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Blog Update: Why This Blog Took a Long Break & Why It's Happening Again

28/10/2022

 
As regular readers & subscribers have noticed, two things happened with this blog:

  • The Feedburner subscription stopped working for real around 2 months ago.

In other words, subscribers will no longer receive new posts in their Inbox.

Long before this happened, a blog post went up warning of this, plus a notice sits in the sidebar.

I'm sorry for any inconvenience or "Huh?" that occurred from this (even though it's not my fault Google phased out Feedburner).

Having said that, I decided not to sign up for a new free subscription service. So anyone interested in new posts will need to come here to see them (which won't be often, as explained next).

  • I was mostly offline for around a month.

That's why this blog didn't get updated for so long.

What happened was this:

​I switched to Netfree's Limited Plan (Netfree also has other, more open plans, but I chose their Limited Plan), which blocks access to ALL websites except those appearing on this page:
https://netfree.link/block/basic

(For me, this page appears in Hebrew, but a friend outside of Eretz Yisrael said the page shows up in English for her.)

It happened suddenly in the middle of the night, when hit by the realization I simply must switch immediately.

It felt rude, like a host who invited everyone to an open-house, then suddenly disappeared without explanation.

I felt bad about the rudeness (and I apologize), but also realized I faced no other choice.

(It's hard to explain because, for some reason, I kept pushing off the switch in order to post an announcement on the blog, but kept pushing off that too, and then realized I needed to just DO it. Again, not sure myself how to explain what was happening.)

On Netfree's Limited Plan, I cannot even conduct a search on any search engine.

Also, Netfree "fines" users 20-25 shekels for switching to a more open plan.

(Though a small amount of money, it still acts as a wonderful deterrent.)

It also takes 2 hours for the switch to a more open plan to occur, so no instant "hit" or gratification—very wise.

And on the Limited Plan, I cannot access my own blog...nothing, other than the boring utilitarian sites seen at the above link.

This means that if you send me a link, I will not be able to access it (unless it is one of those boring websites featured in my plan, as appearing on the page in the above Netfree link).

(If they really want me to see an article, some people copy the text, paste it into an email, and send it to me instead of a link.)

So that's what happened.

I'm on a more open plan very temporarily for now, but am switching back to the Limited Plan pretty quickly.

Internet Ups & Downs

​Why did I do that?

And why am I doing it again?

First of all, I'd been having conflicts over my Internet use for ages.

It's too much to go into the whole history and back-and-forth...sometimes I had Internet, sometimes not at all, sometimes only email, plus I went through 3 different filters using their different plans, etc.

In short, this is personal and varies for each individual.

Each person needs to be honest with themselves about why they have Internet and why they have their particular plan/filter to access the Internet.

At one point, I switched from email-only to Internet for parnasa.

I didn't realize no respectable rabbinical heter actually existed for this in the way many people assumed.

​(Rav Itamar Schwartz explains this in detail here: https://question.bilvavi.net/blog/2021/08/24/the-gedolims-view-on-internet-use/)

For me, this loomed as a big mistake only realized later.

Upon honest analysis, the benefits and positive results do not outweigh the negative—at least, not for me.

Hashem showed me over the past year that even the reasons I initially thought I needed Internet were actually not so true...and at this point, they no longer held true at all.

(This made me sad and still pangs me in some ways, but the truth often hurts—at least in the beginning of a transition. Later, that same originally painful truth can paradoxically end up feeling great!)

A Significant & Unique Benefit to Living in Eretz Yisrael

I'm very lucky that in Eretz Yisrael, you really don't NEED the Internet. 

I think it's different in the USA and most other modern countries because it seems certain services simply cannot be accessed without an app or some kind of Internet connection.

Not 100% sure, but this is my impression.

Yet because of the burgeoning religious clout in Eretz Yisrael, most services offer a non-Internet option.

Is it as convenient?

No.

But it exists.

Heck, I even lived without my own cell phone for the past couple of years.

Because I live in a charedi community (where it's admittedly unusual to not have a cell phone at all, even the little dinky "dumbphones"), people still managed with me—and did so non-judgmentally—even though I seemed to be one of the only people with no cell phone at all.

(Recently I started working almost full-time at a charedi gender-segregated office, and it made sense to have one. So now I have a little dinky Internet-free text-free cell phone.)

Having said all that, I know some extremely & sincerely frum people who finally caved in to get a computer with email ONLY.

Charedi communities also host Internet centers using a Netfree filter, so a person in real need of an Internet connection can use those.

I personally won't be doing that because it ends up being too stressful, (I find the need for passwords extremely aggravating for some reason—also at work!), the sometimes lack of privacy & being around other people when I'm an introvert at heart, going so much out of my way to get to the place (even though 2 Internet centers are within walking distance)...

...and when I tried to access my own blog to post articles at one of these places, I could not access it for some reason—which likely has a solution because I knew of another Weebly-user who posted regularly from an Internet center to her blog—but it's too much aggravation for my kind of personality & in the phase I'm in now.

​And that's the gist of it.

The Surprising & Liberating Result of Severe Internet Limitation

Initially, I expected to feel very bored without any real Internet access.

I thought I'd suffer some kind of withdrawal.

After all, when I switched to Netfree in the beginning (on its more open plans with access to more websites and even specifically chosen YouTube videos), there were certain now-prohibited sites I secretly longed for over several months.

So I thought that might happen again when choosing an even more limited plan.

After all, the only websites available on the Netfee's Limited Plan are ones like "The Municipality of Ashkelon" or "Bank Hapoalim" or "Train Schedules" or "Gmail."

In other words, only utilitarian sites remain available.

For example, no temptation exists to go surfing through the Discount Bank website with its pages of Hebrew text.

Sure, I could spend a lot of time in my Gmail account, but am not compelled to...so I don't.

To my surprise, I experienced only a couple of phases of boredom, but remedied them by doing something in the house that needed to be done, or running an errand, or reading a good book I hadn't read in a while.

In general, I felt much better too.

Even more oddly, I stopped pining for that tiny handful of sites I'd really enjoyed before Netfree.

Why did cutting out the Internet so drastically eliminate my longings when limiting it moderately did not?

I'm baffled.

Anyway, I also started going to sleep earlier, getting more things done both in the house and out (despite an actual decrease in time due to a new work schedule), and in general felt happier.

Also, I fully expected to miss the sites I visited the most...yet didn't.

Now that I've been back online for a week, I see why it's so bad for me. 

The War for Your Brain

Self-discipline is not the problem here.

The Internet (and its tentacles of social media, apps, etc.) are built & fine-tuned to suck you in by your brain chemistry (to funnel money & control to their greedy creators).

​I've written here before about our brains being under attack. We're wired a certain way and the creators of these technologies know all about it.

For example, please see these posts on the topic:
  • www.myrtlerising.com/blog/why-this-generation-is-so-astounding
(Scroll down to "Your Brain under Attack" within the post.)
  • www.myrtlerising.com/blog/did-you-get-your-normal-dosage-of-awe-anxiety-and-anger-today
  • www.myrtlerising.com/blog/standing-for-nothing-usa
  • www.myrtlerising.com/blog/what-i-learned-about-taming-my-email-habits
  • how-to-avoid-being-a-victim-of-mind-control.html

I know people who boast of being perfectly self-disciplined about their Internet use, but I see they are not. They simply adjust their standards to fit their self-serving principles and definitions.

Not purposely, but instinctively. They're honestly not aware of what they're doing.

Again, we're all on different levels and different stages of our journeys.

This is where I'm personally holding.

​I wish I could get down to having just email, but I'm not ready for that.

A Short Note before Saying Good-Bye Again

Initially, I planned this week to finish up any half-finished or three-fourths-finished posts hanging around, and to post a couple of new ones rolling around in my head.

But I didn't! I just re-posted an old post and created another mostly from copy 'n' paste...and that was it.

Even this post, which I meant to write immediately, only got done now!

I just couldn't do it. Not sure why.

So I'm going back to the Limited Plan.

In other words, this website will remain online, but I'm not actually here.

In the meantime, if I manage it, I will write posts in Word, and then switch plans again to access this blog, post a series of scheduled posts, then go back to the Limited Plan again.

​I don't think that's a perfect solution, but it's honestly where I'm holding now.

Someone brilliantly suggested sending out posts by email subscription and avoiding the blog entirely.

That's actually a real good alternative, but I'm hesitant about encountering the same response I had before to some who subscribers who felt the need to immediately respond in a way I found challenging whenever triggered by a post. 

