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Intriguing Ways to Help See Things in the Most Authentic & Fascinating Light: Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Va'era

13/1/2021

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In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah for Parshas Vaeira 4 – Seeing His Wonders, the rav takes us in for a much deeper look at the 10 Plagues.

Seeing as so much of our liturgy recalls the Exodus from Egypt—even the blessing after eating bread recalls it—it's vital we understand what went on during that torturous yet miraculous time.​

Intriguing Observations about Bnei Yisrael & Erev Rav

On page 4, Rav Miller makes a shocking observation: 
There are eirev rav who have become greater than us.

​There is no question that we have talmidei chachamim and tzaddikim, famous roshei yeshiva in our history who are descended from them.
He prefaces this by noting that while Am Yisrael today consists of many different races from all the different people who converted to Judaism over the millennia...:
We have among us more Egyptians than we have of any other race.
This seems like unique way of phrasing the old idea from Chazal that at the End of Days, Erev Rav (Mixed Multitude) will outnumber true Jews.

Very interesting, no?

Rav Miller acknowledges that we lack the ability to trace the lineage to see who descended from Egyptians & who descended from the 12 Tribes. But the original Egyptian descendants certainly exist!

Likewise, he notes that many Bnei Yisrael did NOT leave Egypt.

With these 2 observations, he presents an intriguing twist:
​
  • Many Egyptians left Egypt with Bnei Yisrael, primarily BECAUSE of the 10 Plagues, and even sincerely said na'aseh v'nishmah (we will do and we will listen) at Har Sinai.
 
  • At the same time, many Bnei Yisrael did NOT leave Egypt.

So you have non-Jews who converted because of the 10 Plagues, but Jews who did not do teshuvah despite the 10 Plagues.

Whoa.

And, in contrast to common belief, Rav Miller states that the Bnei Yisrael who remained in Egypt were not actually wicked, but only called reshaim (bad) in contrast to those who left.

If those refusers were around today, they'd be our most respected frum Jews.

​So those who did actually leave were quite exceptional.

The Erev Rav Elite

Continuing along this fascinating theme, Rav Miller describes the Erev Rav Egyptians as the crème de la crème of Egyptian society. 

That's right.

The original Erev Rav consisted of the "intellectual aristocracy" of Egyptian nobility.

​Actually, we see this today with the elite of American society. So many marry Jews! Especially the millennial generation. It's weird. Some even seem to convert (though with many of them, their commitment seems lackluster compared to the many sincere converts we've all encountered & according to what basic halacha requires; many don't even go to a real rabbi for "conversion") But I digress...

Is this partly why so many Erev Rav today (as predicted by Chazal) aim for the highest echelons of Jewish society, both politically & religiously? Are they trying to reclaim their former status?

​Anyway, these Erev Rav people gave up lives of luxury & prestige to follow Bnei Yisrael into the Midbar (desert wilderness)...all because of the 10 Plagues' display of Hashem's Mastery.

​The Egyptian intelligentsia discussed every plague with incisive analysis.

So why didn't Paroh (Pharaoh) do the same?

He did, actually. He just came to different conclusions.

The Paroh Paradigm

Basically, says Rav Miller, Paroh responded like the academics today: He theorized that reddish microorganisms infested the Nile.

And Paroh assumed that Moshe Rabbeinu predicted it by analyzing the Nile beforehand.

In other words, Paroh concluded that Moshe Rabbeinu (whom Paroh knew to be very intelligent & educated) examined the Nile beforehand, realized what the red-producing bacteria were about to do, then based on that, told everyone the Nile would turn to blood.

Ta-dah!

​Likewise with the Plague of Frogs. Frogs already existed in the Nile. So what's the big deal about a sudden infestation of them? It can happen. Also, sometimes a hail of frogs occurs from the sky, right?

So with each Plague, that's how Paroh confronted it, which Rav Miller details further on pages 7-8.

​With this, Rav Miller segues into the great contradiction within modern society, which carefully analyzes the great miracles of every human tissue & of nature, yet dismisses all these wonders as happenstance.

And in answer to the question of why Hashem no longer performs Biblical miracles for us today, Rav Miller says: He does!

We simply don't view them as such.

But with our advanced technology (also miraculous, BTW), we can see into so much of the natural workings and truly see Hashem's Hand in it all—just like the Egyptians could see into the Plague of Frogs, etc.

Why Doesn't Hashem Cause a Mass Frog Invasion of Hollywood Studios?

But sure, Rav Miller acknowledges, New York's Hudson River doesn't turn to blood and frogs don't go invading movie theaters & places of ill-repute.

It would be nice if they did, but they don't. (About the frogs, I mean, not the Hudson River.)

Why don't they?

​Because (pages 9-10; emphasis mine):
​​The secret of everything in the world is that it should be a secret!

That’s why Adam Harishon came after creation; the first six days Hakodosh Boruch Hu created all the phenomena by supernatural means.

There were no seeds, and Hashem caused the trees to appear. Grass appeared! Rivers appeared! Frogs appeared!

That’s the teaching of the Torah and you have to get any other pictures of the origin of life out of your head.

Everything came yesh meayin, something out of nothing, and the ‘nothing’ was Hashem's word.

And then, after the six days of Creation, that’s when Adam came.

​When Adam first opened his eyes, he saw a ready-made world.
And that, says Rav Miller (quoting the Mesillat Yesharim/Pathway of the Just) is our purpose in life: to pass this test of emunah by seeing Hashem in a world in which Hashem is hidden.

When we insist on seeing Hashem's Hand in a life seemingly devoid of Hashem, we reap tremendous reward for this.

We create for ourselves huge merits!

It's especially challenging today, so we get especial credit.

Yay us!

​To help us overcome this momentous challenge, Rav Miller delineates on pages 11-14 the Divine aspects of daisies, rosebushes, apple trees, and dandelions.

Also, make sure to check out the Practical Tip on page 15.

And though this dvar Torah didn't come out and say it, the implication here is that the Yisrael majority who stayed behind did not analyze the 10 Plagues properly (according to the principles outlined in this dvar Torah), but the Erev Rav did.

And that made all the difference.

Very chewy food for thought...
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Credit for all quotes & material goes to Toras Avigdor.
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Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Shemot: How to Embody More Scruples than Algae

6/1/2021

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In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah for Parshas Shemos 4 – Ladder of Gratitude, Rav Miller notes that it cannot possibly be that the new Pharaoh literally did not know of Yosef Hatzaddik.

Yosef Hatzaddik performed his duties far above & beyond any expectation, plus Egypt benefitted in every way from Yosef Hatzaddik's leadership.

Instead, this pretending-not-to-know of Yosef Hatzaddik emanated from a deplorable lack of appreciation.

This sealed the eventual doom of Mitzrayim.

