Category: Rav Itamar Schwartz

Special Kislev Roundup: Rav Itamar Schwartz on Dreams & Women's Avodah, Plus a Special Segulah to See a Huge Miracle from Rav Chaim Palagi

27/11/2019

Rav Itamar Schwartz on Kislev & Dreams

Just in time for Rosh Chodesh Kislev, it's very worth checking out Rav Itamar Schwartz's transcribed lectures on Kislev.

In particular, Rosh Chodesh Kislev: Dreams & Sleep contains lots of beautiful information.

For example, the famous verse in Shir Hashirim – "I am asleep, but my heart is awake" – contains many deep meanings, one of which refers to the creation of Chava.

A woman is the heart. When Hashem created Chava, He put Adam to sleep.

So Adam was asleep, but his heart – Chava – was awakening & awake.

Rav Schwartz also discusses dream interpretation and it has a lot to do with your own level of self-knowledge.

In a dvar Torah on one of the parshahs (can't remember which one), Rebbetzin Shira Smiles explained that the kavanot of the person who prepared your food can influence your dreams.

She gave the example of a big rav who experience a disturbing dream out of character from his high spiritual level, and discovered later that the person who produced the meal was a person with low-level (or even anti-Torah?) thoughts.

I was so happy to come across this dvar Torah because I never understood why food can impact your dreams so much, and this gave a pretty good explanation for that influence.

I suppose there are other reasons too, but that's a pretty good one.

If I remember correctly, Rav Shalom Arush in Garden of Healing also mentioned that a person's thoughts and attitudes while preparing food can influence the eaters, both physically & spiritually, for better or for worse.

It's a classic tradition for Jewish women to say l'chvod Shabbot when preparing Shabbat meals and to murmur prayers while kneading challah dough.

Once again, it's not so much what you do, but HOW you do it that makes all the difference.

And, as always, Rav Schwartz emphasizes the importance of looking to rabbinical sources for self-help, as opposed to secular sources. In this article, he recommends Michtav M'Eliyahu/Strive for Truth in particular.

His post on dreams is also followed by a really interesting & helpful Q&A.

Rav Chaim Palagi's Kislev Segulah

Last year, I learned (I think on Shirat Devorah) of Rav Chaim Palagi's segulah to see a huge miracle this year.

Rabbi Alon Anava described it as the following 4 aspects:

1) From Rosh Chodesh until the last day of Chanukah, do not complain about anything (including in your thoughts).

2) Praise & thank Hashem a lot. (The 1st is "sur m'ra/turn from evil" and this 2nd step is "aseh tov/do good" – always a winning combination!)

3) Based on Sefer Yetzirah, Kislev is connected to the Hebrew letter samech ס, which hints at l'smoch – to rely, to count on. This is the underlying energy of Kislev. So work on relying on Hashem, and putting your trust in Him, i.e., bitachon.

4) Really put your faith in Hashem (emunah).

As you can see, the 4 steps are all interrelated.

It is also a very tall order. I must admit that I massively messed this up last year, so I'm aiming for more dedication & hoping for more siyata d'Shmaya this time around.

But you know what? Even if you already get all kvetchy, resentful, bitter, and faithless halfway through Rosh Chodesh, at least you still had some very spiritually powerful moments.

And even if you only find out about this segulah the day after Rosh Chodesh, it's still very worth trying.

And don't feel you've lost everything.

Pick yourself up & keep going until the last day of Chanukah.

Even if you fall on your face repeatedly, just keeping doing it.

Whether you'll merit a huge miracle some time this year or not, the above 4 steps contain tremendous positive spiritual power that benefit both you and the entire Am Yisrael.

We're all interconnected. Think of it like a person who tones & lifts weights with one leg while leaving the other by itself. He'll develop a major limp! But if he at least tries working out with the other leg, it'll still get stronger & hold up his body better than if he didn't work it at all.

That's us: one person altogether.

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2 Links to Expand Your Mind & Improve Your Life (with commentary)

5/11/2019

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Here are some links you might really enjoy:

Rav Avigdor Miller on Losing Your Bashert
Rav Miller describes how you can miss out on marrying your Divinely-ordained spouse, both before and even AFTER marriage.