(And they could go off-topic or misunderstand the whole meaning of the post in their triggered state. Not bad people at all, but just people who didn't realize what they were doing, by misunderstanding, getting triggered, then responding in that passionate state. I've done it a couple of times myself — though not anymore — so I don't judge them negatively, but objectively realize that, despite their good intentions, I find it too much of a challenge. Not coincidentally, this happened most with those who received the post directly to their Inbox as opposed to reading it on the blog.) 

It seems something about receiving it as an email created that dynamic.

So maybe I will do that, but not sure yet.

​Thanks for reading.
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These are questions asked by Rav Moshe Chaim Luzatto in his masterpiece: Da'at Tevunot.

A True Story of How Taking a Small Step in the Right Direction regarding Internet Filters Brought about a Yeshuah

24/10/2022

 
The following is a verified true story (courtesy of the Doeihu organization) that happened this month:
Rosh Hashana 5783

This story was told by R’ Yosef Panet Shlit’a, Rav of Beis Medrash Meor Hatefilla in Boro Park, on Shabbos Shuva.

This story happened to a mispalel in his shul on this past Rosh Hashana 5783 [September 26-27, 2022].

​The Doeihu staff reached out to Rav Panet to get a firsthand account of this powerful story.

Following is what Rav Panet shared:


Rosh Hashana night after Maariv, everyone filed past to give and get a l'shana tova.

In the crowd before me was also R’ Yankel (*not real name). After I wished him a l'shana tova, he looked at me with pain-filled eyes and asked me to give him a bracha for parnassa tova [a good livelihood] as well.


I know R’ Yankel who is part of my kehilla for many years. He has a few successful businesses, and to top it off he has a large Amazon selling business.

I knew that in the past he was doing very well, but from his tone and expression I realized that something was going on.

He doesn’t usually ask for such a bracha, and especially not in such a manner.


I watched during the Rosh Hashana davening the next day he wrapped himself deep in his tallis and davened with unusual kavana as if oblivious to the world.

Noticing his pain and worry, I decided to approach him right after Rosh Hashana and ask him if he needs any financial help for yom tov, or if there is anything else I can do.


Before I even opened up the conversation, R’ Yankel told me that he wants to share a personal story.

He said,


“The Rav knows that I have a large Amazon account from which I make a nice parnassa. A few weeks ago I got an email from Amazon informing me that due to suspicious activity on my account they were not going to give me access to the money from any transactions on my account. In other words, I could continue selling without earning. Whoever is in this line knows that if Amazon shuts you down, trying to get them to reopen your account is like talking to a brick wall.

"I had a huge bill from all the merchandise that I had bought for the coming season, which I started to pay off with my side businesses. But while sales were continuing on going, money was not coming in, aside from the fact that Yom Tov bills were piling up. I was in a huge dilemma.

"Finally, I managed to get a zoom conference meeting with Amazon for the Monday before Rosh Hashana. The meeting showed me what I was up against. They drove me crazy about minor details, asked to see very many documents and proof, and nitpicked wherever they could. They were not here to help me out at all. I thought that, after all the documents I showed and the questions I answered, that I had proved my innocence and proof of identity, but they felt otherwise.

"They decided that they can only open access to the money in my account if I send them every invoice from every transaction I ever made on Amazon from day 1. After that, I met with a major Amazon consultant in this field to see what steps I could take to save my account. He explained that usually when they nitpick on every invoice, they are not satisfied with what they get. Apparently, what they want to see and the way that our community does business doesn’t mix well. He told me to send what I have and hope for the best. From his tone of voice, it didn’t sound like he expected good results.

[Note: The "way our community does business" means we aren't available on Shabbat or chagim to deal with business issues & orders. I've heard before that Amazon penalizes anyone who isn't available to deal with issues within 24 hours, and a lot of shomer Shabbat sellers struggle with this. This goes back to how the Internet hates boundaries: hi-tech-hates-boundaries.html — MR]


"I was watching my whole business come crashing down. I was shipping out goods and not getting back any money for a few weeks now. To continue this way would bring me to bankruptcy. I decided that I would first do my best to daven for a good new year on Rosh Hashana and send in my documents only after making that hishtadlus.

"Now the Rav knows what was behind my request Rosh Hashana night. With all I was going through, I was barely holding myself enough together to make a seudah. ”

R’ Yankel continued,

“Rosh Hashana morning it happens to be that I daven Musaf in a different shul. Before tekias shofar, the Rav got up and gave over some divrei hisorerus [words to ignite spiritual arousal]. Particularly, he spoke passionately about technology and the importance of filters. He ended by encouraging everyone to make a kabbalah in the area of technology at whatever level they are on. I was very inspired, knowing what I was up against and the yeshuah that I needed, and I made my kabala right then and there to install a filter on all my internet devices, and as well to fully block Instagram 
(*see Editor’s note below)  with the hope that this would bring a yeshua to my business.

"Yom Tov passed in a daze of fervent tefillos. I davened harder than ever before in my life. And then came Motzei Yom Tov, terrified about what I am about to go through.

"An email from Amazon was waiting in my inbox…. I opened it with trepidation to find good news! It said that my account had been cleared and they were going to forward my money very soon. The email had been sent the first day Rosh Hashana at 1:07 PM. Exactly the time that I made my kabala before tekias shofar!”

Rav Panet concludes,

“The story is not yet over! One day later, R’ Yankel went to Tag to fulfill his kabala and he got a call as he was sitting in the Tag office. It was a buyer who he was after for a while and never was able to get him to buy from him, but today the buyer reached out to him, and wanted to place a huge order. It was clear to R’ Yankel that the immediate turnaround in his company came about as a result of his kabala in technology.”

* * *

 
According to halacha and the ruling of all Gedolei Yisroel a filter on a computer is a necessity.

Therefore, even if one does not need a particular yeshua one must put on a filter.

However, when people hear such stories it’s like a wink from heaven, a sign from Hashem that this is the right thing to do.

​These stories give people chizuk to overcome what gedolim are saying is the challenge of our generation. 
וממנו ילמדו וכן יעשו.
 
(*A note from the editor: Instagram itself cannot be filtered, therefore having it open is considered having unfiltered internet. And, as mentioned many times, one "must" put a filter on all internet devices, which means that keeping the Instagram app (site) etc. regularly open is assur - because it is open, unfiltered internet (and leads directly to immodesty).

First of all, thank you so much to NEJ for sending me Doeihu emails, including this one.

In addition to providing clear halachot for behavior in the office and other places, Doeihu also provides stories like the above, true stories about regular frum people and their struggles in the work place.

They don't always show huge results like the above.

Sometimes, it's baby steps, like following the correct halacha when it's mildly uncomfortable, yet obligatory.

Many times, there is no fantastic ending (i.e., "And then I found a shidduch, managed to buy a luxury home, got super rich, and finally had a baby!")...but simply the basic satisfaction of doing things right.

This daily interesting and extremely practical newsletter is available in English, Yiddish, or Lashon HaKodesh.
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Please note I get nothing for promoting Doeihu and they don't even know I'm promoting them. I've just really benefitted from their material and believe others will too.

Blog Update: No More Comments At All

7/11/2021

 
Shalom,

I've officially disabled comments on this blog, even though that setting apparently does not apply itself to previous posts, making it look like I need to go into every previous post & manually close comments for each post...which isn't practical because it means going through hundreds of posts.

So older posts will apparently still show the comments enabled along with the option of commenting, even though officially, they've been disabled.

I apologize in advance if anyone gets confused or frustrated by that bug.

Anyway...nothing happened; just noticed I wasn't being consistent with my new mostly-no-comments comment policy, so thought it best to disable them altogether.

If you want to know more about why I scaled back on the comment section in the first place, please see this post:
blog-update-of-2-changes-1-a-new-most-popular-section-and-2-no-more-comments-including-a-lengthy-explanation-of-why.html
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A whimsical image to balance out an otherwise boring post


Blog Update of 2 Changes: #1 A New "Most Popular" Section and #2 No More Comments (including a lengthy explanation of why)

9/8/2021

0 Comments

 

Change #1: The Addition of a "Most Popular" Posts Section

This new section presents a list of this blog's most popular posts throughout the past 6 years (as best as I could figure, anyway).

​They're arranged by topic.

You can always find them by clicking on "Most Popular" in the blog's banner above, or simply click this link now:
Most Popular

Change #2: No More Comment Section on Future Posts

Note: The following sections contain analysis of the Web-wide comment section phenomenon, and not just why this specific blog will mostly no longer feature comments.

Since last Rosh Hashanah, I've been considering closing down the comment section for future posts.

It seemed like a good idea for a variety of reasons.

Just for knowing: Nothing happened recently (so those of you who recently left comments should feel reassured it was nothing you did or said to spark the comment shutdown).