​As Rav Miller notes (page 4): 
​“Oooh,” said Hashem, “If you can be a kafui tov, a denier of good that a person bestows on you, then you’re never going to recognize what Hashem does for you. A man who can throw stones at Yosef will surely throw stones at Me. There’ll come a time when the one who said, 'I don’t know Yosef,’ he’ll say, [lo yadaati et Hashem] – I don’t know Hashem either.’ ”

That’s what happened eventually.

​Eventually, when Moshe and Aharon came to Pharaoh, he said, “Who is Hashem? I never heard of Him” (Shemos 5:2).

Your Divine Aspect

Gratitude is the most important aspect of serving Hashem.

Gratitude is what leads to love of Hashem, and also to a healthy fear of Hashem.

Gratitude opens up the heart's conduit for joy to come gushing in; it enables a person to serve Hashem b'simcha.

Our very label "Yehudim" comes from the name of Leah & Yaakov's son, Yehudah.

It carries within it the root hoda'ah—gratitude, thanks.

​It's a defining quality for us, whether we realize it or not.

On pages 4-6, Rav Miller appealingly details the gratitude we should feel for parents & apples.

He acknowledges that it's much easier to feel gratitude toward people than to Hashem because we see more clearly people & the direct results of their actions.

On page 7, Rav Miller recalls the verse from Beresheit in which Hashem breathed into Adam's nostrils.

Seeing as Adam is the spiritual & biological root of every human being who has ever & will ever live, we must realize this means that Hashem breathed something of Himself into each & everyone of us:
The Creator breathed into a man’s nostrils the spirit of life (Bereishis 2:7).

​Now, that sentence is so important that we should talk for forty years on that one subject; I’m not exaggerating!

Because who breathed into Man's nostrils Hashem? And...if somebody breathes, he breathes from himself.

​So it means Hashem breathed into Mankind something of Himself – there is in Mankind something of Hashem.
Why is this idea so important?

It means that every single human being—Jewish or not Jewish, physically disabled or Olympic gold medalist, mentally disabled or screaming genius, slave or king, white or black or yellow or red or blue, billionaire or impoverished--EVERY single human being possesses something Godly within himself or herself.​

"Why Should We Have Any More Scruples Than Algae?"

We all sense Divine aspect, explains Rav Miller. But this sense of having received something Divine gets corrupted when we allow our minds to become corrupted.

For example, with the exception of truly humble people, most human beings expect gratitude.

We expect appreciation for our efforts—even when our efforts result in foolishness or destruction.

Rav Miller offers the example of how Communists expect you to appreciate any benefit they bestow on you.

They take away all your rights, torture & kill people, lower the standard of living & quality of life...but expect you to grovel to them for offering you free healthcare.

They will break your bones & slaughter you, they will steal everything you've put heart & soul into, they will force you to live a lower-class lifestyle (while they enjoy a life of wealth)...but as long as you aren't a threat to their power & luxury, you can have free visits to the doctor & free operations.

And you darned well better be grateful for it, you insignificant pawn!

Atheists feel same way, of course.

Here's Rav Miller again, explaining it as only he can (page 7):
Let’s say a college professor; he believes that a man is descended from algae.

Now the algae doesn’t have any qualms about ingratitude.

And yet this college professor is outraged, he has an instinctive indignation at people who don’t appreciate what he does for them.

Now if you would question him, “Why should we have any more scruples than algae? After all according to your own teachings we are merely the result of accidents and development, and therefore all these things – gratitude, honesty, decency – are merely figments of imagination according to you; they’re imaginary social structures. So why should we be obligated?”

But despite all the theories, although he doesn’t believe in anything, the professor is still influenced by his non-evolutionist mother.

He still believes in the innate decency of gratitude because he can’t escape the inherent traits of character in every man’s soul.

​And that includes the basic decency of feeling thankful and indebted to anyone who does even the smallest favor to you.

"When a man is deficient in his conduct towards his fellowman,
we know that he’s deficient in his conduct with Hashem."

–Rav Avigdor Miller (page 8)

This, explains Rav Miller, is the actual meaning of "Derech eretz—proper behavior—comes before Torah."

Derech eretz, he says, means the correct qualities of character.

And correct qualities of character derive from gratitude & appreciation.

BTW, from personal experience...every time you see a person who seems very frum & knowledgeable, but displays bad middot on a regular basis, you can trace it back to lack of gratitude toward Hashem.

Again, emphasis on REGULAR basis. No one is perfect, and it could also be that you're misjudging someone who is genuinely behaving well but seems like not.

​But if someone regularly displays bad middot, you can trace it back to lack of appreciation.

​Boy, could I tell you stories of examples about this!

But I won't this time. 😉

Praise Your Real BFF

On pages 11-15, Rav Miller discusses how our speech expresses where we're holding with regard to our appreciation of all Hashem does for us, and also how this applies to different aspects of life.

Rav Miller reminds us that Hashem is our Best Friend.

It doesn't always feel like it, but in our soul, we know that Hashem is our true BFF.

​(And make sure to check out the practical tip on page 15!)
And thank You very much to Hashem for creating Toras Avigdor, which enables copious & easy access to the wisdom of Rav Avigdor Miller ztz"l. All credit for quotes & material goes to Toras Avigdor.
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Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayechi: How to be Perfectly Peculiar—And Why You Really SHOULD be Perfectly Peculiar

31/12/2020

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In this week's dvar Torah by Rav Avigdor Miller, Parshat Vayechi: Personalities & Growth, he discusses how on Yaakov Avinu's deathbed, Yaakov Avinu notes how different each of his numerous sons are from one another.

Then Rav Miller cites Gemara Pesachim 56a, which mentions a man who went around saying, "I want to live along the coast."

He loved the seashore so much, he dreamed of building a home by the sea when he retired.

When they looked into why he loved the sea so much, they discovered this man descended from Zevulun, which was the sea-faring Tribe. Hashem ingrained within Bnei Zevulun a love for the ocean.

Another man went around saying, "Donu dini – Judge my case."

Whenever there was a disagreement between this man and another, he wasn't interested in arbitration or compromise; he wanted the crystalline verdict: Who's right? Who's wrong? And what must be done now?

He said "Donu dini" so often that they checked into his lineage and discovered what you probably already guessed: "Donu dini" descended from the Tribe of Dan.

Rav Miller explains about the inner make-up of Bnei Dan (pg. 5):
It’s a family that doesn’t believe in leeway, in bargaining and arbitration.

Shevet Dan was rigid; others might be more flexible, they’re not such sticklers for din, but the family of Dan liked that everything should be according to the strict letter of justice. It was a characteristic of the entire family.

That’s why there are people like that today too; they don’t like to deviate at all.

Even little children sometimes are born that way; it’s their nature to follow rules. It used to be in Europe, in Yiddish, we used to call a child like that a “zakonik.”

Zakon in Russian means law; a zakonik is a child who likes the law.

If you tell him once to close the door when he walks out, he’ll always remember that.

