You can see past Purim posts by clicking "Purim" in the Archives list on the sidebar, or simply click this link: http://www.myrtlerising.com/blog/category/purim

If you don't feel like scrolling through it all, here are the most essential:

• A Spiritual Remedy Guaranteed to Work on the Fast of Esther (Hidabroot)
• UPDATED: A Special Segulah for the Fast of Esther!
• How to Overcome the Terrorist-Klippah of Zeresh
• How to Drink on Purim: Rav Avigdor Miller
• Powerful New Video Clip: The Most Effective Response to Jew-Hatred
• How to Avoid being a Pathological Pollyanna

A wonderful reader just sent me the following information, indicating that today, the 23rd of Sivan (June 26 this year) is an auspicious day for tefillah. 

Why?

Indicated by the following:

• In Megillas Esther (8:9), the verse states:

ויקראו סופרי המלך בעת ההיא בחודש השלישי הוא חודש סיון בשלושה ועשרים בו... ויכתוב ככל אשר ציווה מרדכי אל היהודים... והעיר שושן צהלה ושמחה

On the 23rd day of the 3rd month--“Hu Chodesh Sivan” -the king’s scribes wrote all that Mordechai had dictated to them.
   

• Achashveirosh had permitted them to write in the letters--”Katov Be’eynechem--whatever is favorable in your eyes, in the name of the King...”

 

• On 23 Sivan, 355 BCE, Hashem overturned Haman's decree to destroy the Jewish people.

 

• The Luach Davar B’Ito writes that one should recite the relevant verses in Megillat Esther (Esther 8:3-17)

 

• The Lubavitcher Rebbe said, that this is a most auspicious day - as it says in the Megilla that on Chof Gimmel Sivan, "the scribes of the king wrote everything Mordechai commanded".

 

• The King also refers to the Melech Malchei Ha’malachim. 

 

• Every Yid can decree whatever he wants, and the scribes of the King will assure that everything is done according to his/her will.

 

• And from In the Days of Mashiach: 23rd of Sivan - Muchan L'Tovah:

In the name of the Makover Rebbe, Zt’l, the day is Mesugal [auspicious] for nisim v’niflaos [miracles & wonders], as implied by the Pasuk referred to above--“Now, write [on this day] about the Jews what is favorable in your eyes in the name of the King”--which also refers to the King of the World. Thus, just as Mordechai subsequently left the King with many royal garments (ibid., 8:15)…so can we!

(It's very worth reading the whole article.)

May we all find the opportunity to use this special day and may all our tefillot be answered l'tovah.

(And thank you, wonderful reader, who alerted us to this special opportunity.)

For a few years now, I've been concerned about the response of the Jewish newspapers (including blogs) to acts of Jew-hatred and any kind of discrimination against Jews.

Jews who aren't fully committed to Torah observance mean well, yet lack the knowledge to respond properly.

But even some frum Jews get sidetracked - and again, it's all with the best of intentions.

Everybody cares about our fellow Jews getting hurt or harassed.

But much of what people mention is either not the solution or not the full solution.

I wanted to write a post on this, but Toras Avigdor beat me to it by putting out a brilliant 8:24-minute video.

In the clip, Rav Avigdor Miller explains how to completely overturn even the most genocidal gezeirah.

Then, at 5:25, he does something he acknowledges that many people don't like (but he does it anyway because it's absolutely necessary & absolute emet); he speaks of what he personally witnessed in Europe leading up to the Shoah, after Hitler (yemach shemo) was already in power...and what we can learn from this to apply to our times.

And also, in the name of the Chafetz Chaim, he blames the newspapers run by assimilated Jews.

And while this blog is far from being a newspaper, blog posts are the modern take on newspaper columns. So I'm taking his comments as personal mussar for myself too.

Anyway, the video packs a powerful punch. Yashar koach to Toras Avigdor for putting together such an important message at such a crucial time.

Here it is:
Rav Avigdor Miller on Our Response to Antisemitism (Please scroll down to the last video.)

Note #1: It looks like this class was filmed in Rav Miller's later years. There are English subtitles for those who can't hear the rav clearly.

Note #2: Also, at minute 6:30, Rav Miller quotes the Chafetz Chaim regarding the Jewish community there of that time: "...ki ein bayit asher ein sham mes - There was no home which didn't have there a mes" from Sefer Shemot 12:30, regarding the Plague of the Firstborn in Egypt.

In Sefer Shemot, the word mes (or met) means "dead." But in the clip, Rav Miller translates it as "spoiled" for a metaphorical interpretation. (Please see Yaak's comment below for clarification.)