​It was something I felt an inner push to do for a long time.

My blog never got so many comments anyway, so closing the comment section isn't a big deal.

So this announcement is more a courtesy to let readers know that while the comment function remains open, comments won't generally be published.

Some people prefer to communicate via a comment rather than email. Leaving a comment is simpler & quicker than email.

So I wanted to leave that option open.

But occasionally, a comment may be published if it meets the following criteria:
  • Provides a FACTUAL correction
  • Asks a vital question
  • Provides vital information lacking in the original post...

...then yeah, I might publish that comment.

(I could also make a correction or update within the post without publishing the comment.)

For an example of a comment making a factual correction, please see here:
http://www.myrtlerising.com/blog/loneliness-rejection-as-aspects-of-mashiach#comments


Over the years, I realized the comment section is a weird place because it looks fairly innocent & not so different than the Letters to the Editor section in a newspaper.

Sometimes, the comment section is even more interesting than the articles.

(You know those websites where you barely skim the post, then head straight to the comment section? Exactly.)

Some people think closing comments means closing free speech & expression.

It could mean that, but doesn't have to mean that.

So why knock out the comment section?

The Weirdness (and Often Uselessness) of The Comments Section

​A popular non-Jewish blogger who regularly garnered 100 comments per post closed the comments section of his blog.
 
Why?
 
He found he spent too much time rebutting commenters who simply hadn’t read his post carefully and these rebuttals forced him to reiterate what was already in the post.
 
In other words—meaningless exchanges.
 
The nastiness in many comments also wore him down.
 
Even only 10 nasty comments out of 300 neutral/positive comments can a tax a blogger.
 
And those 150 word replies that look like the blogger whipped in them out in a few minutes? Those can take a surprisingly long time to formulate—not to mention the emotional energy sometimes involved.

In a frum comment section, you're more likely to encounter more intelligent, useful (and much funnier!) comments.

But those are often interspersed with the same insults & inanity found everywhere else.
 
Additionally, the comment section isn't just about interacting with the people there, but interacting in front of an unseen global audience.

​Furthermore, anything you write is now permanent (unless you delete it & hopefully wasn’t saved by anyone else).
 
So any comment you make in your comment section needs to provide a very clear voice and meaning—as if you were speaking.

But because you mostly don’t know to & before whom you’re speaking, it’s difficult to decide how to phrase your replies in a way that expresses best what you want to say.

You can end up spending too much time overthinking whether you should end with an exclamation point or a period, and whether a smiley or frowny is cute or pathetic or confusing.
 
For example, I knew a woman who has undergone a very stressful life. To compound matters, she had some sort of problem, like a mild mental disability—or what a psychologist friend of mine calls “low-normal.” 
 
Anyway, this woman revealed that she was very active on online forums. She submits comments as her spirit moves her. She can’t differentiate between rumor-mongering and responsible speech, plus she offers inappropriate advice to others and can’t refrain from attacking back if she ever felt attacked.
 
And her writing didn't necessarily give her away.

Paying attention to spellcheck can help a lot in comments.

​Also, she kept her comments pretty short, so there wasn’t that much room for error. Finally, abbreviations, lower case, and lack of punctuation are so acceptable online today, errors in grammar, syntax, and spelling don't necessarily indicate the intelligence of the commenter.
 
The point is that you really don’t know whose commenting online and interacting with you and criticizing or advising you (unless you DO know).
 
Furthermore, unkind or grating comments contain more pain per pop simply because they are aimed at you before an unseen audience of hundreds or thousands (or more).
 
You can easily find yourself in embarrassing and frustrating situations where, despite your noblest intentions, you respond with too much heat to an infuriating comment.

The Global Open House

​The comment section is an unnatural place.

Picture holding a continuous open-house invitation announced to the entire world.

A lot of people show up...mostly to just watch whatever’s going on & what you have to offer.

​But everyone shows up with a paper bag over their head, so you can’t really see everyone & aren't even sure exactly how many people arrived.

You intersperse the gathering with short speeches here and there.

Yet out of the whole crowd, only 2 or 3 people ever respond, usually positively (which you really appreciate).

A few times, a couple of attendees step out to politely correct a mistake in your speech, which you also appreciate and which you handle well by admitting your mistake and correcting it.

But most of the time, there’s no response at all.

Yet occasionally after giving a talk (in which you invested tremendous time, energy, research, plus speaking from your heart), someone suddenly strides out the crowd and loudly disagrees with you.

You have no idea who is this person inside the paper bag, what his background or knowledge consists of—and even worse, he also utilizes manipulative debate techniques.

You’re not sure exactly how to respond because you’re not sure where he's coming from, what he already knows, whether the fault lies in your presentation or in his understanding...plus what everyone else would consider mean or intelligent or convincing or pathetic.

You also want to behave with good middot because Hashem is watching too.

​So you give it your best shot, but because your detractor is either manipulative or innocently-yet-extremely-self-absorbed, nothing gets through.

Another person remarks passionately on your speech, but you aren’t sure exactly what she meant because her speech is muffled by the paper bag over her head, but she seems sincere & you appreciate her intention.

Then a car stops near the curb of your lawn and another person hops out, shouting, “Hey, your last speech came to my Instagram account from someone who attended this open-house. And I just want to tell you that you really need to educate yourself!”

You understandably find this even more disorienting and again, struggle to respond in a way that is convincing, articulate (to everyone, including the people who aren’t listening carefully), and mature.

Furthermore, she harps on a relatively minor point in your speech, overshadowing the main and most inspiring points.

Then she twists around what you said into something you didn’t mean.

(In other words, her criticism isn't even valid.)

Later, you discover that all the people who were initially inspired by your last speech ended up with a negative and erroneous impression of your words—all because of that impulsive self-important heckler.

​***

Would the above ever happen in real life?

NO.

The self-righteous, opinionated people who just jump in with no introduction would be considered really weird and inappropriate in real life...yet this is exactly what happens on blogs.

Think of the unpleasantries you got into via email or social media or in a forum or comment section—unpleasantries you never would have in real life (including not via snail mail either).

Do we want those interactions on our Heavenly cheshbon?

Pre-Approved Comments Come with Issues of Their Own

 Setting a blog up to approve every comment before it appears also creates issues. 

​Deciding whether to approve a comment can also be fraught with doubts. Maybe most of the comment is great, but one sentence contains lashon hara.

And what if the commenter inadvertently offers misleading or harmful information—do you just let it go or do you risk offending or putting down the person in a very public forum?

​If the comment is very long (i.e., its writer put a lot of time & effort in it) or comes from a sensitive and pained heart, but it violates your comment policy or halacha (or both)—do you publish it?

Once someone replied to a strident comment with some very good insights—along with labeling the initial commenter as "self-righteous" and accusing the person of causing a lot unnecessary emotional pain.

The thing is, I AGREED with the second commenter. The first commenter indeed stated his/her opinion with self-righteous insensitivity.

So my sympathies lay with the second commenter.

But after a lot of deliberation, I decided not to publish that second comment because I was pretty sure the offensive commenter would not only respond with a condescending lack of remorse, but heap on even more offense (with the intent of being "helpful," of course).

I didn't want my blog to turn into that kind of thing, so I refrained from publishing the responding comment (and feeling bad because I really liked & agreed with that commenter).

Furthermore, struggling to understand exactly what the commenter means and then respond appropriately is also often fraught with difficulty.

Add into the mix people who comment in a language in which they aren't so comfortable and you’ve got a recipe for confusion and frustration.

Misunderstandings happen all the time online. They don’t have to turn into flame wars if both sides judge each other favorably, but they are frustrating nonetheless.

And, as described above, reading and responding to comments can take a surprisingly huge chunk of time.
So all that is why comments will mostly no longer be published on this blog.

​(And it took me a year to get around to finally putting that idea into action.)

Finally, I'd like to thank everyone who left comments that:
  • added great insights & important information to the topic
  • offered vital corrections
  • asked pertinent & intriguing questions
  • left kind words & encouragement 

Thank you!
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0 Comments

I Support the Goal of Amazon Employees to Fulfill Their Ideals & Avoid Hypocrisy!

30/5/2021

 
Because this is the Internet, and because any ability to perceive various uses of humor (sarcasm, irony, pathos, etc.) disappears during online browsing, please be forewarned that a large part of this post is written tongue-in-cheek.
What's more, I think that's what space aliens are REALLY mining here on Earth, IMHO. If you've noticed, the rise in UFO sightings has coincided with the decrease in the ability to utilize or perceive humor in writing. I really think I'm on to something here...