I remember I once saw a child like that. You told him once when he was a little baby of three years old, “Don’t forget to close the door,” and after that he never forgot.

​It was in his nature. 
I always love hearing about this different personalities characteristics of Tribes.

I even crave it.

I think it's because it's proof that different natures really are ordained by Hashem, so it follows that even if your society disapproves, Hashem Himself approves.

Meaning, Hashem Himself WANTS us to be this way or that way—used for the good, of course.

I think this helps access Divine Love. Hashem really does like YOU.

We are Not the Religion of Cloning

​Every society idealizes certain personalities while disapproving of other personalities.

But that's all wrong.

It's what you DO with your personality that matters.

Every trait can be used for the good or the bad.

Allowing your child to be him or herself became a big issue in chinuch—and rightly so.

But what initially broke me (and I still remain dismayed by this) is how the chinuch people tend to expect mothers to be clones. 

NOT all of them expect this. Definitely not all of them. There are chinuch people with genuine wisdom & insight.

But what I initially encountered made me feel like there's only one right way to be a mother.

And that one way always happened to be exactly the same way as the chinuch rebbetzin herself.

(It's obvious that was never intentional, but simply how they naturally felt.)

But that's 100% NOT true.

​There is not only one way.

That's a recipe for disaster.

It's All Cramped & Dark Stuffed Inside the Mommy-Mold

​For example, people have different sleep needs.

I have a friend who absolutely NEEDS 9 hours of sleep.

Even if she sleeps 8 hours at night, she still craves a short nap during the day.

So she needs to work around the need in life and sleep always remained one of her top priorities—even more than food.

And that's fine. That's her physiology. How on earth could she possibly change it?

She can't.

Others are energetic to the point they're bouncing off the walls, while others find it hard to get off the couch—and then there's everyone between those 2 extremes.

And that's just the basic unchangeable physiology of a human being.

Another example:

A wife with a competent, helpful husband experiences a different life with different resources than a wife with an unhelpful, demanding husband.

Also, the children's personalities define the home.

I know people insist that the mother decides the atmosphere of the home, but you can't compare a home of naturally hyper children to a home of naturally calm ones. 

(I wrote more about that HERE.)

It's really the children who define the atmosphere of the home.

And because, no matter how hard I tried, I could never wedge myself deep enough into their mommy-mold, I mostly gave up listening to or reading chinuch lectures & books—with a few exceptions, of course.

Thank God for the exceptions!

And I more or less went the way Rav Shalom Arush writes in Garden of Education.

​And I've been winging it ever since!

Anyway...

I think that reading about the different qualities of the Tribes offers a lot of comfort & chizuk (encouragement).

Not only is it okay to be different—even extremely different—from each other, but it is even DESIRABLE.

We literally & spiritually NEED to be different from each other!

​That's exactly how Hashem set things up in the first place.​

​Here's Rav Miller again on page 6 (emphasis mine):
If I happen to think one way, it may be something that you cannot change in me; it may be built in into my nature.

​Just as Zevulun loved the sea, and Dan loved clear-cut din – it wasn’t something you could change; it was inherited; it was in his blood and it would be transmitted forever to all of his seed.

Clone-Enforcement is Rebellion against Hashem

Pages 8-12 are essential (and fun) reading.

Rav Miller describes different Gedolim (both men & women) in Jewish history who contributed what they did by virtue of their personality—contributions others could not have made.

​As Rav Miller states (pages 7-8; boldface & underline mine):
It’s not an accident; that’s what Hakodosh Boruch Hu wants, that each one will use his own particular talents, his own characteristics in his service of Hashem.

Hakodosh Boruch Hu has planned these differences from the beginning and He’s waiting to see, “Will this person utilize his stay in this world to bring forth by means of his own personality and his unique capabilities the greatness that he’s capable of?”
Think about that for a moment.

This idea means that if we force someone to stuff his or her own personality into a box and serve Hashem like someone of the opposite personality, then we are going against Hashem's Will.

In that case, we are harming the Jewish people.

Hashem WANTS the unique service of this personality & that personality.

​Who are we to deny Him?

​Who are we to think we know better than the Creator of the Universe?

Take a Walk on the Peculiar Side

Rav Miller, page 14 (boldface & underline mine):
It means that this world is your place for achieving greatness by means of your peculiarities.

The Rambam says that every person is capable of becoming as great as Moshe Rabbeinu! Not by being Moshe Rabeinu. Not by being Rashi or Sarah Schenirer or the Baal Shem Tov.

By being yourself!
Throughout the dvar Torah, Rav Miller repeatedly uses the word "peculiarities" to describe our unique differences.

That's not a mistake or because he couldn't find a better word.

We often fear being thought strange, weird, odd, or peculiar.

But here, we see that Rav Miller wants us to take davka what's strange, weird, odd, or peculiar and USE it in Hashem's Service.

When channeled correctly, peculiar is perfectly praiseworthy!

And don't forget the Practical Tip on page 17...

Credit for all quotes & material goes to the uniquely wonderful Toras Avigdor.
Related posts:
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  • God's Sunlit Garden
  • Why a Leah Imeinu Can't (and Shouldn't) be a Sara Imeinu
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Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayigash: The Secret Strategy to Overcoming Our Most Powerful Enemies

24/12/2020

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The Rise & Fall of Vanity

It's always interesting to note the rise & fall of nations throughout history.

For example, Biblical Egypt rose to such heights of power, technology, science, and occult...yet where is it now?

Greek Egypt also showed great accomplishment & promise...yet where is it now?

Original Egyptians no longer exist as identifiable members of that nation.

Today, the very name "Egypt" no longer connotates the pinnacle of human accomplishment or a world power, but a dreary dysfunctional Third World country that occasionally lashes out like a dying, wounded sphinx.

Once again, history shows that the best plan is to disengage from the temporal (regardless of how compelling & impressive) and associate with the Eternal: Hashem.​

Harnessing Those Horses

In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah on Parshas Vayigash 4 – The Result of a Good Deed, he hones in on Yosef Hatzaddik's burning to desire to honor his father to the point that Yosef Hatzaddik forgets about his own honor as one of the most powerful leaders in the world.

​Yosef Hatzaddik rushed to the stables to harness his horses himself, even though the servants stood by, trained & ready to do it for him—yet he did so all for the sake of honoring his father.

In contrast, Paroh (Pharoah) also rushed to the stables to harness his horses himself—but to pursue Am Yisrael to death & re-enslavement.

Rav Miller notes that when such similar statements occur, Hashem means to draw our attention to it.

Millennia of Torah scholars scrutinize every word of Torah. And they note the connection.

​What is it?

The Secret to Fighting the Most Powerful Enemy

Yosef Hatzaddik's great thirst to do a mitzvah, to forget about his ego & his status for the sake of the honor of both Hashem & his father—this paralleled Paroh's evil thirst to re-enslave Am Yisrael.

