"Instead of stinging nettle, myrtle will rise" (Isaiah 55:13)
 "Instead of evil, good will rise." (The Malbim's Interpretation)
Myrtle Rising
  • Blog
  • Comments Disabled
    • Privacy Policy
  • Aliyah
    • Mini-Intro
    • General Cultural Insights
    • School Tips
  • Kli Yakar Index
  • Most Popular
  • Contact

The Silent Son

14/1/2016

0 Comments

 
The Kli Yakar’s elucidation on the Passover Hagadah’s Son Who Does Not Know to Ask was so incredibly instructive and so characteristic of our generation, I made it into its own separate post. (From Parshat Bo 12:26)

(For those who know Hebrew, I occasionally included the original Hebrew phrase for added clarity.)

​Enjoy!

Picture
Of the Four Sons in the Pesach Haggadah, one is deemed "the Son Who Does Not Know to Ask."

(The other Sons are: the Wise Son, the Wicked Son, and the Simple Son.) 

Because he is not even aware that he needs to ask (or because he does not know how), he doesn’t say a word; he is silent.

Fascinatingly, the Kli Yakar does not take this Son’s silence at face value. He asks the Abarbanel’s question: 

"How can it say that the Son is silent because he doesn’t even know to ask?

​Perhaps he is silent because he is completely wicked (rasha gamur) and doesn’t even want to speak about this mitzvah because it so despised (bazuyah) in his eyes?"

Then the Kli Yakar points out that only Hashem can really know a person’s heart.
So how can we know the real reason why someone is silent?

Needless to say, the Silent Son tragically describes the vast majority of Jews today—across all backgrounds and categories.

Some truly don’t know to ask. For one reason or another, they are literally unable to ask.

And some just aren’t interested because they despise the Torah values that don’t fit in with their liberal secular mentality or their unknowingly Esav mindset (i.e. addiction to materialism and wanting to be in control and attributing success solely to one’s own efforts rather than to Hashem).

So how should we handle this type when we can’t truly know what’s going on underneath the surface?

Start Off Soft 'n' Gentle

The Kli Yakar advises:
In order to find your way out of this confusion, go and say to him, "It is because of this that Hashem did for me in my exodus from Egypt."

​Then, no matter what, you have fulfilled your obligation. Because if he is wicked at heart (rasha b’lev), you have set his teeth on edge….and if he is not wicked, and simply does not know how to ask, then say to him this same verse…. because if he had been there, he certainly would have occupied himself with this holy service (avodah) [and merited Redemption].

Picture
Then the Kli Yakar explains how to speak to the Silent Son.

He notes that the word used — l’hagid (to tell) —sometimes indicates gentle speech, but other times, it indicates words “as hard as sinews.”

The Kli Yakar states that if such a person truly doesn’t know to ask, then you should “draw him to the service of Hashem” by using “gentle words that attract the heart of a person.”


If the First Method Doesn't Work, Then Go for the Double-Whammy

Later, the Kli Yakar goes into more detail:
And the Torah’s opinion is to first test the Wicked Son to see whether it’s possible draw him into the service of Hashem, using gentle words (devarim rakim)…..And if he “stiffens his neck” and will not listen to “a voice of whispers—kol melachashim” (indicating a gentle tone in addition to soft, gentle words), then….feed him words as harsh as sinews, which will set his teeth on edge and tell him:
​
"For the sake of this [the worship of Hashem], Hashem did for me"— for me and not for him.
But either way you deal with a Wicked (or secretly wicked) Son, the Kli Yakar reminds us:
The Hagadah says, "Do not be intimidated by the Wicked Son."
And then he emphasizes once again:
"The tipping point is (ikar hadiyuk talui) whether he is a servant of Hashem OR whether he is not servant of His."  

In other words, it comes down to the individual’s basic ratzon—his ultimate desire.

This is an incredible insight and profound advice.
 
In summary, the Kli Yakar is saying that you should give the Silent Son the benefit of the doubt and use “devarim rakim--soft (or gentle) words” and a soft tone of voice. And if he truly doesn’t know, then this approach will draw him closer. But if he is silent out of apathy and loathing, then these soft and gentle words will seem "hard as sinews, which set a person’s teeth on edge."

And that is how you can know exactly who you are dealing with.

Needless to say, this is EXACTLY what is going on in the world today.

Bringing It All Home

Now I’d like to make one final point:

There weren’t really secular Jews in the Kli Yakar’s time — well, very few, anyway.

