Growing up as girl in the Eighties, the surrounding culture beat into our heads the idea that we could behave and dress however we wanted.
Any negative consequences were never considered the results of our behavior (though in private people understood otherwise).
Outside of learning self-defense techniques, martial arts, or carrying a gun, there was nothing we could do to protect ourselves — nor did we need to, we were told.
We had THE RIGHT.
Yes, The Right to do whatever we wanted & go wherever we wanted & behave however we wanted...regardless of consequences.
Not matter how much survival instinct and just plain common sense says otherwise, this was & continues to be the message to girls.
But no one ever applies this kind of recklessness to any other situation.
For example, driving with situational awareness through a safari during the day in a sturdy car is okay.
It still involves some risk, yet many people do it with no negative consequences.
But strolling through a safari on foot at night when predatory animals are awake and on the prowl?
Not okay.
Hello, good ol' common sense (with regard to 4-legged predators).
And good-bye, common sense (with regard to 2-legged predators).
(And yes, college campuses are rife with 2-legged predatory "animals" cruising the bars in search of drunk young females on their own. If you speak with those who answer the calls on college crises hotlines, you'll discover this is THE most common situation in which college females are violated.)
Any negative consequences were never considered the results of our behavior (though in private people understood otherwise).
Outside of learning self-defense techniques, martial arts, or carrying a gun, there was nothing we could do to protect ourselves — nor did we need to, we were told.
We had THE RIGHT.
Yes, The Right to do whatever we wanted & go wherever we wanted & behave however we wanted...regardless of consequences.
Not matter how much survival instinct and just plain common sense says otherwise, this was & continues to be the message to girls.
But no one ever applies this kind of recklessness to any other situation.
For example, driving with situational awareness through a safari during the day in a sturdy car is okay.
It still involves some risk, yet many people do it with no negative consequences.
But strolling through a safari on foot at night when predatory animals are awake and on the prowl?
Not okay.
Hello, good ol' common sense (with regard to 4-legged predators).
And good-bye, common sense (with regard to 2-legged predators).
(And yes, college campuses are rife with 2-legged predatory "animals" cruising the bars in search of drunk young females on their own. If you speak with those who answer the calls on college crises hotlines, you'll discover this is THE most common situation in which college females are violated.)
Your Right to Cross at the Crosswalk However & Whenever You Want?
Let’s look at another example:
The answer to all the above, of course, is YES.
However, if you say: “I have the RIGHT to cover myself head to toe in black and cross on a crosswalk at night WITHOUT making sure drivers can actually see me AND WITHOUT checking for oncoming cars will stop...because crossing a crosswalk dressed however I want and at whatever moment I want is my RIGHT as a pedestrian” — then such an attitude could easily cause injury or death to the crossing pedestrian.
Why?
First of all, cars can’t see you.
And most drivers WANT to see you. They don’t want to hit you.
Second of all, there are dysfunctional drivers.
There are drivers who are tired or stressed or distracted. There are reckless drivers who speed and don’t check for pedestrians at crosswalks.
There are people driving while drunk or high.
Regardless of your right as a pedestrian, common sense and the instinct for self-preservation tells you before crossing at a crosswalk, you must make sure that any oncoming cars are going to stop.
For normal drivers, making sure you’re seen is enough. The moment they see you, they slow down and stop.
But for dysfunctional drivers, you need more caution.
Because you don’t know the drivers of the vehicles, you need to size up the situation before crossing the street.
Is the car speeding? Is it driving erratically? Is it slowing? Does it seem like the driver can see you? Is the driver paying attention?
If you want to cross while wearing all black at night, you need to take even more precautions, like wearing or holding something reflective or making double-sure there are no oncoming cars.
And because drinking alcohol impairs you judgement, you need to pay extra attention (even ask for help) — even if you’re dressed in all-white and crossing in daylight.
Why?
Because the DRIVERS aren't reliable.
If you're really drunk, maybe you shouldn't cross the street at all.
Or maybe you should find a friend to walk or drive you home.
- Do you as a pedestrian have a right to cross at a crosswalk?