With the same act, Yosef Hatzaddik sought to serve Hashem with single-minded focus while Paroh sought to rebel against Hashem with single-minded focus.

But because Yosef Hatzaddik behaved this way first, he received the power & the credit for the act.

​On pages 10-13, Rav Miller explains in compelling detail the Kuzari's description of how creating a mitzvah is like creating a child.

As we learn from a verse in an earlier about Noach's descendants: A person's true offspring are his mitzvot.

​As Rav Miller notes (page 14):
​And so when we were standing at the Red Sea, by all accounts we should have been finished off.

We were a weak people, without weapons and not schooled in the ways of war.

And here is the most powerful army in the world hurtling towards us, at full speed.

The Egyptians were wild with enthusiasm.

​Pharaoh was so drunk with bloodlust that he had harnessed his chariot himself!

At this point an angel spoke up: Wasn’t Yosef also a leader of Egypt? Didn’t he also get so enthusiastic about Your will Hashem, that he did the same thing and harnessed his own chariot?

​“Oh,” Hashem said, “Yes, yes; now is the time to strike down the actions of Pharaoh. His efforts to destroy My people will have no effect, because Yosef’s act outweighs all of that military might.”

Applying the Lesson of Yosef HaTzaddik to Ourselves

As usual, Rav Miller emphasizes the importance of simcha shel mitzvah, of carrying out our obligations with enthusiasm & relish.

On pages 16-21, Rav Miller goes through different mitzvot & explains in witty detail how to accomplish them with increased enthusiasm.

​For example (page 18):
So here's a lady...And now she’s lighting the candles.

She’s lighting anyhow so just before she lights the candles she remembers she once heard this idea so she stops for a few seconds and tries to create a simcha shel mitzvah, that she should be happy, excited about the mitzvah of bringing in the Shabbos.

It’s a wonderful idea. You should try it.
With this in mind, please also make sure to check out the Practical Tip on page 21, which shows how you can apply this idea with literally only 10 seconds each day.
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Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Miketz: How Hashem Orchestrates All Sorts of Crazy & Unpleasant Things to Happen in order to Attain Certain Goals

17/12/2020

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It's difficult to discuss one of the main points of Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah for Parshas Mikeitz 4 – Hashem Guides History because it's woven throughout the booklet, especially for the first 11 pages until Part III.

​So it's definitely worth reading in full.

And the main point is how all sorts of unpleasant & crazy things had to happen in order to make the ultimate goal happen.

For example, says Rav Miller on page 7, if Esav never chased after Yaakov Avinu, then Yaakov never would've fled to Lavan. 

And if Yaakov never ended up with Lavan, then Yitzchak Avinu would've contacted Lavan to send him a wife for Yaakov (as Avraham Avinu did for Yitzchak Avinu), and Lavan would've sent him Leah, and he would've married Leah, and that would've been it.

Rachel Imeinu, Bilha, and Zilpah would've never entered the picture.

The coat-of-many-colors fiasco would never have happened.

And so on.

​And that's the big life-lesson for us.

So many heart-breaking dynamics occur.

So many people endure so many disappointments & devastating events.

Yaakov Avinu, for example, only ever wanted Rachel Imeinu, but instead he ended up with 4 wives. (Remember, Lavan pushed Leah on him, then Leah & Rachel gave him Bilha & Zilpah—he never asked for anyone except Rachel.)

Then Rachel died first, after only giving him 2 sons.

Then there was less than perfect harmony among his children.

And then Yaakov disappeared, an inconsolable loss.

And so on.

Nothing occurred the way Yaakov Avinu intended.

​But wherever we are now and whether we feel satisfied or disappointed with our lives, we must remember that Hashem wove many links in the chain to get us to where we are now.

Rav Miller calls them "vuvs" because that's the Hebrew letter which means "and."

"And this happened...and then this happened...AND, gosh, this other thing happened too..."

​He explains on page 12:
Every man and woman in this world – no matter who you are – must understand that there were hundreds, thousands, of vuvs in your life that brought you to where you are.

If you start looking into the histories of even the gedolim up till today – you think the gedolim were all born into families where the mothers wore long beards? 

You would be surprised where they came from!

​There were many vuvs that brought them to where they are today.
This really speaks to me because I struggle with this idea so much.

Especially the stuff I felt very idealistic about & went to excruciating lengths to fulfill these ideals...only to have both the chair kicked out from under me AND the carpet whisked out from under my feet, leaving me slammed down onto a hard floor.

Not pretty.

But still meant to be, for whatever reason.

Yet it's so true that to keep your eye on the ball, you must live with the truth that Hashem orchestrates everything.

This idea also prevents toxic shame from devouring you.

Take responsibility? Yes!

Do teshuvah? Yes!

Blame & torture yourself for every single mistake & bad middah you ever acted on?

NO.

It's a bit of a paradox, but Hashem is behind everything. So while we need to work on ourselves & take responsibility for our behavior, we don't need to hate, loathe, and despise ourselves either.

Likewise, we also don't need to be too proud of ourselves.

Sure, we can take pleasure in our accomplishments.

But pride leads us down a deceptively icky road.

So if you are thin, beautiful, wealthy, happily married, healthy, and successful, you can be very happy about that. Yay!

But to feel that you are innately better & smarter than the rest of the world?

No.

Even if it all happened because you made so many good decisions, it was Hashem Who gave you that good decision-making seichel and it was Hashem who allowed those decisions to work out well.

For example, don't we all know people who married well and lived truly happy lives—and then their spouse died young? Or developed an unexpected debilitating physical or mental illness?

See, they did everything right—but it still didn't end up so happily.

That's just one example.

So there's no place for neither self-glorification nor self-recrimination.

It's really about connecting to Hashem & what HE wants for us.

That is admittedly much harder than it sounds.

Take 2 Minutes

Here's how to get started with doing it anyway (pages 12-13): 
The truth is right now you should look back on your lives and see what happened to you.

Hakodosh Boruch Hu did things in your past, only that you don’t study it.

Did you ever take even five minutes to look back on your life and see how Hakodosh Boruch Hu connected the events in your life and brought you to where you are now?

You’re fifty years old now – did you give even five minutes, even two minutes, for fifty years?!

If you did you would see the yad Hashem in complicated ways.

Look at All Those Initially Unexplainable Links in the Chain!

And here, Rav Miller gets personal about his own vuvim—lots of stuff I never knew! (page 13):
I’ll tell you a little story about myself.

I was thrown out of the Hebrew school — when I was a little boy I was sent to the Hebrew school, the old time Talmud Torah, and something happened that I was thrown out.

​All the other boys in the Hebrew school were good boys; they weren’t thrown out and all of them graduated at bar mitzvah and they succeeded in becoming nothings.

Nothing came of them.

But because I had some trouble, I was thrown out and I had to look for another place.
 
I found a private Rebbi who wanted to teach me and he made a mentch out of me.