This ties in with Rav Kanievsky's 5 tips for finding your soulmate because the idea of not criticizing nor being makpid with people helps you find what you really need in a spouse prior to marriage & is essential for a successful marriage after the wedding is over.

Rav Itamar Schwartz on Erev Rav: Amalek Exposed
Amalek seems a totally separate nation from the Erev Rav, who came from Mitzrayim and are now part of the Jewish people – at least in body.

So why is it that the Vilna Gaon typifies one of the Erev Rav types as "Amalek"?

There's a real connection, which is described in the above article.

Also, Rav Schwartz explains the connection between Erev Rav, Amalek, and the twin Exiles of Esav & Yishmael.

Just to give you a taste: Rav Schwartz explains that Amalek cannot stand Hashem's Oneness.

Amalek's all-consuming goal is to prevent Hashem's Oneness from being revealed.

This might explain why there is such a resistance to pure monotheism throughout the world, including self-proclaimed monotheists who are actually polytheists in belief & practice.

So Amalek strives to destroy Am Yisrael's oneness so that Hashem's Oneness cannot be revealed in This World.

Pretty nasty stuff, Amalek.

In line with that idea, please note that the Nazis were either nature-worshipers or atheists (both of which deny Hashem's Oneness), the Jew-persecuting Communists were atheists, and the Catholic Church, which instigated terrible persecution against the Jewish people over the centuries, has been polytheistic or pagan, depending on who you follow.

Why did they care so much about Jews secretly keeping Shabbat during the Inquisition?

Why did the Church feel the need to so horrifically torture Jews for keeping Shabbat?

Shabbat is a massive revelation of Hashem's Oneness in the world, if you read all that Chazal has to say about it.

(Note: I am not talking about the praiseworthy individual Catholics who risked torture & death to save Jews, but the powers-that-be behind the Catholic Church.)

Likewise, the holy & pure tzaddik Rav Levi Yitzchak Bender was one of the Ministry of State Security's most wanted "criminals" in the Ukraine in his time.

Why? Because he was so committed to Torah.

(Russia's Ministry of State Security was the forerunner to the KGB. Didn't they have bigger fish to fry than a couple of gentle, kind, saintly chassidim? I mean, it's the Ukraine after all...a matter of "state security," eh?)

Rav Bender & his fellow tzaddikim were forced to convert gerim in secret for fear of the Ministry of State Security. He was nearly executed for davening at the gravesite of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov.

Yes, saying Tikkun Haklali by the grave of a tzaddik is DANGEROUS to your nation's survival...if you're Amalek.

However, we can overcome Amalek by connecting to the point that came before Creation.

Why?

Because Am Yisrael came before Creation; we were b'machshavah techilah - we already existed in Hashem's Thoughts before Creation.

Only Am Yisrael possesses the power to connect to that pre-Creation point.

How to do that?

It's in the article, but just as a hint:
The Torah was the blueprint for Creation. It also preceded Creation.

Anyway, the whole post is really fascinating.

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The Lessons Found Deep Within

3/11/2019

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Even when you are firmly embedded within your frum lifestyle, you can still face startling wake-up calls about something you thought was 100% kosher – or even laudable – and discover that it actually isn't.

It could even be something that makes you feel good.

It could be something with pseudo-rabbinic approval.

But then you discover it's all wrong.

Or at least, partly wrong.

My latest wake-up call came after reading Rav Itamar Schwartz's ideas about concentrating on one's breathing, which he takes from Chazal (as clarified by Rav Abulafia, apparently), and does not borrow from non-Jewish sources.

Then a caring reader sent me a booklet of Rav Schwartz's ideas on breathing & how it specifically relates to the month of Cheshvan:
http://bilvavi.net/files/Bilvavi.On.Breathing.pdf

You can also see a version of it as a blog post:
http://bilvavi.net/english/rosh-chodesh-avodah-008-marchesvan-breathing

Now, I was never one of these people who likes to meditate, but I have done guided meditation with frum rabbinically approved people.

And these are people who care about their methods being 100% kosher.