​May Mashiach please come in a sweet way.

Please see A Spiritual Remedy Guaranteed to Work on the Fast of Esther to see how you can effect your own salvation (or the salvation of others).

The fast starts at the crack of dawn on Wednesday morning, and you need to start the segulah from that moment.

​Throughout Jewish history, Hashem has put our greatest Jews in highly suspicious circumstances:

• Avraham Avinu, the preeminent oppose of human sacrifice, appeared to be about to sacrifice his own son.

 

• The birth of Yitzchak Avinu after Sara Imeinu’s imprisonment in Avimelech’s palace cast false aspersions on the status of both Sara Imeinu and Yitzchak Avinu.

 

• Moshe Rabbeinu was suspected of impropriety with women (despite a total lack of evidence), among other things.

 

• The Jewish children of Megillat Esther were unjustly imprisoned.

 

• The Talmud presents several instances of very holy Sages going to jail or even execution for either false charges or unjust charges (like keeping Torah & mitzvot).

 

• Likewise, great tzaddikim such as the Ohr Hachaim, the Ben Ish Chai, Malbim, Rav Levi Yitchak Bender, Rav Eliyahu Chaim Rosen went to prison on either false or unjust charges.

 

• Others, such as Rebbe Nachman & Rebbe Nosson of Breslev, struggled against the onslaught completely baseless slander.

 
And so it goes in the story of Purim. 

​Queen Esther’s presence in the Persian palace gave hope and comfort to the Jews of her time.
 
Yet in inviting Haman to a private party with the king, Esther Hamalkah extinguished even that straggling glimmer of hope.
 
But it was exactly that lost hope which propelled the Jews to pray from the depths of the heart, effecting their own salvation.
 
Esther Hamalkah was not a traitor after all. She was even wiser, more perceptive, more faithful, and more courageous than they’d ever realized.
 
And so it goes throughout Jewish history.

​For some reason, it seems that many truly great Jews must go through the nisayon of denouncement, baseless slander, false accusations, and unjust imprisonment.
 
And while the Torah’s obligations regarding justice & self-protection preclude us from assuming the best about non-tzaddikim when the evidence is clearly against them, we can still give the benefit of the doubt to the real greats.
 
The Yismach Moshe, Rebbe Moshe Teitelbaum (1759 – 17 July 1841), remembered himself in a previous incarnation as a member of Sanhedrin in the time of the Moshe Rabbeinu-Korach controversy.
 
While all his fellow Sages joined the camp of Korach (the masses followed Moshe Rabbeinu), the Yismach Moshe-as-Sanhedrin-Member retained a certain doubt as to whether Korach was really in the right.
 
When his grandson expressed astonishment as to how the Yismach Moshe could have indulged in any speculation against the righteousness of Moshe Rabbeinu, the Rebbe explained that Korach's position was so persuasive, his doubt was actually very precious in Shamayim.

Ultimately, the Yismach Moshe said, "Not wanting to be part of the machlokes [controversy], I ran into my tent and closed the entrance tightly. I refused to come out until it was all over."

Astonishingly, his thoughtful doubt & refusal to pick sides became his salvation.

(For the original story, please see Not Everything is Black & White & Parshat Korah: The Jewish Eye.)

​In American culture, you’re supposed to be bold, confident, proactive, and determined. In British culture, you’re expected to be decisive and consistent. (And I don’t know enough about the others to generalize.)
 
But really (IF it's honest & not escapist), it’s okay to look at the all the facts you have & conclude:

"I’m not completely sure.”

"I don't really know how to precede."

"Something's missing, but I'm not certain what."

"I just can't decide — yet."

"I honestly don't know."

"I think I'll sit this one out until I get more clarity."

Many times, boldness and confidence in one’s position derive from insecurity (“Indecision feels uncomfortable or threatening to me”) or narcissism and immaturity.
 
(Unless, of course, the position is 100% correct. For example, I’m completely convinced of Hashem’s Existence and the Torah’s Correctness. That's not insecurity, narcissism, or immaturity — no matter what any detractors say.)
 
And I don’t mean being wishy-washy or skipping along in rose-colored blinders due to an addiction to blissful ignorance — both of which allow evil to flourish.
 
I mean investing thought and research into a subject and still unable to come to a clear conclusion.
 
Personally, the ability to hold off and say, “I’m not 100% convinced about this” is one of the major factors that led to some of my most profound spiritual growth. Not that I’m on a high level now, but you should have seen me before… ;)
 
It’s neither politically correct nor socially acceptable to retain a thoughtful & educated doubt.
 