The Silent Sons of the Kli Yakar’s time would have seemed pretty frum by our standards.

So if I understand this commentary correctly, any Jew — whether secular or frum — could either be silent out of innocent ignorance and the inability to even ask OR silent out of apathy and loathing.

How we respond to soft, gentle words of beautiful Truth reveals everything.

Needless to say, anyone can have a kneejerk hostile reaction upon hearing the Truth for the first time. 

That is actually pretty normal.

There are also people who argue as a way at getting at the truth.

That is also perfectly acceptable.

​But there are definitely people who reject and rebuff such words; they even physically turn away and refuse to listen, and do so consistently, whether they are outwardly frum or not.


Now, taking this one more step further, I couldn’t help thinking about how would I know which Son I am?

After all, being honest with yourself is one of the toughest challenges.

So I want to say that even if you suspect that you might be a seethingly Silent Son (which is basically a Secret Wicked Son), you can always switch over from a seething Silence to a receptive Silence.
 
No physical action needs to be taken; the switch is all in your mind.

If you'd like the Kli Yakar’s entire commentary on the Four Sons as found in Parshat Bo, Shemot I (Shemot, Va’era, Bo, Beshelach) is available in English with a fantastically lucid and well-researched translation by Elihu Levine.
However, the above is mostly my own translation and therefore, any errors are also mine.
Rabbi Shlomo Ephraim of Luntschitz (1550-1619) lived in Bohemia (which is today Poland and Czechoslovakia). He served as rabbi and dayan and wrote several books, the most well-known being his commentary on the Chumash known as the Kli Yakar. 
0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Privacy Policy

    Picture
    Please note this is an affiliate link. Meaning, I get a small cut but at NO extra cost to you. If you use it, I'm grateful. If not, you still get a giant mitzvah connected to Eretz Yisrael.


    Feedburner subscription no longer in operation. Sorry!

    Myrtle Rising

    I'm a middle-aged housewife and mother in Eretz Yisrael who likes to read and write a lot.


    Picture
    Sample Chapters

    Categories

    All
    Aliyah
    Anti Jewish Bigotry
    Anti-jewish-bigotry
    Astronomy
    Book Review
    Books
    Chagim/Holidays
    Chinuch
    Coronavirus
    Dictionaries
    Emuna
    Eretz Yisrael
    Erev Rav
    Gender
    Hitbodedut
    "If The Torah..."
    Jewish Astrology
    Kav Hayashar
    Kli Yakar
    Lashon Hara
    Love
    Me'am Loez
    Minchat Yehudah
    Mishlei/Proverbs
    Netivot Shalom
    Parenting
    Parsha
    Pele Yoetz
    Perek Shira
    Pesach
    Politics
    Prayer
    Purim
    Rav Avigdor Miller
    Rav Itamar Schwartz
    Rav L.Y. Bender
    Recipes
    "Regular" Jews
    Rosh Hashanah
    Society
    Sukkot
    Tammuz
    Technology
    Tehillim/Psalms
    Teshuvah
    The Lost Princess
    Tisha B'Av
    USA Scary Direction
    Women
    Yom Kippur

    Jewish Blogs

    Daf Yomi Review
    Derech Emet
    Going...Habayitah
    Halacha Q&A
    Hava haAharona
    Miriam Adahan
    My Perspective

    Shirat Devorah
    Tomer Devorah
    Toras Avigdor
    True Tzaddikim
    Tznius Blog

    Yeranen Yaakov
    Rabbi Ofer Erez (Hebrew lectures)

    Jewish Current Events

    Hamodia
    Sultan Knish
    Tomer Devorah
    Yeranen Yaakov

    Jewish Health

    People Smarts

    Archives

    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015

    RSS Feed

    Copyright Notice

    ©2015-2022 Myrtle Rising
    Excerpts and links may be used without express permission as long as a link is provided back to the appropriate Myrtle Rising page.

