My Wedding-Hitbodedut Experiment

A while ago, we read of Rav Avigdor Miller's advice (How to Break Out of being "Ordinary") on how to enjoy a wedding while under the assault of eardrum-blasting music:

​Do hitbodedut.

The rav reassured us that people will just think we're singing along with the band.

He also suggested that we daven for the couple as part of our hitbodedut.

Recently, I was at a wedding where I scrounged up the guts to try this.

I NEVER would have thought of this on my own and I certainly wouldn't have the guts to try it without Rav Miller's reassurance that this kind of hitbodedut looks like singing and not holier-than-thou eccentricity.

My personal addition was to sway back and forth while I spoke to Hashem because it doesn't really look like singing if I just sit there while my mouth is moving.

It helped a lot that the woman next to me kept breaking out in rhythmic clapping and chair-dancing in time to the music. (Thanks, Hashem!)

So here's my take on it:

• It's not as satisfying as talking to Hashem without heavy bass and loud warbling in the background, but it's definitely possible.

 

• Honest to gosh, no one thinks you're doing anything weird (or anything spiritual or meaningful, chas v'shalom! ;-). It really does look like you're just singing along.

 

• It gets the job done.

 

• It makes you feel good.

​

So I just wanted you to know.

And...

...try it! You might like it.