But sometimes, it’s the only honest choice.
 
And that can actually hold weight in Shamayim.

​(Plus, you’re more likely to earn Heavenly Assistance toward resolving your doubts when you’re in a state of honesty and humility. After all, Hashem cannot stand to be anywhere near 3 types: a liar, a flatterer/hypocrite, and an arrogant person.)

Most of us are familiar with the famous liturgical poem, Shoshanat Yaakov—Rose of Jacob, which is recited after the reading of Megillat Esther on Purim.

Here are some links for lyrics & more information:
Shoshanat Yaakov with Chabad (includes an audio track)
Know the Words!: Shoshanas Yaakov (with inspiration regarding Charvona)
 
While we love singing “Baruch Mordechai Hayehudi!--Blessed is Mordechai the Jew!”, there is another stanza which reads: “Arur Zeresh eishet mafchidi—Cursed is Zeresh, the wife of my terrorist.” (That is how the book of Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender’s lectures, Words of Faith, translates mafchid: terrorist.)
 
The word mafchid is literally “a frightener” (as in “one who frightens”) or “scary one” (as in “one who scares”). So mafchidi is like my own personal frightener, one who scares & terrorizes me — my own personal “terrorist.”
 
In the name of the Arizal (Netiv Yitzchak 128), Rav Bender explains that there is a klippah (a spiritual "shell" of spiritual blockage) called “Zeresh” that injects fear into the heart of a person...and even makes him paranoid.
 
And this stanza in Shoshanat Yaakov remedies fear, as Rav Bender explains:

A great many people today understandably suffer from anxiety, fear, or even paranoia.
 
But all that anxiety and fear are really the klippah called Zeresh, the evil conniving wife of Haman.
 
B’ezrat Hashem, if we say "Arur Zeresh! — Cursed is Zeresh!" with enough heartfelt gusto, we can nullify & overcome that awful klippah.
 
(Don’t give in to terror!)

Some people have a lot of confusion about how much to drink on Purim and what ad d'lo yada (drinking until you don't know the difference between Haman and Mordechai) really means.

And some people think they know, but don't even know that they don't know & should really ask.

As usual, there are different interpretations of this and here is Rav Avigdor Miller's opinion:

Rav Miller cautions against drinking so much you fall asleep or need to be rescued by Hatzalah.

You need da'as on this holy day of Purim!

UPDATE 5780/2020: 
​
Purim for Everyone Else: Starts Monday night, March 9 & ends Tuesday night, March 10th.

Purim for Yerushalayim: Starts Tuesday night March 10 & ends Wednesday night, March 11th.

NEW!
Here is an amazing & inspiring post from Shuvu Banim:
The Correct Mindset Going into Purim

The section called "Purim Reveals the Real You" is particularly enlightening.

It's a great idea on how to make the most of Purim, which seems like a minor holiday, but in reality, Purim possesses tremendous light and spiritual power.

​May we all receive its benefit!

​The Kli Yakar on Parshat Titzaveh goes into a whole thing about what we can learn regarding the angels' reaction to King Achashverosh's appalling blasphemy of eating & drinking from the vessels of the Beit Hamikdash while wearing the garments of the High Priest.
​
Please see How to Avoid being a Pathological Pollyanna. Then scroll down a little over halfway until you get to The Mountain of Sludge and start reading from there.

On Purim, we especially emphasize joy and light.

One popular Purim melody (sung also in the weekly Havdalah) and taken from Megillat Esther 16:8 is:
לַיְּהוּדִים הָיְתָה אוֹרָה וְשִׂמְחָה וְשָׂשׂן וִיקָר
"Layehudim hayta ora v'simcha v'sasson viy'kar."
"For the Jews, there was light and joy, gladness and honor."
(Hebrew courtesy of Chabad's wonderful online source: The Complete Jewish Bible)

Throughout his commentary on Tanach, the Malbim provides definitions for all different types of words:

• Ever wondered about the difference between "sasson" and "simcha"?
• Or the difference between "ohr" and "noga"?
• Or maybe you have a name that has always been defined as "joy" (like Aliza or Rina or Asher) or "light" (like Ora or Hila), and you'd like to know exactly what kind of joy or light it means?

​Take a look at the Purim Dictionary to find out!

​*Purim is an auspicious day for bonding with Hashem and asking for whatever you wish. So don't forget to inundate God with your requests!

Wishing everyone a Purim full of tremendous light and joy!

English translations can only go so far as to the real meaning of the Hebrew word.
 