So imagine my dismay when I read in the Q&A section (emphasis mine):

The Torah’s approach to the power of using breathing is not so that we should expel negative energy contained in the body and bring in positive energy.

A Torah-approved method that is being somewhat mirrored in the gentile practices of breathing is that a person can bring positive energy into his system; however, this is not being accomplished through the gentile methods.

A Torah-approved method would be to imagine a thought about something holy and to imagine that it is entering him, or that it is his enveloping his body, or something similar to this.

The gentile approach of breathing exercises, however, involves imagining a “light” that enters the body which purges it from all evil or negativity found in the body.

This approach is heretical to our Torah.

Uh...oh.

And while I haven't done this a lot nor have I done this since a while ago, I was concerned that something so seemingly innocent & positive is actually "heretical."

Trusting that Rav Schwartz is truly knowledgeable in this area helped me be honest with myself, and convinced me that I must not again try anything that instructs me to inhale "light" or "a power" – ANY kind of "power."

There's just Hashem.

Having said that, I think that one of the frum methods I tried indeed described it as imagining "the light of Hashem" being inhaled into you, which suits the Torah-approved method of breathing, according to Rav Schwartz.

That felt nice, but I never saw any of the promised effects from it, as far as I remember.

At the same time, I don't think all these things always make sure to mention Hashem as a firmly entrenched part of the exercise – which might explain an odd reaction I had to one given by a frum person, which was not only unhelpful but caused a very unpleasant feeling.

Rav Schwartz goes on to explain (emphasis mine):

The purpose of the Torah’s approach towards breathing is that breathing enables us to reach HaKadosh Baruch Hu found in the depths of the soul.

Unlike the gentile methods, which are entirely self-focused, the Torah way of breathing exercises is to come to live with Hashem in our life, through the breathing exercises.

And in a nutshell, I feel that's the problem with a lot of "kashered" exercises borrowed from Eastern practices.

It's all focused on self.

I remember when I read about Buddhism, for example, to see what all the attraction was about, and when I learned what the whole point was & what the greatest achievement could be, I was like, "That's it?"

Just something like, reaching a state of nothingness for absolutely no reason.

Whoopdee-doo.

And investing TONS of work and discipline to get there.

It was so pointless and meaningless, I really didn't & don't understand why intelligent, spiritual people were & are so attracted to it.

So I decided to try breathing Rav Schwartz's way, and immediately saw the difference.

Concentrating on my breathing sparked a dim image in my head of the whole breathing apparatus, the diaphragm, everything. My mind automatically thought, "Wow, how great are your deeds, Hashem! Look at how everything works together so well without my even noticing! I'm so grateful to You! You're Amazing!"

This was the spontaneous thought, not that I was trying to make it Gratitude Time. (Remember, I was just focusing on my breathing without using my mind for anything else.)

Needless to say, feeling awash in awe & appreciation of Hashem both relaxed & uplifted my mood.

At this point, I plan to use this periodically, but don't intend to make a daily practice out of it because, like I said, I'm really not a meditative type. Anyway, he said this isn't necessary spiritual work; it's just for people who feel attracted to it and wish to make it part of their avodah.

Not every soul needs this particular method of getting close to Hashem.

But yet again, it showed me the great importance of deriving help from authentic Jewish sources.

We don't need to look so often to the non-Jewish world for help.

And we certainly don't need "kashered" versions of unkosher methods.

Mah rabu ma'asecha, Hashem!

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UPDATED: Using Torah to Think Outside the Box

29/10/2019

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Years ago, I first heard the idea that while everything is in the Torah, you need to be a huge talmid chacham to extract it.

And in a nutshell, this was the heter to glean stuff (particularly psychology & self-help) from the non-Jewish world.

Initially, it was a relief to hear it.

Because I was so far away in my mind (despite being technically observant) from comprehending (let alone internalizing) original sources of mussar, the above concept really appealed to me back then.

Gradually, though, I saw it wasn't really true.

Obviously, we're allowed to glean stuff from the non-Jewish world.

However, when it comes to ideas that affect our inner selves and our ability to do teshuvah, it's actually very hard to discard the chaff (of which there is an ENORMOUS amount in popular psychology) and leave only the legitimate kernels.