Hamodia recently published an article about people who clearly lack even the vaguest awareness of on which side their bread is buttered:
https://hamodia.com/2021/05/27/amazon-employees-ask-bosses-support-palestinians/

Their 4th demand states:
To sever business contracts and corporate donations with companies, organizations, and/or governments such as the Israeli Defense Forces.

Ironically, a significant part of their Amazon salary & source of their jobs comes from...Israel.

​For example:

  • The USB flash drive we all use (and is widely sold Amazon, and which is used widely by Amazon employees & customers for Amazon digital products) was developed by the Israeli M-Systems in conjunction with IBM.

(Although to be fair, China, Singapore, and Taiwan all claim to have developed it independently at the same time.)

  • Intel 8088 processer, the first personal computer microprocessor (used by IBM), which inspired many Intel "offspring" in that field.
 
  • Waze, the popular GPS system.
I certainly hope these Amazon employees never use it and make no money off of selling anything to do with Waze, so as not to benefit their Israeli producers in any way, in accordance with the demands detailed in their impassioned letter.

  • I'm also very concerned about Amazon's selling of the Quicktionary translator pen, first produced in Yerushalayim by Wizcom Technologies.
I certainly hope these concerned Amazon employees will stop making any money selling these pens and refuse to use them themselves...EVER.

  • These Amazon employees also must not have anything to do with the Wix webhost.
Do they know that every time they visit a website hosted by Wix, they are supporting an Israeli company in Tel Aviv? Do they ever use Wix for their own websites? I sincerely hope not!

  • I also hope they never sell or use anything to do with VoIP technology, produced by VocalTech in Herzilyah.
These Amazon employees MUST avoid this technology like the plague!!!

​The origins of VoIP are worse than any of the above.

Read this scandalous reveal from Wikipedia:
​VocalTec was founded in 1985 by Alon Cohen and Lior Haramaty while still serving together in the IDF, and was officially incorporated in 1989.

Did you get the "while STILL serving in together in the IDF" part?

It doesn't get worse than that!

Also, Amazon employees, please STAY FAR AWAY from anything to do with Text-to-Speech technology, which provides revolutionary assistance to blind people. Alon & Lior made transformative developments in that too and practically invented the Hebrew version.

  • Also, no more Rummikub! Ephraim Hertzano invented it.
Okay, he first created it in Romania. But after coming to live in Eretz Yisrael in the 1940s (the 1940s? why would he leave Romania davka then? hmm...), he continued to develop the game in ISRAEL and then market Rummikub worldwide. Delete Rummikub from Amazon!

​Okay, guys...you probably thought the above was bad enough.

But you know what?

​I've saved the worst for last:
​
  • Kindle.

Yes, yes...THAT Amazon ereader.

Amazon corners the market in ebooks & ereaders.

And (deep breath) the original Kindle technology was mostly developed in...Israel.

The Herzliyah Industrial Zone, to be exact.

I'm so sorry.

Please, above-signed Amazon employees...PLEASE...just give your entire ebook market over to Kobo, Barnes & Noble, and Apple. 

​Toss out all the Kindles and just let Nook take over the entire market. (Or Kobo Clara HD. Or Apple Reader.)

Sever those business contracts with Israel companies, organizations, and/or governments such as the Israeli Defense Forces—and do so NOW!

​It is clearly the best way to support the Palestinians along with the the Palestinian jihad ideology, Gazan missile attacks on civilians, Palestinian terror attacks, rampant domestic violence within their own community, FGM on their own females, using their fellow Palestinian children as human shields, and much more.

(Not that all Palestinians are bad, of course! However, as a society, they suffer from certain issues, such as Arabian male privilege, lack of diversity, and—well—a tendency toward unbridled za'am. No offense.)

Please, above-signed Amazon employees! Do your best to fulfill your stated ideals & avoid any vestige of hypocrisy or personal interest.

​We're counting on you to do the wrong thing.
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Image by Tablet Helpline from Pixabay
Buh-bye, Kindle! Your origins simply aren't "woke" enough!

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Part I of How the Torah Provides Guidance for the Best Governmental Policies: Yosef HaTzaddik in Egypt vs. Socialism & Communism

How the Texas Cold Disaster Revealed Torah Wisdom

10/3/2021

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As Jews, we're supposed to view the big picture as much as we can in our limited 3-dimensional state.

And most people (including me) struggle to maintain the balance between normal derech-hateva understanding & efforts versus maintaining a solid knowledge that Hashem is orchestrating everything down to the tiniest detail.

That's normal. But it's a paradox and not an easy one to live in (which is a massive part of our job here in This World).

Furthermore, all the different analyzations about a variety of subjects available today with finely tuned theories (which often include profound bias—or undergo adjustment to fit political correctness) often seem intriguing.

It's easy to get caught up in all the debate & analysis surrounding a hot topic or an intriguing phenomenon.

I have the same tendency, of course. So I try to rein it in as much as I can.

But over the years, I discovered that listening to our real Torah Sages and their conclusions help one arrive at the truth much faster—and putting it all together under a Torah lens proves even more intriguing than a sound-clip-oriented TV debate or the flaming back-and-forth in a forum or comment section.

A Brief Look at Winter in Texas throughout the Century

Let's look at Texas in February 2021, for example.

Shockingly cold weather hit Texas.

First of all, most people don't know that the state of Texas is huge:
268,596 square miles/695,662 square kilometers

The entire United Kingdom could fit into Texas.

Or the Netherlands, Slovenia, Switzerland, Austria, Belgium, Slovakia, Czech Republic, Macedonia, Luxembourg and Hungary could easily move into Texas together.

​Some Texas ranchers own property reaching over 400 square miles.

So when we're talking about a polar vortex covering Texas, we're talking about something massive.

Climate-wise, most of Texas is hot-subtropical. The next biggest climates are hot semi-arid, cold semi-arid—with pockets registering as hot or cold deserts.

​See here:
Picture
By <a href="//commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Redtitan" title="User:Redtitan">Adam Peterson</a> - <span class="int-own-work" lang="en">Own work</span>, CC BY-SA 4.0, Link
In much of Texas, winter temperatures rarely dip below the 40s (Fahrenheit) with many days of weather in the 60s.

A friend who grew up in Texas recalled going outside in summer clothes when it snowed in the winter.

Why?

The air was so hot, the snow melted on its way down. It never made it to the ground.

I never heard of such a thing. She said they watched the snow come down, then melt in midair.

That's a snow day in Texas.

In fact, most of Texas sees less than an inch of snow per year.

​On the other hand, Texas gets hit with blizzards—but not over the ENTIRE state.

Northwest Texas got hit with 10-20 inches of snow in 1957, which killed off 20% of the local cattle population & defeated snow plows.

A 1985 January storm left San Antonio covered in over a foot of snow—the worst San Antonio had seen in 100 years (must be all that global warming!).

West Texas caught one of the worst blizzards in its history in 2017 (dang that global warming again...) with 8-foot snow drifts & 50 mph winds.

Houston's 2 biggest snowfalls hit in 1899 (20 inches) and 1960 (over 4 inches).

In 2018, the North American Ice Storm hit Northwestern Texas in a 1000-mile rampage.

But none of these caused anywhere near the damage & suffering Texans faced as a whole in February 2021.

Results of the Cold Disaster in Texas

Right now, you can hear Texans gnashing their teeth about their failed infrastructure during the February disaster.

Pipes burst or froze & the power grid failed, leading to millions of people stranded at home in freezing conditions without heat, electricity, or water.

(Even people with generators didn't necessarily have heat because key components froze.)

One house burned to the ground while the firemen watched because their equipment could not operate under the conditions.

Around 70 people died. 

Texas lost over half its grapefruit crop and 100% of its orange crop.

Burst pipes resulted in the loss of 325 million gallons of water.

Overall damage resulted in estimates of 195 billion dollars.

Some Texans are receiving utility bills charging them tens of thousands of dollars—even when they didn't have power.

Texan pipes aren't made for such freezing conditions and many Texans blame their politicians because even though extreme cold rarely hits Texas, it still happens.

(Although when has such extreme cold hit most of Texas for such an extended period of time—10 days?) 

I think the infrastructure could have been better prepared. Texas authorities also gave terrible advice by telling people not to drip their pipes, which would've helped prevent their bursting—maybe.

​But even if Texas had been prepared for its rare short-lived snow storms, does that mean it would've been prepared enough for this one?

Despite cold weather hitting Texas periodically, it was only this severe storm that broke the water pipe in a northeastern building—a pipe that managed to survive since 1924.

While the Texas government must do its best to benefit its citizens, focusing solely on prepping & water pipes misses the big picture.