- Do all vehicles—trucks, motorcycles, cars (from beat-up rust cans to luxury limos), buses—have the obligation to stop at the crosswalk and allow you to cross?
- Do you have the right to cross on a crosswalk at night?
- If of age, do have the right to cross the street after imbibing a few martinis?
- Do you have the right to clothe yourself completely in black and cross the crosswalk at night?
- And aren't all motor vehicles required by law & cultural courtesy to stop & allow you to cross at a crosswalk?
The answer to all the above, of course, is YES.
However, if you say: “I have the RIGHT to cover myself head to toe in black and cross on a crosswalk at night WITHOUT making sure drivers can actually see me AND WITHOUT checking for oncoming cars will stop...because crossing a crosswalk dressed however I want and at whatever moment I want is my RIGHT as a pedestrian” — then such an attitude could easily cause injury or death to the crossing pedestrian.
Why?
First of all, cars can’t see you.
And most drivers WANT to see you. They don’t want to hit you.
Second of all, there are dysfunctional drivers.
There are drivers who are tired or stressed or distracted. There are reckless drivers who speed and don’t check for pedestrians at crosswalks.
There are people driving while drunk or high.
Regardless of your right as a pedestrian, common sense and the instinct for self-preservation tells you before crossing at a crosswalk, you must make sure that any oncoming cars are going to stop.
For normal drivers, making sure you’re seen is enough. The moment they see you, they slow down and stop.
But for dysfunctional drivers, you need more caution.
Because you don’t know the drivers of the vehicles, you need to size up the situation before crossing the street.
Is the car speeding? Is it driving erratically? Is it slowing? Does it seem like the driver can see you? Is the driver paying attention?
If you want to cross while wearing all black at night, you need to take even more precautions, like wearing or holding something reflective or making double-sure there are no oncoming cars.
And because drinking alcohol impairs you judgement, you need to pay extra attention (even ask for help) — even if you’re dressed in all-white and crossing in daylight.
Why?
Because the DRIVERS aren't reliable.
If you're really drunk, maybe you shouldn't cross the street at all.
Or maybe you should find a friend to walk or drive you home.
Things You'll Never Hear People Say...Except to Girls & Women to Deny Them the Basic Right to Self-Preservation
Regarding crossing streets, no one says stupid things like:
Right?
We all recognize that, while a drunk or reckless driver is COMPLETELY at fault, it is in the pedestrians best interest (and SELF-interest) to take all precautions necessary BECAUSE of the risk of drunk, reckless, distracted, or tired drivers.
Note: It should be acknowledged the above isn’t the perfect parallel because most drivers don’t mean to hit pedestrians, yet men who violate women generally mean to do it. But the mashal of how a person needs to protect herself — even when it’s her “right” to do as she pleases — still holds true.
For example, even in the case of predatory animals actively looking for prey, the same precautions apply to a woman who wants to walk through a safari at night or to a woman walking down a street roamed by wild dogs. She simply should not do it. And if she finds herself in such a situation, she certainly should not go there drunk!
- “Telling pedestrians to wear night-visible clothing is blaming the victim.”
- “Telling pedestrians to take extra precautions when wearing all-black at night is essentially blaming the pedestrians who got hit wearing all-black at night.”
- “Pedestrians don’t need to take extra precautions—DRIVERS should just STAY HOME AT NIGHT! If people would stop driving at night, pedestrians would never get hurt.”
- "Sure, a lot of car accidents derive from drunk driving. But saying that, despite the driver’s clear guilt, the accident still could've been avoided had the pedestrian taken self-protective measures (like not drinking, which caused them to stumble into the crosswalk without looking first) —well, that shows you simply hate pedestrians and are a "mispedestrianist."
- “I don’t care whether it saves lives to warn pedestrians against crossing the street at night while drunk & dressed completely in black — you’re a pedestrian-hater for saying that. I mean, sheesh. This is why we FINALLY need a pedestrian for President! Only a pedestrian can be pro-pedestrians.”