That's why I really relished Rav Itamar Schwartz's statement that you actually need to be a big talmid chacham to sift through the secular stuff in order to get to the genuinely helpful stuff.

Here are Rav Schwartz's exact words from Woman's World 018: Avoiding Non-Jewish Influence (please scroll halfway to the section called "Who can learn psychology?") – the boldfaced underlined emphasis is my addition:

A person who is a very big Talmid Chochom, who learned the entire Torah – who finished Shas (Talmud Bavli, as well as Talmud Yerushalmi) and has learned the works of the Gra and the Maharal – he already has his outlook from the Torah, so he can sift through the information and see which non-Jewish literature is kosher and which isn’t.

He is able to obtain permission to learn it, because he can know how to sift out what isn’t true.

As you can see, it's the diametrical opposite to the idea bandied about in frum outlets.

Blind Spots are No Heter

Of course, the original idea presented in favor of secular methodologies derived from the fear of people misinterpreting Torah ideas, and especially distorting them to cater to their own deficiencies.

It's true that people do that. It's a legitimate concern.

Yes, it's true that people can read Torah sources with their blind spots solidly in place, making it difficult for them to extract the lessons they truly need from it.

(Many people especially love distorting the Rambam's or Rav Moshe Feinstein's words & ideas to align with his or her goals & personal flaws.)

But there is also a matter of ratzon (desire, good will).

Without Ratzon, Nothing Helps (well, almost nothing, anyway...please see the next section for what can help when even the ratzon just isn't there)

If you have a sincere ratzon, you'll get what you need from the original sources.

It might take a while and you might experience lots of confusion at the beginning, but eventually, you'll get it. (Kol hahatchalot kashot – All beginnings are difficult.)

Throughout recent decades, we've seen that therapy often doesn't heal people.

Many people feel better with therapy, but they often don't behave better. And even the ones who technically behave better, they aren't actually so much better inside.

For example, I've met former alcoholics and others who've ceased obviously dysfunctional behaviors, but they still aren't emotionally healthy people. They still have a lot of narcissism, for one. Not everyone, of course.

I also know parents (or their abused children) who were physically abusive, yet when compelled by a therapist to stop, the parents simply became emotionally neglectful, sarcastic, mocking, or some other form of rejecting & abusive behavior that much harder to define & legislate.

And I knew one problematic young husband married to a verbally abusive young wife. When she really got going (and let me tell you, she did so with great relish), he would rap her on the mouth with his fingers.

Needless to say, this crossed the line into physical abuse.

(FYI, I knew them both, and I knew her well enough before she got married. They both had middot problems that needed serious attention. She might have been a bit worse than him, to be honest, but he also needed to whip himself into shape.)

So a frum therapist, the young husband's mother (who was a very frum lady), and the young wife's mother (who was also a very frum lady) sat him down and made it abundantly clear that he was never, ever, ever to raise his hand against his wife in any way whatsoever, and that doing so was completely forbidden.

And he never did it again.

Instead, he also unleashed a verbal diatribe whenever his wife unleashed hers.

As the young wife's mother lamented, "Now he's striking her with his voice instead of his fingers." (And yes, she admitted that her daughter was doing the same.)

This obviously did not solve the real problem for either one of them.

Now they both behaved in an EQUALLY appalling manner.

Equality achieved!

Neither spouse worked on the core middot that led to halachically forbidden behavior, in which all abuse is forbidden by halacha, whether it is physical, verbal, mental, or emotional.

Yet in the above example, everyone involved simply responded according to the values & methods of secular psychology.

No Ratzon? So Just Keep Pouring It On

Likewise, a great many people in therapy simply become more narcissistic.

Why?

Narcissism is actually encouraged by popular psychology (though they use appealing words to get around that fact, so it doesn't look like conventional narcissist personality disorder).

But even if you end up with a genuinely wise therapist, you may not get much out of it unless you have a sincere ratzon.

So an insincere messed-up person might as well read Mishlei/Proverbs or make a daily study of Duties of Heart's Shaar Habechinah.