And finally he sent me to a real yeshiva.

I look back now and I understand that it was a vuv in my life — it was the hand of Hashem that was sending me on to a career of Torah.

Job Seeking

But to study one vuv is only scratching the surface of your life.

When I was fourteen I wanted to apply for a job in a factory.

There was very little money at home and I thought I’d help.

So when I saw an ad, “Boys Wanted,” I went downtown to the factory to take a job. And as I turned the corner I saw the man come out of the factory, take the “Help Wanted” sign off the door and take it inside.

​He had hired his last boy just before I came!

I wouldn’t be sitting here tonight if I had gained that job.

When I was twenty-one, I thought, “I'm not a public speaker. I'm a bashful boy; I'm not the type to talk to people in public. I won't be able to get a rabbanus. What should I do?”

I decided I'll try to become a public school teacher. An einfal! I’ll teach in the public school.

So I went to the Board of Education and I applied.

The man sitting at the desk said, “What are you doing now?”

​I said, “I'm a rabbinical student.”

He said “Go back to your business; go back.”

A goy told me to go back. I listened to him. A malach min hashamayim [an angel from Heaven].
What, Rav Miller was kicked out of school?

And the only one kicked out?

And he held the uncompromising view of himself as "not a public speaker"?

"I'm not the type to talk to people in public"—SERIOUSLY? That's what he became famous for! His cassettes!

Look at all that.

​On page 14, he describes how he lost a potential job to a far less qualified candidate.

How many of us have complained of the exact same situation?

That kind of thing happens a lot.

But, as Rav Miller explains there, it enabled him to go to Slabodka, where he learned how to become great.

​On page 14, Rav Miller also directs the lesson toward each of us—something most of us, who've made (or are in the middle of making) big transformations in life—can relate to:
The fact that you’re here tonight instead of being someplace else is due to certain reasons.

​What's the reason? Things happen in your lives.

Don’t just say, “Boruch Hashem it worked out,” and pattur [exempt] yourself. Oh no! You have to look back step by step and study.

Why aren’t you in Greenwich village right now? Why aren’t you in a basement somewhere in India smoking hashish? 

And the answer is that Hakadosh Baruch Hu guided your footsteps.

You’ll find some little quirk in the history of your life that saved you. And then another one and another one.

It’s all from Hashem!
And even if life isn't so great (maybe some are even thinking, "A basement of chashish in India? Sounds better than what I've got now!"), it's the Olam Haba that matters.

You can enjoy a life deemed successful by your society, but end up in a dreary Olam Haba.

And you can lead a very disappointing & frustrating existence here, but end up in a Paradise later.

So if you're reading Rav Miller's words, you're someone who's at least interested in all the right things.

Remember: Most people—most Jews—are not reading Rav Miller's words. They never heard of him and aren't interesting in anything he has to say anyway.

So if you're perusing his dvar Torah or any dvar Torah in preparation for Shabbat, that's really good. 

And how did you get to that?

After all, it didn't have to happen.

​Even if you're FFB, it didn't have to happen that you care enough to do it.

Final Words

Please don't forgot to check out the Practical Tip on page 15.

And also, the intriguing Q&A about how Yaakov Avinu benefitted from losing Yosef Hatzaddik for so many years on page 15.

Also, if you own Rav Shlomo Almoli's book Dream Interpretation from Classical Jewish Sources, it contains a translation in Appendix II of Rav Yehudah Petiyah's material relating to Parshat Miketz from Minchat Yehudah.
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Rav Avigdor Miller on the Real Story (and the Real Lesson) of Chanukah

14/12/2020

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Essential reading, not just for Chanukah, but for general hashkafah is Rav Avigdor Miller's Hyrcanus's Downfall.

The lessons within especially apply to our times.

While it's easy to laugh your way through the initial Q&A at the beginning (I laughed out loud at least 3 times—and this was the 4th time I've read it), several profound lessons lie beneath the witty exchange.

One that originally struck me & permanently changed my perception was this:
Rav Miller: I’m not a gadol, very far from it.

Questioner: Well, I’m very much impressed with your –

Rav Miller: I’m not a gadol

Questioner: Well, I’m very impressed with your delivery –

Rav Miller: A gadol doesn’t have any good delivery. A gadol stammers when he talks. A man who has good delivery is not a gadol. He’s a public speaker.

Questioner: Well, I think you understand the subject matter, I think you have some element of gedulah.
​
Rav Miller: I’m a speaker. A gadol can’t speak. A gadol can think!
For some reason, this idea sliced deep into my heart & changed the way I saw rabbanim.

I found myself feeling increasing respect for the rabbanim who don't speak so impressively. Some do stammer or simply aren't able to speak clearly for whatever the reason.

Some twitch or tic or speak staccato-style.

Some possess a more monotone & unanimated delivery, but their organization & content are sublime.

Some come off as sweet, rather than serious & scholarly.

Or they discuss Torah concepts in such an animated & blissful way, it almost seems childlike. (Some mekubalim possess this kind of sweet, innocent, and joyful persona due to their innate holiness & trust in Hashem.)

Recently, I heard a rav with such a sweet & gentle voice & persona, it struck me as effeminate—even though he clearly isn't effeminate.

And I see how correct Rav Miller was in emphasizing this—a true gadol tends to lack the impressive externals.

If you think about it, it's a big challenge to focus both on what you're saying AND also whether your tone of voice, facial & body language, and rhythm are equally up to par.

​So most won't be really groovy speakers.

This isn't always true, of course. Rav Miller showed himself a universally compelling speaker in both Yiddish & English.

Likewise, the Lubavitcher Rebbe appealed to a universal audience with his captivating delivery, his powerful conduction of farbrengens, and his compelling way of relating to each individual with heartfelt concern.

Rav Yisrael Meir Shapiro of Lublin (of Daf Yomi renown), plus the Ben Ish Chai, were known for their oratorical skill.

But in general, one should look for the non-stunners when seeking out true spiritual greatness.

What We Learn from the Real Story of Chanukah & the Fall of Hyrcanus

The second part of the article (THE IDENTITY OF THE ENEMY) should be required reading for every Jew.

It contains the real tragedy & battle of Chanukah—a battle we're still fighting today.

​The real enemy is within, not without; there's a fifth column.

And yes, that fifth column sometimes looks assimilated with obvious hostility toward Torah Judaism...but not always.

Sometimes that fifth column doesn't mean to betray Judaism. It looks religious & committed, and even perceives itself as religious & committed...

​...but it crosses a line at some point—a line that starts in its mind.

The big miracle is how we're still around after repeated self-inflicted onslaughts!

(And yeah, the surrounding culture & rulers caused & still cause a lot of harm, but even that starts with the fifth column from within.)

As noted above, this is something like my 4th time reading Hyrcanus's Downfall. 

But for some reason, I found the story downright chilling this time. I don't why it affected me that way now & not before.