- “Pedestrians have the RIGHT to cross at crosswalks WHENEVER they want, wearing WHATEVER they want, and at WHATEVER level of inebriation they want. I don’t CARE about the possibility of people driving while drunk, reckless, tired, or distracted. DRIVERS need to be careful, not pedestrians. We need to educate drivers to never get drunk, distracted, tired, or reckless. And until we achieve that, pedestrians should be allowed to behave however they want on sidewalks, crosswalks, and pedestrian lanes.”
- “Listen, drunk or reckless drivers also hit people wearing bright clothing in full daylight AND walking on the sidewalk! I mean, I once knew someone who wasn't anywhere NEAR a street — and she still got hit by a car. That means bad drivers are everywhere, so there's no point in taking precautions when crossing a street because people also get hit on by cars when not crossing streets.”
- “You're a pedestrian who insists on precautionary measures when faced with crossing a street? Well, you’re clearly not a modern pedestrian. Today’s pedestrians know better. Pedestrians are more liberated now. It’s the DRIVERS who need to change. It sounds like you’re suffering from low self-esteem. Maybe you should look into therapy and learn to respect yourself as a pedestrian.”
Right?
We all recognize that, while a drunk or reckless driver is COMPLETELY at fault, it is in the pedestrians best interest (and SELF-interest) to take all precautions necessary BECAUSE of the risk of drunk, reckless, distracted, or tired drivers.
Note: It should be acknowledged the above isn’t the perfect parallel because most drivers don’t mean to hit pedestrians, yet men who violate women generally mean to do it. But the mashal of how a person needs to protect herself — even when it’s her “right” to do as she pleases — still holds true.
For example, even in the case of predatory animals actively looking for prey, the same precautions apply to a woman who wants to walk through a safari at night or to a woman walking down a street roamed by wild dogs. She simply should not do it. And if she finds herself in such a situation, she certainly should not go there drunk!
Let's Encourage All Females to Conduct Themselves with the Same Self-Preserving Sensibility of Crossing a Street
Since its inception, feminism worked toward the dumbing-down of women and girls.
It’s true that women today are more intellectual and sophisticated than ever before.
But they aren’t as savvy.
(I'm serious. Talk to simple women from non-Western cultures where women had few rights. They're much savvier, possess much more common sense.)
Before the Seventies, women tended to handle situations with so much more common sense and wisdom.
And now, you can talk to a woman with, for example, a doctorate in calculus, and she can turn out to me one of the dumbest, most illogical people you have ever talked to.
(No, not always. And a lot of intellectual men are stupid twits, too. University professors in particular lack common sense. But this post focuses on the influence of the feminist movement on women, not men.)
And unfortunately, there will always be bad and/or drunk men until Mashiach comes.
And yes, it’s their fault if they hurt any female through their badness and drunkenness.
And yes, they should be punished.
But throwing young women into their path and brainwashing young woman against protecting themselves against such animals is outright cruel and heartless.
It’s true that women today are more intellectual and sophisticated than ever before.
But they aren’t as savvy.
(I'm serious. Talk to simple women from non-Western cultures where women had few rights. They're much savvier, possess much more common sense.)
Before the Seventies, women tended to handle situations with so much more common sense and wisdom.
And now, you can talk to a woman with, for example, a doctorate in calculus, and she can turn out to me one of the dumbest, most illogical people you have ever talked to.
(No, not always. And a lot of intellectual men are stupid twits, too. University professors in particular lack common sense. But this post focuses on the influence of the feminist movement on women, not men.)
And unfortunately, there will always be bad and/or drunk men until Mashiach comes.
And yes, it’s their fault if they hurt any female through their badness and drunkenness.
And yes, they should be punished.
But throwing young women into their path and brainwashing young woman against protecting themselves against such animals is outright cruel and heartless.
Related post:
www.myrtlerising.com/blog/two-powerful-lessons-revealed-by-dinahs-ordeal-in-parshat-vayishlach
www.myrtlerising.com/blog/two-powerful-lessons-revealed-by-dinahs-ordeal-in-parshat-vayishlach
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