Winterized Infrastructure Would Have Helped, But Not Completely Prevented the Problems—Why?

Hashem knew the exact limits of the Texan infrastructure and He sent them a weather phenomenon to overwhelm their grid by a long shot.

Even if hot & dry Texas installed the kind of pipes used in North Dakota's frigid blizzards, a fiercer storm could still overwhelm that.

Such a bizarre weather anomaly should make us sit up & pay attention.

It reminds me very much of Dor HaMabul (Generation of the Flood).

Prior to the global Mabul, Hashem sent repeated warnings in the form of natural disasters: earthquakes, local flooding, constant thunder & lightening...He even caused the Sun to rise in the West rather than the East when Metushelach passed away (Me'am Lo'ez, Parshat Noach).

See more here: http://www.myrtlerising.com/blog/the-generation-of-the-flood-has-reincarnated-into-our-generation-heres-the-evidence-also-what-you-can-do-to-protect-yourself-others

I don't know why davka Texas got hit with such extreme cold weather. It could be connected to a certain gashmiut, like how America's oil mainstay exists in Texas.

​Or something else entirely.

But several points stick out:

  • Such an extreme cold weather attack flies in the face of the global warming theory—a theory policy-makers use to extort money (carbon taxes, etc.) from citizens & invent useless programs (for both money & to gain or stay in power). 

Yes, I realize part of the global warming theory contorts itself to make it seem like global warming ironically leads to global cooling. But anyone with common sense can see that such cold extremes deny global warming.

  • Even those prepared found themselves in dire straights when their preps failed them—like their generator.

​Even those with enough food found themselves battling freezing temperatures with no way to even warm a can of beans or water for tea.

People with wood stoves didn't have enough wood prepared for this magnitude or couldn't always access the wood.

As noted by president of the Texas Farm Bureau, a dairy farmer himself for 40 years: "It's hard to prepare for what you've never lived in." (source)

His entire life, he never saw a weather event like this in South Texas.

​And he was prepared! He needed to be because of his livestock.

So despite previous cold weather events, there was never any reason to prepare for a cold weather attack of this magnitude, especially in South Texas.

Yet discussions abound on how Texas can "combat climate change" and how to better winterize Texas infrastructure, plus which politicians to blame.

​All that totally misses the point.

Dor HaMabul attributed their natural disasters to mundane reasons.

​And so does today's generation.

The Information Superhighway Will Remain Open until the End 

The Texas cold disaster also pinpointed a very interesting insight made by Rav Itamar Schwartz around a year ago in this PDF Q&A:
http://www.bilvavi.net/files/Bilvavi.Corona.Q.and.A.pdf.

(Please note that some of Rav Schwartz's students made transcripts of his original Hebrew lectures, then translated them into English, and one posted them on a website independently of Rav Schwartz. That's how I access his material.)​

He claimed that the nisayon of the media/Internet would last until Mashiach.

That struck me because it flew in the face of the sensible-sounding predictions made in society, like, "There won't be any CNN around to film the End of the World."

Or, "The End of the World will not be recorded."

Or Einstein's:  “I know not with what weapons World War 3 will be fought, but World War 4 will be fought with sticks and stones." 

​In other words, technology will be busted. Of course! How could it not?

But Rav Shwartz, with his Torah-knowledgable spiritually attuned point of view, said (page 10):
When the media will disappear, Moshiach will come.

But until Moshiach comes, the innermost level of the shaar hanun d’tumah [50th level of spiritual impurity/blockage] dominates in the world and it contains a mixture of kedushah [holiness] and tumah [spiritual impurity/blockage], from the highest level of kedushah all the way down to the lowest level of tumah.

That is why in this generation everything has become mixed and confused together in a disturbing way, which our logic cannot comprehend.

​This will not change until the coming of Moshiach.

And even more clearly on page 66:
Q.
What will be happen with the media (mass communication)?

A.
This is the last thing which they the media will cut off from. It is from this the media that they live from.

From this, they the media will not cut off!

​Hashem will be the One to cut it all off.

It's important to note that when Rav Schwartz says "media," he also means the Internet, social media, etc. (That correlation may not be clear in the above excerpts, but it's very clear throughout the original PDF.)

​Anyway, his idea intrigued me because in trying to imagine an End of the World according to this idea, I found it difficult to imagine, especially in light of what most people (especially American preppers) predict.

Yet we saw exactly Rav Schwartz's insight during the Texas disaster.

During some hours, people lacked power, electricity, heat, water...but they had cell phone service.

They managed to call loved ones & communicate online (send tweets, update Facebook, comment on blogs & forums)...even as they were unable to bathe, cook, heat their home, or any other basic modern function.

Running out of food & water, they still managed to charge the cell phones in their car.

​Isn't that weird?

Yet that's exactly what happened.

These are the times in which we live.

Following the True Wisdom as Best You Can

As you can see, I have Internet & email. 

I have access to media (though even the frum media is increasingly disappointing...).

I place a lot of restrictions on my Internet usage, but I'm not perfect about those restrictions and according to Rav Schwartz, I really shouldn't have it at all.

But I still follow him in whatever I can manage because that's how we grow on our own level: by listening to someone who tells us to reach higher, to wiggle at least a little bit out of our comfort zone.

Same thing with Rav Avigdor Miller.

Do you think I manage to uphold every single thing he advises?

Ha!

But I try to do what I can.

​The point here is to listen to the real Torah scholars. The ones who truly work on their middot, who possess real knowledge, who know how to think, and who understand how to analyze current events to offer us their true meaning & genuine wisdom regarding events.

True understanding is found among our own, starting from millennia ago until now.
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Please note that Rav Itamar strongly & lovingly opposes Internet use. He is in no way associated with the Bilvavi website, which was established by one of his students (probably via a charedi Internet center using Netfree) solely for the purpose of kiruv for secular Jews. See here for more: https://eng.bilvavi.net/opinion/

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What is the Torah View on Media & How It Affects Us?

23/2/2021

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Let's look at what's going on with the media in all its forms & view it from a Torah outlook.

Since the onset of covid-19 around a year ago, Rav Itamar Schwartz of Bilvavi repeatedly emphasizes the need to separate from anything that is not authentically Jewish (i.e. anything not based on Torah).

This does not mean just a physical separation, but an emotional, spiritual, and psychological separation.

This "spiritual distancing" also remained an ongoing theme with Rav Avigdor Miller throughout his life; he consistently noted sources to support this as a primary Torah ideal.

At the same time, both rabbis acknowledge how complex & challenging it is to do this.

So they give us the goal and the path to that goal, but at the same time, they also expresses sympathy with the difficulty, encouraging us with baby steps and also paying attention to our unique soul needs.

The Melting Media

Frankly, I feel far from this ideal. However, I've also made progress in this area, baruch Hashem.

It helps that nearly all media has turned into a one-track-minded golem of one type or another, an entity that cannot think beyond black-and-white and has shed any shred of integrity it once possibly had.

Even frum publications are becoming a drag to read, with their reliance on mainstream media for information.

​(Meaning, one needs to suffer reading how the current freezing disaster of Texas results from "global warming" or global warming's alter-ego: "climate change," plus a lot of biased fear-mongering regarding covid-19, sympathetic reporting of the BLM movement & the violent criminal drug-addicted negligent father who died under a cop's knee, plus concerns about "compliance" in the frum community—without rational explanations of why this desired "compliance" is scientifically valid, and so on.)

So I haven't been reading the news so much lately, even the frum news. 

With regard to Trump, the Left refused to engage in any objective reporting. They also displayed tremendous hypocrisy when they slammed Trump for engaging in behavior they themselves engage in.

But with literally a couple of exceptions (one being Ben Shapiro), the right also refused to view Trump with any objectivity.

So here we had:
One side viewed & portrayed him as evil incarnate while the other side viewed & portrayed him as the great savior possessed of only the loftiest intentions.

For a more balanced view of Trump's Presidency, please see the following:
https://hamodia.com/prime/navigating-national-meltdown-torah-guidance/

https://hamodia.com/prime/trump-media-truly-unbelievable-unbelievably-true/ (I mean specifically Samuel J. Abrams, who reflects a lot—though not all—of what I think too.)


And this increasing repellence in the media clearly results from Hashem, to help us disconnect from the media.

I'd say the same about the problems & ongoing revelations regarding social media—all these drawbacks help us disconnect. Whether that means to cancel one's account completely or to minimize usage, the annoyances & lack of ethics in social media helps us disconnect on some level.

I personally don't use any social media. If I did, I'm not sure if I would be able to stop. (Sort of like with Internet & email; once you've stepped into the web, it's nearly impossible to extricate yourself.)