Because knowing the detailed meaning of the words helps me to better understand what I'm praying or learning about, I ended up collecting a list of words defined by the Malbim.
 
For people with a name derived from one of the following, the Malbim’s descriptions can give you insight into your true essence.
 
And maybe you know the following already, but if you don’t, I hope you’ll find it helpful, too.
 
May we all merit joy and light in all their forms.

Unfortunately, Pollyanna has received a bad rap as a sort of brainless hyper-optimist, even though the actual book makes it clear that she was merely seeking the good in even the worst situation—and according to Torah, it is correct to do so.

However, many people misunderstand the obligation to give the benefit of the doubt, causing harm to themselves and others, and transgressing other serious prohibitions.
 
At one point, I caught myself doing it and noticed many others doing it, so I looked to our Sages for advice.

Doing so clarified what really needed to be done and enabled me to live a more honest, more balanced, and overall better life.

Torah lectures and literature contain countless admonitions and stories illustrating how vitally important—and correct—it is to give the benefit of the doubt.

Unfortunately, doing so in the wrong way leads to a severe transgression of the Torah prohibition of chanifah (among other severe transgressions, such as "standing in the blood of your neighbor" and believing lashon hara and placing "a stumbling block before the blind," and more).

But let's focus on chanifah.

Commonly translated as "flattery," our Sages define chanifah as a form of falsehood. Orchot HaTzaddikim (Ways of the Righteous) and Shaarei Teshuvah (Gates of Repentance) both elaborate on what constitutes chanifah.

Essentially, chanifah is:

• any behavior or speech that implies a forbidden behavior is permitted, or even praiseworthy

• behaving or speaking in a way which implies that an evil or sinning person is perfectly okay, or even righteous, whether only to others or to the sinning person directly

In the field of Narcissism, some forms of chanifah are known as "malignant optimism" and "flying monkeys."

• The Malignant Optimist: This is the ever hopeful victim who always sees the innocent intentions and the good potential in their abuser.

• Flying Monkeys: Named after the winged primates who enthusiastically did the bidding of the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz, "flying monkeys" follow the abuser's bidding, which the abuser uses to increase the torment of his or her targeted victim. "Flying monkeys" may act out of loyalty or misguided "good" intentions or out of fear, not realizing that the abuser will scapegoat them whenever necessary without a second thought or any remorse.

Flying monkeys and malignant optimists are the "nice," well-meaning people who enable the worst atrocities in history as exemplified by the everyday Communists, civilian Nazis, Left-Wing citizens in Western countries and Israel today, and more.

I guess we've all seen very nice and well-intentioned people stubbornly defend and rationalize the actions and intentions of very harmful people—and they tend to pressure others to do the same.

​The rationalizations are always given under the misguided notion that it's obligated by the Torah as the mitzvah of giving the benefit of the doubt and seeing others in a positive light (AKA, an ayin tovah).

​For many decent people, it is hard to accept that some people they know and even like do consistently hurt others and actually mean to.

Such people may even enjoy it.

These types consistently behave badly with bad intentions (even as they often feel totally justified and will indeed offer convincing rationalizations for their harmful behavior. Again. And again. And again.)

​Even their good deeds are usually done for negative reasons.

It is not giving the benefit of the doubt to encourage oneself or others to assume ignorance or lack of intention when there is a pattern of awareness and bad intention.

​(Just to be clear: When this topic refers to bad or abusive people, it does not mean basically decent people who are going through a temporarily hard time (exhausted, stressed, or sick) or who make mistakes or who possess one or two traits that regularly mess them up in certain areas. Bad or abusive people consistently behave harmfully over the long term and even their good behavior tends to be motivated by negative intentions.)

So how can we focus on the good in others and give the benefit of the doubt without becoming malignant optimists or flying monkeys?
 
To start with, we have the timeless example of Rebbi Levi of Berditchev (1740-1809).
 
Rebbi Levi‘s Do’s and Don’ts
Many of us know the story of how Rebbi Levi approached a Jew who was smoking on Shabbat. Rebbi Levi first inquired as to whether the Jew knew it was Shabbat. Perhaps the Jew didn’t realize that smoking was forbidden on Shabbat? Perhaps the Jew had some legitimate reason for smoking on Shabbat?

When the Jew’s answers showed that he certainly knew exactly what he was doing, Rebbi Levi then proclaimed: "Lord of the Universe, see the holiness of your people! They’d rather declare themselves sinners than utter a lie!"

Note what Rebbi Levi did not do:

• He did not express any opinion indicating that it was okay, understandable, funny, or "cute" to be smoking on Shabbat.