Home/Blog

Most Popular

Kli Yakar in English

Aliyah

Contact

Copyright © 2023
Photos used under Creative Commons from Brett Jordan, BAMCorp, Terrazzo, Abode of Chaos, Michele Dorsey Walfred, marklordphotography, M.Burak Erbaş, torbakhopper, jhritz, Rina Pitucci (Tilling 67), Svadilfari, kum111, Tim simpson1, FindYourSearch, Giorgio Galeotti, ChrisYunker, Jaykhuang, YourCastlesDecor, bluebirdsandteapots, Natalia Medd, Stefans02, Israel_photo_gallery, Commander, U.S. 7th Fleet, BradPerkins, zeevveez, dfarrell07, h.koppdelaney, Edgardo W. Olivera, nafrenkel88, zeevveez, mtchlra, Liz | populational, TraumaAndDissociation, thinboyfatter, garofalo.christina, skpy, Free Grunge Textures - www.freestock.ca, Nerru, Gregory "Slobirdr" Smith, trendingtopics, dolbinator1000, DonkeyHotey, zeevveez, erix!, zeevveez, h.koppdelaney, MAURO CATEB, kevin dooley, keepitsurreal, annikaleigh, bjornmeansbear, publicdomainphotography, Leonard J Matthews, Exile on Ontario St, Nicholas_T, marcoverch, planman, PhilWolff, j_lai, t.kunikuni, zeevveez, Ian W Scott, Brett Jordan, RonAlmog, Bob Linsdell, NASA Goddard Photo and Video, aaron_anderer, ** RCB **, Tony Webster, mypubliclands, AntonStetner, Zachi Evenor, MrJamesBaker, sammydavisdog, Frode Ramone, Wonder woman0731, wrachele, kennethkonica, Skall_Edit, Pleuntje, Rennett Stowe, *S A N D E E P*, symphony of love, AlexanderJonesi, Arya Ziai, ePublicist, Enokson, Tony Webster, Art4TheGlryOfGod, seaternity, Andrew Tarvin, zeevveez, Israel_photo_gallery, Iqbal Osman1, Matt From London, Tribes of the World, Eric Kilby, miracle design, RonAlmog, slgckgc, Kim Scarborough, DonkeyHotey, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, h.koppdelaney, gleonhard, Pedro Travassos, nociveglia, RonAlmog, Israel_photo_gallery, Septemia, Paulann_Egelhoff, Tatiana12, MAD Hippies Life, Neta Bartal, milesgehm, shooting brooklyn, RonAlmog, smilygrl, gospelportals, leighblackall, symensphotographie, zeevveez, Kyknoord, wotashot (taking a break), Tambako the Jaguar, bitmask, Arnie Sacknooson, mattymatt, Rob Swystun, zeevveez, Dun.can, Tim Patterson, timeflicks, garlandcannon, HRYMX, fred_v, Yair Aronshtam, zeevveez, Ron Cogswell, FindYourSearch, Israel_photo_gallery, Serendipity Diamonds, zeevveez, Steve Corey, Dominic's pics, leighklotz, Stefans02, dannyman, RonAlmog, Stephen O, RonAlmog, Tips For Travellers, Futurilla, anomalous4, Bob Linsdell, AndyMcLemore, symphony of love, andydr, sara~, Gamma Man, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, robef, European Southern Observatory, Brett Jordan, Johnny Silvercloud, Israel_photo_gallery, smkybear, --Sam--, Paulann_Egelhoff, Selena Sheridan, D'oh Boy, campbelj45ca, 19melissa68, entirelysubjective, Leimenide, dheera.net, Brett Jordan, HonestReporting.com, Iqbal Osman1, One Way Stock, Jake Waage, picto:graphic, Marcelo Alves, KAZVorpal, Sparkle Motion, Brett Jordan, Ambernectar 13, Howdy, I'm H. Michael Karshis, Steven DuBois, Cristian V., tortuga767, Jake Cvnningham, D'oh Boy, Eric Kilby, quinn.anya, Lenny K Photography, One Way Stock, Bird Eye, ell brown, Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com, Kevin M. Gill, lunar caustic, gerrybuckel, quinn.anya, Kaz Andrew, kodomut, kayugee, jintae kim's photography, Futurilla, terri_bateman, Patty Mooney, Amydeanne, Paulann_Egelhoff, Mulling it Over, Ungry Young Man, Ruth and Dave, yangouyang374, symphony of love, kennethkonica, young@art, Brett Jordan, slgckgc, Celestine Chua, rkimpeljr, Kristoffer Trolle, TooFarNorth, D'oh Boy, Grace to You, LittleStuff.me, Kevin M. Gill, philozopher, traveltipy.com, Alan Cleaver, crazyoctopus, d_vdm, tonynetone, penjelly, TheToch, JohnE777, hello-julie, DaveBleasdale, Michael Candelori Photography, andessurvivor, slgckgc, byzantiumbooks, sasha diamanti