרֶד וּבְמַעַל, אַף עַל פִּי כֵן הַיּוֹדֵעַ מַחֲשָׁבוֹת הַטּוֹבוֹת, לִהְיוֹת זֶה מֵהַמְזַכִּים בִּתְפִלָּתָם גַּם לַנְּשָׁמוֹת הַנִּדָּחוֹת, כִּי רַב חֶסֶד הוּא הַבּוֹרֵא יִתְבָּרַךְ, וְזֶה יֵאוֹת לְכָל בַּר יִשְׂרָאֵל לִהְיוֹת זוֹכֶה וּמְזַכֶּה לַאֲחֵרִים. וּמִכָּל שֶׁכֵּן שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לְהִתְפַּלֵּל עַל רִשְׁעֵי הַדּוֹר שֶׁיַּחְזְרוּ בִּתְשׁוּבָה, כִּדְאִיתָא בַּגְּמָרָא דִּבְרָכוֹת (י, א), בִּבְרוּרְיָא דְּבִיתְהוּ דְרַבִּי מֵאִיר שֶׁאָמְרָה: "יִתַּמּוּ חַטָּאִים" כְּתִיב (תְּהִלִּים קד, לה), וְלֹא חוֹטְאִים. עַל כֵּן אֲסַדֵּר אֲנִי לְפָנֶיךָ לְכָל אִישׁ וְאִשָּׁה, לוֹמַר יְהִי רָצוֹן זֶה בְּבִרְכַּת "הֲשִׁיבֵנוּ אָבִינוּ לְתוֹרָתֶךָ, וְקָרְבֵנוּ מַלְכֵּנוּ לַעֲבוֹדָתֶךָ", וְיֹאמַר:

...the prayers of the righteous are of tremendous benefit to the souls of the banished.

There can be no greater act of loving-kindness than this.

Obviously we are not in the same league as the righteous of earlier generations. We would have reason enough to be thankful if our prayers were adequate to benefit ourselves and to atone for the sins and transgressions and the rebelliousness and deceit with which we have angered our Creator.

Nevertheless, one should strive to be among those who benefit these banished souls with their prayers and then the Creator, may He be blessed, will exercise His abundant loving-kindness.

Indeed it is fitting for every Jew to strive to benefit others.

One should pray especially on behalf of the wicked of the generation that they should repent.

Thus we learn in Berachos (10a) that Rabbi Meir’s wife Beruryah said to him, “It is written, ‘let sin come to an end’ (Tehillim 104:35), not the sinners!”

Therefore I will set out here for the use of every man and woman a Yehi ratzon prayer to be added to the blessing, “Return us our Father to Your Torah and draw us near to Your service,” the fifth blessing of the Amidah. The text of the prayer is as follows:

וְאָז יִתְעוֹרֵר גַּם הָאָדָם מֵעַצְמוֹ לַעֲשׂוֹת תְּשׁוּבָה עַל חֲטָאָיו, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יֵאָמֵר לוֹ "קְשֹׁט עַצְמְךָ וְאַחַר כָּךְ קְשֹׁט אֲחֵרִים". רַק שֶׁיֹּאמַר בְּכַוָּנַת הַלֵּב, וְאָז בַּעַל הָרַחֲמִים, בְּרֹב חֲסָדָיו וּבְרֹב רַחֲמָיו, יְקַבֵּל תְּפִלָּתוֹ. וְאַף שֶׁצָּרִיךְ תְּפִלָּה זוֹ כַּוָּנוֹת וְיִחוּדִים, וְאֵין אָנוּ בְּקִיאִים בְּשֵׁמוֹת וּבְצֵרוּפִים, הַמּוֹעִילִים לְתוֹעֶלֶת גָּדוֹל, מִכָּל מָקוֹם יִתְפַּלֵּל בִּקְצָרָה, וִיבַקֵּשׁ בְּהֶגְיוֹן לֵב, כִּי כָּךְ רָאוּי וְנָכוֹן לְכָל הַמִּתְפַּלֵּל, שֶׁלֹּא יַאֲרִיך הַכֹּל בִּשְׂפָתָיו, כִּי יַשְׁאִיר לוֹ בְּהֶגְיוֹן לִבּוֹ.

After reciting this, a person will arouse himself as well to repent for his sins so that they will not chide him, “Adorn yourself and then adorn others!”

If he will only recite this prayer with heartfelt intent surely the Merciful One, in His abundant loving-kindness and mercy, will accept his prayer.

And even though this prayer should really be accompanied by esoteric meditations in which we are not fluent, nevertheless, let him pray briefly and think these requests in his heart. For it is proper for everyone to leave such requests to the meditations of the heart and not speak out everything with his lips.

You might already have this prayer in your siddur in the proper place. If not, you've likely seen it in a siddur.

Either way, this is the source for the prayer and here it is if you don't have it in your siddur.

May we all do teshuvah from love and not from trials or tribulations.