So I'm not judging others for being on "Fakebook" or Twitter because I don't know if I myself would be able to extricate myself once already in...with gratitude to Rabbi Wallerstein who, via his shiurim on the topic, caught me right at the time of decision & convinced me not to even try out social media. But would I be able to stop once started? I honestly don't know.

(Just to clarify: There are good articles & beneficial material in the frum media. Many of the writers are good, sincere people. But there are problems too.)

Media Detracts from Your Individuality

Recently, I read how one of the European Torah Sages expressed his trepidation regarding the publishing of a frum newspaper to combat all the really awful brainwashing of secular Jewish media of the pre-WWII era.

He definitely saw the need for a frum newspaper, yet expressed regret how any newspaper harms one's individuality.

Even a frum newspaper impinges on one's individuality because it still affects independent thinking.

I wish so much I could remember where I read this! I'd like to quote it directly.

Nonetheless, the principle is easy to see. 

We all see how we're influenced by articles, blogs, op-eds, video clips, and the whole package.

​All this affects our emotions & our opinions.

Here is a PDF Q&A from Rav Itamar Schwartz's lectures on the media. Disclaimer: It is pretty strong & I'm not there yet either, but whatever you can take from it is very, very good. At the very least, people should be aware of this good hashkafah:
http://www.bilvavi.net/files/Bilvavi.on.the.Media.pdf

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-voting-to-save-the-country/ 
​(This is from 1980 & the U.S. is less decent than it was at that time, though certainly the media & entertainment industry still desperately tries to convince us that the average American is just as depraved as the industry is.)

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-how-to-become-a-baal-teshuva/

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-common-sense/

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-conservative-talk-radio/

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-fake-news/

torasavigdor.org/rav-avigdor-miller-on-the-danger-of-newspapers/

"Once upon a time when the world didn’t have any newspapers – when there was no literature – so it was possible for a person to think on his own and to have common sense."

-Rav Avigdor Miller
Tape #613


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The Lessons for Us Revealed in the Words of 2 Major Torah Sages in Modern Times

4/11/2020

 
There's an excellent article at Hamodia called Through the Eyes of a Gadol, regarding the Internet.

It presents interviews with 2 Gadolim [major Torah Sages], Rav Gershon Edelstein of Ponevezh Yeshivah and Rav Dov Landau of Slabodka Yeshivah, plus excerpts of speeches by Rav Edelstein.

Listening to the actual words of a big talmid chacham always creates an eye-opening experience.

They both think & feel very differently than the average person.

For example, one thing they do is ask "why." Or "what."

I noticed this in encounters with other Gedolim, like Rav Shteinman.

They want to delve into the issue & understand. So they ask "why."

So in this article, for example, Rav Edelstein asks, "What's the problem?" and "What do you mean by 'they need it'?"

Rav Landau asks, "Can you not do there what you do here?" and "Why is it different?"

And then they both listen to the reply.

Both opine that the Internet is extremely harmful. Yet they still inquire into the details and the listen.

Attitude: Sympathy

While Rav Edelstein speaks strongly against unfiltered Internet ("It is Gehinnom on earth and in the World to Come. It’s a double Gehinnom"), he also comes off as sympathetic to those who desire Internet.

For people who initially acquire Internet for their livelihood, but then end up using it throughout the day for other things (and only 10% of it for parnassah), Rav Edelstein doesn't criticize their desire or tell them to get rid of it completely (perhaps showing he understands that most people feel they simply cannot do that). Instead, he repeatedly emphasizes the need for a filter.

He doesn't expect people to make it on their own. He understands people need help.

He understands the tremendous pull of the Web, even though he personally does not struggle with this at all.

​Likewise, Rav Landau acknowledges that it is a terrible nisayon, and not a nisayon faced by previous generations.

Again, he doesn't castigate people, but focuses on what a thorny & unique nisayon it is.

Rav Landau also focuses on the people who are doing things right, like the success in Internet filtering in Eretz Yisrael (far from perfect, but there has been success) and emphasizing the yirei Shamayim & talmidei chachamim in America.

Clearly, both talmidei chachamim give everyone the benefit of the doubt.

Baby Steps Matter! You're Fabulous! Your Efforts MATTER! You're Making Yourself Great!

Then Rav Edelstein goes into a passionate description of gloriousness of people who overcome their yetzer hara in this nisayon [a very trying challenge], mentioning how this wonderfulness is true regarding any nisayon.

He praises small efforts: 
"...one moment spent doing teshuvah and good deeds in this world is better than all the World to Come. Even a single hour of teshuvah and good deeds! More than the entire World to Come!" 

Very encouraging.

He says a lot of good things about how the zechus [merit] created by overcoming this particular challenge brings success in parnassah [making a living] and with children.

I found this phrase particularly encouraging:
"Any time someone combats his nature it is a tremendous zechus..." 

"Every bit of improvement, every effort, every hardship faced. You cannot measure its value."

I have some major nisayonot (and not just the Internet), and I get really miserable in the struggle to overcome them. It's often all very wearisome.

And then I wonder if it's really worth it. And I wonder if I'm doing things right anyway. It gets confusing at times.

But seeing these statements from Rav Edelstein put new fire in me. 

I hope this renewed fire lasts at least until tomorrow—b'ezrat Hashem!

​I think the most amazing & encouraging statement from Rav Edelstein came regarding the people who hold strong in the Internet nisayon:
"They can give people brachos!"

"Absolutely! They can give brachos. They have siyatta diShmaya [Heavenly assistance]!"

They have the power to bless others? Seriously?

Whoa.

​But it must be true.

​Rav Edelstein would never say empty words.

Humility & Unity

Many talmidei chachamim today consider Rav Edelstein a Gadol.

But when he advises how to combat unkosher Internet usage, Rav Edelstein says that it's up to the Rabbanim...as if he isn't one—or as if he isn't one that committed American Jews wouldn't listen to (but he is!).

Rather than taking the reins, he outsources to the Rabbanim in the USA.

Likewise, when they speak with Rav Landau, he asks if they consulted with Rav Edelstein already.

When they reply in the affirmative, he responds, "We will follow whatever he says...Klal Yisrael cannot work if everyone gives an opinion."

Needless to say, Rav Landau's opinions are significant. He clearly knows his own mind & also the Torah. Yet he defers to Rav Edelstein as if he is not Rav Edelstein's equal. And he does so for the sake of what's best for the entire Jewish people.

In other words, no ego.

Finally, Rav Landau blesses the entire Jewish people:
"The Eibershter should help that everyone will be able to do what they need to do."

The entire interview shows how Rav Landau feels connected with his fellow Jews.

When the interviewer blesses Rav Edelstein that he should merit to greet Mashiach soon, Rav Edelstein replies:
"All of us together. All the Jews."
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A Little Bit about Lashon Hara

6/4/2020

4 Comments

 
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Many of our Gadolim already pointed to lashon hara as being one of the causes behind this pandemic and its bizarre consequences.

It's not surprising, especially since modern technology enables lashon hara to get out of hand, spreading around the globe – and to do so immediately.

Prior to modern technology, one simply could not commit lashon hara on the levels possible today.

How much lashon hara could you spread by mouth alone?

And that was already considered really, really awful.

Telephones & radios & newspapers increased the power of lashon hara.

Then with social media & Internet, the impact of one short phrase of even avak lashon hara (the dust of lashon hara) became magnified by thousands of times.

Podcasts & video-sharing sites also magnify lashon hara into the thousands.


Putting aside the blogs & websites (whether Jewish or not) that promote lashon hara, how many otherwise good people unthinkingly participate with a short comment or tweet – or even a thumbs-up "Like!" in response to a slanderous social media post?

Even people who care about lashon hara don't always realize that what they've read is forbidden.

Even if you care about lashon hara and have studied the laws, it's still easy to trip up in this area.

​We all have our blind spots and we also sometimes forget the halacha (which is particularly complex in the laws of speech).

Very Common Scenarios that Trip Up even the Best of Us

Though I've been through books on lashon hara, studying a halacha a day over a long period of time, I'm always surprised by what I miss at this point about lashon hara.

Right now, I subscribe to an excellent Q&A about lashon hara that arrives in my Inbox every day.

(You can also subscribe at the Chafetz Chaim Heritage Foundation HERE.)

This way, you can easily learn a halacha each day.

And here are some real-life examples that arrived from this Q&A to my Inbox, examples that trip up even good, well-meaning people:
Bothered by wrongdoing
​

The town I live in has an overwhelmingly Jewish population. Every day I drive to work during the morning rush in our town, and the aggressive way many people drive really bothers me. They push their way into traffic, giving drivers no choice but to let them in; honk their horns excessively; speed wildly through about-to-turn-red lights, etc.
​

Q:I feel that if I don’t talk about it, people may not realize how wrong it is! May I tell my coworkers or family members, “People in our town drive so aggressively, it’s appalling!”