It's sort of like Rebbe Nachman of Breslov's parable of the sick prince who couldn't swallow, and therefore couldn't ingest any medicine to get better. So instead, a wise Sage advised the doctors to simply pour gallons of medicine over his mouth, with the understanding that at least a few drops would drip their way in, even as the vast majority of medicine would be lost.

Deal with Negative Feels via Mussar, Not Therapy

When I saw a young woman on the bus behaving inconsiderately (as featured in The #1 Way to Deal with Anger & Other Intense Negative Emotions), what would a therapist have advised me?

Ultimately, the scene was a hint from Hashem. It was a message that even if we take a lackadaisical attitude toward our own Olam Haba, we need to know that behaving beneath the Torah's standards hurts our fellow Jews.

We are literally all in the same boat; we are literally part of the same body.

This is great chizuk to keep on going even if we've given up on ourselves.

(Or even when we've convinced ourselves that something is okay "just this once...")

What therapist would've guided me toward the right kind of thinking?

True, a frum therapist here or there may have done so, but most would not.

How would secular methods have helped?

Secular methods would focus on me dealing with my anger toward the girl, on letting go or being more assertive, etc.

They (and therefore, I) would completely miss the very important mussar intended by Hashem.

(And no, I really haven't seen her since I got the message. Maybe she doesn't even really exist, and was just a pelephone-addicted golem created for mussar.)

What If You're Allergic to Conventional Psychiatry?

Finally, Rav Itamar Schwartz mentions a very important fact unconsidered by many people: What's good for one isn't necessarily good for another.

You can recommend strawberries as wonderful sources of vitamin C along with other benefits...but what if a person is allergic to strawberries?

Peanuts & fulim (fava beans) contain wonderful vitamins & minerals...but they are a death sentence to those allergic to their properties.

Likewise, in the Q&A If a person has problems with rage and he wants to calm down, should he take pills?, Rav Schwartz reveals that the conventional "prescription" method of treating the physical body for building one's spiritual state comes from people who aren't Jewish and it only works for people who aren't Jewish.

In another post (Protection from Illness of Erev Rav), Rav Schwartz quotes Chiddushei Chatam Sofer, Shabbat 86b:

The Chasam Sofer[1] stated that we cannot bring any medical proof from a non-Jew’s body to how we heal a Jew’s body, because since a Jew has a higher soul than a non-Jew, the healing is not the same.

The Chasam Sofer revealed to us a very novel concept – not only is a Jew’s soul vastly different than a non-Jew’s soul, but even their physical bodies are different.

This was a real whomp between the eyes because, to me, it also implies that all the studies of the effects of these medications don't apply to Jews – unless they were performed on Jewish subjects...which also reminds me of a rav (I heard it attributed to Dayan Fischer ztz"l, but I don't really know) who said that this is also included in the meaning of ein mazal b'Yisrael, i.e., conventional mazal doesn't apply to Jews because Hashem set Jews above the natural influences of things.

Physics applies to Jews (so don't drive too recklessly & don't do anything else dangerous), but "mazal" doesn't apply to Jews.

Back to medication: When, in Rav Schwartz's opinion, does a psychotropic medication play a part for Jews?

His answer:

In certain extreme situations, it may be used by a Jew who has fallen very low that for the time being, his life right now resembles a level that is very close to a gentile’s way of living.”

Really scrumptious food for thought.

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Special Kislev Roundup: Rav Itamar Schwartz on Dreams & Women's Avodah, Plus a Special Segulah to See a Huge Miracle from Rav Chaim Palagi

Rav Itamar Schwartz on Kislev & Dreams

Rav Chaim Palagi's Kislev Segulah

2 Links to Expand Your Mind & Improve Your Life (with commentary)

The Lessons Found Deep Within

UPDATED: Using Torah to Think Outside the Box

Blind Spots are No Heter

Without Ratzon, Nothing Helps (well, almost nothing, anyway...please see the next section for what can help when even the ratzon just isn't there)

No Ratzon? So Just Keep Pouring It On

Deal with Negative Feels via Mussar, Not Therapy

What If You're Allergic to Conventional Psychiatry?

Myrtle Rising

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