Anyway, the article is definitely food for thought—and mussar to be internalized.
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You as the Hero in the Historic World Movie of the Future

10/12/2020

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For this post, it's best to have familiarity with these past 3 posts:
  • Smile—You're on Heaven's Candid Camera: Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayeishev (taken from HERE)
  • How the Baby Steps in This World Create Your Future World of Beautiful Pulsating Light (Rav Eliyahu Dessler)
  • The #1 Thing to Keep Doing When You Find Yourself Sinking in Mud (Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender)
Let's start with Rav Avigdor Miller's allegory of the historic movie of humanity & applying it to other guidance he gave, such as thinking about Hashem while walking from one utility pole to the next as you hurry down the street or while you hang on to a subway strap.

We know this matters because Rav Dessler wrote in Strive for Truth that any teshuvah you initiate in this world provides you with eternal progression in the World to Come.

Any teshuvah you do here starts off a marvelous chain reaction that continues with you for eternity.

And this is a big reason why people like Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender, Rav Itamar Schwartz, and Rav Avigdor Miller encourage people with baby-steps.

Lo alecha hamalacha ligmor—You are not obligated to finish the work.

But you must still work it!

Even 10 seconds of it—the time it takes to walk from one utility pole to the next.

You as the Star of the Most Terrifying Zombie Movie

So based on these ideas, this means that when all of humanity watches the movie of the history of humanity, we're going to see thousands of years of billions of people going about their lives like zombies and thinking vanities.

Empty-headed thoughts.

Frivolous thoughts.

​Unwholesome thoughts.

Thoughts of avodah zarah, like other religions or meditations.

Evil thoughts, scheming plans to destroy other people.

It's like those awful horror movies in which everyone is walking around crazed or zombified.

And then the scene switches...to you.

You in a Tear-Jerking Scene of the Historic Movie

There you are, walking down any old street, and as you pass one utility pole, you say to yourself, "Now I want to maintain an awareness of Hashem."

And you think about Hashem for the time it takes you to walk to the next utility pole.

And tears stream down the faces of everyone in the audience.

"That was such a beautiful scene!" they sob.

Likewise, when you say, "Now I am upholding the mitzvah of loving Hashem—I love You, Hashem."

Everyone's in floods as they watch your heart-stirring scene.

A hero against a billion mindless yet destructive zombies!

We don't feel it now.

​But we will.

You as a Thrilling Climax of the Historic Movie

Then there's another scene: It's you again!

But this time, you're holding your tongue.

Maybe you wanted to reveal a particularly juicy bit of lashon hara. Maybe you wanted to indulge in some particularly gratifying ona'at devarim.

​Maybe you were just insulted and you want desperately to snarl back, but you remember how, in Hashem's Eyes, it's better to be from the insulted rather than the insulters, and you want the blessing the comes from being silent.

Maybe you wanted to criticize or explode.

Doesn't matter. They're all excellent reasons to hold your tongue.

So there you are, with your lips pressed together. Maybe your mouth is twitching and you have a pained or angry look on your face, but your lips remain pressed together.

And maybe you feel good about your restraint...or maybe you don't.

If you haven't grown up with this ideal or if you aren't at all used to such self-restraint, you might feel awkward, stupid, frustrated, insecure, or resentful.

But now the audience is going wild with cheering.

Why?

Because again, they see you against the backdrop of billions of people over thousands of years—people who said whatever they wanted regardless of the consequences for anyone else. And also the billions of people who tweeted nastiness, who abused the comment sections of Facebook & websites, and who left soul-destroying messages on WhatsApp & Instagram. (3.6 billion people are on social media right now.)

Yet here you are, with your mouth closed against all odds!

It's like when that little one-man battleship needed to fly deep into the massive planet-destroying Death Star to destroy it.

He succeeds; it blows up in a planet-sized explosion.

But no one knows if that pilot managed to get out in time...

They think he's dead.

And then...he appears! 

He made it!

He destroyed the Death Star, saved the Universe—and made it out alive!

What a wild finale!

So that's how everyone feels when they're going to see you with your painfully closed mouth.

Likewise, as you flail in the mud at today's 50th level of tumah, hopping from one foot to the other, struggling to free yourself from the mud, but you manage to do no more than get one foot out when the other foot gets sucked back in again.

You feel frustrated, despairing, exhausted, and gunky.

To make things worse, others deride your efforts.

Most of the world does not understand why you don't simply lie down in the mud and relax by streaming in some trashy brainwashing Hollywood films while snacking on non-kosher hot dogs & making nasty or inane remarks on social media.

​Yet you're relying on Rav Bender's exhortation in Words of Faith:

"One foot in, one foot out.
​But the main thing is that the last foot should be outside."

And now, at the time of this future screening, everyone knows of this all-important goal.

And your final scene ends...with one foot out of the mud.

The audience goes wild—YOU DID IT!

YES!

It's a million times more thrilling & meaningful than the special effects of the pilot making it out of the Death Star alive.

And that's the truth.

Only we don't feel it now.

​But we will.
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Smile—You're on Heaven's Candid Camera!: Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayeshev

9/12/2020

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In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah for Parshas Vayeishev 4 – Writing the Eternal Story, Rav Miller offers a compelling description on pages 3-5 of the results of if Reuven had known that the episode of the brothers & Yosef at the pit would have made it into the Torah.

​On pages 6-8, Rav Miller notes an idea he said before, and that's that everything we do is being recorded and will appear later.

​There's an idea of a Torah that will be written by Eliyahu Hanavi, and our deeds will have a place there. And no, it doesn't contradict the idea of not adding or subtracting to the Chumash now. 

It's a deliciously complex idea, so it's best to read it in the rav's own words (again, pages 6-8).

​On pages 8-9, Rav Miller details a scientific project I never heard of: to collect all the dissipated sound that has ever existed and bring it back together.

"...we would be able to hear today what was said thousands of years ago," he says.

A very intriguing idea, indeed.

He mentions the heart-aching fact that tremendous Torah existed in the not-so-distant past, but no way to record it.

The rav emphasized that the rabbanim of the pre-WWII Slabodka yeshivah gave such well-formed shiurim, an entire lecture flowed forth like gold from their lips—but no one ever recorded them.

Such a loss!

But here, Rav Miller reassures us we'll be able to hear them again—and much more than that!

For example:

  • How many of us yearn to hear the sound of Sara Imeinu's voice and know exactly what she said to the women she converted, and how she said it?
 
  • Don't we wish so much to hear a shiur by Rebbi Akiva or a nevuah from any of the Nevi'im?
 
  • And wouldn't we love to hear how David Hamelech sang his own Tehillim?
 
  • Or the heart-soaring music of the Levi'im in the Beit Hamikdash?

So much beautiful sound missing!

​Yet we certainly will hear it again.

Stuff that Makes You Think

From page 9, Rav Miller elaborates on one of the more cringe-inducing ideas in Judaism: Our deeds will be revealed at some point.