 A: Talking about a group even without names is lashon hara. Additionally, many people speak like this with a “holier than thou” attitude that does not yield results and reinforces negative speech. This is loshon hora, and there is no excuse for speaking this way. If you are proposing realistic solutions to people who will take you seriously and make changes in the way they drive, that would be a valid to’eles, and speaking would be permitted.

Reviewed by Rabbi Zev Smith.  Actual halachic decisions should be made by a rav or halachic expert on a case-by-case basis.

How many people know that the above is forbidden?

Unless you are:
  • Offering practical solutions...
  • ...and offering them to people who will actually listen...

...then you aren't allowed to say it.

I missed this one myself because the person is speaking about such a general group (i.e., he's not targeting a specific individual or named group within the Jewish community; he's not even specifying whether it's a frum community) and because he has a good intention for speaking of it (he wants to stop it).

That's a big lesson for those of who blog (and gave me an "Uh...oh" sinking feeling in my own stomach).

Here's another from the same source on a more personal level. Again, note the good intentions of the person posing the question:
One neighbor on my (primarily Jewish) block is careless about where he parks his car. He blocks people’s mailboxes so the mail can’t be delivered. He obstructs people’s driveways so they can’t park or get out. He even parks in front of the garbage containers so that the garbage can’t get picked up. 
​

It really bothers me, but as a peaceable fellow, I don’t want to confront him about it. 

​Q: May I tell our shul Rav about it? This way, the Rav can speak to him and he’ll learn his lesson, and I won’t have to give up on my friendly relationship with him, since he won’t know it was I who told.

 A:   One may not speak loshon hora about another person even l’toeles (for the benefit of preventing people from being harmed) without trying to approach that person first. Your neighbor may change what he’s doing if he hears it from you. Ask advice from a knowledgeable person as far as how to approach your neighbor in a way that is tactful and respectful.

Reviewed by Rabbi Zev Smith.  Actual halachic decisions should be made by a rav or halachic expert on a case-by-case basis.

Isn't that such a common scenario? Especially since the questioner wishes to speak with a rav, and not just a friend or family member of the offender.

Especially because he wants to involve his rav, many people think that doing this is actually a GOOD idea. (Heck, I did too! And I've been reviewing hilchot lashon hara daily for a couple of years now.)

Surprisingly, it's not okay to even ask his rav to speak to the offender about it until he has spoken personally to the offender.

(This is, of course, in case where he's not sure whether the man will listen to him. If he knows for sure that the offending man won't listen, then it's a different question.)

​Here's another common scenario, also from the same source:
My husband’s the best person to intervene
 I was at my in-laws’ home for Shabbos, prepping the food with my mother-in-law before the Friday night meal. Suddenly she began criticizing the way I speak to my children. She was agitated and even called my parenting methods “lazy.”
​

Q:I’m hurt and surprised. My mother-in-law is generally a kind and sensitive woman with a refined nature and positive attitude. I want to tell my husband what happened so he can intervene with his mother and give her a chance to apologize or explain. May I tell my husband what happened even though it’s negative information about his mother?

A: When someone acts out of character, we must try to understand what happened and see it in a positive light. If it’s clear that the person really did speak or act incorrectly, we have to assume that she realized it and immediately regretted it. Speaking to someone else about the incident is usually not considered l’to’eles. (If the hurt person feels she can’t move on, then she should consult rabbinic guidance about venting to another person.)

Reviewed by Rabbi Zev Smith.  Actual halachic decisions should be made by a rav or halachic expert on a case-by-case basis.

Again, this is another common situation in which many people do not even think twice about before speaking with their spouse.

​And again, note how the questioner sees herself as a having a beneficial reason for speaking to her husband, especially since she wants to give her mother-in-the-law the benefit of the doubt and hear her side of it.

Time's Up

The above are all common situations engaged in by good, well-meaning people who care about hilchot lashon hara.

​It's so easy to trip up in such situations.

And then what happens when such things are upload to public outlets?

Or even a private email or text between only 2 people?

Many people in the frum community have been complaining about the online lashon hara since the beginning – and good for them.

To their credit, they leave warning comments after posts or articles containing lashon hara.

But it has been going on for a long time and just getting worse.

Hashem was very patient for a long time.

And now we're seeing the consequences of our behavior.

May we all do teshuvah to the point that we don't even WANT to speak lashon hara – not even by accident!


4 Comments

The Paradox of the Present Pandemic

2/4/2020

17 Comments

 
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The results of coronavirus contain both positives and some very distressing negatives.

This post addresses the consequences for both Jews (whether religious or not) and non-Jews.

First of all, it first achieved infamy in a place known for its violations of all 7 Mitzvot Bnei Noach.

As one example: Rabbanim in Eretz Yisrael actually forbade receiving organ transplants from China when they realized the likelihood of an innocent person (aka, political prisoner) being murdered to provide the new organ.

(This never became Israeli law, as far as I know, so only people who care about halacha listen. But still.)

And yes, some of the mitzvot violations in China are against the people's will, but not all.

For example, no one is forcing anyone to eat ever min hachai – yet some Chinese people do so happily with the approval of their surrounding society.

And while the Chinese government forced abortions on women about to violate their former one-child policy, no one forced Chinese women to abort their unborn females so that couples could have the son more desirable in Chinese culture. 

​(This has also given China the unnatural result of more males than females. Naturally, a society should have more females than males. China's ratio of males to females is the highest in the world: around 115 males for every 100 females. And yes, this is causing social problems.)

Furthermore, growing research shows that an increasing number of Chinese babies available for adoption are actually kidnapped from their families of origin. This is a particularly serious violation against the Noachide prohibition against stealing.

​And again, very few within Chinese society seem to care about this. Some do (and it's unfortunate that they're suffering along with everyone else), but most don't seem to.

And so on.

A Change in Values

Secondly, many venues reflective of ancient Greek culture are now either banned or limited.

A very happy result of coronavirus is the increasing shut-down of ancient Greek cultural activities, the shut-down of the Olympics being most symbolic.

Increasingly, people can also no longer gather together to watch young men chase leather balls across a wide swathe of green or across a polished court (AKA soccer & American football & basketball).

People can no longer watch the licentious half-time shows performed by young women who have no respect for their own tzelem Elokim.

They no longer have an excuse to brawl and commit other senseless harmful acts in their great enthusiasm for watching guys in funny uniforms assault leather balls with their feet or bats.

​Music performances, especially those known for their degenerate lyrics & acts, accompanied by rampant drinking & drugging & violent or lewd behavior, are being cancelled one after the other. (Yay!)

Movie theaters are emptying out.

And bars & dance clubs? These are the scenes of so many crimes (and are, in fact, the main source of college girls being violated — though most liberals refuse to acknowledge this), in addition to drinking & drugging & licentious behavior — and now they're emptying out.

How many lives have been harmed by the whole bar-hopping culture?

​That's all coming to an end.

Certainly, if people have stored a supply of alcohol at home or know how to make their own, they can still act like drunken chimpanzees in their own home.

But bar brawls that spill out into the street & prowlers looking for female prey are coming to an end (at least temporarily).

And who knows? Maybe drug addicts & alcoholics will have no choice but to dry out during quarantine.

Also, I heard about one couple with a young child from which the husband walked out and went to live with his brother.

But when the lockdown started, the husband decided he preferred to be with his child and decided to do his best to get along with his wife.

And so he moved back home.

As Per Tanach, Hashem has Distracted Our Enemies from Their Genocidal Plans

​​Our enemies in Iran are being decimated.

Interestingly, it seems to have hit the leaders first. During the Obama administration, the Iranian people themselves tried to change their government. Also, Iranian Jews repeatedly claim that your average Iranian does not suffer from Jew-hatred & are actually pretty nice in general.

The desire to destroy the Jews of Eretz Yisrael lies with the leaders of Iran, not the average citizen – and that's exactly who got hit first.

Furthermore, with Iranian leaders consumed with the virus now among their general population, they can no longer afford to focus on destroying Israel or funding terrorist groups.​

​Having said that, I'm still sorry for the suffering of those who wish to live moral & peaceful lives.

Showing One's True Colors

I still think Italy's high death rate (around 10%) is because the hospitals are making unethical selections, as per Rav Moshe Heinemann's Q&A session, in which (using well-known examples from the Gemara) he states that you cannot turn away a patient simply based on age. 

