We all have times in our lives where we desperately need a break.
Life is trampling over us like a galloping rhinoceros on steroids.
At this point, many people receive helpful advice to take a break, take a vacation, take a night out, take a nap, get a babysitter, get cleaning help, order takeout...
But sometimes, none of these options are available for you at that time.
Or maybe a couple of them are available, but what you genuinely need is a 2-week vacation, while a nap or an evening out will hardly help and even cause more problems, albeit different ones (i.e. a nap causes you to wake up to a chaotic mess and prevents you from being tired enough to go to bed on time, an evening out costs money, time and other stress, etc).
This is one of the more difficult situations to accept with emuna, with any positivity or yishuv daat, or hope for a better tomorrow (although you may have hope for a better next year).
Overexhausted and overloaded, you may struggle with the very act of thinking, with any attempt to focus your mind.
The mere act of saying "Thank You, Hashem" or "Gam zeh l'tovah" (forget about feeling grateful; just mouthing the words) may seem like an impossible hurdle.
At this point, you may also read, recall, or hear that if you're not getting your desperately desired 2-week break, then it's because it's not what's best for you. And if it's not what's best for you, then you don't need it.
So then you're actually fine, right?
Wrong.
It can be really debilitating if someone actually tells you this because they're basically dismissing all your very real suffering and angst as no big deal.
If Hashem gave you this nisayon, then you do possess the fortitude to handle it, even if you feel like you don't.
But as one old hillbilly woman in impoverished Applachia quipped, "God never gives you more than you can handle, but He sure can bend you double at times!"
You can genuinely need something, but it's still not best for you, so Hashem withholds it from you for reasons you don't or can't know.
Life is trampling over us like a galloping rhinoceros on steroids.
At this point, many people receive helpful advice to take a break, take a vacation, take a night out, take a nap, get a babysitter, get cleaning help, order takeout...
But sometimes, none of these options are available for you at that time.
Or maybe a couple of them are available, but what you genuinely need is a 2-week vacation, while a nap or an evening out will hardly help and even cause more problems, albeit different ones (i.e. a nap causes you to wake up to a chaotic mess and prevents you from being tired enough to go to bed on time, an evening out costs money, time and other stress, etc).
This is one of the more difficult situations to accept with emuna, with any positivity or yishuv daat, or hope for a better tomorrow (although you may have hope for a better next year).
Overexhausted and overloaded, you may struggle with the very act of thinking, with any attempt to focus your mind.
The mere act of saying "Thank You, Hashem" or "Gam zeh l'tovah" (forget about feeling grateful; just mouthing the words) may seem like an impossible hurdle.
At this point, you may also read, recall, or hear that if you're not getting your desperately desired 2-week break, then it's because it's not what's best for you. And if it's not what's best for you, then you don't need it.
So then you're actually fine, right?
Wrong.
It can be really debilitating if someone actually tells you this because they're basically dismissing all your very real suffering and angst as no big deal.
If Hashem gave you this nisayon, then you do possess the fortitude to handle it, even if you feel like you don't.
But as one old hillbilly woman in impoverished Applachia quipped, "God never gives you more than you can handle, but He sure can bend you double at times!"
You can genuinely need something, but it's still not best for you, so Hashem withholds it from you for reasons you don't or can't know.
When God Bends You Double
For example, if someone is stranded in the middle of the desert with no supplies for 2 days and is severely dehydrated and thirsty, would you say that this person does not need water?
Of course not. He obviously NEEDS water.
He doesn't just want water, he's not just some petulant kvetch who simply wants things his own way -- he NEEDS water!
However, it is a solid fact that everything Hashem does is for our benefit, for our very best, and only He knows all the factors involving your soul, your past lifetimes, your deeds, your soul corrections, and much more.
So it may be that it is best for that person to dehydrate at the same that he genuinely needs water.
And it's perfectly legitimate for someone being trampled by a galloping rhinoceros to express a need for relief.
Worldly needs are real needs.
Ultimate unfathomable soul needs are different and may conflict with worldly needs.
But a worldly need is very real.
And it's perfectly appropriate to sympathize with and validate that need, and to help the other person fulfill that need (if you can), just as you would do for the thirsty man stranded in the desert.
Of course not. He obviously NEEDS water.
He doesn't just want water, he's not just some petulant kvetch who simply wants things his own way -- he NEEDS water!
However, it is a solid fact that everything Hashem does is for our benefit, for our very best, and only He knows all the factors involving your soul, your past lifetimes, your deeds, your soul corrections, and much more.
So it may be that it is best for that person to dehydrate at the same that he genuinely needs water.
And it's perfectly legitimate for someone being trampled by a galloping rhinoceros to express a need for relief.
Worldly needs are real needs.
Ultimate unfathomable soul needs are different and may conflict with worldly needs.
But a worldly need is very real.
And it's perfectly appropriate to sympathize with and validate that need, and to help the other person fulfill that need (if you can), just as you would do for the thirsty man stranded in the desert.
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