ALL our deeds.

​Like this (page 11, emphasis mine):
And I must tell you that all this is very big fun!

That’s part of the great simcha of Olam Habo.

It’s a remarkable happiness to study and analyze the events of human history with all the secrets revealed and thoroughly understood.

But it’s only a happiness for the spectators – it’s not always a time of joy for those who were the actors.

Because when Reuven – Reuven is there, he’s among the audience – when finally the picture of Reuven is flashed on the screen, he’s not so happy with himself.

Everybody, all the tzaddikim, Nevi’im, Tana’im, Amora’im, the Rishonim and Achronim, and everyone who came after them, are sitting and studying the story of Yosef being saved:

And Reuven said to them, “Don’t shed his blood. Let’s throw him into a pit instead,” and when Reuven hears those words he puts his head into his hands and he thinks to himself:

“Ach! What poor words these are! Couldn’t I have written into the scenario something more noble than that? Why didn’t I realize when I had the opportunity what was really taking place? I wish I could have another chance!”

But there are no take-twos in the next world.

​What’s written down has been recorded forever and it’s going to play in Olam Habo forever.
On pages 11-13, Rav Miller discusses the incident of David Hamelech with Batsheva, and with his usual forthrightness & wit, he expresses the feelings many of us have about it.

​From page 13 onward, Rav Miller fleshes out what exactly the idea of being recorded means for us and offers practical examples of how to use this idea for self-improvement.

One very big plus about this is it takes a person's natural desire for kavod and shows him or her how to use it in a holy way.

Especially with all the rampant narcissism in our times, a narcissist could take this idea alone & make a lot of soul-progress.

Don't forget to check out the Practical Tip on page 18.

There is also a compelling remembrance of a very special Jew named Tuvia Baruch Chester by his daughter on page 19.

And...you can find Rav Miller's personal thoughts on Chanukah gifts on the last page. It's geared toward Jews who live among all the December activity of the Western world, but still worth reading no matter where you live.
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How to Live a Life in which Money Really is Time: Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayishlach

3/12/2020

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In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah, Parshas Vayishlach 4 – Time and Money, he addresses an issue that makes many people go: "Huh?"

Why on earth did Yaakov Avinu go back for the cheap pottery?

Yes, we know the classic explanation, that tzaddikim value their possessions because of their holy sense of gratitude & appreciation.

But WHY?

​How does that work?

To Whom Do Your Belongings Belong?

The first thing to understand is Yaakov Avinu did not view his possessions as his.

He viewed them as belonging to Hashem.

And just like most of us tend to be more careful with the money or possessions of others (like how you keep a borrowed book on a high shelf and refuse to eat over it, yet your own books can be found on the kitchen table when you're not eating over the book), Yaakov cared for his possessions because he saw them as Hashem's possessions.

​Likewise, Rav Miller makes an excellent point about how we can improve our behavior by viewing our money as belonging to Hashem.

For example, even though you can produce a beautiful wedding for $20,000 (BTW, my Israeli wedding over 20 years ago was $2000, but I wish we'd added another $1000 for a larger hall; it would've been worth it), some people like to splurge on a $50,000 wedding.

But if you look at money as belonging to Hashem, you tend to behave more responsibly.

Happy Story #1
I once knew a wealthy frum family who could easily afford eye-popping luxury weddings, but intentionally made mainstream weddings because they wanted people who couldn't afford extravagance to feel comfortable with making a normal wedding.

In this way, they contributed restraint against the rising wave of upstaging events.

Only a spiritual person, a person who really feels for their fellows, could think that way.

Sad Story
​Another time, I met a young woman embittered by her father's attitude toward spending when it came time for her to marry.

He splurged on a fancy wedding to impress his friends, leaving very little to start his daughter on her married life.

"I didn't even WANT such a fancy wedding!" she fumed. "I, the kallah, did NOT feel I needed all that extravagance to make me happy! He only did it for himself!"

So she found herself with a rapidly growing family & living in an apartment with a claustrophobic living room, 2 tiny bedrooms, and a small porch—plus cheap furniture & appliances.

She lived every day with the frustration of not having the space or quality she needed, her resentment renewed daily because every inconvenience & discomfort reminded her of how she could have a more manageable domestic life, but her father did not care enough about her to give her that (even though he could have afforded it had he made her a normal wedding rather than an impressive one). 

Happy Story #2
Rebbetzin Heller (I think from Chanoch Teller?) tells of a woman who worked for a chessed organization and needed to get an ill man on a flight.

This woman wore an expensive necklace made of real pearls—obviously she valued it, else she wouldn't have spent so much money on it & worn it.

The flight agent at the desk refused to allow the ill man on this important flight until the chessed-woman removed the necklace and deftly slid it over to the agent.

Without missing a beat, the agent approved the man for the flight: Mission accomplished.

This woman clearly lived for Hashem. Ultimately, she knew how to use her possessions in Hashem's service. 

On page 8, Rav Miller offers the story of his friend who personally met the Chafetz Chaim. The anecdote displays both the humility & the wisdom of the Chafetz Chaim.

On pages 9-10, Rav Miller discusses the balance between spending to please your wife, to do chessed with her, & going overboard.

How Do You Spend Your Time? Literally, How Do You SPEND It?

How you spend your money connects to how you spend your time.

If a possession costs you 4 weeks of work, is it worth it?

A roomy high-quality washing machine for a family with several children is worth it.

But a light fixture? A wall painting? An area rug? A decorative statue?

​Better reconsider.

To foster a sense of the importance of time, let's look at what Rav Miller says on pages 12-13:  
Suppose a man was born into this world for only a few seconds and in that short amount of time he opens his eyes and he says, [Mah rabu ma'asecha, Hashem!]—How great are Your deeds, Hashem!” and then he dies.

That man lived for a very great purpose!

“Yeish koneh olamo b’shaah achas” — A man can acquire everything in one moment of life (Avodah Zarah 17a).

Because what is life? Life is an opportunity to do things, to accomplish!

Why It's So Important to Embrace Your Own Baby Steps

Judaism emphasizes the fantastic impact of baby steps.

In the modern society of grand gestures, masses of likes & followers, stories of amazing accomplishments, it's hard to give baby steps the appreciation they deserve.

But baby steps are the key to success!

Baby steps are 1 of THE MOST IMPORTANT actions you could ever carry out!

Here's Rav Miller on how the Kelm yeshivah proactively trained themselves to value baby steps (page 14):
​You know, in the Kelmer Yeshiva when they went home at night, it was after a long day of learning.

They went home late at night to their stanzas, the places where they stayed at night.

And then they came back again for five minutes!

​Everyone returned to the yeshiva; they made a special trip from home back to the beis medrash to learn five minutes. 

Five minutes of learning and then they went home again.

What was that all about? A game? A charade?

Oh no, it was a chinuch!