 

• He didn’t insist that the Jew was violating Shabbat by accident after the Jew clearly showed that he was violating Shabbat with full knowledge and intent.

 

• He didn’t rationalize that the smoking Jew's possibly "difficult childhood" or "having a bad day" as a justification of the Shabbat violation. (Meaning, Rebbi Levi did not say it's okay or permissible to violate Shabbat because of a mood or certain feelings.)

Instead, Rebbi Levi completely sidelined the Jew’s Shabbat behavior and detoured around to another quality within that same Jew: honesty.

​And Rebbi Levi also paused from interacting directly with the willfully sinning Jew and instead turned to address Hashem.

(Meaning, Rebbi Levi didn’t tell that Jew nor did he say to others, "Well, violating Shabbat isn’t so great, but at least he’s honest about it.")

It is true that the Jew was intentionally violating Shabbat.

It is also true that the Jew refused to lie about it.

There is no, "Yes, but...."

Rebbi Levi did not in any way justify this very public and willful transgression. Instead, he found something else positive to say about his fellow Jew and then re-routed it to Hashem.

He also prayed for people--even the most horrible people.

Of course, this example doesn't totally address the issue of dealing with a very harmful person. Someone can violate Shabbat, yet behave well in other areas.

​And the opposite is also true.

​So this brings us to the Kli Yakar’s discussion of King Achashverosh (a truly bad person) in Parshat Titzaveh 28:39 (which in non-leap years, comes out right before Purim, so the Kli Yakar found the Torah portion's connection to the Purim story).

The Kli Yakar describes Achashverosh as karov l’shogeg—"close to being an unintentional sinner."

This is a radical statement considering how many Sages consider Achashverosh to have been even more evil and more of a Jew-hater than Haman.

Likewise, the Kli Yakar also calls Achashverosh "that rasha"—a wicked person who sins intentionally against both people and God. The Kli Yakar also quotes Megillah 12, in which the angels themselves refer to Achashverosh as "the rasha."
(Just so there's no room for doubt.)

Furthermore, the Kli Yakar explains that Achashverosh even consulted with the Jewish Sages of his time as to the holy symbolism of the Priestly Garments and holy vessels.

And those Sages, in addition to explaining the symbolism, also clearly told him that wearing these garments was absolutely forbidden for anyone other than the Kohen Gadol—the High Priest.
 
Nahafochu—Twist!
Yet the Kli Yakar also explains that the appallingly blasphemous things done by Achashverosh—like wearing the Priestly Garments, holding a feast using the holy vessels from the Beit Hamikdash, and even symbolically acting out parts of the Priestly Service with his servants—were meant by Achashverosh as an atonement for himself!

(See the Kli Yakar on Parshat Titzaveh for the exact atonements rendered by the different garments.)

As the Kli Yakar explains,  

Achashverosh also wanted to avoid the punishment meted out to Belshatzar, who also abused the sanctity of the holy items.

And this explanation demonstrates one of the spectacular things about Judaism and the secret to greatness: the ability to embrace paradox.

Finding a Couple of Diamond Chips Does Not Mean the Mountain of Sludge is a Hidden Diamond Mine
Achashverosh had a couple of good intentions—after all, if he craved atonement (no matter how superficial), he must have had some awareness that he was doing the wrong thing and that there is Din (judgment) and that there is a Dayan (a Judge), whom he wanted to appease.

And so the Kli Yakar, in the same passage where he twice refers to Achashverosh as a rasha, also deems him as "karov l’shogeg—close to being an unintentional sinner"—close, but not quite.

At the end of the day, Achashverosh was still a hopeless rasha.

Even Mordechai HaYehudi, the spiritual giant of that generation who saved Achashverosh’s life, didn’t try to change him.

Furthermore, being married to Queen Esther, a paragon of emuna and everything good, had no effect on the degenerate king.

And yes, Achashverosh also did some other really nice and merciful things, like glorifying Mordechai for saving his life, and not killing Queen Esther for going against serious protocol, and also by sending out an edict that encouraged the Jews to defend themselves against his previous edict, thereby discouraging the Jew-haters from killing Jews.

(Although this wasn't him so much as Hashem orchestrating angels and events behind the scenes.)

Despite these good deeds and despite his desire to preserve the sanctity of the Temple vessels and despite his admittedly superficial desire for personal atonement...

...Achashverosh was still NOT "basically good underneath it all."

Some people aren’t. Really.

But they still have their random good points.

No justifications, no excuses, no rationalizations, no validations, and no white-washing.

Just a couple of good points.

And that’s all we need to acknowledge in such people.