Italian hospitals have been turning away people over 60 – just because they're not 59. Or 22.

If a person reaches the point where he or she needs hospital treatment (whether a respirator or a vitamin C infusion or other effective treatments unable to be performed at home), and that person is turned away...well, that naturally increases the chance the person will die.

And by behaving with such a lack of integrity, a nation sours the din against themselves even further, which also increases illness & fatalities.

Italy is also the birthplace of Rome.

Chocolate, wine, opera, fashion, a powerful mafia, and unholy religious practices had and still have their root in Italy. 

There's nothing innately wrong with chocolate or wine, of course. By their focused excellence in these areas, it becomes a symbol of indulgence (rather than a criticism of the actual food itself).

​Also, while opera is considered a classy activity, have you ever read the opera storylines? They're silly at best & immoral at worst, as are some of the costumes.

And all these activities have drawn to a halt. (Well, mostly anyway.)

And now this center of Rome is singing self-aggrandizing songs (patriotic or sports anthems) from their porches to keep their spirits up while their hospitals turn away desperate people simply due to their lack of youth.

It's all rather Edomite, if you think about it.

I'm sorry for the innocent there who are suffering along with the self-indulgent. 

Just Say NO to National & Continental Unions

Countries must be more independent now.

The current situation forces them to enforce their borders.

Even within a country, they are enclosing cities and states.

In America, despite its lack of physical boundaries around each individual state, some states (like Florida) are enforcing its boundaries by placing checkpoints at all incoming roads and the airport.

Because most of Florida is surrounded by ocean, it only has states on its northern boundary. States surrounded by other states (like Wyoming, which has 6 states along its boundaries) will have a harder time doing this.

We learn in Parshat Noach that Hashem does not approve of mass unification.

Along with the plain text of the Torah regarding Migdal Bavel (the Tower of Babel), the commentaries are quite clear on this point.  

You can see the Kli Yakar detail all the problems with mass unification in The Kli Yakar on Parshat Noach, in which he explains the despite the nations' proclamations of peace as their objective for mass unification...in reality, mass unification leads to more war.

Remember, prior to World War I, Europe was led by monarchies who were related to each other – some several times over.

For example, Kaiser Willhelm II of Prussia & Germany was a first cousin to the British King George V of England; both were the grandsons of England's Queen Victoria. The monarchies of Sweden, Norway, and Denmark intermarried with each other and siblings ruled bordering countries.

The Queen of Greece had a royal British mother (Princess Victoria) and a royal German father (Frederick III).

Queen Marie of Romania was the daughter of a Russian princess and a British prince.

Even today, European royalty consists of second- and third-cousins.

​Yet all those marriages and intertwining sibling & cousins did not prevent WWI.

The only time unification leads to peace is when it consists of tzaddikim.

When Hashem disperses people, it's for their own good.


Likewise, you can peruse An English Translation of the Malbim on Parshat Noach to see that Malbim makes the same points as the Kli Yakar.

Most of the leaders of different countries (maybe all) are not good people. They operate out of self-aggrandizement and the desire to perpetuate anti-God ideas throughout society – just like Dor Haflagah.

All their ideas for mass unification and being "one big happy family!" and creating "a global village" actually lead to destruction, as detailed by the Torah commentaries.

Via coronavirus, Hashem has put a stop to this.

If you think about it, it could easily be that the number deaths from coronavirus is actually less than deaths resulting from mass unification, and this is Hashem's Chessed, even though it doesn't look like a chessed on the surface.

​But it is.

Making Room for Compassion

Despite the obvious fairness of the din and the positive results from the lockdowns, there is also a painful & difficult side to the whole situation.

And that shouldn't be ignored.

And while I haven't written so much about my personal experiences within one of the most intense lockdowns in the world (Eretz Yisrael), there are definitely very challenging aspects to it, believe me.

I've had my moments in which I feel seized with fear. Baruch Hashem, they've been moments and not entire days.

And there are other challenges too.

And I also know that people who live alone, or who live in cramped conditions within a large family, people who live with at least one difficult family member who refuses to try to get along and behaves even worse due to the situation, people with existing health problems, people who were dependent on cleaning help, people who naturally possess bundles of energy and are now confined to their apartment, people who find it exceptionally difficult to endure the current grocery-shopping challenge (waiting outside for a long time while maintaining the proper distance from other shoppers) only to enter and discover there are no eggs or pasta or band-aids left, people who need a constant supply of essentials like diapers & baby formula, people who've lost a family member & cannot receive the support they desperately need right now, and all sorts of other situations...

...so by focusing on the positive outcomes of coronavirus, I certainly do not mean to tromp all over the very real suffering of people.

It's just that we should realize that this pandemic and its bizarre consequences did not come for no reason.

For example, it's good that all the stupid sports events that lead to pritzus & violence & animalistic behavior have been nullified.

Some couples with poor shalom bayit have actually been treating each other better & helping each other more because they can't afford NOT to get along in the current lockdown. Also, there's more appreciation because of actually being at home & seeing what the other spouse actually does. (The ones I've heard from aren't saying that things are perfect — they still have their snapping-turtle moments — but there has been overall improvement.) 

Another benefit is that people who (consciously or unconsciously) built their self-worth on tremulous values (such as the ability to run a pristine home or produce amazing meals or excel in their career or sculpture themselves with gym workouts, etc.) are finding themselves trapped in limiting circumstances that are forcing them to redefine themselves.

In other words, people who (consciously or not) defined and/or esteemed themselves by their outside activities are now having to adjust themselves to their home & immediate family.

​This is ultimately a good thing, but understandably very difficult & even painful in the beginning.

Another example: For some people, the sudden opportunity to run their own Seder for the first time this year is the chance they've been waiting for.

For others, it's an overwhelming duty rife with disappointment & stress.

So again, the obvious good & seeming bad run in parallel lines.

What's more, it's very distressing that people are sick & dying, and that the bereft cannot receive the support and comfort they need.

It's also very distressing that people whose livelihoods depend on outside activities (like musicians, caterers, store owners, store clerks, plumbers, electricians, house cleaners) or people whose livelihoods depend on people coming to their home (ganenets, in-home daycare, health & cosmetic practitioners, in-home sellers, etc.) can no longer earn a livelihood.

​VERY distressing. (That's somewhat our personal situation right now too, BTW.)

Yet even when we can't physically help people, praying for them helps tons.

The Pandemic Paradox of Seeming Bad & Revealed Good Mixed Together

By seeing the results of coronavirus pandemic (especially the positive results), we get a better idea of what Hashem wants from us (both Jews whether religious or not & non-Jews) – ideas we can take with us for the long term.

  • He wants us to get along better – especially being nicer to those with whom we make our home.
 
  • He want us to enjoy all aspects of life, including chagim & simchas, just for themselves without feeling that extra extravagance is vital. (It might be more fun and more attractive, but we can still be perfectly happy without ice sculptures or crazy music or a limo, and so on.)
 
  • He wants us to become more inner-focused.​
 
  • He wants us to focus on ridding ourselves of actual chametz (and all the spiritual meaning that implies) rather than the non-essential spring-cleaning aspects (which, again, add a nice feeling for Leil HaSeder, but are not essential to Pesach).
 
  • He wants us to let go of our taavot. (I suppose I'm not the only one who bought lots of essentials without having the room or the money to stock up on cookies, candy, white flour, and chocolate?)
​
  • He wants us to give up our addictions. (With increasing lockdowns, alcohol & drugs are much harder to come by, if not impossible. Online gambling is unfortunately available – though increasingly limited finances discourage it – but casinos are no longer an option. Other unmentionable vices are also unavailable.)
 
  • He wants us to pay attention to how we pray.
 
  • He wants us to be careful about our speech and what we do when we interact with others.

There's more messages from Him, but you probably have your own good ideas.

Also, we probably all realize that in some ways, people might also behave increasingly worse, despite the obvious messages to behave better.

When isolated or cooped up in stressful environments, people also immerse themselves even more deeply in hi-tech outlets. (How many people are surfing, tweeting, texting, uploading "stories," playing video games, and watching videos even more than they were before?)

People are also sinking into less ideal behaviors, like drinking more, oversleeping more, smoking more, eating more, snarling more, fighting more, depression, paranoia, etc.

So yeah, again, there's the good and the bad together.

However, by conforming ourselves to Hashem's messages, we can avoid a worsening of the situation and hopefully halt the negative consequences in their tracks.

​​May Hashem eliminate coronavirus from our midst and grant all the cholim a complete & speedy refuah. May He also return us to our schools, yeshivot, and schools. May we experience true "simcha shel mitzvah." And may we always gather together for good reasons!


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