It was a training of the mind; it was to teach them that five minutes of learning is worth coming to yeshiva.

If you can learn five minutes, three minutes, one minute, it’s already a very important achievement.
A minute matters.

​On pages 14-15, Rav Miller doles out delicious advice on how to advance in learning (or any other kind of spiritual progress)...1 minute at a time.

How often do we hear Rav Miller emphasize the great benefit of a minute?

  • A minute of talking to Hashem each day.
 
  • A minute of thinking about Hashem while walking from one utility pole to the other.
 
  • A minute of thinking about Yetziat Mitzrayim (the Exodus from Egypt) while standing on a crowded bus & grasping a strap or pole.

Minutes build up over time.

You can experience astounding self-improvement over time, just through baby steps and itsy-bitsy bites.

​To help you actualize this all-important idea, please check out the Practical Tip on page 17.

May we all merit to succeed in making our minutes count.
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You can make it one step at a time.
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3 Ways How You Too Can Climb Yaakov's Ladder: Rav Avigdor Miller on Parshat Vayetzei

25/11/2020

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In Rav Avigdor Miller's dvar Torah for Parshat Vayetzei: Yaakov's Ladder, Rav Miller emphasizes that the dynamics of Yaakov Avinu's life reflect the journey of every individual Jew.

Ma'asei avot siman l'banim—What happened to our holy forefathers stands as a portent for what will happen to us.

Often discussed on a national level, Rav Miller now brings it down to the personal individual level.

​​As Rav Miller notes on page 4:
By means of studying the life of Yaakov Avinu, the virtuous Jew learns how to contend with the various difficulties of life, the ups and downs of Olam Hazeh, and still flourish in his avodas Hashem.

And in the end, like Yaakov, he proves successful; he establishes himself as an eved Hashem and he lives a happy life.

The Ladder of Life

One of the first major lessons presented in this parshah is the ladder in Yaakov's historical dream.

​Rav Miller emphasizes that the ladder represents our goal of constant upward motion: We must strive to reach Hashem.

Ladders aren't places to hang out and shmooze while playing poker. (The rungs don't make for comfortable seating, nor do they facilitate card games.)

Ladders represent a way to get from one place to another—in this case, UP.

​Secondly...why davka a ladder?

Why doesn't Hashem give us wings so we can fly up?

Or a magic carpet, so we can comfortably soar up to our spiritual apex?

Or a rocket? Then we can arrive at our holy destination all the faster.

But no.

Hashem WANTS us to climb.

Step by step, rung by rung—with lots of effort!

And repetition!

A ladder means you make the same movements again and again.

And that, says Rav Miller, looms as a primary lesson of Yaakov's history-making ladder.

Never Fear the Initial Hypocrisy or Discomfort

Rav Miller cautions us not to fear our initial feelings of hypocrisy.

When starting out on a new step of our spiritual journey, we often feel uncomfortable or fake.

With those newly observant to Judaism, a transition period exists in which the new baal teshuvah is basically a secular person who increasingly does mitzvot before he transitions into a frum person who sometimes stumbles in aveirot (transgressions).

​That's an entirely natural part of becoming frum.

Yet any person who takes on a new uplifting act or thought pattern experiences a similar dynamic, whether the person is FFB from a chashuv family or a newly-minted baal teshuvah.

We feel awkward & insincere.

Kol hahatchalot kashot—All beginnings are hard.

It takes time to get your foothold & find your rhythm.

It takes time to adapt to the new you and your new shell.

And despite the fumbling awkwardness of it all, take pleasure in the fact that you are doing something fabulous.  

What is the Difference between Emunah Sichlit & Real Emunah?

In his wonderfully witty way, Rav Miller clarifies the difference between emunah sichlit (intellectual belief) and real internalized emunah (page 6):
​Not like a man told me recently, “I have emunah; I believe and that’s enough.”

The truth is he does have a certain level of emunah.

He has emunah sichlis; he understands that our tradition is the only true one and I’m sure this man would even run into a fire for kiddush Hashem.

But that doesn’t mean he has real emunah.

Emunah means you believe in Hakodosh Boruch Hu at least the same way you believe that you have an Uncle Morris somewhere in the Bronx.

You’re maamim b’emunah sheleimah in your Uncle Morris. Your mother is telling you about him all the time and you even met him once at your bar-mitzvah—he gave you a present. You don’t visit him, he doesn’t visit you, but you know you have an uncle in the Bronx.
​
That’s emunah!

​Now, if you would believe in Hashem as much as you believe in that uncle, then you’re pretty good! I want to compliment you!
We want real emunah.

And for that we need to go back to our ladder.

Sometimes, you manage to stretch yourself up 2 or 3 rungs at a time. 

But mostly, expect repetitive climbing step by step.

And, starting at the bottom of page 6, Rav Miller offers us a few different programs for climbing that ladder.

3 Programs for Climbing Your Personal Ladder

Program #1
​Talk to Hashem for 1 minute each day.

​It's good to read pages 7-8 because Rav Miller offers delicious advice on how to do this program if you're not sure how to start or if you get stuck.

Intriguingly, Rav Miller advises you to pause in this 1-minute practice after a month, and then start up again.

He likens it to stopping for a rest in the middle of your climb.

Why?

Because even this 1 minute of holy conversation can start to feel routine and then you find yourself going through the motions, rather than keeping it meaningful.

Program #2
Recognize everything around you as the Hand of Hashem.

On pages 10-14, Rav Miller offers compelling ideas & descriptions to initiate this recognition.

Also, Rav Miller notes that you can follow Program #2 while you follow Program #1.

They complement each other.

Program #3
​Do things l'Shem Shamayim (for the sake of Heaven).

​Again, Rav Miller offers lots of solid direction & compelling examples on pages 15-19 for how to accomplish this.

You do this for the seemingly mundane stuff in life, like going to work, dealing with a customer, serving supper, washing a dish, bathing a child, eating lunch, sleeping, and so on.

​Having said all, that Rav Miller cautions us with the following (page 18):
Of course if it’s something that’s not going to help you; let’s say you bought a box of kosher chocolates and you lie down on the bed with a newspaper and you want to gorge yourself for an hour with the chocolates and you say, “I’m doing this l’sheim shomayim” – well, I don’t know if Shomayim would agree to that.

It’s the opposite of becoming strong to serve Him.

If you’re stuffing yourself with all the garbage, it’s not helping you become stronger and healthier.

But as much as possible, you can make your eating a ladder to climb towards Hakodosh Boruch Hu.

3 Things to Remember while Climbing the Ladder

While you climb your ladder, Rav Miller encourages us to keep in mind the following:

  1. Don't tell others about your involvement in these programs. (They often discourage you. For more on that, please see page 8.)
  2. Don't get discouraged. (page 19)
  3. Hashem is waiting for you at the top of the ladder. (pages 19-21) 

May Hashem shower us all with much bracha & hatzlacha in our climb.
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