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The Cleansing Compassion of Accepting Troubles with Love

31/7/2018

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When struggling through a day in which I experienced a lot of physical pain and also lots of minor yet very frustrating obstacles every which way I turned (and having just faced a huge disappointment the day before), I came across this from the Kav Hayashar, Chapter 31:

וּמִזֶּה תִּרְאֶה, שֶׁזֻּהֲמַת הַסִּטְרָא אָחֳרָא הִיא דָּבָר מַמָּשׁ, הַנִּדְבָּק בְּגוּף הָאָדָם, וְאִי אֶפְשָׁר לְהִתְלַבֵּן וּלְהִתְרוֹקֵן אִם לֹא עַל יְדֵי יִסּוּרִים, כִּי אֵין יִסּוּרִין בְּלֹא חִמּוּם הַגּוּף. אַף הֲסָרַת הַכְּתָמִים מִן הַמַּרְאוֹת הַצּוֹבְאוֹת אִי אֶפְשָׁר לְהַעֲבִיר אִם לֹא עַל יְדֵי גַּחֲלֵי אֵשׁ, וְאָז יַחֲזֹר הַשְּׁפִּיגֶל כְּמוֹ שֶׁהָיָה בָּרִאשׁוֹנָה. כֵּן הָאָדָם אֵין לוֹ כַּפָּרָה עַל חֶטְאוֹ, אִם לֹא שֶׁצָּרִיךְ לְהִתְלַבֵּן בְּחִמּוּם הַיִּסּוּרִים כַּנִּזְכָּר. וּכְשֶׁאָדָם מְקַבֵּל הַיִסּוּרִים בְּאַהֲבָה וּבְחִבָּה מֵאֵת ה', אָז הוּא מַתִּישׁ כֹּחַ הִתְפַּשְּׁטוּת זֻהֲמַת הַסִּטְרָא אָחֳרָא. וְחָלִילָה לָאָדָם, שֶׁיִּבְעַט בְּיִסּוּרָיו, אֶלָּא יְקַבֵּל עָלָיו הַכֹּל בְּאַהֲבָה וּבְחִבָּה, הֵן בְּיִסּוּרִים שֶׁל גּוּפוֹ וְהֵן יִסּוּרֵי מָמוֹנוֹ, כִּי יֵשׁ אֵיזֶה אֲנָשִׁים — אִם יִקְרֶה לוֹ אֵיזֶה הֶזֵּק מָמוֹן — אֲזַי הוּא מִתְחַמֵּם וּמִתְלַהֵב בְּלֵב רַגָּז, וּמֵרִיב וּמְחַרְחֵר רִיב עִם הַבְּרִיּוֹת — זֶהוּ אֲשֶׁר בּוֹעֵט בַּיִּסּוּרִין. אֶלָּא יִהְיֶה שָׁיֵף עָיֵל וְשָׁיֵף נָפִיק בְּלֵב נִשְׁבָּר וְנִדְכֶּה וּבְהַכְנָעָה, וְיֹאמַר תָּמִיד: ה' נָתַן וַה' לָקַח, יְהִי שֵׁם ה' מְבֹרָךְ. בְּזֶה מְעוֹרֵר רַחֲמִים שֶׁרוֹאֶה בּוֹ הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא הַכְנָעָה דִּילֵיהּ

One can understand, then, that the filth of the Sitrah Acharah is a tangible substance clinging to a person’s body, from which it is impossible to be cleansed without afflictions.

These cleanse because all afflictions are accompanied by a warming of the body. Therefore just as the stains on the mirror can only be removed with hot coals, after which it returns to its original appearance, so too a person can only achieve atonement through scorching, which is achieved through the heating of the body caused by afflictions.

When one accepts Hashem’s afflictions with love and affection he diminishes the power of the filth from the Sitrah Acharah to spread.

Therefore Heaven forbid that a person remonstrate against his afflictions!

Rather let him accept them with love and affection, whether they strike his body or his money.

For some individuals become very worked up and excited if they suffer any financial harm. Then with hearts filled brimming with ire then enter into conflicts and quarrels with others. This is the way of those who remonstrate against afflictions.

Instead let a person enter humbly and exit humbly, with a broken and contrite heart and with submissiveness. And let him say on every occasion, “Hashem gave and Hashem has taken, may Hashem’s name be blessed” (Iyov 1:21).

In this way he will arouse Heaven’s mercy, for the Holy One Blessed is He will take note of his submission.

It's nothing new, really.

But coming from a tzaddik similar to Rav Yehudah Petiyah and all those who understand what's going on in other worlds in other dimensions with spirits and beings most of us cannot perceive, it means a lot when Rav Tzvi Hirsch says that accepting afflictions and suffering with love (i.e., saying "Thank You, Hashem!" or "This too is for the best!" or "Baruch Hashem!") really does cleanse us AND "arouse Hashem's mercy."

May we all succeed in repenting from love without needing afflictions.

Related Post:
Encouraging Words from the Kav Hayashar
The One Thing to Say in Times of Great Stress

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A Prayer for Teshuvah from the Kav Hayashar

The Cleansing Compassion of Accepting Troubles with Love

Myrtle Rising

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